147. He Helps You Patch Things Up With Your Dad
A/n: This one is for the people who are reading this who don't have a good relationship with their dad. I don't have a good relationship with my dad, I don't speak to him actually, but honestly, I wish that someday, when things get better, him and I can work things out. Anyways, please enjoy this imagine. Okay, without further ado, let's begin!
I felt frustrated as I sat in the dining room, on my laptop. I'm engaged to the singer and songwriter Shawn Mendes. I don't have a relationship with my dad, so my brother will be walking me down the aisle instead of my dad. I'm also supposed to have a last dance with my brother, and I felt frustrated as I looked for the right song. None of them seemed fitting for my brother and I. They were all father and daughter. I put my head in my hands and cried. Not because of the frustration, although that didn't help, but I was mostly crying because of my lack of a relationship with my dad.
"Hey, what's going on?" Shawn asked as he walked into the room. I got up and hugged him.
"Can you just hold me right now please? I just, I need your arms around me right now." I asked and said. I felt Shawn nod.
"Of course baby. We'll talk whenever you're ready to, okay?" He asked.
"Right now I just feel like crying." I said as Shawn rubbed my back.
"Then cry babe. It's just me, you can cry as much as you want, and when you're ready to talk, we'll sit down and talk." Shawn said. I nodded as I sobbed. I hadn't talked to my dad, like had a normal conversation without tension, and had a relationship with my dad in about four years. It was like all of the pain that I had felt since childhood, since he stopped being a good dad, was coming out in tears. After a few minutes of just standing there sobbing as Shawn held me, I pulled away from the hug.
"Can we sit down and talk now please?" I asked. Shawn nodded and I felt bad when I saw the worry in his eyes.
"Of course we can baby girl." Shawn said. We sat down and I looked at mine and Shawn's hands as we interlaced our fingers. As our skin touched, I felt electricity spark through me, yet I felt safe and warm at the same time.
"Um, I think that those tears were like, a build up of all of the pain that I've felt since I was little. I got really frustrated because I was trying to find a song that Thomas and I could dance to at the wedding, but all I could find were songs that were father daughter songs, not brother and sister songs." I said. Shawn pulled me into him so I was leaning on him.
"Oh honey. What can I do to help?" Shawn asked. I shrugged.
"I don't know. It's like, I want a relationship with my dad, but I don't know if he's changed or not." I said. Shawn kissed the top of my head and I looked up at him.
"Well, how about you reach out to him and try to work things out?" Shawn asked. I sat up and shook my head.
"No, because what if he hasn't changed and I just get hurt again?" I asked. Shawn put his hand to my cheek and rubbed the tears away with his thumb.
"Then I'll be right there to help you feel better." Shawn said. I leaned on him again and he held me and rubbed my back. I then sat up again and looked at him.
"I don't know. I don't know. I feel like when we have kids, I mean, how am I going to be able to keep his grandkids from him? How can I do that to him? But at the same time, what if he's the same way with our kids that he was with Thomas and I? I want to give him another chance, but I'm so scared of getting hurt again." I said. Shawn nodded.
"I know that you're scared, but I also know that you're a very brave woman, and you're very strong. In fact, you're the strongest woman I know. How about you give him another chance? I know that you've already given him a lot of chances, but, how about just one more?" Shawn asked. I thought for a moment.
"Can I think about it?" I asked. Shawn nodded.
"Absolutely. How about we talk about something else for the wedding tonight besides the last dance song?" Shawn asked. I was still holding his hand, and I squeezed it.
"I just want to spend time with you right now. Plus, I feel tired from crying." I said. Shawn looked at his watch.
"Well, how about you shut down your laptop and we'll go to bed?" Shawn asked. I nodded.
"Okay." I said. I got up and turned off my laptop. I then walked back over to Shawn and he stood up.
"Ready for bed my love?" Shawn asked. I nodded.
"Yeah." I said. Shawn held my hand and we went upstairs. We both got changed into pajamas and then got into bed. Shawn laid on his back and I put my head on his chest. I closed my eyes, feeling content listening to my soon to be husband's calming heartbeat.
"I love you Y/n. Good night." Shawn said. I wrapped my arms around and smiled.
"I love you too Shawn. Good night." I said. The next morning, when I woke up, Shawn was still asleep. I got out of bed and got dressed. I went downstairs and put on some music.
My dad passed his love of Bruce Springsteen onto me, and one of the father daughter dance songs that kept coming up was When You Need Me by Bruce Springsteen. I put it on as I thought about my dad, and then began to cry. I missed my dad. I wanted him in my life again, but I didn't want to get hurt again. I paused the music and dialed those oh so familiar numbers. The phone rang, and then I heard him.
"Y/n?" My dad asked.
"Hi dad." I said.
"Hey. How are you? Is everything okay?" He asked.
"Um, I'm okay. I was wondering if you wanted to come over to mine and Shawn's house today. Maybe you and I could talk about things. Does that sound good?" I asked as Shawn walked into the kitchen.
"Yeah, that um, excuse me. Sorry." My dad said. He was getting emotional, causing me to get emotional too.
"It's okay Dad." I said. Shawn's eyes widened when he heard me say dad.
"Um, yeah, that would be great if we could spend some time together. I would love to catch up with you and talk things over and get to know Shawn better." He said. I wiped my tears away and nodded.
"Okay. Do you want to come over for lunch?" I asked.
"Yeah, I'll be there at noon." He said.
"Okay. See you then." I said.
"Okay. I love you." My dad said. I squeezed my eyes shut as more tears fell.
"I love you too." I said. We hung up and I set the phone down. Shawn pulled me in for a hug.
"I'm so proud of you honey. Oh my gosh honey. When I met you, you didn't have a relationship with him and now you might get one!" Shawn said. I nodded as we hugged.
"Yes, but what if things go wrong and we don't get that relationship?" I asked.
"Everything will be okay my love, I promise." Shawn said. I nodded. Shawn made him and I breakfast. We sat down to eat.
"I feel like I can't eat. I feel like my stomach is in a knot." I said.
"That's okay baby girl. I'm not going to leave your side okay? I'll stick by you unless you want alone time with your dad, okay?" Shawn asked. I nodded as I picked at the pancakes that Shawn had made.
"Okay." I said. I then got up.
"What are you doing babe?" Shawn asked. I smiled at him.
"I want to give my soon to be husband a kiss." I said. Shawn smiled and backed his chair up a bit so I could sit on his lap.
"Then come give me a kiss." He said. I put my lips on his. I felt my heart race as if I had just ran a marathon, I felt butterflies erupt and fly around in my tummy, and I felt sparks shoot through me like fireworks. His kiss calmed me down, and I finished eating. We sat on the couch and cuddled until we heard the doorbell ring. I stood up.
"I got it." I said. I went to the door and opened it. My dad was standing there.
"Hi Y/n." He said. I opened the door some more to let him in.
"Hi Dad. Come on in." I said. He did and that's when I noticed that Shawn had come closer.
"Can I, um, can I give you a hug?" Dad asked. I nodded and we hugged. I held back tears as we hugged. We soon pulled away.
"Dad, you know my fiancé, Shawn Mendes." I said. They had met a few times before at family get togethers, but never really talked. Shawn knew the stories of my dad.
"Hi Y/d/n, nice to see you." Shawn said.
"Nice to see you too." Dad said.
"Do you, um, the last time that you were in this house, it belonged to Uncle Larry. Do you want a tour of the house? Shawn and I changed and added some things." I asked and said. My dad nodded.
"I would love that." Dad said. I held my hand out for Shawn to take. I needed him right now. We walked around the house and I showed things to my dad and explained ideas that I had.
"We know that we want to write our own vows, so we were thinking that we could frame them and put them right here." I said. My dad nodded.
"That would be really cool." Dad said.
"Y/n has such a great eye for decorating things. Like, these signs on the walls, she was the one that found them. There are a lot of things in the house that she picked out, and I liked them so I said yes." Shawn said. I smiled at him and we finished giving him a tour of the inside of the house.
"It really is a beautiful house." Dad said.
"Thank you. Um, Dad, do you want to come in the backyard with me?" I asked. My dad nodded his head.
"Sure." He said. Shawn whispered in my ear.
"Do you want me to come too?" He asked. I shook my head.
"No. I'm good." I said. He nodded and then gave me a quick kiss. My dad and I went out to the backyard and went towards the Boston themed adirondack chairs that Shawn had surprised me with.
"Oh wow, these chairs are great." My dad said when he saw them. We sat down.
"Yeah, Shawn surprised me with them. I literally screamed with joy when I saw them." I said with a small laugh.
"You seem really happy with him." My dad said. I smiled at my engagement ring and nodded.
"Yeah, I am. He's my best friend and he knows me better than anyone else does. There are times, when, like, I'll be picking at my lips, and he doesn't even have to look at me to know that I'm doing it. There was one time that he actually had his eyes closed while I was doing it and he said 'Stop picking at your lips, you're going to make them bleed.' and I was amazed that he could tell that I was doing that. I'll start a sentence and he can finish it for me. He's my everything." I said.
"I got an Instagram so I could follow you, and so I could follow Shawn. I wanted to see the posts about you guys. Your mom called to tell me that you had gotten engaged and I saw the pictures too. How did Shawn propose?" Dad asked. I smiled at the memory.
"Well, we had gone on our second date at Uncle Scottie's bench, and that's where we had our first kiss. He took me back there and I thought that we were just there to recreate memories. His tour photographer, Josiah, was there, and his manager, Andrew was there too. I remember, Shawn sat on the bench while I looked out at the river. Andrew started videotaping and asked me what we were doing there. I said that we were recreating old memories, and Shawn said that we were making new ones. He told me to turn around and that was when I saw him down on one knee. He made the most beautiful speech, and of course I said yes." I said. My dad nodded.
"And those pictures on the kitchen wall are all from the engagement photoshoot?" Dad asked. I nodded.
"Yeah. Dad, we're not really talking about the elephant in the room." I said.
"What do you mean?" He asked.
"I want my dad back. I want a relationship with you again, but if we're going to move forward with our relationship, we need to talk about the past, and we can't avoid it. We can't just stop the conversation when it gets hard. We need to work through this." I said as I looked at him. He sighed and nodded.
"Okay." He said. I began to talk about my feelings, the ones that I had felt ever since I was little. We both shed tears as we spoke about the pain that he has caused me. He apologized more than once and I nodded each time he apologized.
"Dad, when Shawn and I have kids, I want you to be in their lives. But I need you to promise me that if you're going to be in their lives, you actually need to be there for them. If they need their Grandpa Y/d/n, I need you to be there for them. If you start acting anything like you did with Thomas and I, but with mine and Shawn's kids, you'll be out of their lives so fast you won't even have time to blink. I'm serious about this. Understand?" I asked. My dad nodded.
"I understand." My dad said. I nodded.
"Good. So, we've talked things through, but I still need time. I still need you to prove to me that you've changed for the better, and then once I see that change, then we'll talk about you walking me down the aisle and stuff like that." I said. My dad nodded.
"I understand." He said.
"Good. Let's go back inside and you can get to know Shawn better." I said. Dad nodded.
"Okay." He said. We went inside and Shawn was watching tv. He stood up when he saw us come in.
"Hey. I made grilled cheese." Shawn said. I smiled and gave him a quick kiss.
"Okay. Should we all sit down and eat?" I asked. Shawn and my dad nodded.
"Yeah. Baby, can I talk to you for a second please?" Shawn asked. I nodded and we went in the other room. I knew that he was going to ask how everything went, so I beat him to it.
"The talk went well, I talked about everything that I've felt and I told him in no uncertain terms that if he is going to be in my life, and if he's going to be in our kids lives, then he better shape up. I told him that if he acts anything like he did as a father to Thomas and I, but to our kids, then he'll be out of their lives so fast that he won't even have time to blink." I said as Shawn rubbed my arms. Shawn nodded.
"Good. I'm so proud of you baby." Shawn said before kissing my cheek. I smiled.
"Thank you honey." I said. We then went back to the kitchen table. Shawn and I sat across from each other, and my dad sat next to me. My dad and Shawn talked and got to know each other better. It was actually a really nice time. Soon, my dad left, with the promise of coming back the next day.
One month later
My relationship with my dad has gotten so much better. It's now better than it ever was, even when I was little. I felt happy again. My dad would be coming over. I had a surprise for him, which Shawn knew about. The doorbell rang and I felt nervous. I looked at Shawn.
"You got this babe." He said. I nodded and stood up and answered the door.
"Hi Dad." I said as I opened the door more for him to come in.
"Hi Y/n. Hi Shawn." My dad said before giving us hugs.
"Come on in. I have a surprise for you. Let's sit down." I said.
"What is it?" He asked. I turned on my speaker and began to play Love Me Tender by Elvis Presley. Shawn and I knew what was going on, but my dad didn't. I smiled at Shawn, but also felt nervous. Shawn could tell, and he kissed my cheek.
"You got this honey." Shawn said. I nodded. As the song started to come to an end, I got up and grabbed a picture frame of me wearing my dad's sunglasses as I sat on his lap. It was a copy of the original picture. The original picture, I had ripped in half and it needed to be taped. I held the frame in my lap and waited for the song to come to an end. My dad looked at me.
"What was that? Why were you playing Elvis?" He asked. I handed him the frame and he smiled as tears formed in his eyes.
"Dad?" I asked. He looked at me.
"Yes?" He asked. Tears formed in my own eyes.
"At mine and Shawn's wedding, would you like to dance to Love Me Tender for our last dance together?" I asked. He began to cry more.
"Really?" My dad asked as Shawn rubbed my back. I nodded.
"Yeah." I said.
"I would love that." He said. I smiled.
"Would you like to walk me down the aisle too?" I asked. My dad put his head in his hands and cried. He then set the frame down and gave me a hug.
"I would love to. I love you and I'm sorry for how I was in the past." My dad said.
"I love you too." I said. I paused before saying words that I hadn't expected myself to ever say to my dad. "I forgive you."
"Really?" He asked as he pulled away from the hug and looked at me. We were both crying. I nodded.
"Yeah." I said. He smiled.
On May 25th, 2024, my dad walked me down the aisle at mine and Shawn's wedding. At mine and Shawn's reception, Shawn had his last dance with Karen to What A Wonderful World by Louis Armstrong, and then my dad and I danced to Love Me Tender. I cried as we danced, but they were happy tears. My relationship with my dad was stronger than ever, and that made me happy. I'm so glad that Shawn, my husband, encouraged me to repair my relationship with my dad.
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