A/n: Okay I'll be honest, this one is really sad. Please enjoy anyways! Okay, let's begin.

"Hmmm, that feels nice." Shawn Mendes, my boyfriend of four years said as I rubbed his head.

"Yeah?" I asked. He nodded his head against my chest.

"Yeah. I can't wait to get back home." Shawn said while yawning. Him and I are currently in Los Angeles for an event that he had to attend. He wanted me to come, so I did. Tomorrow him and I will fly back to our home in Boston.

"I know. Just one flight in the morning and then a drive and then we'll be back in our beds." I said to Shawn. He nodded.

"I'm tired." He said while yawning again. I giggled.

"I can tell. I am too, let's get some rest honey." I said. Shawn lifted his head up and looked at me.

"Okay, but I want a kiss first." Shawn said.

"Then kiss me." I said with a smirk. Shawn instantly put his lips on mine. I felt butterflies erupt and fly around in my tummy, I felt my heart race as if I had just run a marathon, and I felt sparks shoot through me like fireworks. Shawn and I soon pulled away, breathless from the amazing, passionate, yet gentle, kiss, smiling at each other.

"I love you Y/n. I'm going to wife you up one of these days." Shawn said as he put his head back on my chest.

"I love you too, and I promise that when you ask me to be your wife, I'll say yes." I said. Shawn held me tighter, and we fell asleep like that. The next morning we woke up to a knock on our hotel door. Shawn got up and answered it.

"Are you guys all set to go?" Andrew, Shawn's manager, asked. We nodded, and soon we were in the car. I put my head on Shawn's shoulder and closed my eyes.

"Baby, we're here." Shawn said as he lightly shook me to wake me up.

"Huh?" I asked, causing Shawn to chuckle.

"We're at the airport sleepy head. Time to catch our flight so we can go home." Shawn said. I nodded and got out of the car. Soon, Shawn and I had landed in Boston. Shawn's jeep, JBone, was still in the parking lot when we got there.

"Do you want to drive? I'm tired." I asked and said. Shawn laughed.

"Yeah I'll drive." Shawn said. We got into the car and were soon on the highway.

"Did you miss your precious jeep?" I teased Shawn. He chuckled.

"Yes, I did. Thank you honey." Shawn said. I gave him a look of confusion.

"What are you thanking me for?" I asked.

"For coming with me to the event." Shawn said.

"You're welcome. I like being with you so it was fun." I said with a smile.

"It was fun for me too. I just can't wait to get home and relax in bed or on the couch with you." Shawn said. I nodded. His right hand was on my thigh, and I interlaced our fingers before bringing his hand up to my lips to place a gentle kiss there. He smiled.

"I love you." I said. Shawn looked over at me with a smile on his face before returning his gaze back to the road.

"I love you too honey." Shawn said. Shawn released his hand from mine and put it on the steering wheel as he merged into another lane. Suddenly, a car from our left came smashing into us.

"SHAWN!" I yelled. Our car did a few flips before landing rightside up. I had definitely hit my head because it was hurting, but somehow, other than that, I felt fine. I looked over at Shawn. "SHAWN!" I yelled again. No response again. His face somehow still looked handsome even though it was bloody and starting bruise. I soon heard a siren and a paramedic came to my door. "My boyfriend, get my boyfriend, he's not responding to me." I said. One paramedic stayed with me and then got me out of the car while another one went to Shawn.

"He's going to need to go to the hospital by helicopter." The paramedic said.

"Is he going to be okay?" I asked as I laid on the stretcher.

"Ma'am, he's in critical condition right now. We need you to calm down." The paramedic said. Soon, I was taken to the hospital too. As soon as I got into my room, I called my mom and told her everything.

"I'm on my way. You call Karen and Manny." She said.

"Okay." I said. I hit Karen's contact name and called her. She picked up after only a few rings.

"Hi Y/n! How are you?" She asked. I broke down crying. "What's wrong?"

"Shawn and I were in a car accident and they said that he's in critical condition." I sobbed.

"Okay, Manny, Aaliyah and I will fly down as soon as possible. Are you okay?" She asked.

"They said I have a concussion and I'm just really worried about Shawn." I said.

"Listen to me Y/n, everything is going to be okay. I have to go, but we'll see you soon." She said.

"Okay. Bye." I said.

"Bye." She said, and we hung up. My parents soon arrived but all I wanted was to see my boyfriend.

"Please let her see Shawn." My mom pleaded with the doctor. The doctor hesitantly nodded. My mom came with me into Shawn's room, and when I saw him lying there unconscious, I broke down crying again. I sat down next to his bed and held his hand. I stayed like that for hours - literally. I even fell asleep in the chair. Suddenly, I felt a hand on my shoulder. I looked up and saw Karen. I stood up and we immediately hugged as I started crying again.

"Shhh Y/n, everything's going to be fine. Why don't you go back to your room and get some rest and we'll keep an eye on him?" Karen suggested as we pulled away from the hug. I hugged Manny and Aaliyah before answering her question. I shook my head.

"No, I'm okay. I just want to be with him and make sure that he's okay. The doctors said that he's in a coma right now." I said. Karen nodded.

A week went by with no sign of improvement from Shawn. Karen, Manny, and Aaliyah were adamant: they were staying in town at least until Shawn woke up. We all stayed by Shawn's bedside. One day, I was sitting next to his bed when the machines started to act up. Manny went and got the doctor. Once the doctor saw whatever was going on, he called in a bunch of nurses, and kicked the rest of us out. I broke down sobbing again. Aaliyah and I held each other as Manny and Karen held each other. After a few minutes, a solemn looking doctor came back out.

"Mr. and Mrs. Mendes?" The doctor asked. Karen and Manny stepped forward.

"Yes?" They asked.

"I'm so sorry to tell you this but... your son's injuries got to be too much for his body to handle. I'm so sorry for your loss." The doctor said. Both Karen and I dropped to the ground sobbing.

"No!" We screamed. Her and I looked at each other, stood up, and hugged. She then turned to Aaliyah. It was then that I saw my mom. She must have been dropping by to visit Shawn. I ran to her, hugged her, and sobbed.

"What happened?" She asked.

"He's gone. Shawn's gone." I said. She pulled away from the hug with wide eyes.

"What do you mean he's gone?" She asked, but I think that she knew. I sat down with her.

"He's d-d-dead. Shawn died." I sobbed. My mom hugged me as she cried before she went over to Shawn's family and hugged them. Mine and Shawn's families had always gotten along very well. Aaliyah walked over to me and sat down next to me.

"What happens next?" She asked.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"To us? You're still going to be part of the family, right Y/n?" Aaliyah asked. I held her hand in mine and squeezed.

"I will always be part of the Mendes family, as long as you guys will have me." I said.

"We'll always want to have you." She said. I gave her a small smile and pulled her in for a hug.

"Y/n?" Karen asked. I looked up at her.

"Yes?" I asked. Aaliyah got up so Karen could sit down. Karen grabbed my hand.

"Do you want to know what Shawn said to me over the phone the day before the accident?" She asked. I nodded.

"What did he say?" I asked.

"He said that as soon as he got home, he was going to go into the dresser in your bedroom, and in the top drawer, was a box. Y/n, he was going to propose to you." Karen said. I cried some more.

"I would have said yes." I said.

"I know. Listen, you will always be part of the Mendes family. We've always loved you." She said.

"Thank you. I love you guys too." I said.

"I have a question for you, and it's a bit of a heavy one." Karen said.

"What is it?" I asked. She looked at me.

"Would you like to help me plan Shawn's funeral?" She asked. I nodded.

"Yes. I'll help in any way that I can." I said. She patted my hand. Soon, I was driven to mine and Shawn's house - well, I guess now it's just my house - by my mom, with Karen, Manny, and Aaliyah in the car. This would be my first time back to the house since Shawn died. When we got there, my best friend Grace, was waiting outside.

"Y/n!" She yelled, and I ran into her arms. We hugged as we cried. "I'm so sorry for your loss. He loved you, you know that right?" She asked, and all I could do was nod. I soon regained my composure and turned to Shawn's family.

"This is my best friend Grace. Grace, these are Shawn's parents, Karen and Manny, and his sister, Aaliyah." I said. They all shook hands.

"Hi, nice to meet you guys. I'm so sorry for your loss." Grace said. They thanked her and we all went inside. The first thing that I saw when I walked into the house was a picture of Shawn and I. I then turned into the living room and was met with more pictures of Shawn and I. I sat down on the couch and cried. Grace put her arms around me and held me as we cried together.

"I'll be right back. I need to be alone for a few minutes." I said as I stood up. Manny grabbed my hand gently.

"Are you okay?" He asked. I nodded but then stopped.

"Not really, but I will be. I just need to check on something." I said. He nodded.

"Okay." He said. I went upstairs to mine and Shawn's bedroom and went to our dresser and opened up the top drawer. Sure enough, there was a little velvet box in there. I slowly took it out and sat down on the bed. It wasn't until I was sitting that I opened the box. In it was the most gorgeous ring that I had ever seen. Tears formed in my eyes.

"Oh my gosh. He was really going to do it." I whispered. I sat there for a few minutes before hearing a knock on the door. I looked up to see Karen.

"He told me that he took Grace with him to pick it out." She said, pointing at the ring. I smiled.

"It's so beautiful." I said as she sat down next to me.

"It is. I just, um, I just talked to Andrew. He's going to release a statement saying that Shawn passed away. I don't know if you want to post something about Shawn too." Karen said. I nodded as I got up and put the ring away.

"Yeah. I will - if that's okay?" I asked. Karen nodded.

"Of course it is. You were the love of his life and he was the love of yours. Post about him as much as you want." Karen said. I nodded. I sat back down on the bed.

"What am I going to do? How am I supposed to live without him Karen?" I asked. She thought for a moment before putting her arm around me and pulling me close to her.

"He would want you to be happy. I know that that's going to be hard, but, everyday try to find something good, something that makes you smile. He wouldn't want us to hole ourselves away inside. He would want us to get some fresh air, and smile. He would want us to live our best lives. We have to do that for him." She said. I nodded. "Manny and I were thinking, and, unless it would be too much, we would like you to speak at the funeral."

"Oh, um, okay." I said. She patted me on the back.

That night, when I couldn't sleep, probably because the bed was too cold, I posted my favorite picture of Shawn and I. Him and I were on a boat. He was smiling at the camera, but I wasn't looking at the camera. I was too busy admiring him. I wrote the caption as I cried.

"Less than twenty-four hours ago, I lost my best friend, my soulmate, my everything. Shawn, what is this world going to do without you? Probably fall apart. I know that that's what I'm doing. I can't stop crying. You should be here Shawn. We should be cuddling in bed together. Instead, I'm laying in a cold bed while Manny, Karen, Aaliyah, my mom, and Grace spend the night. We were supposed to spend the rest of our lives together. We said that we would get married and have a family together - two girls and a boy. We even had names picked out. I'll miss our counter talks in the morning while you made breakfast, I'll miss your love of Grey's Anatomy, I'll miss our cuddle sessions, or talks, your kisses, Shawn, I'll miss everything about you. I'll always love you Shawn, and I'll never forget you. I'll see you again someday. Xoxo."

The next morning, I woke up hoping that I would find Shawn next to me, but when I looked at his side of the bed, he wasn't there, and I knew that none of this had just been one big, bad dream. I laid in bed and cried for an hour before getting up. I had a headache from crying. I wandered downstairs and into the kitchen to get some medicine for the pain, but when I saw Manny making pancakes in the kitchen at the stove, I dropped to the ground and sobbed. Manny ran over to me.

"He would always make him and I pancakes in the morning. He would pick me up and put me on the counter and we would talk as he made them." I said as I sobbed. Grace soon came running into the room.

"What happened?" She asked while looking back and forth between Manny and I. I explained to her what I had just explained to Manny.

"I have a headache." I said. She nodded.

"Okay, let me grab some pain medicine, you go sit down on the couch, okay?" She asked. I nodded and did as told.

The following week flew by as a blur. I wrote the speech out for Shawn's funeral but I could barely remember what I had said. I know that I had talked about how much I loved him, and that my love for him will never end. When we all got to the cemetery, I sat with Shawn's family, and placed a kiss on his coffin before they lowered it down. I don't know what I'm going to do without Shawn, but whatever I do, I'll do my best, just for him.

A/n: The picture you posted of you and Shawn: