James

Once the door slams, I am in a state of shock. No not shock, it feels as if a consternation of mixed emotions has all crashed together, causing me to helplessly try to get up even though my battered heart is rattled while my head is spinning with so many thoughts.

Once I manage to get up, I instantly slam my fists on her door and plead "Please Odessa! Just give me a chance to explain!"

There is no reply, even after my second attempt. Tasting defeat, I slide down against the door and try to focus on my coarse breathing.

I've been training hard the past few weeks as tomorrow is the big day, the day I meet the cameras.

It's an annual thing for the paparazzi, they try to soak up every second they can as they get to see what's it's like for the future heir to the throne.

It's not like any odd interview on the Report, journalists far and wide are travelling to the castle to get to know the real me. They bombard you with countless of questions and demand answers, no matter what the consequences. Plus to make things worse there is also a photo shoot with steamy moments, hence all the extra effort of push ups and running.

Usually for the past three years, it has been Gerard taking the spotlight, but now since he is gone, the weight is on my shoulders.

If I am to be truthful, I am absolutely terrified.
I am not the type of person to put myself out to the adoring public, let alone show off my bare chest. I mean, I do have standards. Even though I do let loose from time to time and let my body do it's magic, I am not the one to want a six pack and have young adolescences drooling at posters of me stuck up to their walls.

This life of ruling has so many aspects I never thought of before. When I was younger, I just thought it was all about making important decisions. Now as I age, I learn it is about making important decisions and the public watches your every move while you have a dagger on your back controlling every decision you make and you can't stop the sheer aftermath of pressure take over you. You just got to keep on smiling no matter what.

Just sitting here in my sweaty condition outside Odessa's bedroom makes me think is any of this worth it?
I could easily just run away and start afresh. I was never cut out for this. I could start afresh. I could finally be someone I always wanted to be; me.

All of this is due to yesterday. I shouldn't have done it. No matter if Father did strangle me, I should have stuck to my guns and have not let the thoughts of the aftermath and anxiety gets to me. Look what he has done to me. He has ruined everything for me.

Adrenaline fuelled anger pumps throughout my shook body. With an outburst of strength, I get up from my moping and start to run down the hallway towards the stairs. He is probably in the chamber room looking over the minutes of his last meeting.

So much fury is inside of me, I can't stop running. Imagining what I will say, I rush up the stairs turning left and up again to finally reach the third floor. I will now have my moment, a victory I truly deserve.

As I edge closer towards the chamber room, I hear the familiar timid voice of Xavier. I stop to a hold, pressing against the cold wall as I eavesdrop in their conversation.

"- I hope you understand my decision your highness" There is a brief pause then a deep projection of voice from Father "So you wish to leave our service?"

"Yes sir" Xavier replies. I can imagine his hands jittering as he is memorised by Father's presence.

"May I ask why you wish to leave?" Father asks and soon I start to pray.

Please don't mention my name, please don't mention my name, please don't mention my name.

"I just feel uncomfortable in my area, I feel I would benefit more as part of the kitchen headquarters"

He's leaving me for the kitchen?!

Father lets out a breath and utters "Fine, I will let Head chef Glenda know the following transaction before you shall leave, it may take a week before you may be moved"

Xavier is so grateful he lets out a huge sigh of relief as he says "Thank you so much your highness"

As I try to contemplate over what he just said, I hear the door close as footsteps edge closer.

I panic and turn around towards the end of the hallway and in the process, I tip a large urn to the side. I manage to catch it before it falls. It wobbles as it finds its grounding. As I let it settle again, Xavier stands before me, his eyebrows raised in a confused expression. As he tilts his head to the side he is perplexed "James?"

I straighten my back and embrace myself for the worst as I turn to him. I let out a cough as I glance up to the smartly dressed gentleman. "Um hello Xavier, I'm just about to do a routine check up on the budgets" He only glares "But you never work on the weekends"

As I try to think of something witty to say, I can only come up with "Well being the king doesn't end at the weekend" and I march off, leaving him to envisage to himself.

I brace myself as I over think what to say to Father. He deserves to hear the truth, the absolute and utter truth. I don't even knock on the door, I just barge in and say "Father we need to talk"

Father is sitting at the round table, his back turned to me. Once he registers my sharp tone he turns his head and says in a pleasurable pitch "Ah James! Just the man I wanted to see"

He now pulls out a seat and pats on the plush cushion on the elegantly craved seat. "Do sit" he commands.

"Father I have matters to discuss about last night-"

"So do I" I am startled to see him smile sincerely as he waits for me to sit.
I caution forward as he pours himself a tall glass of red wine. Once I am seated, I let loose my wrath as I start. "Look Father what happened last night shouldn't -" but he cuts me off as he puts on the protector on the centre of the table.

A news report plays of Nicolai standing outside his palace, the Southern Isles flag flying behind him. Up close you can still see the bruise on his cheek fading but it is mostly covered with makeup.

"As of today, I hereby declare I accept the terms to Prince James Blackthorn of Erivale's apology. The last month has been a struggle but my recovery of the trauma has been miraculous, especially after hearing such a long awaited apology"

A camera flashes and soon reporters start buzzing, darting questions left right and centre, but only one stands out. "What about Odessa Blackthorn? Do you accept her apology?"

There is a brief silence as the ruddy prick tries to come up with another lie.

"I do accept her apology and by all means, I want to express my side of the story"

My heart races as I wait eagerly to see if he will confess the truth.

"I believe that night with Odessa was magical, she is truly a breathtaking girl.."

That you took advantage of...

"She has truly suffered a lot in the past few months. I believe as we came so close during the night, she found closure in me and so went forth to persuade me into something I wasn't entirely sure of. I do want to believe I led her on, so please, do not make her out to be a vicious monster, she just needed comfort, that's all"

Soon photographers flash their cameras as reporters ask for more but the protector turns off. My blood pressure rises as I let his last few words fade into my mind.

"I think we should celebrate your performance last night, Prince Nicolai has accepted your apology and we are now back on track with our trading alliances. Ships are crossing the border to collect medicine we desperately need. I believe we can finally bring all this strife to an end and start afresh. I believe Nicolai and Odessa are the perfect match, they'll bring both of our nations together" he presses his snake like lips to his glass and takes another sip of his drink. "Once we have an alliances we can start fresh, perfect timing as your coronation is so soon"

I have so much to say but he continues on, pouring another glass of wine. "I think this is the perfect time to call a toast"

I swallow a lump in my throat as he passes me over a tall glass of wine. He must be joking.

He notices my delayed reaction as I don't hold up my glass. "Come on son! We have never had such a quality time like this together! Often you have been overshadowed with Gerard and the arrival of your younger siblings. Let's not spoil this moment, such a precious moment between a father and his eldest son"

His words cause something to stir inside of me.
He has never said anything like that to me. There is so much more I want to say but his voice of deep compassion, a voice I never thought I'd hear lures me into his sick celebration.

This is a once in a lifetime moment of bonding and I can't spoil it questioning him over the bakery shootings and Prince Nicolai. No, not right now, this is a precious moment I can't waste.

He waits for my approval to clink glasses filled with the delicious, taste bud numbing crimson liquid. As I hold up my glass in the air, he says with pride "To a fresh start"

I believe his words as our glasses clink in unison.

"To a fresh start"

* * * * * * *

My head is spinning after my encounter with Father. The drinks of wine accompanied with fine scotch and beer fill my stomach as nausea creeps in. I try to rush to my bedroom and fling open the door but it takes a few minutes to even find the doorknob.

I don't even make it to the bathroom; I simply fall to my knees and get sick all over my clothes.
The aroma of alcoholic beverages mixed with bile stenches the room. I try to stand up but my poor attempt knocks me to the side of my bed, leaving me toppling into my sheets. My vision is so blurry I can't make sense of anything; everything is a distant blur as buzzing rings into my eyes.

As I am about to drift off to sleep I see a blob of colour before me. I look up "James? Are you alright'?"
I cling to the side of my bed, slack-jawed and slummed over.
"Fine" I manage to mumble through my wine washed lips.

He scrunches his nose to smell the aroma of sick as he steps forward, noticing the sick left on my carpet, once he catches the scent of alcohol, he asks; "James are you drunk?!"

"I'm not drunk how dare you I'm the soberest guy in this room!"

He pinches his nose and he curses. "Damnit James! Can't I have one relaxing night not having to mind you!"he grumbles as he arches forward to grab my shoulders.

"Gerroff me!" I say, swatting my hands towards him.
"I'm ash sober ash 'm gonna git. And nuffink I-" I pause as I let out a loud hiccup- "nuffink you can do 'boutit" And I amble back forward onto the bed, sliding across my sheets causing more of my sick to stain the sheets.

But instantly I get a forceful grip around my arm as Xavier pulls me up. He marches me forward into the bathroom, the sheer light blinding my eyes.

I wince as he starts unbuttoning the top button of my jumper with his delicate fingers.

There is a sense of tension in the air as he lifts off my jumper. He holds me still as I sway my body, telling me to stop in a forceful tone.
I start giggling like a school girl as he lifts off my t-shirt and I am now bare chest. He doesn't glance down to notice my toned torso as he grabs my shoulders, pulling me towards the bath tub in the corner of the bright tangerine tiled room.

The sensation electrifies my entire body as he grabs my shoulders pulling me into the bath. I prefer the shower but at this moment I know I am not in charge.

He turns on the shower head connected and sprays water on my chest, washing away all the grim and sweat as I never showered after my intense workout. I stick out my tongue to catch some droplets, nearly falling as I do. He grumbles and pulls me down to sit in the bath, my pants soaked by the water.

I don't know what overcomes me but I start to sing an old tune mother use to sing to Odessa and I when we were younger. "If all the raindrops were lemon drop and snowdrops oh what a fright that could be.."

"Shut up James! You'll wake everyone!"

"Who cares?! I don't!" I manage to slur.

"They don't care about me. They never did. I'm just a stupid boy who can't do anything right!" I close my eyes as I notice tears starting to fall. I look up to see a flicker of remorse in Xavier's eyes as water splashes on my bare stomach.

"James you shouldn't say that-"

"But it's fucking true!" More tears fall and I wish they could stop but in my state nothing matters. "I'm worthless"

Suddenly I feel a tender hand on my shoulder "Stop it James, you're not worthless"

"You'll never get it" I snap back, my tone sharper than I ever anticipated. Now I can't control my emotions as I start to sob continuously. "I'm ruling a nation that doesn't even seem to like me, what can I do" I let my body slump towards Xavier as I continue to sob angst tears.

He doesn't know how to react to my outburst but he pats me gently on my wet back as I cry. I never thought in my drunkest moments I'd be stuck in a bathtub with my butler washing me as I cry.

As we both sit, letting the shower head echo throughout the room, I finally stop and coax my head upwards to see eyes full of warmth and affection. Eyes I haven't seen in a long time. We simply look at each other for what feels like forever. The silence makes me self conscious but I am unable to look away once our eyes had met.

I get the courage to reach out a hand to his cheek. Xavier looks startled, as if my expression showed intensity but before he could ponder it further, I yank him over and cover my mouth with his in a hungry kiss. He responds immediately, surprising himself. His mouth is so warm, the caress of his lips softer than I ever imagined.

He tastes tentatively with his tongue as I draw in breaths in moments between, sensing he will come back. He does and thank goodness. I have never been kissed like this before and I need more.

It is almost too good to be true until Xavier pushes me away as if he has just been burnt. He jumps away from the bath top and starts pacing back and forth with his hands on his hips.

"That wasn't supposed to have happen" he says in a strangled voice.

"It's okay" I saw, looking down at my wet body. I am afraid of seeming too eager or disappointed. In fact, I am not quite sure how to react in my drunk state, to the kiss or Xavier's show of regret.

"That wasn't right" he says again. "Come let's get you cleaned up"

He takes me gently by the hand and helps me up, avoiding eye contact as he grabs a towel and starts to dry my wet body.

Without any more conversation, I am dried as he helps me into a vest top and ends. I am placed into bed like a small child with nothing else said.

As he tries to clean off my sick, I mumble 'Goodnight Xavier' as I drift off to sleep, consumed by the drowsiness and questioning whether Xavier's heart is beating as fast as mine, or if he is feeling anything akin to the hot fire of desire that has settled in my belly.

Soon I drift off to sleep, intoxicated by what feels like my first ever kiss.

arted_<R

Ah I hope you like this chapter, I can't believe I've gotten this far and I'm actually showing you guys one of my most favourite scenes in Shattered Affection!

I hope you like it! It feels so surreal to think I've come this far from just a simple summer project.

I can't thank you guys so much for all the support. You guys are amazing! ❤❤❤