Shawn's P.O.V.
Ok so last night I called Cameron and he would not answer his phone. I legit called 57 times. Is that too much? I'm sorry but I love him and we need to talk about this. Communication always helps us. I'm hoping that after sleeping on it for a night, he'll want to talk to me today. I feel like such an idiot. I should have just told him what happened. What if he doesn't want to forgive me? What if he doesn't forgive me? This can't really be the end of us could it? You can't think like that Shawn. Stop it! I start calling Cameron again and sure enough he won't answer. I go to his Instagram and see he has a new picture posted. It was a very sad looking selfie. He wasn't crying in it, but his face looked very worn out. He was clearly very sad. The caption read: "You were the one person whom I thought could never hurt me. My dear how truly wrong I was." Damn. I felt my chest drop when I read that. Like my chest legit is hurting right now. Goosebumps ran down my arms as this sat in. I hurt Cameron and he honestly meant what he said; he trusted me with everything he had and I ruined it. Ok calm down Shawn. I feel tear coming out of my eyes. You did this to yourself Shawn! I get dressed and get out of bed. I look at myself in the mirror. I literally find it hard to look at myself right now. I hurt Cameron; I hurt my Cameron. I hurt him in a way that I'm never going to be able to fix. No matter how hard I try, no matter what I do, I'm never going to be able to undo what I did. I need to talk to Cameron. I'm leaving Nashville tonight so I need to find him before we leave. I still have four more performances on this tour before I can go home. I call my driver. He said he'd be here in 10 minutes. I call Nash and wait for him to answer. "Hello?"

"Nash oh my God thank you for answering. I need to talk to you."

"What do you want Shawn?"

"Do you know where Cameron is? I have to talk to him."

"Haven't you done enough damage Shawn." Ouch. Cameron must have already told him.

"I just need to talk to my husband Nash." I here Nash grown sadly, like he's fighting back tears.

"He's not your husband anymore stupid." Ouch.

"Why would you say that Nash? He's still my husband. Don't say stuff like that." My heart is starting to beat faster.

"No stupid. I came to tell you guys some really important news." he pauses for a second. "You're guys' marriage was not official. The preacher's church didn't approve your marriage because you're a same sex couple." Woah. Wait. So what he's basically telling me is that we're not married, on a technicality? So just because we're not legally married does that not mean we're not married in our hearts? What if Cameron doesn't wanna legally marry me now?

"Look Nash I just need to talk to Cameron. Can you please tell me where he is. I'm begging you. If I never had to ask for anything again this would be the last thing I ask for. I just need to talk to him." I hear Nash breathing into the phone. Come on Nash. Just tell me.

"He's at the park on the east side of town."

"Thank you so much Nash. You're not gonna regret this."

"Before you go I just want you to know Shawn I don't know what your expecting to do but honestly you can't fix this. No one can; you have forever ruined him." The phone call ends. Damn. I walk out of the hotel, my driver just showing up. I get into the car and tell him where to go. First I ask if he could take me to the nearest flower shop. I get out at the flower shop. I look around for a few minutes until I find the most beautiful roses. I only need one. I know it's cliche but roses seem to be me and Cameron's flower. He brought me roses the night he confessed his feelings to me. I hold back tears as I think about that. Cameron was so happy that night; so in love with me. I get back into the car after getting the rose. Now I just need to find Cameron at this park.

"I'll call you when I'm ready to leave. It'll probably be a good hour maybe two." I say to my driver. He nods and drives away. Ok this park isn't that big. I'm bound to find him somewhere.
I've been walking around for a good 20 minutes now and I have no idea where Cameron is. Maybe he's on one of the hiking trails. I don't know. I start heading in the direction of one. My phone vibrates in my pocket and I pull it out instantly, thinking that it was Cameron. It was just a twitter notification. Damn. I look up as I collide into another person. We both fall to the ground, this person on top of me. As my eyes focus I see that it's Cameron. He doesn't look like the Cameron I know. His eyes are very much darker, not containing the sparkle that they used to. His eyes also look deeper and swollen, likes he's been crying nonstop for hours. His whole face just looks more worn out and stiffer. When he sees who I am he instantly jumps back off of me, taking a step or two away from me. "Cameron listen I wanna talk." He just shakes his head. Why is he looking at me like this. His eyes are wide, and filled with fear. He looks at me as though I'm a big scary monster. Am I? "We need to talk babe." I say standing in front of him.

"Don't call me that."

"What?" I ask confused.

"Don't you dare call me babe." He says angrily pointing his finger at me. His teeth are gritted and he's clearly fighting back tears. "You don't get to call me that anymore."

"Cameron..." I say sadly.

"You know what Shawn? No matter what you say this is never going to be fixed. No matter how much you ask for forgiveness, no matter how many stupid roses you buy me (he has the rose in his hand now) no matter how much you tell me you 'love' me, no matter how much anything you do, this hurt that I'm feeling will never go away. You have hurt me in a way that I thought was not humanly possible. Sure at times I acted jealous but I never actually thought you would cheat on me. Like what the fuck Shawn." He's waiting for me to respond. "What the fuck!" he yells this time.

"Calm down Cameron." I say to him. People are starting to look at us.

"Calm down? You want me to calm down? Why? Is it because you don't want the whole world knowing what you did Shawn? Is that it? Are you embarrassed of yourself? Because you don't get to be embarrassed. I should be embarrassed. I gave you everything I fucking had and I guess it just wasn't enough for you was it." He's clearly yelling now and no longer holding back his tears. We're standing by the restrooms, the sidewall right next to us.

"You were enough for me Cameron. You still are enough. You'll always be enough. I still love you."

"You still love me?" he says in a mocking tone. "No Shawn you don't. You're wrong. Wrong! If you fucking loved me, you wouldn't have done what you did."

"Cameron you need to calm down if we're going to talk about this." He looks up at me, looking crazy. His eyes are wide and he's not blinking.

"You need me to calm down Shawn? Am I not calm enough for yah?" He walks toward me bumping against me. "This isn't calm?" He pushes me again and I just take it. "Huh? Isn't this calm enough?" he yells. He shoves me with all of his strength to the ground. My elbow scrapes across the concrete. I bring it up, looking at blood coming out of a freshly made cut. Great. I get back up to my feet. Cameron looks mad and confused. "I'm sorry." he says calmly.

"No you're not Cameron. And you shouldn't be. I deserve this. I deserve more this this. Honestly Cameron I think I deserve to die for what I did to you. I did something that we both promised we'd never do. I didn't just cheat on you, I cheated on us. And now I'm loosing the only thing that truly mattered in my life. And I deserve it!" He wants to tell me I'm wrong. He wants to hold me in his arms. I know it. But I also know he can't; he won't. "I've gotta go Cameron. Please call me when you're ready to talk. I'll leave you alone and give you space to think." He just looks at me. "I'm gonna go." I look him in he eyes. "And I want you to know that I love you. And I always will love you. I'll be here if you still want me."

"Still want you Shawn? Really? Of course I still want you. I'm head over heels in fucking love with you Shawn. You're the number one priority in my life. You're the first thing I think about when I wake up in the morning. The last think I think about when I go to bed. Almost everything I do reminds me of you. And it hurts because the Shawn I love I know I'm never going to get back. That was a different Shawn. That was a Shawn that wouldn't do something like this. The Shawn I know, the Shawn I fell in love with would never have cheated on me. So yah Shawn, maybe I'm not ready just yet to talk about this considering I've known for a little over 12 hours but I need you to understand that we are no longer what you think we are. We never will be again. We can never be the couple we were. You've shattered our relationship. You've shattered me. You've shattered our love. And quite frankly Shawn, a broken glass cup is just garbage, because no matter how hard you try, that glass will never piece back together to make a cup. And even if it did it, the lines from where it was cracked would always be visible. Always." He dries his tears. "So yah Shawn I'm gonna go back to L.A. And I want you to finish out this tour of yours. When you're done I should be moved out of the apartment. I can't just go back to living with you. I can't see you anymore Shawn." What am I hearing?

"Are you breaking up with me?" I ask, my voice shaky.

"No Shawn. You broke up with me when you slept with Nevada." He turns around.

"What about our marriage!?" I yell. "What about us? You're just going to through all of that away? You don't even want to try and fix this?" I'm on my edge. There's nothing else I can say. Nothing else I can do.

"We were never married Shawn. I mean we were in here." He points to his heart. "At least I was. I was willing to give everything up for you. And we can't fix this Shawn. I'm leaving you because you left me first." He turns back around to walk away.

"I love you." I say. I'm crying now. He turns around, giving me a dirty look.

"You look so pathetic Shawn. Just stop." Holy fuck. That hurt more than anything he's ever said to me. He's walking away now. I fall onto my knees. My heart is beating so fast. This hurts so fucking bad. What is happening? Just calm down Shawn. Breathe. Just breathe.