About two months ago, the singer and songwriter Shawn Mendes, who I had been dating for almost four years, asked me to marry him, and I said yes. The next day he asked me to go on tour with him for the summer before school started again, and I said yes to that too. Shawn was then home from tour for another month before I hit the road with him. It's been really fun to be on tour with Shawn. He lets me sit with him during some of the q and a sessions before his concerts, and I get to watch him rehearse and stuff.

But there's a couple of problems: I've never been away from home for this long, so I'm really homesick, and I've been having trouble falling asleep on the tour bus, causing me to be exhausted. I haven't told Shawn about how tired I am, but I think he's catching on.

"Are you going to join me for this q and a babe?" Shawn asked. I thought for a moment before shaking my head.

"No. I'm just going to relax back here in your dressing room if that's okay." I said. Shawn kissed my forehead and the spot that he kissed was left feeling tingly even after his lips were no longer there.

"That's fine. I love you." Shawn said. I smiled at him.

"I love you too." I said. Shawn then went to the q and a. I laid down on the couch and closed my eyes. I had my eyes closed for what felt like ten seconds when suddenly I felt someone rub my cheek with their thumb. I opened my eyes and saw Shawn. He smiled at me.

"Hi baby. Are you tired?" He asked. I nodded.

"Yeah. What are you doing babe? Go to your q and a." I said. Shawn chuckled.

"Honey I already did. You've been out like a light this whole time." Shawn said. My eyes widened.

"Damn." I said.

"Why don't you stay back here during the concert so you can rest? You look really tired." Shawn said. I shook my head.

"No I'm fine. I'll watch from the side of the stage." I said.

"You're very stubborn, did you know that?" Shawn asked. I laughed and nodded.

"Yeah. I'm fine babe, really." I said as I tried to open my eyes more. Shawn sighed.

"Okay. But if you get tired, I want you to come back here and rest, okay?" Shawn asked. I nodded.

"Okay." I said. Shawn smiled at me. Soon, it was time for him to perform, and I stood on the side of the stage. Shawn had only performed two songs when I turned to Andrew, Shawn's manager, and told him that I was going to go lay down in Shawn's dressing room. He nodded and said that he would let Shawn know when he got off stage. I closed my eyes, and a little bit later, I woke up to someone lifting me up. "Huh?"

"Shhh babe, it's just me." Shawn said as he carried me bridal style. I nodded.

"Okay." I said.

"Let's get you to the tour bus so you can rest." Shawn said.

"I can walk, you know." I said. Shawn laughed as he continued to carry me.

"Yeah, but I like carrying you. Close your eyes babe." Shawn said. I shook my head.

"How was the show? Why did I ask that? You're always amazing." I asked and said. Shawn laughed as we reached the tour bus. He carried me to the back of the bus and laid me down.

"Sleep, my love. I'll carry you to our hotel room when we get there." Shawn said, and I was too tired to say anything, so I simply nodded.

The next time that I woke up, it was the middle of the night and I was in a hotel room, cuddled up to my amazing fiancé. Suddenly, I felt really homesick, and all of this tiredness was catching up to me. I got out of bed, grabbed my phone, went in the bathroom, shut the door, and called my mom.

"Hello?" She asked. I immediately started to cry, but I tried to cry quietly so I wouldn't wake up Shawn.

"Hi. Um, I'm sorry if I woke you up. I'm just having a hard time." I said.

"Why honey? What's going on?" She asked.

"I'm so tired. I have so much trouble falling asleep on the bus and the tiredness is really catching up to me. And I'm so homesick. I miss you and Thomas and dad." I said.

"Do you want to come home?" She asked.

"I don't know. I don't want to leave Shawn because then we'll just miss each other and plus I don't want to upset him or anything." I said.

"Oh honey, you wouldn't upset him. He's your fiancé and he loves you more than anything. Talk to him." My mom said. There was a knock at the door and then Shawn opened it.

"I have to go mom, Shawn just walked in." I said, and we hung up. Shawn walked over to me and put his hands on my cheeks so he was cupping my face.

"What's wrong my love?" Shawn asked.

"I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry and I would completely understand if you get mad at me." I said. Shawn tilted his head in confusion.

"What's going on babe?" Shawn said. I wrapped my fingers around his wrists, making sure that his warm hands stayed on my face.

"I, um, I've never really been one to fall asleep in a moving vehicle, so I haven't been sleeping very well lately, but I haven't told you, because I don't want you to worry about me." I said rather quickly.

"Shhh baby girl, slow down. Breathe, and then repeat what you just said but slower please." Shawn said. I did as told and he nodded.

"And plus, I've never been away from home for this long, and I'm really homesick. I just don't know what to do and I'm so sorry. I completely understand if you're mad at me." I said. Shawn pulled me in for a hug.

"Oh honey, it's okay. If you want to go home, I won't be mad at all." Shawn said. I nodded.

"I just don't know what to do because I don't want to leave you, but at the same time I want to sleep in my own bed." I said as I continued to cry. Shawn swayed us from side to side as he rubbed my back, trying to soothe me.

"It's okay honey. We can still Facetime and text and call, just like we usually do." Shawn said. I nodded and yawned. "Let's get you in bed." Shawn said. I nodded and let him guide me over to the bed. I didn't lay down though. I still wanted to talk more. Shawn got in on his side of the bed and opened up his arms so I could cuddle up to him and put my head on his chest.

"I'm really sorry. It's not like I want to leave you, but I'm just so tired and I want to sleep in my own bed and see my mom and dad and Thomas again." I said.

"I know baby. It's okay. When do you want to leave?" Shawn asked. I sighed.

"I don't know. I'm going to miss you, you know that, right?" I asked. Shawn kissed the top of my head.

"Of course I know that, and I'm going to miss you too. How about we sleep now, and figure everything out in the morning?" Shawn said and asked. I nodded.

"Okay. Is anyone from your band, or Andrew, or anyone going to be mad at me?" I asked.

"No, of course not. They'll understand." Shawn said. I nodded and we laid down and cuddled up to each other. By now I had stopped crying.

"I love you Shawn." I said.

"I love you too Y/n." He said, and we fell asleep. In the morning we bought my plane ticket, and before his show, Shawn, Andrew, and Jake had the time to take me to the airport. We got to where I had to say goodbye to them, and I turned to Shawn with tears in my eyes and smiled at him. He smiled back and took my hands in his.

"Thank you for having me come with you baby. It was really fun." I said. Shawn's smile widened.

"Of course, thank you for coming. It was fun for me too." He said. I squeezed his hands and he squeezed back.

"I'm going to miss you Shawn Mendes." I said as a few tears spilled over. He pulled me in for a hug.

"I'm going to miss you too Y/n Y/l/n. I love you so damn much." Shawn said. I looked up at him and puckered up my lips. He placed his lips on mine and I felt my heart race as if I had just run a marathon, I felt butterflies erupt and fly around in my tummy, and I felt sparks shoot through my body like fireworks. Shawn and I pulled away from the kiss.

"I love you so damn much too. I'll see you when you get home." I said. He nodded.

"Okay. Call me when you land and then call me again when you get home please." Shawn said. I smiled and nodded.

"Okay. I'll see you later honey. Bye Jake, bye Andrew." I said. They gave me hugs. I looked at Shawn again and gave him one more kiss before turning to board the plane. I didn't turn around as I boarded the plane, not even for one final wave. I knew that if I did, I wouldn't get on the plane but go running into Shawn's arms instead. I got to my seat on the plane and cried a little. Luckily no one bothered me. My brother picked me up at the airport.

"Hey, how was your flight?" He asked.

"Good. Now I just have to call my fiancé and tell him that I landed." I said. Thomas nodded. Shawn soon picked up.

"Hey baby. I'm guessing that you landed?" He asked.

"Yeah, I'm with Thomas now and we're heading to the car." I said.

"Okay. Um, I have a question for you." Shawn said.

"Yeah, what is it?" I asked.

"Why didn't you turn around and wave to us one more time before you got on the plane?" Shawn asked. Tears formed in my eyes.

"Because I knew that if I did that, I would go running into your arms and I wouldn't get on that plane." I said.

"Oh honey. I love you so much." Shawn said. I smiled.

"I love you too. I'll call you when I get home." I said.

"Okay. Bye baby." Shawn said.

"Bye." I said, and we hung up. My brother put his arm around me.

"It's okay. You're home now." Thomas said. I nodded, and when I got back to mine and Shawn's house, I called him to tell him. He was laughing when he answered.

"Hi babe." He said.

"Hi. I'm home. Why are you laughing?" I asked as I smiled and sat on the couch.

"So I'm at my q and a right now, and a fan just asked me if she could show me a picture of you, and I said of course, and she showed me the picture and was like 'it's your fiancé with another guy.' and the picture was of Thomas with his arm around your shoulders." Shawn said.

"Ewwww, that's my brother." I said as I laughed. Shawn laughed and then repeated what I said to his fans.

"All right darling, you go rest." He said. I nodded even though he couldn't see me.

"Okay. I love you." I said.

"I love you too. Make sure you dream of me." Shawn said. I giggled.

"I always do." I said.

"Awww. She said that she always does." Shawn said to his fans.

"I'll talk to you later." I said.

"Okay, bye honey." He said.

"Bye babe." I said, and we hung up. I plugged my phone in, put on some of Shawn's music, and got into bed. I love Shawn so much, and I'm so glad that he wasn't mad at me. I can't wait to see him when he gets home.