I wake up to find that Gem isnt next to me . Where the hell could she be right now of all times.

I stand up and pad to the the bathroom and closet. When I dont find her, I head downstairs were I find Charlotte.

"Have you seen her?" I ask.

"Seen who bro?" She asks confused.

"Gemima, have you seen her?" I ask.

"Uh no, she was supposed to be in bed with you." She says and panick settles in me.

I run around the entire house looking for her. When I dont find her I run outside to look for her.

I grab my phone and I start ringing her number while at it.

She isnt picking up. What if they took her as well?

Oh no. Oh fuck no.

I get into my car and I drive around. Hoping I can find her anywhere. But the city is quiet today.

The rain falls on the curbs and doors are closed.

I walk into different cafe shops I know she could go. I look everywhere, even at the nearest complex malls. But nothing.

I ring her phone like a thousand more times.

The frustration causes tears to fall from my eyes.

"Gem!"

I walk back into the house to find Mom and Janice.

"Son, are you okay?" Mom asks.

"She's no where to be found." I sigh. Defeat, and weak.

"Charlotte went to report to the police"

I trudge upstairs.  My heart of all the organs feels the heaviest right now.

The house that used to be so bright when she was here looks so dull. I just stare blankly at everything.

I plop onto the bed and I sit there. Unaware to time until Charlotte asks me to have breakfast. I dont answer.

My mind is now swirling in the worst of places and the darkest parts of my mind are now open.

I've never felt do angry in my entire life.

Not when my mom left me, no. Not when my dad pushed me to be the best at everything I did, no. Not when he left me alone in this world, no.

Not when I found out that my dad's bestfriend is the guy who took my mother away from her family and continued to treat me like his own family, never.

But right now. When I find out that this woman that I'm insufferably in love with is no where to be found.  I am angry.

I am angry at the universe, I am angry at myself, I am angry at her! I'm just angry.

I sit on the bed trying to calm my heavily flaring nose.

When there's a knock on the door.

"Nate? It's me." Her voice says.

I dont say anything. Hoping that she'll leave.

"I know I'm the last person you want to talk to but please have something to eat." She says.

The voice that used to calm me when I was a kid now makes me rage.

I throw a lamp at the wall next to the door.

I can feel her flinching. And then she sobs.

"I'm really sorry Nate, honestly baby." She says before I hear her footsteps leave.

I tuck back into the warmth of the bed. Although it isnt as warm as it used to be.

I sigh.

I dont know when I fell asleep, but I wake up to a silent knock on the door.

"Nate. Please have something to eat. The Hart's are going to look for her okay? Please just eat something." She begs. I dont answer.

Instead I drift back to sleep.

I know its cowardice of me to do so just because when I sleep I dont feel anything. I can just imagine shes next to me and there she will be.

"Nate please. " I hear a silent voice and something scratching against my antic door.

"I messed up son. I know I did." She croaks.

"When I was young, I used to want a fairly tale life. I grew up poor Nathan. My mother worked four jobs.

She was never home and she had six kids. We all had to fend for ourselves. " she says.

"I met Richard and he was this ambitious man. He wanted to do so many things in his life. And I believed in him. I believed in his dreams.

We met in high school, freshman year. And we fell in love. He was from the same background as me but his was worse honey. His mother was abusive. And so was his father.

Together they would hit the kids. That's how Richard lost two of his older siblings. When his sister died, he left.

We were supposed to go to college together and then get married but he left." She says then sighs.

"When he was attending the university in London. I met your father. 

He was the kindest and most chivalrous man I'd ever met and I fell in love with him.

He didnt have money or all of those but he was rich in personality and love." She sighs as if she's longing.

Fuck you mam, you hurt him.

"Your dad wanted to give me a better future and I knew it. I just wasnt patient with him. He married me and took me to a better place than when I lived with my mom.

We had you. You were a blessing to us baby. I was always tired when I came back from waitressing but you and your father would always make me laugh and smile." She chuckles dryly.

I scoff. Why is she still talking?

"But I wasnt satisfied. I wanted more money. Richard came back from London and he found out I was married and we had you.

He reached out to me and we started hanging out as friends again. I realised that I still loved him, but I loved your father more.

I introduced him to your father hoping that he would back down but he didnt. They became bestfriends and I then couldnt rid of him.

I told Nathaniel multiple times that he is no good. But he just assumed that I was having an affair and that's why I didnt want them to be friends." She says then pauses.

"Richard started getting richer and richer until he was basically supporting you.

That's when I realised that he could give me the life that I wanted.  So I left. He didnt want me to come with you, he said I should leave you with Nathaniel.

I thought that as time went on he'd accept you into his home but I was wrong." She says.

So she chose a lifestyle over her own child. Beautiful innit?

"He helped your father purchase that farm and to my surprise Nathaniel got successful very quickly.

I wanted to go and see you one day, when he got handsy with me. I told him I'd divorce him and tell Nathaniel that he is the one who took me away but he wouldnt have it.

So he beat me. He would hit me whenever I mentioned your name. And mind you I was pregnant.

When your sister Natalia was born, he stopped." She sighs.

I have a sister?

" I was no longer happy.  I contacted you dad and I told him everything. At first he was mad at me. He was pissed.

But then he started to warm up to it. He wanted me to be happy.

He would sneak some gifts of mine to you.

When Richard found out, he stopped talking to your father and hit me worse.

I wanted to come back to you baby. I wanted to come back to your father." She cries.

"But I couldnt . He didnt allow me to. He kept me hidden.

Calling me by some stupid name, Pumkin to my co-wives. I'd never seen him so happy until your father died.

He and Margo beat me until the tears I cried for Nathaniel were my only comfort. I gave birth to my son Jamie and after that they stopped hitting me.

I tried to escape on many accounts but Rickelle reminded me that he could easily hurt you if I did. I'm sorry. I thought I was doing what was best for you by staying." She says.

Then she cries by the door.

So my dad knew about her whereabouts ? I have a brother and sister? And she was abused in that family?

That has nothing to do with Gemima. I'll cry about it later.

"You know son. That girl is exactly what Nathaniel would have wanted for you.

I remember at Soraya's wedding, when Soraya mentioned you, her eyes lit up brighter than possible. And everytime she would visit, her smile would be brighter than diamonds when she spoke about you.

I'd really love the two of you got together when you find her and my grandchild." She says.

I have to find her.