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CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE
wishin' and hopin'.
season three, episode fourteen.

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Bailey and Billie stood in front of said clinic, which had been ultimately baptized as the Denny Duquette Memorial Clinic. Their arms were crossed over their chests and they stared at their masterpiece proudly.

"Would you look at that?" Billie smirked widely. "Six days. Five million dollars."

"And we're open for business," the resident finished, then glanced over at her intern. "You made this possible, Black."

"It was your idea," she said in retaliation. "We made this possible."

"Damn right we did."

Billie stared at the opening clinic for one more second. "I think Denny would be proud."

"Denny would be a hell of a lot more than just proud." Bailey smiled at her. "We did this."

"We did this." The younger girl nodded and then, they proceeded to fist-bump.

☆

Later that day, Dr. Burke and Billie ran out to the ambulance station, where one of the vehicles was pulling up. The backdoors were opened to reveal Meredith sitting by her mother, who laid on the gurney, fully conscious.

"She had some external chest pain," Meredith informed.

"Chest pain and syncope. My pulse was in the two hundreds, but the rate has resolved on its own," Ellis deadpanned.

Burke and Billie looked at her in shock as the latter helped Meredith out of the ambulance. They all stared at each other.

"She's completely lucid," the blonde stated.

"She's what?"

"She's aware. She's herself again."

Billie and Burke glanced at each other in confusion and then proceeded to follow the gurney into the hospital. Ellis looked around and her eyes widened tenfold.

"Oh, my God, is this...?" she trailed off. "Are we in Seattle Grace?"

"Yes, mom, this is where I'm doing my residency," Meredith clarified.

"Your daughter is one of our finest interns. Following in your very big footsteps." Burke smiled politely.

"Do you know Richard Webber? Is he still a doctor here?"

"What, the Chief?"

Ellis' jaw fell open. "Richard Webber is the Chief? Of surgery?"

Burke glanced at Meredith over his shoulder and the blonde simply limited herself to give him an apologetic smile. Then, she glanced at Billie, whose lip twitched downwards.

"Family drama, much?"

☆

Billie opened the double door to the clinic dramatically, making herself present in a room where Alex, Izzie, Cristina, Bailey, Mark and Webber were already shuffling around. First, Alex and Cristina were searching the racks for nothing in particular, mostly just snooping around; meanwhile, Mark and Webber eyed their surroundings, inspecting the space in awe; finally and for some apparent reason, Bailey stood by the counter next to Izzie, who stared at the door without even blinking.

"What the hell's wrong with her?" Billie asked Bailey, gesturing with her head towards the blonde.

"She's watching the door," the resident answered.

"Uh... okay?" She grimaced in disgust towards Izzie, but then shook her head. "Anyway, uh, as the co-owner of this place, I don't have that much free time right now so I was wondering, can I not work here today? I need to be upstairs."

"Of course, Black. Your money, your rules."

Billie smiled triumphantly. "I was thinking though, since I won't be here, we have to have someone who'll run the clinic, huh?" she said, then patted Izzie on the back maybe a little too harsh. "Isobel! What do you say?"

"Huh?" The blonde frowned in shock. "You want me to run the Denny Duquette Memorial Clinic that you paid five million dollars to build?"

"I think it's a good idea." Billie smiled devilishly with the ultimate purpose to make Izzie feel unwelcome.

"I like it. Stevens, you're on duty." Bailey nodded.

It took Izzie a second to process the new information, but she was soon distracted by the sight of someone coming through the doors. Her expression morphed from horrified to excited in record time.

"Someone's coming!" she announced, making everybody turn towards the double doors. However, it was George and Callie who came in instead. "Damn it!"

"O'Malley, welcome back. You're late," Bailey greeted.

The man in question didn't say anything. Instead, he just stood by Callie, smiling and weirdly concentrated on nothing in particular. Billie and Webber analyzed him.

"You good?" The former arched an eyebrow.

"Is O'Malley alright?" the Chief asked.

George grabbed Callie's hand, "We got married in Vegas!" Everybody turned in shock. "We're married!"

There was an awkward silence. Everybody stared at the newlyweds with amused smiles upon their faces.

"Dude." Alex laughed. "She's Callie O'Malley."

☆

"Well, that was fast." Billie walked up to Callie with a smile, pulling her in for a quick hug. "Congratulations, Callie."

"Thanks. I know it's rushed, but he got down on one knee and gave me those puppy eyes he knows I love. I can't resist the puppy eyes, and I just-" Callie breathed in with a look of longing. "It feels right, you know?"

"As long as you two are happy, that's all that matters." Billie smiled widely.

Just then, George walked up to them, followed along by Izzie, who didn't seem exactly comfortable with the news. The brunette arched a condescending eyebrow at her.

"Show them the ring," George chanted at Callie.

The bride smiled widely and reached out her hand for Izzie and Billie to see. The latter analyzed the piece of jewelry first and pouted, enchanted.

"It's beautiful, you guys." She smiled.

The next one to look was Izzie. "Aw, that's so great. Tiny diamonds are great because you know no one will ever try to steal it."

Everybody's face fell, especially Billie's, who glared the ever-loving life out of Izzie. "Out, now."

Izzie did as so, realizing her mistake and gulping audibly, then proceeding to move further away from them. Billie immediately turned to George and Callie and apologized for the blonde's lack of manners, but they just waved her off.

"Okay, that's it. Yang, Black, Burke needs you two in Cardio. O'Malley, the Chief has a surgical patient coming into the pit. Stevens, Karev, go find me some patients. I don't care where you get them, just get them," Bailey demanded.

Everybody immediately dispersed to go complete said task, but before Billie could get past the double doors, Alex came up behind her and stopped her. "Hey, Bil."

"Yeah?" she replied distractedly, slightly nervous about Alex and Izzie being left alone in the clinic, together.

"Congratulations on the clinic. I'm... I'm surprised, really. You did a good job," Alex said with a smile.

Billie's grin widened until her whole set of teeth were on display, showcasing two dimples that popped on her cheeks. "Thanks, Alex."

"Yeah." He nodded back with a small lopsided grin.

☆

Billie was doing an echo on Ellis Grey, not noticing her intent eyes on her, when the woman spoke.

"You and Meredith are good friends," she said. "I can tell. 'Cause you're afraid to look at me. As if I might ask you some personal question about her and you'll accidentally slip. But you don't do anything accidentally, do you?"

Billie didn't know whether to take it as a compliment or as mean judgement, so she simply gave her a little smile, trying to pretend she wasn't in front of her biggest idol, her best friend's mother, and her mother's best friend. God, things were confusing.

"Has Meredith chosen a specialty?" Ellis asked.

"That's a personal question?"

"For surgeons, it's the most personal question you can ask. Tells you who they are," she said.

"My mother would wanna know whether I had a boyfriend." Billie laughed in reminiscence, knowing Ivory would've more than likely wanted to gossip on her daughter's life before actually asking her about the job.

"Your mother sounds like a frivolous woman," Ellis said.

Billie swallowed thickly. She wasn't going to tell her who her mother really was, but hearing her say those words made her start thinking whether Ellis would or wouldn't remember Ivory. It was an unanswered question, so she changed the topic.

"If I chose neurosurgery, what would that say about me?" she asked.

Ellis sighed, "Neurosurgeons are predominantly investigative. They are inquisitive and curious, often the kind to spend more time alone with their thoughts rather than with other people. They also tend to be realistic and arrogant, but well, all neurosurgeon requires of a little arrogance to get through with the job."

Billie smiled softly. "You're good."

"I know." Ellis nodded. "Speaking of which, Meredith says I'm part of an Alzheimer's research study. I want a neuro consult with the doctor who put me in the trial."

☆

"I need to lay down." George groaned as he entered the clinic, proceeding to ran up to one of the empty beds and tossing himself onto it. "I'm sick, shaky and sweaty. My mouth is dry and my body aches."

"Uh, Karev," Bailey called out, seemingly tired at the mishaps of her interns. "Replace O'Malley in the OR."

☆

Billie walked into the scrub room of Webber's OR after getting paged to assist with his surgery. The Chief was supposed to be operating on Marina Wagner, a patient with colon cancer. However, as Billie placed her mask and grabbed one of the soap bars in order to start scrubbing in, she looked up only to find that there was no one actually operating.

In fact, the entire OR had collapsed, including Webber, Alex, and all scrub nurses.

☆

All of the people that had fallen unconscious during the surgery were wheeled out in stretchers and placed on a full dose of oxygen. Their gurneys were lined up against the walls of the hallway and people were moving around constantly; amongst them, Billie.

She ran down the hallway and analyzed the face of all the infected people that were laying on gurneys, looking for a certain someone.

"Alex!" she called out once she saw him laying on one of the stretchers. She let out a shaky breath of relief once she realized he was okay.

The man in question was semi-conscious, almost delirious, with his scrub cap still on and an oxygen mask over his nose and mouth. Billie cupped his cheeks and looked at him in concern.

"Thank God you're okay," she said breathily.

"Hey," he panted out, opening his eyes very slightly in order to look at her. "Billie."

"Okay, okay. I'm here. The patient's blood is toxic and you were exposed to it," she explained. "But your BP's stabilized and your oxygen levels are coming up. You should be okay."

Alex nodded very slowly, as if he didn't have the inner strength to do anything else. Despite there being no more conversation, Billie looked at him for a little longer with tears welled upon her waterlines and pressed her forehead against his, closing her eyes briefly.

☆

"What's going on?" Billie asked as her, Izzie and Cristina sat next to Meredith on the OR gallery.

Downstairs, Burke and Derek were operating on Marina Wagner, the patient with toxic blood, wearing airtight suits that would shield them from the toxins for a limited amount of time, depending on how much oxygen they had left on their tanks. Billie's heart was still on her throat with worry.

Next to them, standing next to the intercoms, Webber and Mark spoke. The former gave Burke and Derek instructions on how to proceed since none of them were specialists on general surgery.

"The anaesthesiologist didn't have time to drop an NG tube, so now they have to place one and decompress and repack her intestines and close. And they're about to run out of air," Meredith explained.

"Derek's in there?" Billie breathed out, knowing she wasn't able to take much more worry for the day. She'd always hated caring so much about people.

"Yeah," she breathed out.

"Preston," Webber called through the intercom. "You'll need to milk the bowl to get out the excess fluid. Pack her and wrap her and get her stable for transport."

The doctors down in the OR did as said.

"How's George?" Meredith asked, knowing the man in question had been the first to pass out after getting a blood sample from Marina.

"Medically, he's fine," Izzie said. "Emotionally, he's a little stunted. You don't marry the rebound girl, am I right?"

Billie was too worried to even care about her rude comment. She simply bit her nail anxiously and breathed heavily in concern.

"You don't marry anyone on a whim," Cristina corrected.

"He needs our support."

"He doesn't need us. He's got his Vegas show wife," Izzie mocked.

The girls laughed, excluding Billie, who craned her neck in order to get better view of the OR. Down there, Derek and Burke seemed to have started becoming sluggish with their movements, which only caused the girl's body to stiffen up.

"Chief, they're at thirty-two minutes. You gotta pull them out," Mark said worriedly.

Webber spoke through the intercom. "How you doing on air?"

It took a second for Burke and Derek to answer. They glanced at each other, seeming very groggy by then, before the cardiothoracic surgeon spoke.

"I'm out."

"You go. I'll wrap it," Derek said breathlessly.

"Alone? No, you can't." Burke shook his head.

He let out a cough and stumbled a bit, falling to the floor unconscious and causing everybody in the gallery to jump to their feet. Derek called his name and surrounded the table to help him stand up, but as he tried lifting him, he passed out too.

"Well," Billie said, mind blank. "That's not good."

☆

"Okay, damage control," Webber demanded as him, Mark, Cristina, Billie and Meredith stood in the scrub room.

Izzie, since she was still on probation, hadn't been allowed to help, much to the brunette's like. The three interns were getting ready to go into the OR and finish the work that the two attendings hadn't, and the idea was for them to hold their breaths for as long as they could in order not to be directly exposed to the toxins.

"We still have to pack her and wrap her so that she's stable for transport. We work in shifts. One doctor at a time. No one stays in for more than twenty seconds," the Chief explained.

He still held an oxygen mask to his nose and mouth in short intervals, trying to get his oxygen levels up ever since he'd passed out in his OR. Right outside of the scrub room, Derek and Burke were being wheeled over to the clinic to get taken care of.

Webber looked up at Mark. "Dr. Sloan, do you want to go first?"

"I'm not going in there," he said blankly.

Billie rolled her eyes. "Just grow a pair already, Mark."

"It would be irresponsible for the remaining healthy attending to expose himself to the neurotoxin. A neurotoxin whose long-term effects we're still unaware of. So I'm staying in here," he explained.

The three interns looked at each other in shock before Cristina was raising her hand up high, clearly in for the thrill and adrenaline.

"I can swim three lengths of my parents' pool underwater," she said.

"You're up, Dr. Yang." Webber nodded. "Let's get her masked."

The intern began shuffling around, getting Mark to place a mask and a pair of safety goggles on her which would be her main and only source of protection from the neurotoxin.

"Sloan, give her the lap pads. You're gonna wet them and pack the cavity." Webber demanded before the door was opening and Cristina was darting into the OR.

The remaining surgeons watched her work through the glass with desperation. Cristina wetted the lap pads hurriedly and proceeded to start working on the body. Webber walked up to the intercom microphone.

"If you feel faint, get out," he said. "Come on, Yang. Hurry."

Cristina finally finished her job and ran back into the scrub room, panting heavily. She tossed her mask and goggles away and dragged on a few sharp breathes.

"I- I packed the wound," she said. "I couldn't get... I couldn't wrap it..."

"Dr. Grey," Webber called out next.

Billie grabbed Cristina and helped her land securely on the floor against the wall, handing her the oxygen mask for her to breathe into and stabilize her ventilation. Meredith was up next, so Mark placed the mask and safety goggles on her.

"Remove the drape and secure the plastic along her sides. It's gotta be tight." Webber explained at the intern, who then took a very deep breath and ran into the room.

They watched her work rapidly through the glass, feeling their hearts beat really fast in frustration. Billie and Mark shared an uneasy look.

"Hurry. Come on, Grey. Come on!" Webber talked through the intercom.

Meredith, however, wasn't able to finish her work and had to run back into the scrub room. She removed her mask and goggles and finally took in a sharp intake of air, filling her lungs with new oxygen.

"I couldn't... it didn't... it twisted..." she panted out.

Webber huffed nervously. "Okay, Black. You're up. The seal needs to be as close to vacuum tight as possible. It'll inflate, and then you'll know it's secure. Be quick."

Billie nodded and walked up to Mark, who placed her mask and safety goggles. He then gave her shoulder a squeeze and looked at her reassuringly, to which she took a sharp intake of air and ran into the room, holding her breath.

She flipped over the sheet that Meredith had accidentally twisted while she was inside, then proceeded to wrap it around Marina's body as fast as she could. Billie held it securely and then palpated it in order to see if it inflated, but she was already starting to feel the effects of the neurotoxin seeping into her body.

She held her breath as long as she could, but she had already been inside for thirty seconds and her body was starting to feel increasingly lightweight. She squeezed her eyes shut briefly in order to try and soothe the blur in her vision.

Billie stood in the OR for ten more seconds before the seal began inflating, which was her cue for her to go. However, by that moment, her body felt like it was in a trance, almost gliding, and she could no longer see clearly. She ran towards the automatic door that opened with her step and, before she could make it inside, she collapsed and fell onto Mark's arms.

☆

Billie's first words when she opened her eyes and found herself laying on one of the clinic beds were: "My ass hurts."

Mark next to her laughed and placed the oxygen mask over her face and mouth. "Here."

"What happened?" Billie cleared her throat at the dryness of it, placing the mask over her face and delighting herself with the feeling of fresh, toxin-free oxygen filling her lungs.

"You tried to be the hero, as usual." Mark smiled. "You passed out."

"Why? I was there for, like, three seconds."

"Fifty-two, actually," he corrected, face hardening. "You shouldn't have done it, Bil. It was dangerous, you could've- God knows what could've happened to you."

Billie laughed, seeming almost a bit stoned. "Says the one who wasn't man enough to go in there."

"Hey!" He frowned at her, causing her to laugh. "I'm serious though. Don't risk it like that."

"I had to wait for the damn thing to inflate. It's not my fault it took so long." She rolled her eyes, placing the mask on her face again and breathing in the oxygen that felt like heaven going down her throat in comparison to what she had recently experienced.

Mark nodded with a small smile and placed his hand on her hair briefly, stroking her with delicacy before he stood up to plant a kiss to her forehead. Billie looked up his towering figure longingly.

"I have to go check on my patient. I'll be back, okay?" he said.

"Okay," she answered.

"Okay." Mark smiled before he turned on his heel and left the room, leaving Billie on her own.

She closed her eyes and inhaled the fresh air coming in through the oxygen mask, unaware of how long she remained in that position before she was fit to peel her eyes back open. By the time she did, she noticed Edward stood by her bed.

"Hey," she said with a small smile in greeting.

"I thought you were asleep. It was cute." He laughed.

Billie giggled tiredly before she frowned. "I haven't seen you all day, where have you been?"

"Uh..." he hesitated, looking around and proceeding to sit on the chair Mark was previously on. He leant forward. "I was at the VMGS."

"Virginia Mason General Surgery? Why? A patient?" she asked obliviously.

Edward looked down briefly, then back up at her eyes. "A job offer, actually."

Billie remained silent for a second. She didn't quite catch his words, not understanding the full meaning of them; not because she couldn't, but because she didn't want to. Because if Edward had actually gotten a job offer from another hospital across the state and he wasn't just making one of his dumb jokes, then that meant he was leaving.

'Leaving' was not a term Billie got along with well.

"What?" She let out a laugh, but the lack of emotion to it caused it to fade away almost immediately. "Is this what you wanted to tell me?"

"Yes." Edward sighed deeply. "They offered me a position as head of cardiothoracic surgery. I couldn't not accept it."

"So you did accept it." Billie pursed her lips. "Right?"

"Yes." Edward nodded after a moment of hesitation.

The girl stayed quiet, stone-faced, and then swallowed thickly. "When are you leaving?"

"Tomorrow, I've already packed. Gotta take the ferry to Bainbridge Island and I'll start working Monday morning," he explained shortly.

Billie sighed in silence and then bit the inside of her cheek. She didn't know why it affected her so much and she didn't want to be selfish, so she drew the most real smile she could.

"I'm happy for you, Edward. I know how much you've been wanting to be head," she said, grabbing his hand and giving it a firm squeeze to ensure her presence by his side. Billie hesitated. "Can I... come with you? Tomorrow, can I be with you? Maybe get to know the hospital, in case I ever have the chance to go visit you."

His lugubrious features lightened up with a grin. "I'd love for you to join me."

"Okay." She nodded.

"Okay." He smiled.