I blink few times before returning my focus in the book I'm reading. My parents are still not home, my brother, I mean my cousins are often here in our house para may makasama ako dito kahit papaano. My attention averted to the telephone that is ringing at my right side. Nag dadalawang isip pa ako kung sasavutin ko iyon, so in the end niligpit ko nalang yung book na nasa harap ko saka lumabas ng library.

Nakita ko si Uncle Calleb na papasok palang galing ng patio. Ngumiti agad ako saka sya sinalubong. I love my uncle very much because he's sweet and bubbly. Parang si Ate Cleo although may pagka maldita si ate.

"Hi there, sweety. I brought some dresses for you. Your Auntie said she wants to buy you some of that." He said. He kiss my forehead just like before. I guess? I giggle.

"Thanks Uncle! Tell Aunt Frio I'll treat her pag di na ako busy sa school, okay?"

Tumango lang ito saka kami dumeretso sa living room. The maids prepared some snack for us. Ako naman tinignan ko ang mga regalo ni Auntie. Ang gaganda nila at galing sa isang kilalang shop. I thank him again as he watch me trying to fit it. Natigilan lang ako ng mag salita si Uncle. He seems bothered from his look, I can already tell.

"Hija, are you okay here? Matatagalan daw ang parents mo sa New Zealand, you might feel lonely here.." I know there's next to his words pero pinabitin nya iyon.

"I'm okay here, Uncle. I want my parents to see me staying here in our house when they get home." pero mukhang di sya kampante sa sagot ko. "Uncle, really, I'm fine here."

"Alright. Just call me or any of your cousins if ever you changed your mind." He heave a sight before looking at me. I smile to him sweetly as I went to his side and wrap my arms around his. "You're Dad would kill me for sure.."

"Why would he do that, Uncle? My Dad is the most wonderful person in the whole wide world." I said like a five year old girl. He laugh and bump me a little. "What? I'm just telling the truth!"

"You used to tell me I'm the best guy in the whole world." He said grinning

I narrow my forehead. "I did?" I laugh when his grin fades away.

We talked about unnecessary things and after a while Uncle Calleb decided to go. I'm already fixing my new clothes   when the telephone rang again. I ignored it and head to the bathroom and took a shower.

It was just a slip of second when I felt a heavy stare from my back. I flinch in horror but no one is there. My hands are shaking trying to grab my phone but i felt no energy to dial my phone and call my parents. It's so uncomfortable to the point it makes me want to hide myself under my blanket.

"Dad.. Mom.." I call. My eyes are starting to heat up till warm drops started to flow from my eyes. My body is trembling for I don't know reason.

I've been thinking about this. Bakit ako natatakot? Ano ba ang dahilan bakit ganito ang nangyari sakin. Hindi ko maintindihan dahil maraming blangkong pangyayari sa isipan ko. May mga pangyayari na hindi ko alam kung talaga bang nangyari pero hindi ko matandaan.

It's confusing..

Gusto ko itanong kila Dad.. Kung kilala ba nila ang lalaking naka pula. Pero hindi ko magawa sa takot na malaman ng katotohanan.

*ENRICO'S

I swallow the lump in my throat and walk towards my friends. Raymond is in there too. I sat and rest my head couch. Umayos lang ako ng may mag dikit ng beer sa pisngi ko. Nailing ako saka iyon kinuha at tinungga. Kalahati nalang iyon ng ibaba ko.

"Easy, man! Marami ako nyan, hindi ka mauubusan." Mark. Umupo sya sa pwesto ko saka tumingin sa baba ng VIP room. "Ano nang balita?"

"Stress ka pa rin ba sa baby sister mo? Kung ako sayo, hahayaan ko na siya. Hindi ba iyan naman ang gusto mo?" Raymond said with a grin.

Hibdi ko iyon pinansin. Wala dilang alam sa nararamdaman ko para kay Rhyon. Kahit ako naguguluhan sa sarili ko. Hindi ko alam na mangyayari ito. She's a sister to me and nothing more, that this feelings isn't for us.. I always tell to my self,  I shouldn't. But my heart tells me I should.

I should take care of her more.

I should cherish her more..

I should.. Treat her better than before..

That I should be more vocal in things that I want to do or tell her.

"Natahimik ka ata?" Joseph.

I shrug and drank my beer. Kumuha pa ako ng isa saka iyon ininom. Tinawanan lang nila ako sa reaksyon na binigay ko.Mga tarantado talaga ang mga ito kahit kailan. Kahit di dapat, pinag tatawanan nila ako.

Nag simula iyan ng araw na.. Hinalikan ko si Rhyon. It's just that.. they said it reflects in every movement i make. Pero di ko sinabi sa kanila na ganon ang nangyari. I want that private moments just for us.

I want Rhyon to think of me as someone she doesn't want to loose again. I want her to feel the passion she had for me before. i want everything to get back from what it should be.

Mga panahon na para sa akin lang ang atensyon, oras,  at pag mamahal nya.

Masakit na hindi ko binigyan pansin iyon noon, na hindi binigyan halaga ang pag mamahal na kaya nyang ibigay. Alam ko na ang tanga ko, pero natakot ako noon. Ayaw ko na magkaroon ng kahit anong ugnayan sa kanya bukod sa pagiging kapatid dahil hanggang ngayon alam ko na may nakaraan ang mga magulang namin at ayaw ko na madagdagan pa iyon ng dahil sa amin.

I never thought of her as my lover. Never.

"How is your sister?" Mark. "I've heard from this fucker, she turned to something.. Fresh." Noon, nagagalit ako pag ganyan ang sinasabi nila about her, as a brother.. But now, its different..

Masamang tingin ang binigay ko sa kanya. i heard Joseph laugh and look at me. I'm glad na hindi kami nagka siraan ng mag hiwalay kami ni George pero mukhang mas tumigas ang mukha ng gagong ito. Gracious! Because of them napapa mura ako ng wala sa oras. Nakakainis dahil hindi sapat ang inis ko para patulan silang tatlo.

"Alam mo, kung ako sayo sasabihin ko nalang ang totoo. Hindi ba ayaw mo nag sisinungaling sa kanya? You treat her as your sister, she has the right to know what mistakes you did to her that led her to be like what she is right now. Enrico, Rhyon is a good kid. Alam natin yon lahat kahit demonyita sya madalas. Dahil kung hindi, tingin mo makakaranas ka ng pag mamahal mula sa ibang babae kung di sya nag paparaya?" Raymond.

"Amen. God is good!" Mark.

"All the time!" Joseph.

"Tarantado!" Raymond. Nagatawanan lang kami sa sinabi nya but deep inside, naintindihan ko kung ano ang sinasabi nya.

Yeah.. Bakit nga ba hindi ko naisip iyon. Siya, andyan para mag mahal sakin, habang ako nag hahanap.

Its ironic how foolish we become when it comes to love.

---

Hey Babies.