Thirteen
Mary stirs in her sleep and cuddles closer to the warm body beside her. The sun is out and illuminating the room with its warm rays as if its saying hello. Alec's standing in the doorway with wide eyes.
He's just made it back from Elena's to find boxes downstairs and another man in his bed. It shouldn't piss him off because he's still cheating on her, but it does because they're married and it's his bed.
Alec can't really make out who he is, but he'll get the chance to in a moment when Mary wakes up. He clears his throat loudly to get her attention. She's a fairly light sleeper and he's sure that it will do the trick.
It works, but not in the way that he'd expected. He doesn't remember that, since he's been staying here, Mary's been a lot harder to wake up than he remembered because she's gotten so used to staying up late and sleeping alone.
Mary stirs again and a soft groan escapes her lips. She can see the light behind her eyelids and she absolutely does not want to get up. A few hours of sleep was fine when it was the same thing night after night, but now she's gotten used to going to bed at a reasonable hour and the lack of sleep is really hitting her hard.
In an attempt to block out the sun, she rolls over to face the windowless side of the room. There's a little difference and it's enough for her to sigh contentedly and focus her mind on going back to sleep.
Alec clears his throat again because she still hasn't opened her eyes or acknowledged his presence. This time, the sound is enough. Mary's eyes snap open and she immediately sits up.
It takes her a moment to focus because her eyes are incredibly heavy and her mind is still bogged down with sleep, but once she does her eyes widen and a knot forms in her stomach.
Harry's awake now and he mumbles something about her coming back to bed as his arms reach for her and pull her closer. Despite the fact that this is where she wants to be with him, she just can't go back to sleep because Alec's here and he looks pissed.
"Alec..."
Now Harry opens his eyes and sits up just like Mary. They're both afraid of what he might do, especially Mary because she knows that he's threatened Harry before.
The tension builds and builds as the three stare at each other not knowing what to do.
Alec is the first to rip the tension in half, "What the hell is going on, Mary?"
She doesn't know what to say. There are so many things swimming through her mind and breaching the surface, but she's not sure which one will get the point across the way that she wants to.
Harry finds her hand under the covers and gives it a reassuring squeeze. She's shaking and she still hasn't said a word. He wants to say it for her, but he can't because that wouldn't be right. He can't do that because it isn't his place to. Mary needs to do this on her own.
His small action gives her the reassurance that she needs to say what she really needs to, and what she really wants to say. This is it, she's finally going to leave him.
"This is me leaving you. I'm done Alec. I can't handle the lies anymore and, quite frankly, you don't love me because, if you did, you wouldn't still be seeing Elena behind my back. Harry's here because he doesn't treat me like I'm just another object to have under his belt. The boxes downstairs are yours and I want you to get your stuff out by Friday afternoon."
Mary closes her eyes and takes a deep breath to keep herself calm because this hurts so much. Even though he's hurt her time and time again it hurts to have to give up on something that was once good.
"I want a divorce and you're not changing my mind. You can have whatever you want, I don't care. Just—please, please don't take my daughter away from me. I'll never forgive you if you take her away from me."
She looks up at him again and he looks like he's actually upset. But she refuses to let that sway her because he's done this before and it's always come back to bite her in the ass.
Alec's mouth opens and closes as he realizes that she really means it this time. She's really leaving him and this time he can't convince her that she needs him because she's found someone else that's shown her that she can do things on her own.
And she wants custody of Ember. He's not sure if she wants full custody or not and that worries him because he doesn't want to not be in her life because he's her father and he still loves her even if he doesn't show it sometimes.
"Can I still see her?"
Mary bites her lip as she thinks about it. She doesn't want to see him if she doesn't have to, but he is her father and she can't make that decision for her daughter.
"That's up to her."
Alec's gaze shifts to his feet as he brings a hand up to run it through his hair, "Can I at least tell her goodbye?"
"Yes, but not right now. She's asleep and it's early, I don't want you to wake her up just to upset her."
Harry hasn't said a word yet, and Mary's grateful for that because it kept Alec from snapping and it let her express everything that she needed to. It's silent for a long moment as Alec shifts on his feet awkwardly, his gaze lingering on Mary.
She knows what he's doing and she refuses to let him do this to her again. Mary takes a deep breath and holds onto Harry's hand a little tighter, "Please leave."
"Mary..."
"Stop, Alec. This is it, it's over."
He gives her one last sad glance before nodding and running his hand through his hair again. Alec stands there for a moment before turning on his heel and walking away.
Mary sighs and leans back into Harry, his arms encircling her almost instantly. He rests his head on her shoulder and speaks softly because he knows that she's falling apart inside. "You needed to do that. I know that you feel terrible and that you're falling apart right now, but that's okay. I'll be here for as long as you want me to be."
She's shaking and holding her hands over her eyes before he can say anything else. He hates seeing her like this, so broken and upset, but he'd rather be there with her to comfort her than somewhere else while she's lonely and falling to pieces.
"What am I going to tell my baby? How do I tell her t-that her daddy doesn't l-love me anymore?"
Harry exhales through his nose and gently pulls her hands away from her eyes. He gently turns her around so that she's looking at him as he speaks, her light eyes wide and glossy and her lips trembling.
She calms down a little as he takes her hands in his, his eyes soft as he forms the words in his head. "As sweetly as you can, you tell her the truth. It's going to hurt both of you and she's probably going to cry, but if you cover it up and make her believe something else it will get her hopes up and disappoint her. She's like you, strong, and bright, and beautiful, and I know that the two of you will get through this together, just like you've been getting through it together since it started. I know how hard this is, my parents divorced when I was a little older than her, but it will be okay, Mary. She'll be okay. I can talk to her if you'd like that, that way she'll know that someone else understands and that she can talk to me too."
There's something about the way he said it and the look in his eyes when he spoke that has Mary at a loss for words. She's already thought so highly of him with his sweet nature, his kindness, and his manners, but there's something about this that really warms her broken heart.
He's even offered to lend Ember his heart and his personal experience to make sure that she's alright, as if she's his little girl and not Alec's. And that's what helps Mary the most: knowing that he cares about Ember too and that he's willing to lend his heart to both of them whenever they need it.
She stops thinking so much about what she's doing with him and lets her heart take control because she really needs someone to care for her and to let her know that she's not as unlovable as she thinks she is.
Harry doesn't know what kind of reaction that he was expecting, but he's pleasantly surprised as Mary closes the space between them and wraps her arms around him, holding him tightly and burying her face in his neck.
"You're so sweet."
Harry chuckles lightly and rubs small circles on her back, "So are you, love. So are you."
A choked laugh passes her lips as she closes her eyes and breathes in the scent of his fading cologne. And it's sad because that's really the nicest thing that anyone has said to her in a while, even when Alec was trying he didn't really compliment her or anything. That one little compliment makes her feel so much better.
They sit in silence for a moment before Mary asks softly, her head still in the crook of his shoulder, "Will you talk to her? It'll help so much and she really likes you, more than Alec I think, and that says something."
Harry smiles and hugs her a little tighter, "Of course I will. If it counts, I really like her too. Not in a creepy way though."
This makes Mary laugh and she's finally calmed down enough to compose herself. She relaxes her arms and pulls away from his embrace, only to smile at him and wipe her eyes. "You didn't have to clarify that."
Harry returns her soft smile and shrugs his shoulders, he knows that he didn't have to clarify what he meant but he did it because he knew that it would make her laugh and lift her spirits.
They sit there and stare at each other for a good minute or so before Harry takes her hands in his and speaks softly, "Since Ember's still asleep, why don't you take a shower and relax a little bit and I'll go downstairs and start making breakfast. Is that okay?"
He's not entirely sure that she wants him to stick around, so he asks to clarify that that's what she wants. He doesn't want to get in the way or make things harder for her, he just wants to help and pick up the pieces of her beautiful broken heart.
Mary sniffles and tucks the hair that's been hiding the corners of her face behind her ears, "That's more than okay. I'll show you where everything is."
She smiles as she carefully gets out of the bed and grabs his hand to lead him into the kitchen. At some point during the night, after she'd calmed down from crying, she changed into a nightshirt and lent Harry a pair of sweatpants that she wore when she was pregnant with Ember. They got a good laugh out of it because they're pretty much women's pregnancy pants and they actually look good on him.
Mary knows that she's pretty much half naked right now, braless and only in her underwear under a shirt that barely reaches her thighs, but she doesn't mind because she's comfortable and Harry makes her feel really good about herself when he stares at her a little too long and in the wrong places.
Harry tries to keep his eyes on her back and not the gentle sway of her hips when she walks or how her underwear rides up and shows off quite a bit of her bottom. But it's really hard because he likes her so much and it's right in front of him.
Mary knows that he's looking, she can feel his stare on her behind and she knows that he's trying to be a gentleman and not look. She's feeling a little better now that she's stopped crying and now that she's finally started to really end things with Alec, and a small smile rises to her lips as they walk down the stairs and into the kitchen.
It's so light downstairs, all the curtains are open and the space feels warm and inviting with Harry by her side instead of cold and foreign like it was the night before. Mary points to cabinets and drawers as she names what he can find in them. She leaves out the fridge because he's a grown man and can figure that one out for himself.
Mary turns around and lets out a soft 'oh' because she hadn't realized how close he was and she's pretty much walked right into him. She feels like she's incredibly short as she looks up at him and the soft smile that he wears on his lips as he looks at her.
Harry's tall, but he's not a giant and it's been a while since she's seen him and, for the moment, he looks like a skyscraper.
"Hi."
She feels like a little kid as she says it, but she doesn't really know what else to say because the light's catching in his eyes and making them sparkle and they're such a rich and captivating shade of green that she's a little star struck.
The corners of his lips pull up and engage his smile a bit more, his dimples making a shy appearance at the action. "Hello."
Mary's cheeks redden and her eyes drift to their bare feet on the tile, the red polish on her toenails catching her attention because she's not really ready to take him out of that friend zone just yet and if he keeps looking at her like that she might just kiss him.
She lets her gaze linger on their feet for a moment before she's collected herself enough to look at him. Harry's grinning and she can't help but to smile back as she shifts on her feet a little awkwardly, "I'm gonna go take a shower."
Harry bites his lip for the briefest of moments as he nods and keeps his eyes on her face because he can see things now and he doesn't want to go to that inappropriate place in his head.
Mary surprises him and stands up to kiss his cheek. She doesn't say anything else and walks out of the kitchen, leaving him with heated cheeks and a boyish grin on his lips.
He starts fumbling around the kitchen as he sets to work making breakfast, and Mary strips down and turns on the shower. She's not really sure how she's feeling right now because all of her feelings are sort of blending together and creating this huge mess.
The water is loud, but it doesn't drown out her thoughts and she's trying her best to come up with a speech for Ember that will make sense and not completely break her little heart. She doesn't want to cry again, but she knows that she's going to as soon as she sees her little girl cry.
And Harry, oh he's so sweet. If he wasn't in her life, she isn't sure what she would've done last night when she finally hit her breaking point. Hell, she doesn't know if she would've been able to tell Alec what she wanted to this morning if he wasn't there to help reinforce her decision.
She goes through the motions of her usual shower without really thinking about it and in another ten minutes she's waking Ember up to tell her that breakfast is almost ready. Ember's so cute as she rubs the sleep from her eyes and yawns and Mary feels a slight twinge in her chest thinking about the conversation that they're going to have after breakfast.
"Is daddy home?"
Mary smiles softly and shakes her head, "No, I'm sorry sweetie."
Ember pouts and twists her hands in her lap, "Can I stay in my pajamas today, mommy?"
She doesn't think that they'll be going out and doing anything today because of the news that she has to share with her, so this time Mary lets Ember stay in her pajamas. If she's going to break her heart, she might as well be comfortable.
"Of course you can, sweetie. Would you like to have a piggy back ride downstairs?"
Mary's thinking that she'll at least make up for the heartbreak by making her as happy as she can, now and after she tells her that her daddy won't be living with them anymore.
Ember wakes up a little faster at the mention of a piggy back ride and she practically jumps out of bed, "Yes, please!"
"Yes, ma'am!"
Mary bends turns around and bends her knees so that she's at a height where Ember can stand on the bed and climb on her shoulders. She's always loved piggy back rides and it's been a while since she's had one, so this is a nice little moment for them to bond like they used to when she was a teeny three-year-old.
Ember situates herself and giggles loudly as Mary runs out of the room and hurries down the stairs. She grips to her shoulders for dear life even though she knows that her mommy won't drop her because she's done this before.
Mary beams as she crouches so that Ember can safely get her footing on the ground again. Ember instantly runs in front of her and throws her arms around her. "I love you, mommy!"
She hugs her daughter a little tighter than normally because she's hurting and she knows that she's going to hurt her too. "I love you too Emmy, so, so much."
Ember knows that something's up because of the way that she's hugging her, this is how she hugs her when she's crying late at night and she pretends to have a bad dream to make sure that she isn't sad anymore.
When her mommy lets go, she turns around and bolts for the kitchen because she smells bacon and pancakes and she's starving. She stops dead in her tracks when she sees her teacher standing at the stove with a piece of bacon in his mouth.
He's in a pair of sweatpants that she's seen her mommy in and a white t-shirt. His hair's a mess and it's all over the place and he's humming a song that she doesn't recognize under his breath.
Ember's incredibly confused because her teacher is in her house and making breakfast, but she's really happy because she loves her teacher, he's so nice to her and she thinks of him as her daddy too because he's nicer than her daddy and she interacts with him so much more.
"Mr. Styles!"
She runs to him and he immediately stops what he's doing to crouch down and meet her halfway for a hug. Ember's such a sweet little girl and he loves her like she's his own because he's spent so much extra time with her because of her mother's work schedule.
"Ember! How are you?"
Ember grins and nearly rocks on her heels as he lets her go, "I'm good! Mommy gave me a piggy back ride!"
Harry's eyes flit to Mary as he smiles and pretends like he didn't hear her loud giggles and Mary's loud footsteps on the stairs. "She did!?"
Ember nods happily, "Yep!"
She hasn't asked him why he's there yet and he and Mary share a relieved look as she practically flies across the kitchen and up into a seat at the island. Mary walks into the kitchen much slower, her hands playing with the hem of the loose t-shirt that she's kept on but with much more coverage.
He knows that she wants to give Ember a nice breakfast first and he doesn't rush her at all because he understands where she's coming from. Breakfast is finished in another few minutes and Ember chirps away happily as she tells Harry about the plans for her birthday next weekend.
Mary's avoiding eye contact and staring at her plate with a slight pout because she knows that she has to do this today. Somewhere between descriptions of the decorations that she wants and the classmates she wants to invite, Harry tells her that she can call him Harry while they're out of school and Ember practically glows because she knows that it's special when adults tell a kid that they can call them by their first name and she knows that it means he'll be around with her mommy more often.
Harry takes care of the dishes when they're all done and Mary takes Ember into the living room to talk to her about what's going on between her and Alec. She has her sit on the couch and she sits down cross-legged beside her so that she can hold her hands as she tells her.
"Emmy, I need to talk to you about something."
Ember looks up at her mommy with slightly wide and confused eyes because she knows that something is going on by the sad look on her mommy's face. "What is it mommy?"
Mary sighs and glances over at Harry in the kitchen for a moment before gathering her nerves and just getting it over with, ripping off the band aid and waiting for the burn. "Your daddy and I haven't been getting along for a long time and it's time for daddy to go away. He doesn't love mommy like he should and it isn't good like that, sweetie. It hurts me and it hurts you and that's not what I want for you. Daddy won't be coming home anymore, I'm so sorry sweetie. I'm so, so sorry."
It breaks her heart when the tears start to form in Ember's pretty blue eyes and her lips start to tremble, "Daddy doesn't love you?"
She doesn't understand how her daddy couldn't love her mommy anymore because her mommy is the best person in the whole wide world and she loves her so much. Mommy's and daddy's are supposed to love each other and she doesn't want to believe that something went wrong and they aren't like they're supposed to be.
Mary shakes her head and doesn't even try to hide her tears because she wants Ember to know that she's not the only one that's upset and that it's okay to be upset right now. "No sweetie, he's found somebody else."
"B-but he's supposed to love you, mommy."
She nods and rolls her lips in for a moment because she hates doing this, hates having to tell her sweet little girl that her daddy just doesn't love her anymore and that he made her do this. "I know sweetie, but sometimes that doesn't work and your daddy and I just didn't work. I tried so hard to make it work, but I couldn't. I'm so sorry, Emmy."
Ember doesn't like seeing her mommy like this, but she can't help her this time because she feels like everything is broken. She knows that this means her daddy won't be around anymore and she's sad because she likes it when he's around because he's her daddy and she loves him, even if he isn't around too often.
She practically throws herself into Mary's arms and hugs her tightly as she mumbles into her shirt, "Does daddy still love me?"
Mary closes her eyes and nods because she knows that he still loves their sweet little girl because he asked if he could still see her and if he could say goodbye. "Yes, daddy still loves you, Emmy. He loves you very much."
"W-will I still see him?"
Mary holds her a little tighter, "If you want to, yes, you can still see him."
They stay like that for a while before they each calm down. Ember's sniffling and Mary's wiping her eyes when Harry steps in with her favorite stuffed elephant, Miss Elly.
He smiles at her softly and crouches down in front of her with his hand outstretched with Miss Elly. "I thought you might want her, she looked quite lonely upstairs."
Ember wipes her eyes and smiles as she takes Miss Elly and pulls her close to her chest. Mary doesn't know how he knows that Miss Elly is her favorite, but it means everything to her that he's done that for her daughter.
"I know that you're upset right now, but you're kind, you're smart, and you're strong and you'll be okay, Ember. The same thing happened to me when I was your age and I know that it hurts and that you think no one will understand what you feel like, but I do and I want you to know that you can always talk to me. Your mommy is such a wonderful person and you're just like her and I know that you two will be alright. And, you've got Miss Elly here to keep you company. She's quite nice, I really like her."
Ember hugs Miss Elly a little closer and drops her eyes to the floor because she's still sad and she doesn't really know what to do. "Miss Elly doesn't like it when I'm sad."
Harry smiles at her softly because he knows that she's not sure about being okay without her daddy around, "Your mommy and I don't either. It'll be okay Ember, and if it's not I'll buy you ice cream and take you to the park every Saturday until it is."
The mention of ice cream and the park perks her up a little bit and her eyes meet his with a little more sparkle, "Really?"
Mary's looking at him with a warm smile and soft eyes and he smiles at Ember as he sticks out his pinky, "Really. Pinkie promise?"
Ember perks up and sticks out her pinky to loop it with his, "Pinky promise."
He stays for a while and plays Princess, Hide and Seek, and he colors with Ember for hours. They watch a movie of her choice and all the while Mary is wondering how she's gotten lucky enough to meet a man like him.
The day started off sad, but most of that sadness is forgotten through the day and Ember falls asleep around eight thirty with a smile on her face. Mary still feels it, but she's felt it for a while and she knows that she's going to feel it for a while longer because it's a big change and it's a change that means a lot to her.
Harry's grabbing his coat and getting ready to head home and Mary really doesn't want him to go, but she can't keep him here forever because he's got a life too.
She smiles at him softly as he shrugs his shoulders so that his arms fit snugly in his sleeves, "Thank you so much for everything that you've done, today and otherwise. It means so much to me and I just want you to know that I really, really appreciate you and everything that you do."
Harry pushes his hair out of his eyes and smiles fondly at her, "You say thank you too much."
Mary blushes and averts her eyes to his lips because that's a little more distracting and she always feels like he's looking into her soul when he looks her in the eyes. "I know."
Her hair is falling into her eyes and he gently tucks it behind her ear, "You can call me or text me when you need me. I'll always answer."
She can't keep her eyes away for very long and she's lost in the rich color of his pretty green irises in moments. Harry's a little too caught up in her himself and he's leaning in to kiss her goodnight without really thinking about it. His nose brushes hers and she stops breathing for a moment.
Mary wants this, she really does, but it still doesn't feel right to her because she's still married right now and she's not completely over Alec yet. Harry's lips brush hers ever so slightly and she hates herself for pushing him away.
He tries not to show his disappointment because he's been pushed away from another kiss, but she knows that it's there and she feels really bad because it seems like she just keeps doing this to him over and over again.
Mary closes her eyes and sighs as she decides on what to say. When she opens them again, Harry's wearing a soft smile and he's looking at her like she's a constellation.
"I want to kiss you, I really do, but I'm still married right now and I'm just not completely over him yet. I'm sorry that I keep doing this to you, I don't mean to."
Harry nods because he understands, it's who she is and he loves that about her. "It's alright, Mary. I'm not offended."
She shifts on her feet awkwardly because she doesn't know what to say now that she's just turned him down again after he's been so sweet to her and Ember.
"Spoil Ember and yourself tomorrow, you both need it. I'll text you after I make it home, goodnight, Mary."
He leans in and kisses her cheek and she smiles as the blood rises to her cheeks, "Goodnight, Harry."
He leaves and she leans against the door with her hand on her cheek. She's not sure about what's going to happen between her and Alec once the divorce process starts, but she knows that she's making a good decision and that Harry's good for her: he makes her happy.
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