Quinn Peterson

September 14th, 2018

The days following my trip to St. George Island were interesting to say the least. Cassandra and I only seemed to start to hang out more after that. From the moment I woke up, my phone was buzzing from her text messages. We'd text all day until we finally hung out for hours on end. I hardly spent any time with my friends or family because of it. I mean I'd get teased by all of them about Cassandra practically being my girlfriend. But I stood by the statement of us just being good friends.

"Last time I hung out with a friend that much, I ended up dating her."

Josh always had his way with words. The friend he was referring to was obviously my sister, Danielle. Ever since the two of them got back together, it's been strange. The way things ended between Josh and Jessica wasn't good. I remember the day she came to me, venting the whole story to me. Josh was my best friend, but even then it was hard to stand by him. It could've been worse, he could've cheated on her with Danielle, instead he did the right thing in breaking up with her first. I mean it was still dirty, Jessica clearly had feelings for Josh. The same way Cassandra clearly had feelings for me.

I'd been struggling with trying to avoid all of her signals. Like how she would sometimes hold my hand when we were hanging out. The way she practically leaned into me all the time, as if begging to be cuddled. There were also many times we had conversations about sex. For a virgin, Cassandra sure liked to talk a lot about sex. She mostly just brought up the things her friends told her, how jealous she was. I couldn't help but feel as if she wanted something out of those conversations. I mean for the most part, I just listened to her, sex was the last thing on my mind. But Cassandra, she talked about it like she wanted to have it, with someone like me.

I imagined many scenarios where I'd have to turn her down. I didn't want it to come to that, everytime we hung out I prayed she didn't advance too much. The truth was that I really enjoyed having Cassandra as a friend, I didn't want to lose that. But if her and I kept going down this road, it's only gonna end with her eventually confessing her feelings. I already know she has feelings, it's only a matter of time until she tells me. The thought of friendzoning her, the thought of making everything awkward, I couldn't allow it. Hopefully she's smart to understand I couldn't be with her, not right now, maybe not ever.

Cassandra and I had plans to go watch a movie at the theater a few blocks away from the school. But I've been trying to think of ways to bail out of it. We were honestly spending too much time together. Maybe that's how I could prevent the inevitable, maybe I could send my own signals back at her.

The warm sunlight was beginning to seep through my blinds, shining right into my eyes. I rolled over in my bed and grabbed my phone off of my nightstand. Upon unlocking it I saw the three messages in my notifications, all from three different people.

Good morning :)

I think I forgot my hoodie at your dorm.

We need to talk.

The last message caught my eye the most, it was from Isiah. I squinted at the message and noticed it was sent a few minutes ago. Before I could even type a response I heard a knock at my door. I placed my phone back on my nightstand, I'll have to text the other two back later. I stood up from my bed and threw on a shirt before answering it. I opened the door to see Danielle standing there with Isiah a few feet behind her. I took a deep breath and walked past her and over to my dorm's kitchen.

"You know, normal people say things like 'Good morning' or 'Hello' when they see their siblings." Danielle said eyeing me as I grabbed some orange juice out of my fridge.

"Or to human beings in general." Isiah added.

I cracked a smile and turned to grab a glass out of the cabinet next to me. I took a peek at the clock on the microwave and saw that it was 2:43 pm.

"It's not exactly morning is it?"

"We need to talk." Isiah said.

I poured myself a glass of orange juice and looked back at both of them. "I got your message."

I took my glass of orange juice and walked over to my couch in the living room. I took a sip before setting the glass on the small table beside the couch.

I patted the cushions of the couch before sitting down. "Lets talk then."

"You know what this is right?" Danielle asked taking a sit beside me.

I rolled my eyes. "Yes Danny I know what this is."

It had been a while, a couple months actually, since the last time we had a sibling meeting like this. Any time one of us had a serious problem that needed discussing, we all three got together and talked it out. Only most of the time I had some idea of what we would be talking about. I was left completely in the dark on this occasion. I rubbed my eyes and looked at Isiah who had sat down in the chair in front of the couch.

"What is this about?"

"Our baby brother has relationship problems." Danielle said. Her lips curling into a coy smile, trying hard to resist laughing.

"Shut up." Isiah said smiling to himself. "I'm an adult now."

I shrugged. "Still a baby to us."

"Sheesh you both are to me." Danielle said crossing her arms.

I shook my head and waved her off. "Let's not get into this. Isiah what's going on? You and Alice seemed fine the last time I saw you guys together."

The room suddenly grew quiet, Isiah just sat there staring at the floor. His hands were a bit shaky and it seemed like he was sweating a bit. It wasn't abnormal for him to get nervous and even shy in front of us. He was the youngest out of the three of us, it made sense for him to feel a bit embarrassed. However, I still had no clue what the hell he was embarrassed about.

"Isiah it's ok, you can tell us." Danielle said. Her tone was soothing, she was clearly in mom mode now.

"I umm......Alice and I......" He trailed off. His foot began tapping on the floor, another sign of something wrong.

"You didn't break up did you?"

"No we....we're good it's just....." He looked back up at us. "I'm a good boyfriend right?"

I felt my brow furrow as I reached over my glass of orange juice. "What kind of question is that?"

"Isiah of course you are." Danielle said elbowing me in the side. "Why would you ask that?"

I rubbed my side. "Ummm....ow!"

"I don't know, this past couple of weeks Alice has been acting weird." He said shaking his head a bit. There was something off about him, he was holding something back.

I took a sip of my juice. "Isiah cut the shit! We're your family, you have to be straight up with us. If not us, then who else?" I sat my drink back down. "What's happening with you two?"

"Ok well you see Alice and I have recently started having....well you know." He said nodding a bit.

"Jesus just say sex." Danielle said leaning back in her seat. "We're all adults here."

"Ok fine! We've been having sex." He said stomping his foot.

"Wait a second!" I snapped my fingers. "Was she your first?"

"Yes." He said avoiding eye contact with both of us.

"And you didn't tell me!" Danielle said throwing her arms in the air.

"Fuck you!" I shouted at her before turning to Isiah with my arms outstretched. "You didn't tell me?! Your own brother?!"

"Ok I get it!" He shouted back. "Fuck! I'm not a kid anymore, I don't have to tell you guys everything."

"That's what siblings are for Isiah." Danielle said clenching the cushions of the couch.

I ran my palm across my face. "Jesus Christ don't tell me you tried something stupid. Did you put it in the wrong hole?"

"What?!" He asked almost falling out of his seat.

"Because I've been there before." I shrugged.

"Ew!" He cringed.

"Oh my god will you shut the hell up and let him explain what's wrong!" Danielle snapped elbowing me again.

I raised my hands. "Alright alright."

"Isiah, what happened?" Danielle asked.

His eyes fell to the floor again, this time he went quiet for a while. Even though we were family, it was still hard to explain personal issues to each other. Danielle for one could be pretty judgmental and I'd be lying if I said I couldn't be too. But we trusted each other and in the end that's what should've matter more.

"Things were going well with Alice and I." Isiah said keeping his eyes away from us. "I mean we've only had sex a few times, but......I feel like I'm not.....performing well enough."

I rolled my eyes and refrained from laughing. "Oh brother."

"Isiah what do you mean by that?" Danielle asked before cupping her hand around her mouth. "Are you finishing too fast?"

"What?!" He yelped shaking his head. "No not like that, I just think Alice and I aren't on the same page. I think....I think she wants me to like.....hurt her."

That caught me off guard, my eyes nearly bulged out of their sockets before I could even grab my juice again. I looked back at Isiah and saw him staring at Danielle and I with almost puppy like eyes. I checked to see Danielle's reaction and per usual, she was still in mom mode. Her posture and demeanor was much more concerning and sympathetic than mine. I was still shocked to hear my little brother was no longer a virgin. Now to hear that his girlfriend was into some rough shit, well that was just the cherry on top. I took a sip of my juice before sucking my teeth.

"What do you mean by hurt?"

"It's obvious isn't it?" Danielle asked lying her head on my shoulder. "Alice is a freak."

I chuckled into my glass before finishing the rest of my juice. "Freak with a capital F."

"Not helping guys." Isiah said running his hands through his hair. "What the hell am I supposed to do?"

I shrugged. "Whatever she wants."

"What?"

I looked down at Danielle. "I mean it's always worked out in my case."

"That is the dumbest shit I've ever heard come out your mouth." Danielle said looking up at me.

I felt my lips curl up into a toothy grin. "I could think of a lot worse."

"GUYS!" Isiah shouted.

We both turned our heads. "Yeah?"

"What do I do?" He asked.

I held a hand out and leaned forward. "Ok in all honesty man, just ask her to be straight up with you. Girls like subtly, but guys are too dumb for that. Sometimes you just need them to say it to your face."

"That's great advice Quinn." Danielle said in a mocking tone.

I placed a hand on my chest. "Why thank you."

"If only it wasn't the second dumbest thing you've said today." Danielle said nudging my arm.

I reared back and scooted away from her. "Ow! Danny you are this close to being punted out the front door."

"Isiah, what kind of things is she doing?" Danielle asked completely ignoring my fake threat.

"Sometimes she like.....moves my hands around for me, like she'll put them on her neck or sometimes her ass." Isiah said rubbing the back of his neck. "I mean I understand some of it, but I feel like she tries roughhousing me sometimes."

I cocked an eyebrow. "Roughhousing?"

"Yeah like....ok last week she ruined one of shirts." He said cringing a bit. "I mean she practically ripped it off my body."

"Oh." I looked over at Danielle who had the same look of surprise as me. "Ohhhhhhhhh."

"I don't know what to do guys." He said rubbing his arm, trailing his hand up his shoulder. "I really like Alice but......maybe I'm not cut out for that kind of shit."

"Isiah don't be ridiculous." Danielle said standing up from her spot. She walked over and sat down on the arm of Isiah's chair. "Listen, it may seem odd and sort of wrong, but it's a completely normal side of sex. Alice obviously wants you to be more assertive in the bedroom, so be that."

"Assertive?" He asked. Like he had never heard the word before.

"You know like......dominant." Danielle said in a low and husky tone.

I sighed and slumped back into my couch. "Danny don't tell me you got back into reading those books again."

"What? It's exactly what he needs to learn about." Danielle said glancing over at me, that sly grin on her face.

"Learn about what?" Isiah asked.

"I have a book." Danielle said placing her hands on his shoulders. "It'll teach you everything you need to know. It'll teach you to be more dominant in the bedroom."

"What's it called?" Isiah asked.

"50 Shades of Rape." I chuckled through my teeth.

"IT IS NOT!" Danielle shouted.

I pointed my finger at both of them. "You tell Isiah to read that and he'll be trying to tie Alice to the bed by the end of the week."

"That is not what the book is about!" Danielle scolded in my direction.

I crossed my arms. "Yes it is."

"It is an emotional journey about a woman coming to terms with her own sexuality." Danielle argued.

I held my mouth and only laughed harder along with Isiah. "It's a story about a shy girl who ends up getting raw dogged by some rich CEO."

Isiah slumped over the chair and ended up on the floor from all of his laughing. I held my stomach and laughed into the couch cushion. I heard Danielle audibly pouting as Isiah and I laughed for a good five minutes straight. We were too busy laughing to notice Shaun walking through the front door of my dorm. We all paused and looked over at his wide-eyed confused face. He just froze in his place, hand still on the doorknob.

"Ummm.....should I come back later?" He asked taking a back step.

"No no stay.....we were just having a little sibling meeting." Danielle said taking a few deep breaths, smile still shining bright.

"Oh alright." He said closing the door behind himself. "Hey Isiah I passed Alice in the courtyard, she said to call her."

"Ah shit." Isiah said rubbing his eyes with his palms.

"What is it?" Danielle asked.

"I've totally been ignoring for the past three days." He said pulling out his phone.

"Thirteen missed calls?" Danielle asked peering over his shoulder. "Isiah you have to call her."

"I know I know, I just don't know what to say." He said staring at his phone.

"Just......." Danielle paused and placed her hand on his shoulder. "Just let her know that you love her. Start there."

Isiah looked up at her and then back at his phone. "Ok."

Without another word he got up from his seat and left the dorm entirely. I smiled a bit at the fact my little brother was all grown up now. I never I thought I'd see the day he'd be dealing with girl problems, that was usually my thing. I watched as Shaun and Danielle left the dorm as well only a few minutes later. Something about them having to work on a project together. That left me alone in the room by myself, alone and in the dark. Danielle had cut the lights off before leaving, the only light left was the sunlight coming through the blinds. I stared at my empty glass of what used to be filled with orange juice. It perfectly represented my life at this moment, it used to be filled with color, now it was empty.

I shook the thought away and walked back into my bedroom. I looked over at my phone which was currently vibrating against my wooden nightstand. I looked down at the picture of a smiling Cassandra Winters, the contact photo I chose for her number. I made the tough choice to ignore it, I needed to take a shower and get dressed. Conversations with Cassandra tended to get away from me. A call with her could last five minutes or an hour. I needed to get my day started, I was already off to a late start. I heard my phone ringing again as I turned the handle on my shower.

After I cleaned myself I ended up in my bedroom again, looking through my closet. I didn't even bother checking my phone, I didn't need to see how many times I ignored Cassandra. I got myself dressed in a plain white t-shirt and a pair of faded blue jeans. I looked down at the foot of my closet where my shoes where neatly aligned. I settled on a pair of all white Air Jordan 1s. After tucking in the laces I went back over to my phone and checked the notifications. A couple missed calls from Cassandra and even a few messages. I decided against opening them, it would only tempt me into talking to her. Instead I checked the rest of my unread messages and saw one from Shaun. I opened it up and saw a picture of Brianna and I with a message underneath it.

Found this in my camera roll, don't know how it ended up there, just thought you'd like to see it.

I stared long and hard at the picture, Brianna's smile was something I could stare at for hours. Shaun may not have known how this picture got there, but I sure do.

April 16th, 2017

Spring break hasn't exactly gone the way everyone expected. The plan was for all of us to meet up at Daytona beach, rent a few rooms, and party all week. But things don't always go as planned, like how the place we were hoping to stay at was overbooked, or how Isiah got sick as a dog two days into our stay. So our plan at staying at a nice hotel turned into the six of us being cramped into one motel room with only two beds. But even with all of that, it still went down as one of the best spring breaks of my life. I mean there was something humble about drinking knock-off bud lights and hanging around a campfire at the beach. Sure it sucked that Isiah was bedridden for almost the entire trip. And yeah it was stupid to have to sleep on the floor most nights, but we were happy.......I was happy.

Tonight was like most since we got here, we spent all day at the day the beach, went back to the room for a few hours, and now we were getting drunk around a campfire. I was on my fourth beer while the others were currently playing "never have I ever". I looked over at Brianna who had been resting her head against my shoulder for the past fifteen minutes. It was no surprise to see her not drinking anything at all, 2017 was a sober year for Brianna. I looked up at Danielle who was easily the drunkest out of everyone here, no surprise there either.

"N-Never....have I ever........" Danielle held up her hand and downed the rest of her can. ".......had sex in a car."

"That's such a lie." Josh snickered.

I tossed my empty beer can at him. "Oh yeah how would you know?"

"Just an assumption." He said shrugging his shoulders before taking a sip of his beer.

"Oooh ok Josh." Shaun said before taking a swig of his beer. "Who's the lucky girl?"

"Forget that." Josh said pointing right at him. "Who the fuck did you manage to hook up with in a car?"

"Uh uh ah." Shaun said wagging his finger. "That ain't the rules of the game."

"Hey!" Danielle shouted at Brianna and I. "What about you two?"

"Do we really have to answer that?" Brianna asked.

I placed my arm around her and chuckled. "I think we answer by drinking."

"Well no one's stopping you." She said handing me a cold beer can.

I cracked the can open and took a sip. "I guess you're right."

"Your turn Josh." Shaun said looking over at him.

"Hmmmmm......never have I ever......went skinny dipping." Josh said smiling right at Danielle.

"Now look who's lying?" Danielle said with a devilish grin on her face.

"Is it just me or is there a tension between those two?" Brianna whispered into my ear.

I almost choked on my beer and spit the rest out of my mouth. "What kind of tension?"

"You know.....bowchickawowow." She said shimmying her shoulders a bit.

I held back a laugh and instead looked over at Danielle and Josh, both still smiling at eachother. "No there's no way, Danielle is not Josh's type."

"I don't knowwwww, the way she's looks at him-" She leaned closer to my ear and ran her hand up my leg. "-is the same way I look at you everyday."

I leaned my head towards her and placed a kiss on her temple. "You know we're all sharing one room right?"

"So?" She asked planting a kiss on my neck.

I looked back at the others to see them too occupied with their drunken laughter to notice us. "So we don't exactly have a private place to go to."

"Ummm have you noticed, we're at the beach." She said grabbing my hand. "We have miles of privacy."

I raised an eyebrow and looked back at her. "You serious? You want to do it on the beach?"

"Why not?" She asked tilting her head. "We both could use it after such a long day."

I nodded and squeezed her hand. "We're gonna have to find a way to ditch these fools then."

"Hey guys!" Brianna said raising her voice. "Quinn and I are gonna call it a night."

"Awww really?" Josh asked. "The fun was just getting started."

I stood up along with Brianna. "Yeah well the three of you can have fun."

"If you say so." Danielle said winking at me.

I pointed my finger right at her. "Not that kind of fun!"

"Come on Quinn." Brianna said tugging at my hand.

I pointed at Josh and Shaun. "I mean it!"

"Oh come on!" Brianna repeated whilst grabbing a rolled up towel from the beach bag.

I watched as they waved goodbye to Brianna and I as we walked further down the beach. The path to the motel was to our right but we had other plans. Brianna and I walked for a good thirty minutes just basking in the soft moonlight. By the time we stopped walking, the campfire our friends were at was a mere glimmer in the distance. I took one last look at the bright full moon before I was yanked to the ground. Without a word Brianna's lips were on mine. I didn't even get a chance to check if the coast was completely clear, I guess she already had.

I felt her straddle my waist as my hands slid up her thighs and settled on her waist. I leaned up and moved my lips to her neck, god we needed to ditch these clothes. But first we had to roll out the towel, unless we wanted sand in places it didn't belong. In the middle of me fiddling with Brianna's shirt, my ears perked up at the sound of a phone ringing. It was Brianna's of course, I guess our friends were missing us already. But when Brianna pulled it out of her pocket her brow furrowed as she stared at it.

"What is it?"

"This isn't my phone." She said.

I looked at the screen and saw the that person calling was Brianna herself. "Who's phone is it then?"

"Oh my god, its my fucking brother's." She groaned, face palming herself.

I laughed a bit while falling back on to the sand. "I told you two not to buy the same case."

"It was buy one get one free." She said rolling her eyes. I felt her head rest against my chest as she opened the camera app on the phone.

I propped myself up on my elbows. "What are you doing?"

"Capturing the moment." She said looking up at me.

"With your brother's phone."

"Shhhh....just smile for me." She said leaning her head against me.

There was no point in arguing with her, I'm sure it was harmless. Shaun was always good at taking a joke. So I did what I was told and smiled at the camera. Brianna looked up at me, her doe-eyed gaze staring right through me. I wrapped my arms around her tightly and pulled her further up my body. Our foreheads met, our lips were inches apart, and just like that..... the moment was officially captured with a flash.

September 21st, 2018

If I shut my eyes I could find myself right back in that moment. The soothing sounds of the ocean, the luminescent moonlight, and the beautiful girl in my arms. All of it came rushing back to me the moment I saw the picture. I had been looking at it all day, there were no bad memories there. Just like Cassandra and I had discussed, only the positives. I chuckled a few times at the thought of how oblivious Shaun must've been. He had no idea what Brianna did only moments after that picture was taken. If he had, it would probably ruin the entire picture.

This was the fourteenth time I had looked at it today. I had definitely been keeping count, I wanted to see if it would get old, it didn't. I looked up from my phone, I was in a booth at Austin's Café currently. I had no real reason for coming here, I didn't even order a coffee, I probably should've. I just needed a reason to get out of my dorm. Some fucked up part of me thinks it was to avoid Cassandra, the other part thinks it was just to get some air. Yeah that's what it was, a reason just to get air.

"This seat taken?"

I looked up and saw Adrian's roommate, Riley, standing next to my booth. I hadn't seen her since my last visit to Adrian's apartment a few weeks ago. I don't know why I was so surprised by seeing her. Maybe it was her outfit, nothing but a pair of blue skinny jeans and a long-sleeved white crop top. Her shoes got me off guard especially, because they were the exact same ones I was wearing. I noticed I had been staring too long and I think she did too. Because without me giving an answer she sat down across from me.

"So.....what brings you here?" She asked resting her head on the palms of her hands.

I tucked my phone away and shook my head. "No reason, just needed to get out of my dorm."

"I get that, it can get boring there I assume?" She asked looking up at me.

"You have no idea."

"I think I do." She said shifting her gaze to the window. "Adrian probably didn't tell you, but the reason I'm her roommate now, is because I was her roommate back in rehab."

I tried my hardest to hide my surprised reaction. "Oh....yeah she didn't mention that."

"No surprise there." She said watching the cars drive by. "I've heard a lot about you however, Quinn."

Again, I tried to hide my reaction. "You have?"

"Oh yeah, for the past few weeks Adrian hardly shuts up about you." She said glancing over at me.

"Really?"

"Well honestly it was just the past few days." She said lowering her gaze. "You must've been packing some heat down there."

I chuckled a bit and crossed my arms. "My eyes are up here."

"Are they?" She asked looking up at me. "I hardly noticed. Hard to believe you're single with the way she talks about you."

"Look I'm flattered, but I'm sure Adrian has also explained to you why I'm still single."

"Oh hush it, I'm not here to flirt." She said giggling to herself a bit.

"Why are you here?"

"Simple." She said looking over at a man approaching our table. "I'm on a date."

I turned my head and almost chuckled a bit out loud. "A what?"

"Hey Riley, I got you your latte the way you asked for it." The man said sitting beside her.

He looked about our age, short black curly hair, dressed like a total hipster. He reminded me of the kids in the AV club back in highschool. He even wore a saggy beanie just like them.

"TJ, this Adrian's friend Quinn." Riley said motioning between us. "Quinn this is my neighbor TJ."

"So this is the Quinn I've heard so much about?" He asked holding his hand out.

I nodded and shook his hand. "Apparently so."

"Well I will say it's nice to finally put a face to the name." He said putting his arm around Riley." She's been telling me you looked like Stamos."

I leaned back in my booth and laughed out loud. "I guess we're both disappointed."

"So what brings you here?" He asked looking around. "Besides the hospitality I mean?"

"Well......nothing honestly. Just needed some space I guess."

"Space from what exactly?" He asked.

"Not what, but whom?" Riley asked leaning her head against TJ's shoulder.

"Nobody in particular." I lied. "Just needed space from it all you know, college can be draining at times."

"Quinn I don't know you at all, but I know a liar when I see one." TJ said. That got a laugh out of Riley, everything this guy said got a reaction out of her. New couples are always so weird.

"He's right you know." She said catching her breath.

I turned my body and placed my feet in the aisle. "Look I don't wanna intrude on your guys' date. So I'm just gonna-"

"Quinn?"

"Oh you gotta be kidding me."

I stood up and turned around, I was afraid to look up because I knew who's voice that was. I felt a hand push against my shoulder and my eyes shot up. I was instantly met the iridescent green eyes of Cassandra Winters. I guess this was god's way of getting payback, the one person I wanted to avoid today, just so happened to find me trying to avoid them. I mean I was an asshole for not answering any of her texts or calls. I could lie and pretend I didn't see any of them, but Cassandra was smart, she'd see right through that. None of this would've happened if I wasn't so hard on myself.

Every other guy would've jumped at the opportunity to date Cassandra. According to her, many guys have tried, and she turned them all down. Somehow she saw something special in me, and I responded by trying to shut her out. Why did she have to be so beautiful? Why did she have to be so easy to hang out with? Why were we so alike? I didn't deserve her friendship, she's been nothing but nice to me and I've only repaid her by being an asshole. Even with my behavior, she still manged to smile at me, like I was the only person who mattered to her. It was the smile I grown used to seeing these past few weeks.

"Hey Quinn." She said.

Her voice was soft, comforting in all the right ways. I was still frozen, unable to form words, it was like I was hypnotized. Maybe it was her eyes, they way they lit up when she stared at me. And of course today had to be the day she wore a tight pair of blue jeans that hugged her curves just right. A white crop top that showed off her perfect midsection. I should've known better than to look down, all white converse. I trailed my eyes back up to her eyes, still gazing right at me.

"Hey Cassie."

"You are without a doubt the most confusing guy I have ever met." She said sucking her teeth.

I cracked a smile. "I know."

"Still down to go see that movie?" She asked.

I looked down at her hand pressed against my shoulder, slowly taking it in my hand. "Sure."

"What movie you guys going to see?" Riley asked.

I looked back at them. "Oh uh....the theater is doing like a throwback kind of night. So uh.....you know full disclosure I don't even like musi-"

"We're gonna go see Hello Dolly!" Cassandra said enthusiastically.

"I was getting to that!"

"Hello Dolly? Never heard of it." TJ said looking at Riley. "What do you think?"

"Why the hell not?" Riley asked. "Better than that dumb action movie we were gonna go see."

"The Predator has some pretty good reviews, I'll have you know." TJ argued.

"Everyone and their grandmother said it was shit." Riley said running her hand through TJ's curly hair.

I held a hand up. "Wait wait wait.......you two wanna come with us?"

"Why not?" Riley asked shrugging her shoulders. "I mean TJ and I were going to the movies anyway."

"Huh......well ok."

"I mean....if you two are ok with that?" Riley asked. "Don't want to intrude on your date."

I shook my head and looked at Cassandra and saw her doing the same thing. "Oh we're not-"

"We're not a couple." Cassandra said blushing a bit.

"Could've fooled me." TJ said.

I crossed my arms and tried my best to refrain from blushing too. "Well we're not so........"

"Fine....still a double date." Riley said sliding out of the booth along with TJ.

"I just said-"

"Double date Quinn!" Riley said pushing past me.

"I like her." Cassandra whispered into my ear.

I smirked. "Someone has to."

"That's what I'm here for." TJ said following Riley outside.

Cassandra and I were alone now, I felt like I had to explain to her why I ignored her all day. I let go of her hand and stared into her bright green eyes. I opened my mouth to say words, but they never came out. I only stood there just staring at her. However, not a single word needed to be said. Her eyes told the whole story, she raised her arms and slowly wrapped them around me. I pulled her into an embrace and felt right at home. It made sense, having her in my arms. But I couldn't hold her, not like I held..........

"Brianna."

Her name lingered on my lips, like somehow it would bring her back. I'd say her name every minute of every day if it brought her back. Just the thought of her was enough to make my eyes feel watery. I shook the feeling away, I couldn't cry....not in front of Cassandra.

"I know Quinn, I'm so sorry. I just get a little too comfortable sometimes and caught up in the moment and-"

"No!" I pulled away to meet her eyes. "It's not your fault....it's mine. I.....I'm just really bad at this."

"At what?" She asked.

I lowered my eyes. "Explaining what's wrong with me."

"You don't have to explain anything to me Quinn." She said holding my hand. "I understand."

I closed my eyes and tightened my grip around her hand. "Cassie I'm sorry for ignoring you today. I don't know what's wrong with me."

"Quinn it's fine." She said sliding her other hand up to my chest. "I forgive you ok. Besides, you're gonna make it up to me by paying for my ticket."

My eyes flew open in an instant. "That hardly seems fair."

"Seems perfectly fair to me. You ignored me for reasons unknown, now you get to pay for my movie ticket." She said smiling from cheek to cheek.

I smiled and let go of her hand. "You know the funny part is......I would've paid for it anyway."

"I know." She said before ruffling my hair a bit.

"You two coming?" Riley asked poking her head around the corner.

I rolled my eyes and took Cassandra's hand again, following right behind Riley and TJ. The movie theater wasn't far, it was within the same plaza as Austin's. Along the way I eventually let go of Cassandra's hand, that didn't stop her from trying to grab it again a few times. Even while waiting in line to buy the tickets. The theater was about as busy as I expected, being a weekday and all. TJ and Riley were interesting to watch the entire time, new couples always acting a certain way. They didn't seem like they were new to eachother however, being neighbors of course. But the manner of which they spoke and acted towards one another, they looked happy. I remembered what it was like to be that happy. Spending so much time with someone you were falling head over heels for. There was no other feeling in the world like it.

The line at the concessions was surprisingly shorter than the line for tickets. One large popcorn and box of skittles later, we were in our seats watching the previews. It was kind of interesting to see old previews for movies back in the late 60s. Movies like The Sound of Music, The Graduate, and 2001: A Space Odyssey. Isiah and I went through a phase where we actually liked watching such old films as those. Danielle used to always tease us about being old men on the inside, maybe she was on to something.

"What is this movie about again?" Riley asked sitting down in the seat to my right.

"You've never heard of the Hello Dolly broadway musical?" Cassandra asked in the seat to my left.

"What? Do I look like I was born in the 60s?" Riley asked nearly leaning over me.

"It's about a matchmaker named Dolly." Cassandra explained.

"Matchmaker?" Riley asked.

"You know, like a love guru of sorts. Anyways, this movie is about her trying to find a match for some rich millionaire, whilst also finding love herself." Cassandra explained further.

"Seems romantic." TJ said sitting down next to Riley. A large popcorn and soda in his hands. "But why would a millionaire need to find love? Man's already rich.

"Money can't buy everything TJ." Riley said leaning her head on his shoulder.

"I guess." He said holding the tub of popcorn. "Popcorn anyone?"

I held up the tub I already had in my lap. "Oh we're good."

"Don't worry about them TJ." Riley said staring up at the large screen in front of us. "They've got all the company they need."

"Remind me again why we chose to sit so close." TJ said.

"TJ?" Riley asked looking up at him.

"Yeah?" He smiled.

Without any sign or warning, Riley leaned up and kiss him straight on the lips. By the look in his eyes, I could tell it was their first. I felt Cassandra nudge against my shoulder as the weight of her head came down on it. I glanced down to see her holding back a laugh. We both watched as Riley pulled away slowly from TJ, both of them locked on to each others eyes.

"Just watch the damn movie please." Riley said before giving him a quick peck on the lips.

"Yeah.....alright." TJ said turning his attention to the screen.

Riley then leaned in and whispered something into his ear. Whatever it was, it made nearly choke on the popcorn in his mouth. I laughed along with Cassandra as the previews subsided and the movie began. Just as the studio's logos ended, Cassandra's breath tickled my ear.

"Too bad these two are here, I'd much rather kiss you somewhere else." She whispered into my ear.

"WHAT?!" I yelled.

"Shhhhhh...I'm tryna watch this." Riley said nudging against my other shoulder.

"Sorry." I whispered before turning my head to Cassandra. "What?"

"That's what she whispered into his ear." Cassandra laughed into my shoulder. "You should've seen your face."

I rolled my eyes and pinched the bridge of my nose. "Damn near gave me a heart attack."

"Wait a minute!" TJ exclaimed.

I looked over and saw his seat reclining back. He looked like a kid on Christmas, way too happy over the simplest thing. He raised the cupholder up and hooked his arm around Riley. I looked back up at the movie which was beginning with a big musical number. The honest truth was I wasn't a huge fan of musicals, actually I hated them. Yet I was still always dragged to them, whether it be the ones at my old highschool or in downtown Orlando. Brianna really loved watching them, then again she loved everything. About as twice as much as I did, hell I couldn't even love her as much she loved me.

"Wait! Where did that come from?"

"Was that even about Brianna? Or someone else?"

I looked over at Cassandra who had moved away from me a bit, leaning her head against the reclined headrest. The movie played on in the background as I took in the sight that was Cassandra Winters. Where did she come from? Girls didn't look like her in Florida, only in movies, or in dreams. She made a fucking sundress look fantastic on her, a fucking sundress! I needed to get out of here, my thoughts were going to a bad place. I needed to leave before-

"Quinn?"

I blinked a few times before rubbing my eyes a bit. "Yeah?"

"You ok?" She asked.

"Yeah yeah I'm fine. Why what's up?"

"You've been staring at me for most of the movie." She said smiling from ear to ear. Even with the dark theater, I could still see the red in her cheeks.

I shook my head and laid back against my reclined seat. "Sorry sorry it's just........I don't know."

"Well you're missing the best part of the movie." She said looking back up at the screen.

I followed her gaze. "What part?"

  The character Irene was singing a song with Cornelius. I hadn't been paying any attention the whole time, I had no forgotten how they met or who they were to eachother. But boy did they both have some vocal chords on them.

He held me, For an instant.

But his arms, felt safe and strong.

It only, Takes a moment,

"What a second.....is this the song from Wall-E?" TJ asked pointing up at the screen.

To be loved,

A whole life long.

"Shhhh.....this is the best part." Cassandra said clasping her hands together, staring up at the screen with her wide doe eyes.

And that is all, that loves about.

I stared up at the two characters on the screen. "They seem.....happy."

"They're not just happy, they're in love." Cassandra said.

And we'll recall, when time runs out...

I looked back at over Cassandra, I probably shouldn't have. Her eyes were glancing over at Riley and TJ kissing. Only to be interrupted by mine. There was a special twinkle in them this time, something I've never seen in them before. I followed her eyes down to our hands, our fingers laced together. How did they get like that? I didn't remember grabbing her hand, it was like.....pure instinct.

That it only,

Cassandra's other hand came up to caress my cheek. Her hand was soft and warm, just like her. Her eyes were closer now, because our faces were closer. How did they get like that? I didn't even move an inch but yet I was moving closer to her. It was like gravity was pulling us together. Her eyes weren't on mine anymore, they lowered to my lips. I couldn't be upset, my eyes were doing the same thing. Fuck we were both thinking the same thing. She was going to kiss me, her eyes fluttered closed as she was mere centimeters away from my lips.

Took a moment,

I couldn't move, I couldn't hold back, I knew I needed to stop, I had to stop. But I didn't want to, I didn't want to not kiss her. I didn't want to pretend anymore, pretend like I don't feel something for her, I do. But...I couldn't do it, as much as I wanted to, I couldn't do that to.........

"Fuck I'm sorry Cassandra!"

I shot up out of my seat and scooted past Riley and TJ, too busy making out to notice. I didn't even look back, I knew if I did it would crush me. I walked around to the ramp that led to the door of the theater.

To be loved,

Before I left I looked back up at the rows of seats. All of the eyes were up on the screen, except for two, they were busy looking down at me. Those beautiful bright green eyes, the eyes that I left alone in her seat. Those eyes would be the death of me, I knew it. I knew I would fall for them, it wasn't a matter of if but when. But not today, not right now. For the four thousandth time, I had to walk away from those beautiful green eyes. I had to leave them alone.

A whole life long

I covered my ears as I pushed open the double doors. I couldn't hear anymore of that stupid fucking song. It made sense for a song written in the 60s, love doesn't work like that. It takes a lot more than a fucking moment to love someone.

"God I'm starting to think like my sister."

I made my way out of the building, wiping the sweat forming on forehead. I found a bench on the sidewalk and took a seat on the end of it. I needed air, I needed a moment to myself. That was without a doubt the closest I ever gotten to kissing another girl.....since Brianna.

I thought I would have more self control, I guess I was wrong. The truth is that there hasn't really been anyone since Brianna. I haven't exactly put myself out there since her passing. Cassandra was the first girl to ever show interest in me in over a year. Of course she had to be one of the most gorgeous creatures put on this earth. How else could it be any harder to resist? She was funny, cute, unbelievable understanding and kind, and she was just......she was just like me. A good person held down by the loss of a loved one. It held both of us down, anyone could see it. The way we carried ourselves, pretending to be happy when we weren't. Cassandra was much better at hiding than me, but then again I didn't even try. I accepted the way my life was, I accepted never being able to let go of Brianna. No matter how many fucking people told me I had to.

This past month felt like I was running in circles. Ever since meeting Cassandra my whole world was flipped on its side. I had seriously considered going my entire life single. I really did believe I could manage that, that no one would ever bring me as much joy and happiness as Brianna. Well I guess god has funny way of sending messages then. Something had to give, whether it was cutting off Cassandra forever, or just giving into her. I couldn't do that, I couldn't look at her without seeing the woman I loved so much for so long.

"You sure are a runner."

I rolled my eyes at the voice, I soon saw Riley's white Air Jordans step right in front of mine. I leaned back against the bench, staring right up at her. She shrugged her shoulders and took sat down right next to me. We sat there in silence for a few minutes, probably much longer than that.

"You like that girl, don't you?" She asked.

"I.....I don't know."

"What are you afraid of Quinn?" She asked. I could feel her eyes staring right into the side of my head.

I turned to her. "Nothing."

"Bullshit! You know I understand you not taking Adrian back but-"

"No you don't!" I seethed. "You know jack shit about what happened between her and I."

"Oh really?" She asked scooting closer to me. "I know that she loved you.....I know she was a fucking fool for it. I mean god forbid someone loves Quinn, he's too fucking good for that. No he'd rather wallow in his own self pity for the rest of his miserable life."

"You think it's easy! Knowing that every day that passes is another day I'll never see the love of my life again. Never laugh at her stupid jokes, or never hold her in my arms again. Do you have any idea what that feels like?" I shook my head at her. "No you don't, all you know is kissing on the first date with someone you'll probably break up with in the next 3 weeks."

Riley didn't respond right away, instead she pulled back a bit. She crossed her arms and stared off into the distance. She looked like she was thinking, like she was upset. Maybe I raised my voice too much? Maybe I should apologize?

"Listen I'm-"

"His name was Aiden." She said softly.

"Who?"

"The love of my life, his name was Aiden." She repeated. I saw her turn her head slightly, revealing the small tear droplets pooling down her cheeks.

"I....Riley I'm-"

"We used to go the beach every weekend, buy a few dime bags, and rent a cheap motel room." She continued lifting her eyes up to mine. "Nights like that would last an eternity, we'd fight all week and have the best make up sex on the beach. We were so happy, even if our worlds were falling apart around us, it didn't matter....we had eachother."

"What.....what happened?"

"He uh......he went out drinking one night, he begged me to come with him. But we had been fighting all day, I just......" She paused to wipe her tears as new ones filled their place. "I was so fucking angry at him. With all that was going on, all he cared up was getting wasted. So I stayed home and he left."

I swallowed the lump in my throat. "And?"

"Four hours went by and....I knew something was wrong. He wouldn't answer any of my calls or texts, even at our worst, he still answered my texts." She said before looking away from me. "I didn't sleep well that night, barely at all. I was so worried about him.....he always came home."

"Riley you don't have to-"

"Then at 6:30 in the goddamn morning, two state troopers knock on my door." She continued. "They said they found his body twenty feet from his truck, he had a ran a red light and smashed into another car. His body.....his body flew out the windshield."

There was a pause, a sudden shortness of breath. She tried to fight back tears, tried to keep her voice from choking up.

"They said he hadn't even been wearing his seat belt. He always wore....h-his s-seat belt." She wiped a tears with her sleeves before looking up at me.

"You want to know what the last thing I said to him was?" She asked staring a hole right through me. "Go on guess?"

"I....I don't kn-"

"I told him, I never want to see your fucking face again!" She shouted over me. The tears were streaming down her cheeks, with no signs of stopping. "Well lucky me right? I'll have to live with that."

I was in shock, I felt my mouth hang open in disbelief. I could never have imagine the type of pain others were going through. My own selfish grief has blinded me for so long. Now here I was staring a woman on the verge of balling her eyes out. So much pain hidden by such a bubbly personality, I could never have imagined.

"I.....I never told anyone that before." She said wiping her face with arm. "It's been so long."

I rubbed my forehead a bit. "Look Riley I'm....I'm sorry."

"The sad part Quinn, is that I do understand what it feels like." She said grabbing my hand. "The only difference between you and I, you got to say goodbye to your girlfriend."

She tossed my hand away before standing back up. I went to grab it but she only yanked it away.

"Riley I'm sorry ok I didn't-"

"You didn't what?" She asked tilting her head. "You didn't know? Grow up Quinn. Life isn't about grieving over the things you can't change. My Aiden is dead, your girlfriend is dead, and nothing can bring them back."

She walked over to the door of the theater, placing her hand on the handle, before looking back at me.

"So yeah, I might kiss on the first date. I might do a lot of other shit too. But you know what? I'm happy. Unlike you, I'm actually moving on with my life." She pulled the door open and took one step in. "Not wasting it away because I'm too afraid to kiss a pretty woman at the goddamn movies."

With that crude statement, she walked back inside, leaving me alone with nothing but my own thoughts again. It was dead silent now, even with the cars driving by, it was quiet. I stared at the glass doors of the movie theater, I could see right through them. I could see the people waiting in line for concessions, along with couples smiling and laughing as they walked out of theaters. Such a simple world, one that I thought I understood. Not anymore.

  I wish Brianna were still here, she would always make sense of things for me. What could I do now? Riley was right, my life has been on hold for the past year. I just started going back to school again, I tried making new friends, I tried hanging out with old ones. But in the end, I ended up right back where I started. A lonely boy afraid to get over his lost loved one. I'm nothing like Riley, her story was so much more worse than mine. Not there was any good to be had in either of them. But she's right, I said my goodbyes to Brianna, I loved her and she loved me, to the very end. Riley not only lost the love of her life, she lost him after cursing in his face, after telling him to leave her alone. It could've easily been her in the truck with him, maybe if she had gone she would've been the one driving. Maybe she knows that, maybe that's what kills her inside. With all that pain, she still manages to be so happy. Except it's not a facade, she's actually happy. Happier than I've been this whole year.

I cursed at myself before standing back up to my feet. I grabbed the handle of the door, flung it open and walked back in the theater. I practically ran back to the only theater showing Hello Dolly. Walking back up the ramp I wondered what Cassandra would think if she saw me. Would she smile? Would she frown? Or would she even acknowledge my existence? With all that I've done, the way I've acted, I wouldn't if I was her. But that's just it, I'm not like her in that way, she was the most kind I had ever met.

  When I turned the corner and looked up at the rows of seats, I saw the two brightest green eyes I had ever seen. Both of them sparkling in the light, both of them happy to see me. Shifting my gaze I met the most darkest green eyes I had ever come across. They were much less happy to see me and more relieved. They were also sparkling, but not because of their excited, because of the tears that were still left over in them. Beneath those eyes however told the story, a smile, bright and white, wide as can be. A smile directed at me, not just from those eyes, but from the other four as well. All of them staring right at me, all of them smiling. What more could I have done? Other than smile back.

  The movie's credits rolled down the screen only a few minutes later. I found myself outside the theater alone with TJ, both of us waiting for the girls to use the restroom. The sky was dark now, we had spent way too much time in the theater. I still had some things I planned on doing tonight, I guess they could wait.

"So uh....how long have you known Riley for?" TJ asked leaning against a bench.

"About as long as you have."

"Really?" He asked raising his eyebrows.

I sighed. "Yes, really."

"What about Adrian?" He asked.

"Much much longer." I stared up at the night sky. "Since I was about 15."

"Whew! That's a long time." He said pacing back and forth. "You two used to date right?"

"Yeah when we were both in highschool."

"Well Adrian's good looking, but that girl you got now......woo!" He said.

I shook my head. "Her and I aren't-"

"Cut the shit man." He said chuckling a bit. "You can say that as many times as you want, but you and her both know, there's more there than just friendship."

I crossed my arms and looked back at him. "I don't know man, there's a lot you don't know about."

"I may not know you, but I know this, that girl you're with likes you. It's so damn obvious I don't even think she's trying to hide it." He said.

"She's just comfortable around me I guess." I shrugged.

"That's one word for it." He chuckled again. "But the funny part....is that you like her too, and you're just as bad at hiding it."

"Look TJ you don't underst-"

"I hope you two haven't forgotten about us!"

I looked over my shoulder to see both Riley and Cassandra heading towards us. I waved off the argument and just forced a smile for both of them.

"Fuck its cold out here." Riley said hugging herself.

"Here I got you babe." TJ said taking off his hoodie and handing to her.

"Babe?" She asked while pulling his hoodie over her head.

"It just sort of came out." He said smiling at her. "Sorry?"

"Don't be." She said before planting a kiss on his cheek. "It's just been a while since anyone's called me that."

I looked over at Cassandra clutching the hem of my hoodie. "Are you cold?"

"Oh no no I'm fine." She said waving it off. "I have a pretty high tolerance for the cold."

I shook my head and pulled my hoodie off anyway. "No come on take it."

"Quinn, honestly I'm good." She said tilting her head.

I held it out and smiled. "I'm not taking no for an answer Cassie."

"Fine." She said rolling her eyes. "But I'm keeping it."

I chuckled as she snatched it out of my hand. "Oh really?"

"Ofcourse dummy." She said pulling the large hoodie over her slender frame. "It looks better on me anyway."

I gazed at her from top to bottom. "Can't argue with you there."

"Well I don't know about you guys but I'm too tired to walk back to the car." Riley said leaning against TJ. "Darling be a gentleman and carry me."

"What do you me-OKAY!" He yelped as Riley jumped on to his back.

"Onward!" She shouted pointing straight ahead.

"I'm not a horse you know." He said laughing under his breath. However, he didn't show any sign of protest, he just started walking.

"I know." She said rubbing his cheek. "You're far cuter than any horse I've ever seen."

Hearing them both laugh over eachother reminded of that "new couple" mentality. No matter how much a couple can try, they can never get that same spark. There's just nothing like falling in love for the first time. While walking I noticed Cassandra staring at them with a specific look on her face. It was almost as if she was jealous, as if she wanted what they had. Who wouldn't? Who wouldn't want happiness like that? Watching TJ carry Riley on his back as he ran around the giant sidewalk, it was pure. Moments like that were what people lived for, the feeling of just being happy with someone you loved. Cassandra clearly wanted that, I couldn't give her love, but I could give her a moment.

I leaned against her, placing my arm around her. "You want one too don't you?"

"Want what?" She glanced at me then back at them. "A boyfriend?"

I blushed a bit. "Well that too but.....I mean't a piggyback ride."

"You wanna give me a piggyback ride Quinn?" She asked squinting her eyes at me.

"Only if you want one." I smiled.

She didn't say another word, instead she simply hopped up and threw her arms around me. My hands quickly found her thighs and held her snug against my waist. Her head rested against my shoulder, even without looking out her, I could feel her smiling. I was smiling too, smiling bigger than I have in a long time. I walked a bit quicker as to catch up with TJ and Riley. Both of them immediately turning their heads to point at us.

"Well look at you two!" Riley said.

"What can I say?" I shrugged. "She shouldn't have to walk either."

"Hey, bet we can beat you two in a race." TJ dared with a smug grin.

I shook my head. "Well that's not exactly fair."

"How?" TJ asked.

"Because Riley weighs like 2 pounds."

"Are you calling me skinny?" Riley gasped.

"Wait!" Cassandra gasped. "Are you calling me heavy?"

I rolled my eyes while looking over my shoulder. "Oh my god no! I'm just saying you've got a lot to hold on to is all.

"If that's your way of saying she has a big ass, you're in trouble buddy." Riley giggled.

"Big trouble!" TJ laughed.

"I'll take the compliment." Cassandra whispered into my ear. "Besides, this big ass is worth carrying."

I chuckled under my breath. "That it is." I nodded. "That. It. Is."

The walk back to the car wasn't far, took us only five minutes. Cassandra and I walked here from our dorms, the car belonged to TJ. It just seemed like the appropriate thing to do, considering it was on the way to our dormitories. It also gave me an excuse not to carry Cassandra all the back to her dorm. Once we got to TJ's car I let her down back on to her feet slowly. Riley practically jumped off of TJ's back and walked over to Cassandra and I.

"Well that was a good time, wasn't it?" She asked us both.

"Definitely not how I planned on spending tonight......" Cassandra trailed off looking up at me.

"But yeah, it was a good time." I finished.

"Could I borrow you for a second Quinn." Riley asked holding her hand out.

I nodded and took her hand. "Yeah sure."

I followed her as she led me just a few feet away from the car. I kept my eyes on Cassandra who seemed to start up a conversation with TJ. My focus quickly shifted back to Riley when I felt her squeeze my hand.

"Listen Quinn, about earlier.....look I'm really sorry for venting like that." She said keeping her eyes away from mine. "In all honesty, I had no business getting upset with you. It's your life Quinn and you deserve to live it how you want to."

"You're right."

"So if we could just forget-"

"I am afraid!"

"I....wait, what did you just say?" She asked looking up at me.

I shut my eyes and nodded. "I said, I'm afraid. Afraid of being with someone new, afraid that moving on just means betraying the woman I've loved for so long. I'm afraid of being happy without her."

"Quinn, it's not betrayal. You're girlfriend would've wanted you to be happy." She said.

I opened my eyes and shook my head. "I know but........it's so hard Riley. How do you do it? How do you just.....move on?"

"I don't know Quinn." She said looking down at our hands. "But it's been a long time, a very long time. You can't stay upset forever." Her eyes glanced over at Cassandra. "Not when a new life is just standing there waiting for you." 

I followed her gaze and saw Cassandra laughing with TJ. "Why does she have to look so cute? At everything she does?"

"She sure is a keeper Quinn, I'm telling you." Riley said smiling at me. "A girl like that, is something else."

I grinned just thinking about her. "Yeah she is, is she?"

"I mean look at her ass. Like how the fuck does she get it so round and plump like that?" Riley asked giggling through her words.

I chuckled with her. "I have no fucking idea."

"I mean I'm more of tits over ass kind of girl myself, but even then....." Riley said before closing her eyes and shaking her head. "God! I mean I don't usually eat ass but hers-"

"Riley!" I gasped.

"What?!" She asked shrugging. "I still swing both ways you know."

I shook my head. "Not the time."

"Speaking of time, what time is it?" She asked looking up at the night sky.

I pulled out my phone and checked. "It's about nine."

"Fuck!" She cursed running a hand through her long brown hair. "Adrian's gonna be pissed. I totally stood her up for our movie tonight."

"Wait you were gonna watch another movie after going to the movies?"

"Truth is we probably weren't gonna make it halfway through that movie." She said biting her lip to mask her grin.

I sucked my teeth. "Gross."

  We both laughed for a bit before catching our breaths. Our eyes were still on Cassandra and TJ, both oblivious to us staring at them. Riley was right about another thing, Cassandra was a special girl. And I would be the biggest fucking idiot to let her go.

"Do me a favor Quinn, take a chance at life." Riley said letting go of my hand. "Before it leaves you behind."

"I was wrong about you, you know?"

"About what?" She asked.

"You know a lot more than I thought you did."

She held in a giggle as to not ruin the moment. But she understood what I meant, I was wrong for underestimating her. For thinking she was just a wild bubbly girl with no sense of any real grasps on life. Turns out there was a whole lot more going on inside that head of hers. Some I definitely didn't want to know about, but some I did. I felt her wrap arms around me before squeezing me tight in her arms. I hugged her back before letting her go.

"Take care Quinn." She said before snapping her fingers. "Let's do this again sometime, just the two of us."

"Sure you're not gonna try take a swing at me?"

"Oh I'm way out of your batter's box pretty boy." She said before waving goodbye.

I watched her walk over to Cassandra and give her a hug goodbye as well. TJ did the same before him and Riley got in his car and drove away. For the second time again tonight, it was just Cassandra and I. I took a few steps forward and met her in the middle of the sidewalk.

"So, where do we go from here Quinn?" She asked putting her hands in the pocket of her hoodie.

I tugged on one of the strings attached to it. "Well first I'm gonna have to find a way to get my hoodie back from you."
 
"Keep trying, you're never getting this back from me." She said leaning against me.

I smiled and rolled my eyes. "Can I ask you a question?"

"Sure." She said putting an arm around me.

"Whatever happened to that picture of me you were drawing."

"Oh that.....umm....it's done." She said trying to play it cool. She sucked at playing it cool, she always got shy and reclusive about her artwork.

I nodded. "Really? Well when can I see it?"

"Oh umm....I mean it's not done done. You know there's still shading that needs to be done and your eyes need some work still, surprisingly your eyes are very hard to get right, I mean they're gorgeous-but not like that you know like in a-"

I gripped her shoulders. "Cassie."

"Yes." She said catching her breath.

"You don't have to show it to me tonight."

"Oh thank god." She sighed before hugging me. "I got so fucking nervous there for a second."

"Look you can take as long as you want." I glanced down at her. "But I do plan on buying a frame for it."

"What?" She looked up at me. "Why?"

"So I can look at everyday when I wake up."

"But it's just a....picture of you." She said.

"Yeah, but it's a picture of me drawn by you."

"You know your the first guy to ever give a shit about my artwork, you know that?" She asked chewing on her lips a bit.

"Well I can be pretty unordinary."

"That's the word." She said snapping her fingers.

"What word?"

"The word that best describes you." She said laying her head against my chest. "Unordinary."

I put my arms around her and looked up at the sky. The stars were out now, no longer hidden by the clouds. As if it was a sign that the world was counting on me and my new life. The life had right in my arms, the chance I had to take. I guess that's what I was most afraid of. If I took that chance, would I just end up right where I started? Or could it be the beginning of a new chapter? One with a happier ending? Maybe. Maybe I could take that chance. Riley was right after all, life moves on without me, might as well make the most of it. If only it was as easy to do it as it was to think about it.