Buffy's POV

I did it. I told her the truth. The truth about what happened to me, about where I was... well, mostly. But the important thing is, now she can go away and never come back.

Bitch!

All that crap she kept spewing about great love and how she couldn't live without me it just, pissed me off so much. It'll never last. It doesn't matter how much we want each other, one of us will sooner or later wind up dead and ultimately be better off for it. And I kinda hope it's me.

Faith's never been dead, she doesn't know what she's missing, I do. I've felt it every moment since I've been back. The pain, the emptiness, I feel alone in a room full of friends and it's all Faith's fault. I never would've been brought back if it weren't for her. I can't be with someone who would do that to me. Someone who could rip me out of heaven just because they can't live without me.

I'm not stupid. I know that Faith didn't do the spell herself. She doesn't have that kind of power, but Willow wouldn't have done it if Faith hadn't asked her to, I know that much. This is all Faith's fault and I can't just let that go.

Faith's POV

This is all my fault. She hates me.

I walk up to the door of the Summers' home and I'm afraid to go in, even though Buffy isn't home.

I made the woman I love hate me. How could I do that? This is all my fault. If I had just tried harder or been a stronger person then none of this would've happened. Buffy would be happy and I... would still be miserable but, I'd know without a doubt that she loved me.

But now all I know for sure is that she hates me and it's all my fault. What do I do now? How can I go in there and tell Joyce I broke my promise to her? I promised Joyce I'd never hurt Buffy and I broke that promise. Now I have to face the music. Buffy hates me. Any minute now Joyce is gonna hate me for hurting her daughter and I can only imagine things getting worse from here.

I start pacing back and forth outside the door.

I thought, I thought things would be better with Buffy back. She always makes things better, until now. I'm scared out of my mind...

The door suddenly opens and Joyce is standing on the other side.

"Faith? What are you doing out here?"

Going insane?

"Nothing..."

"Well come inside, you do live here after all."

For now I guess.

I go in and she closes the door behind me.

"Can I make you some hot tea? Or something to eat maybe?"

"No, I'm okay."

I'm so far from okay.

We walk into the living room and sit down.

"Okay, what's wrong?"

"What? Nothing... nothing's wrong."

"Don't give me that, something wrong and I wanna help."

Help... that's all I wanted to do for Buffy too, and look how that turned out.

"It's nothing..."

"Faith, did something happen?"

"It's just... I broke my promise."

I lower my eyes.

"Your promise? Which promise is that?"

Gotta face the music...

"I p-promised you I'd never... hurt Buffy."

Joyce puts her hand on my shoulder.

"What are you talking about? What happened?"

"She, she hates me."

"Buffy? Why would you say that? She doesn't hate you."

"No she does, she really does this time."

"What happened?"

"It's all my fault. She blames me for it and she should. It's all my fault."

"What is? Faith you have to tell me what's wrong before I can help."

I lean on Joyce's shoulder as I feel the tears in my eyes.

"She was happy..."

"What?"

She puts her arms around me to comfort me.

"She, she told me she was happy."

"What do you mean?"

"B-Buffy... where she was when she, she was happy. It's all my fault."

"It's not Faith. You have to stop saying that."

"But it is. I'm the reason she died, I'm the reason she was brought back. I'm the reason she hates me."

"Faith we've been through this."

She pulls me off her to look in my eyes.

"Buffy gave her life for yours because she loves you, and she still does."

"No she doesn't, she hates me."

She wipes away a tear on my cheek.

"She does not. She might be angry with you but she doesn't hate you. Buffy doesn't have it in her to hate someone, trust me I know."

"But, it's my fault."

"You can't blame yourself for what we did. We made the decision to bring Buffy back. Whatever is happening now, whatever Buffy is going through is our fault not yours."

"But you did it for me. You brought her back because of me."

"We didn't have to. We could've decided not to but we didn't. That's not your fault."

We... she keeps saying we.

"What do you mean w-we?"

"It was me who made the final decision about Buffy. This is more my fault than yours."

"I guess, it's just... she blames me for being taken out of, where she was."

"She's angry, and she's not sure how to deal with it. She's lashing out at anyone in striking distance and you're the first one in range. She doesn't hate you and she's not angry with you specifically. She's just, angry. Give her time to deal with it and I'm sure she'll get better."

I feel the tears in my eyes go away slowly.

"You really think so?"

"I promise."

How does she make everything feel better when it's spinning out of control?

"Thank you."

I hug Joyce.

"Thank you."

"It's all gonna be okay Faith."

Just then, the door opens. It takes me a few seconds for me to remember to turn around. Buffy is standing inside the main hallway, staring at the floor with a thousand yard stare. I stand up to greet her.

"Buffy I..."

"Get out."

What?

Joyce stands up behind me.

"Buffy? How can you...?"

"I want her to get out."

She doesn't even look at us when she speaks.

"Go, leave, move out, whatever just... go..."

"Buffy, how can you talk to Faith that way?"

"I want her to go away, she knows why."

Joyce told me to give her time.

"I guess I should..."

I trail off and start to leave but Joyce puts her hand on my shoulder.

"No, Faith you're not going anywhere."

"Yes, she is."

"No Buffy she's not. Buffy this is my house and I say she's staying right here."

"I don't wanna look at her."

"Well sometimes people don't always get what they want in life Buffy, and I say Faith is staying right here with us."

I think I hear Buffy growl under her breath, probably at the thought of me staying here.

"Fine just, keep her out of my way."

With that, Buffy leaves and goes upstairs. I wanna go after her but Joyce stops me.

"Faith, no..."

I wanna go after her.

"But I..."

"I know, you want to go after her but that won't help."

Like she said...

"Give her time?"

She smiles at me.

"Yes."

"Okay but... where am I gonna stay?"

"With us, we have a guest room upstairs that we never use. You can stay there if you like."

"Okay, okay good I... thank you. I don't think I could spend a night too far away from her now that she's back."

Joyce puts her arm around my shoulders and leads me out of the living room and into the kitchen.

"Come on, we'll have ourselves some nice healing cookie dough ice cream and then we'll get you set up in the guest room."

"Okay..."

She really is a good mother.