˚♡ ⋆｡˚

CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE
staring at the sun.
season three, episode eight.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Billie clutched her coffee cup on one hand and her bag on the other as she made her way into the hospital alongside Edward, who mimicked her position by holding his own caffeinated beverage and briefcase. The girl chatted eagerly and he dedicated himself to hear her passionate words, sipping from his coffee in short intervals.

"It has been the craziest two months of my life, even before I almost died." Billie laughed about a certain topic that wasn't exactly amusing, but her sense of humor twisted it around for her to find it extremely funny. "I mean, you wouldn't believe how much I've lost and gained."

"Oh, trust me, I would. I was there." Edward nudged her playfully as they made their way into the hospital through the automatic doors. "How's therapy going?"

"As good as it can be. Honestly, I hate it, but I know it's working." She grinned cheekily, then paused. "Oh, hey, can I be on your service today? I don't feel like spending time with anybody I could possibly know."

Edward frowned, "You know me."

"Yeah, but we met, like, three months ago. This people, I've known them for two years, even more. It's a hell of a lot of time to spend with someone, considering the fact that we're working together one hundred hours a week."

"I'd love you on my service, but I think that's up to your resident."

Billie grumbled like a little kid, remembering that, despite the many exceptions she was recently getting, she was still a person of no authority in this place. Edward laughed at her before clicking the button to call the elevator.

"What are you thinking to go into?" He arched an eyebrow.

"Neuro. My mom did." Billie grinned. "She was awesome."

"I've no doubt of that."

The elevator received them empty except for one person, who stood in the middle of the canned space and who also happened to be George O'Malley. He already wore his scrubs and stood with his hands on his hip, tapping his foot on the floor nervously, but when he saw Billie and her friend enter the elevator, he sighed in relief.

"Billie! I've been looking everywhere for you," he said.

"I just got here." The girl shrugged. "Oh, hey, I'm sorry about your dad. I heard he got admitted. How is he?"

"That's exactly what I wanted to talk to you about." George nodded, glancing over Billie's shoulder at Edward, who pretended not to hear as he sipped from his coffee. George lowered his voice. "Dr. Bailey is letting me choose an intern to be on my father's case. You know, since she won't let me be on it because I'm a family member. Honestly, I think that's total crap, but I'm not gonna-"

"Georgie," Billie cut him off. "Straight to the point."

"Right, well. Will you be the intern on my father's case?" he asked straightforwardly.

Billie stayed silent for a second, adopting a much more serious shadow to her face, "You really want me to?"

"Yeah. I mean, you're smart, you're kind, you're funny, you're... you keep me grounded. It's just what my father needs. I also got Cristina with him, because she's Cristina, but honestly, I don't trust anyone else to take care of him other than you. You're just... you're perfect for the job." His eyes glimmered swiftly.

The girl's lips curved into a little smile and she nodded, "I'd love to, Georgie. Yes."

☆

Later that day, as Billie finished tossing on her scrub top with a few-minute delay in regards to the rest of her intern class, Izzie walked up to her. The brunette chose to ignore her at first, pretending not to hear the way she cleared her throat discreetly, but in the end, Izzie was standing too close and Billie could no longer stand all of her blonde hair.

"What do you want?" she deadpanned without looking into her eyes.

Izzie bit the corner of her lip, "Bailey told me to shadow you today."

Billie's movements froze. She turned around slowly to meet a very intimidated-looking Izzie, who simply shrank under Billie's imposing gaze. The girl arched an eyebrow.

"Uh, no." She shook her head simply, slamming her locker shut and proceeding to walk away. Izzie followed behind frantically.

"Wait, but I need to go with you!"

"Go find someone else to smother." Billie sighed. "Really, I'd hate to ruin that pretty little face of yours."

Izzie's running faltered a little at the threatening statement, but she kept chasing behind the intern regardless. In the end, due to Billie's lack of attention, the blonde grabbed her wrist and turned her around harshly.

"Hey!"

"Bailey assigned me to your service, so you're supposed to teach me. You're supposed to teach me how to be a better surgeon, since apparently, I'm such a shitty one to you." Izzie glared. "You wanna punish me? Fine, punish me. Just know that this is not what Denny would've wanted-"

"You do not get to speak to me about Denny or what he would've wanted," Billie said with an abnormally calm tone to her voice, striding towards her menacingly with her finger up high. Izzie took a step back. "What Denny would've wanted if you hadn't manipulated him into thinking otherwise would be for me to kick that little psychopathic ass of yours and send you straight to jail."

Izzie hesitated for a second, stone-faced, but on the inside, she'd always know Billie's words held truth. Much more truth than she would've wanted to.

"I'm sorry, Billie," Izzie whispered, taking a second to assimilate the situation. "But you don't have to talk to me, do things with me, or so much as look in my direction. I just wanna work, please. You can go about your day, and I'll go about mine-"

"Zip it," Billie cut her off, unable to stand the sound of her voice, and then stood quiet for a second, but finally sighed in defeat. "But I have my own set of rules too."

"What?"

"Rule number one, no talking unless you're talked to. Rule number two, not making any faces or expressions that could possibly interfere with my day. Rule number three, you follow me around and do as I say without a word. Rule number four, you so much as think about bending any of these rules, I'll have you reported immediately," she spat out. "Let's go."

☆

Billie tucked her hands into her pockets just as, alongside Alex and followed by Izzie under Bailey's orders, Mark saw them. She smiled widely; her light at the end of the tunnel, considering the fact that she was currently surrounded by two people that would always make her feel awkward.

"Ah, excellent. My invaluable intern, my favorite person, and..." Mark began, but his eyes landed on Izzie. "Is it 'bring a hot blonde to work' day? No one told me."

Billie's face fell, "You just became my least favorite person."

"Hey, what did I do!" Mark raised his hands up in innocence. "But seriously, who is this?"

"The crazy chick I told you about? You know, the that who killed Denny? Unfortunately, I get to hold her leash today." Billie smiled at the irony of the situation, although she was the only one, since Mark frowned in concern as soon as he heard the words.

"Which one of those cases do you need us on?" Alex asked in an attempt to interrupt their conversation, biting his tongue not to snap at Mark purely out of jealousy.

"It's a really tragic one. I found out just this morning that I have over two weeks worth of dry-cleaning that needs to be picked up, STAT," Mark said, handing Alex the ticket to the store. Billie snorted inwardly.

Alex smiled at him, but there was utter hatred in his eyes, "Cool. That's it?"

"We're like a well-oiled machine, you and me." Mark grinned. "I also need you to get me a sandwich from that pathetic excuse for a deli. You know the one I like, Karev. But go easy on the mayo this time. I think he's trying to kill me."

Billie laughed a little again just as Alex turned and made it his job to complete the tasks given. As soon as he was gone, she chuckled a little louder.

"I forgot torturing interns was your specialty. Apart from sleeping with nurses." Billie shook her head in fake disappointment as her and Mark began walking side by side, followed by a very restrained Izzie behind them. "Don't kill Alex, he's doing his best."

☆

"Okay, I have to know, are we going to be signing charts all day? 'Cause this is getting kinda boring," Billie said, as she messed around on the spinning chair behind the nurses station.

She had delegated the task that was supposed to be her own to Izzie, so now the blonde was the one signing off the papers, and instead, Billie was using this free time to mess around. However, her inner child usually became easily bored.

"Relax. Today's gonna be good." Mark smirked just as Alex approached them, carrying a dry cleaning bag and a delivery one with the attending's food in it. "There you are! What, did you go all the way to New York for my pastrami?"

"Extra spicy, extra lettuce, light on mayo." Alex smiled proudly as Mark checked into the bag, oblivious to Addison's presence behind him.

"Mark." The woman placed her hands on her hips scoldingly. "What are you doing?"

"Lunch," he said, taking out a small plastic wrapper with a pickle inside. "Want my pickle?"

Addison rolled her eyes, "Seattle Grace is a teaching hospital. Part of your job is to teach. Your interns aren't your slaves."

"Fine. No pickle for you."

"Hey, I want your pickle!" Billie exclaimed, reaching out her hands like a little child, yet painfully unaware of how dirty her comment sounded.

Mark smirked widely, "You can have my pickle any day."

Billie rolled her eyes and snatched the snack from his hands, glad to have received a treat. Mark laughed, but both of them were oblivious to Alex's death glare behind them, which burnt holes into the back of the attending's skull.

☆

"How you doing, Mr. Jeffries?" Mark walked into the patient room followed by Billie, Alex and Izzie.

Inside, a shirtless man with a bandage around his abdomen laid under the hospital duvet, "Oh, Frank's doing okay. He'd be doing a lot better if the twins were even."

Alex frowned, "Uh, twins?"

"Frank's new pecs," the patient answered.

"Who is Frank?" Billie squinted her eyes in suspicion at Mark's big smile.

"You're looking at him." Frank winked.

"Frank, these are interns. I'm supposed to be teaching them. Apparently, this is a teaching hospital." The attending sighed. "Then there's Billie, the crazy hot chick next to them. Billie?"

The girl snorted with the chart on hand, "Uh, Frank Jeffries is post-op day three from pectoral enhancement surgery. There was a slight complication when a seroma formed."

"And what is a seroma?"

"It's a-" Izzie began, but Billie raised a finger in front of her face, efficiently shutting her up.

"Build-up of blood and fluid under the skin," she finished.

"Excellent. That concludes today's teaching." He smiled. "A tube was inserted in Mr. Jeffries' chest to drain the excess fluid. Karev, I want you to monitor and check the tube for output and change his dressings. Dr. Stevens, you can leave Billie alone for a while and stay with Karev and... watch. Dr. Black, you're with me."

"Actually, Dr. Stevens is an excellent doctor," Alex interrupted, mostly because, in return for Billie and Mark's relationship, his ultimate goal was making his ex-girlfriend jealous. Billie arched an eyebrow.

"Actually, Dr. Stevens is not," she said, turning to Mark. "We going or what?"

☆

After a long morning where Mark invited Billie for breakfast, they charted together for a little more and finally almost made out in an on-call room, intern and attending walked together back into Frank's room for a follow-up, chatting trivially about nothing in particular. However, when they walked into the room, they were surprised to see Izzie fondling both Alex's and Frank's pectorals at the same time. The three of them froze at the new presences in the room.

"Okay, this? This is why I don't work with interns." Mark huffed, frozen in his spot.

Billie's eyebrows shot up in amusement, "You and me both, Mark. You and me both."

☆

That afternoon, the whole intern class sat on the gurneys against the walls of the tunnels. Billie sipped from her carton of apple juice as she went over Harold O'Malley's chart, getting informed before she actually started working on the case.

"I mean, why bother having a kid if you're only gonna see it on weekends and holidays? You might as well just get a cat." Meredith ranted about her patient, who seemed to be overly-attached to her nanny, but quite detached from her working mom.

"I talked to Burke. I think he's fine," George told Cristina under a completely unrelated topic. The girl looked up from her studies, shocked.

"You did what?"

Meredith frowned, "What's wrong with Burke?"

"Nothing's wrong with anybody," Cristina said wryly.

"You know he let her decannulate a heart this morning?" George arched an eyebrow.

Billie looked up from her chart in shock, "You decannulated a heart this morning? By yourself? Bitch."

"No, not by myself."

"Now she's lying about it." George pressed his lips together.

Alex and Izzie, who were sitting one next to the other as they shared a bag of chips, turned to each other with impressed looks, "Yang decannulated a heart. Why is Alex not surprised?"

"Izzie isn't either." The blonde shook her head. "Last week, Izzie was digging through crap. This week, she's fondling manboobs. No decannulating hearts for Izzie."

George frowned at Cristina, "Why aren't you bragging about decannulating a heart?"

"I didn't decannulate a heart," the woman in question answered, trying to focus on her studies but failing miserably due to the conversation happening around her.

"Izzie and Alex do not believe you!" the blonde chanted.

"Okay, what are you two doing?" Meredith asked with a tired look in their direction.

Izzie laughed, popping a chip into her mouth, "Izzie and Alex have a patient who speaks about himself in the third person."

"They thought it was annoying at first, but now they kinda like it." Alex smirked.

"Is it gonna stop soon?" Billie asked harshly, still holding residual remorse towards Alex for God knows what reason and an unmeasurable amount of hatred towards Izzie.

Cristina looked up with an arched eyebrow, noticing the girl's evident bad mood, "Wow, what happened?"

Billie slammed the chart shut and tossed her empty apple juice carton on the floor, glaring at Cristina. She jumped to her feet with the clipboard under her arm and walked away.

"My uncle died."

☆

After going up to Richard Webber's office holding Harold O'Malley's lab results, Billie and the Chief decided to notify George and then talk to his father. However, the former was pulled apart for an individual task of his own and George and Billie were left alone to break the news to the the family.

She walked into Mr. O'Malley's room accompanied by George, who followed close behind. His two brothers and father all turned towards them as soon as they heard them, oblivious to the fact that they were going to be the bearers of very bad news.

"We've been waiting here forever, where's the doctor?" Ronnie, one of George's brothers, said.

"Dr. Webber will be in in a couple minutes," he replied with bloodshot eyes.

"They don't tell you anything, huh? Not until you're a real doctor." Jerry laughed condescendingly.

George looked down and held back tears, "I am a real doctor, Ronny!" He paused, catching everyone's attention. "I'm just not dad's doctor."

Harold, noticing his bloodshot eyes, frowned, "What is it, Georgie?"

"Let's just wait for Dr. Webber."

Billie bit her tongue not to say anything out loud, but proceeded to take a step forward in George's direction and lower her voice, "Georgie, I think it's better that you talk to him."

"Did he say he was coming in?" he whispered back nervously in reference to Dr. Webber.

"No, he's coming in later. You should tell your dad."

"What's with the whispering?" Harold cut them both off from his spot on the bed.

Billie stayed quiet and looked at George in the hold for him to talk. However, he didn't and everybody started getting impatient: from his brothers, who gestured expectantly; to his father, who was frowning; to Billie, who grabbed George's hand to offer her support. She squeezed it reassuringly and the man finally gathered up enough courage to speak up a few words.

"The biopsy results were abnormal," he said.

"Is abnormal bad or just... different?" Harold looked at him confused. However, this time, his son didn't answer. "Georgie?"

Billie noticed the tears welling in his eyes. He gulped and blinked heavily, trying to rid the itch behind his lids. Finally, he turned to Billie with some sort of pleading tone to his features. The girl understood immediately and their laced fingers gave up on each other just so that she could take a step forward.

"Sir, you have cancer in your esophagus which has spread to your stomach," she said softly, voice shaky with the weight of her words. "We need to operate to remove it and you'll need to undergo chemotherapy and radiation. I am so sorry."

Everybody looked at her in shock and the air became thick with grievance. Billie hated being the bearer of bad news.

☆

Back in Frank Jeffries room, as Alex palpated his abdomen in order to make sure the tube was draining the excess blood and fluids under his skin, he decided to make some small talk, which was usually a rare quality on him, but this time, he just had one thing to say.

"Dude, I still can't believe you went through all of this for a chick."

"What, you never did anything crazy for love?" Frank frowned.

Alex paused unsurely, but sighed. "Not like this."

"You have a girlfriend?"

Again, the question was one Alex wished he didn't have to answer, so he simply said, "No."

"Dr. Stevens?" The man on the bed arched a playful eyebrow that stood suggestingly. "Frank can sense the vibes."

"No, not her." The man in question rolled his eyes.

"Oh, so Dr. Black," Frank said, and when Alex didn't answer, he smirked widely. However, the action was followed by a frown. "Wait, isn't she with Doctor Sloan?"

"No! She's single." Alex was quick to grimace in disgust at the thought of Billie and Mark dating, but he shook his head. "I'm not talking about this with you."

"She left you for another guy?"

"No."

"So she just left you?"

Alex stared straight head, face set like stone, as he refused to answer the question which's answer was obvious. He bit his tongue, but Frank's eyebrows shot up.

"Ooh, Frank's hit a nerve."

"It's more complicated than that," Alex said.

"Uncomplicate it then, man!" Frank continued as the intern adjusted the bandage around his torso. "Grand gestures is what I'm talking about. Be like Frank. Just figure out what she wants and make it happen. She'll forget all about the other guy, if there even is one. Trust Frank, Frank knows."

Alex shook his head, annoyed, "She's made it pretty clear what she wants. We're just... working it out right now. Taking some time, you know?"

The patient on the bed stayed quiet for a second, staring at Alex, whose jaw was clenched harshly. "Frank can tell you're still hung up on her, ya know?"

☆

That afternoon, as the radiologist made an echo on George's father's chest and Billie and Cristina, who had joined her later, updated the chart next to him, Harold placed his hand on the former's, causing her to stop her scribbling and look up with a smile.

"I thought the cancer was in my gut. What are we looking at my heart for?" he asked.

"Your EKG showed some abnormalities, Mr. O'Malley, so we just wanna make sure your heart's healthy enough to support you through surgery," Billie explained softly.

He smiled. "Please, call me Harold."

The girl nodded and grinned gently for a second before her gaze was back down on her scribbling. However, Harold laughed softly through his nose and spoke again.

"You're smart girls," he said, making both Billie and Cristina nod in unison with smiles up their faces. "George told me you were the best interns I could have on my case."

Billie looked up with a glint behind her eyes, "He said that?"

"He said you were the best interns in the hospital. Said you keep everyone on their toes, even him." Harold smiled very widely as if the words warmed his heart. Billie and Cristina reciprocated the grin, but the radiologist spoke up.

"Doctors, you should take a look at this."

The smile was still on both of their faces as they glanced at each other worriedly, having a conversation that could only be read in their eyes. Billie put down her chart and both interns proceeded to surround the bed in order to take a look at the screen. The radiologist turned the monitor away from the patient and allowed the girls to click on the multiple images. They tried their best for their smiles not to falter when they realized what they were seeing.

"Okay." Billie nodded, but the worry grew big behind her words.

☆

Billie sat under the OR board with George's hand on hers. Her knees were bent in front of her whereas he sat cross-legged, almost stiff in his spot. The news had just been broken down to him that his father's aorta was leaking, which meant that his heart wouldn't be able to sustain the cancer surgery unless it was fixed first. Now, Billie didn't know what else to do to help him other than just being there.

George held her hand with strength, prompting her to not let go. She didn't.

"I'm sorry, George," she said after a while, letting out a sigh near the end. She tossed her head back against the wall. "I'm sorry things are so fucked up. Your father doesn't deserve this. You don't deserve this."

The man stayed quiet, unable to answer to her words. Billie simply stared at his side profile and silently felt all his pain, hoping that it would somehow take the load of his shoulders. She hated not being able to help him.

"Yeah, life is fucked up." George laughed humorlessly, almost devoid of any emotions. "My dad gets cancer, my brother's just won't listen, Callie slept with Sloan... I just can't deal with any of this right now."

Billie's head shot in his direction at the mention of a particular something, "Callie and Mark slept together?"

"Yeah."

"Oh." She frowned, unsure how she felt about the topic, but trying her best to chug it back down because she knew it was not the right time. "That sucks."

"Well... life is fucked up, right?" George turned towards her, giving space for Billie to see the redness that coated the whites in his eyes.

She felt her heart sinking and squeezed his hand reassuringly, hoping he would somehow feel the support she was trying to transmit.

"You wanna go get a drink later tonight? Maybe take our minds off all of this?" she suggested.

"Sorry, Bil." He shook his head. "I'm gonna stay here and watch my dad. I think that'll be for the best."

Billie nodded understandingly, "Well, I'll be at Joe's if you need me. Right across the street."

They smiled at each other longingly.

☆

That night, Billie arrived at Joe's bar with her bag on hand. She embraced the warmth of the pub that juxtaposed against the cold night air and then scanned her eyes all over the crowded place, from the booths on the right to the tables on the left, and finally, to the bar, where a particular someone sat.

She couldn't help it, but when she saw Alex, her face lit up into a smile. It was a habit Billie had acquired with the brief period of time in which the two had dated; the one where the sole sight of him would infect her with an odd sense of happiness, like everything was where it was supposed to even when nothing really was where it was supposed to. Especially now, with George's father's cancer, Denny's death, Izzie's existence, and the mere fact that Alex and Billie were no longer a couple who could afford the simple action of smiling whenever the other one walked into the room. It was just something that couldn't happen anymore.

So Billie's smile faded. She cleared her throat awkwardly, hoping nobody was paying enough attention to have noticed, and then made her way to the bar. Discreetly, she sat on the stool by Alex and raised her hand at Joe, who came up to her to take her order.

"A beer, please."

Alex's eyes settled on her but Billie pretended to pay no mind, stripping her coat and hanging it on the backrest of her seat along with her bag. In the end, she was left wearing a simple long-sleeved plaid shirt, which she had rolled up to her elbows in the seek to relieve her claustrophobia. Alex glanced her up and down, knowing.

"Hey," he said.

Billie finally turned and smiled briefly, just as Joe placed a tall glass of beer in front of her. "Hi."

"You dropped Frank's case. I thought I'd get to see you again." His voice trailed off near the end in realization of what he had just said and he cleared his throat awkwardly, hoping Billie didn't take it too seriously.

"You did?" She frowned, dragging the rim of her beer glass to her lips and taking a short swig out of it. Alex shrugged. "I got put on George's father's case. I had to be there for him."

"Oh," he said simply, painfully aware of the fact that he was no longer involved in her life, therefore he had no idea what the status quo on her relationship with George currently was.

They stayed quiet, each drinking their own drinks and not daring to say anything else. Alex cracked a few peanuts and popped them into his mouth awkwardly until he finally pulled himself together and looked at the woman sitting next to him.

"So, uh... how was your- your day?" he asked.

"My day was... weirdly good." Billie shrugged, cracking a peanut herself and then sliding it into her mouth.

Alex hated knowing she was okay without him, but he smiled regardless.

"That's nice," Alex said, but there was a long pause before he managed to spit out his following words. "Billie, I'm sorry."

"What for?"

"I kissed Izzie."

Billie's head shot in his direction, eyebrows tugging inwards. "You- You did?"

"Yeah. But we're not a thing though, she said she's not... she's not ready. So there's that." Alex sipped from his own beer briefly, then turned to Billie. "I can tell you that, right? It's okay?"

Downplaying it, Billie was disappointed. In reality, she was fucking heartbroken.

"Sure," she whispered.

But Alex knew it wasn't, so he kept quiet.