Chapter Forty One

Everyone gasped with Shaurya's outburst, their eyes fixed on the spoiled two-tier cake on the floor in shock before they looked at a raging Shaurya.

"Can we all stop pretending that everything is normal?!" Shaurya yelled in frustration, "Because it is not!"

"Kya aap kush hai?" Shaurya pointed at the family members, "Nahi, kya mein kush hoon yehan pe? Nahi. Jitne bhi kush hone ka try karun, I feel suffocated! I'm tired of pretending!"

Anokhi rushed to Shaurya's side and grabbed his hand trying to calm him down but he wasn't in the mood to let go today. He roughly wriggled his hand out of her grip before looking down at her,

"Anokhi, not today!" Shaurya said sternly, tears unconsciously spilling out of his eyes, "Aaj jo kuch bhi andher hai, I want to say, I want to ask! Aaj koi mujhe rukhega nahi!"

Astha's face lost its colours and Devi's state was no different. In the name of redeeming herself for what she did to Astha, she shouldn't have pushed Shaurya. But then she had no clue that Shaurya knows the truth and so, she stepped forward to calm Shaurya down.

"Shaurya beta, kya bath hai? Kya hua tum ko? Tum aese kyun bol rahe ho" Devi said holding Shaurya's hand but she frowned and stiffened when he roughly wriggled himself from her hold.

"Aap!" Shaurya glared at Devi, pointing his finger at her, "Aap mujhe touch math kijiyeh!"

"Shaurya tu-" Alok started but Shaurya cut him in middle and spoke with his eyes fixed on Devi.

"Aap mere paas math aayiyeh! Mujhse bath karke aap mujhpe ek aur yehsaan math kijiyeh! Warna mera pura zindagi nikal jaayega aap ka yehsaan chukhe chukhe!" Shaurya said in a bitter tone with a bitter smile taking everyone aback.

"Shaurya" Devi's eyes blurred with tears, "Yeh tu kya...kya keh raha hai? Yeh...yehsaan?"

"Aap itni shock kyun ho rahi ho, Badi maa? Aakir aap wahi kiya na mujhpe, ek bin maa ke bacha par yehsaan" Shaurya said bitterly as he looked at Devi, tears spilling out of his eyes.

"Shaurya!" Devi was taken aback while Tej remained mum the whole time.

"Haan, Badi maa. Sahi keh raha hoon na mein ne. Mera zindagi toh aap ke yehsaan par chaltha haina. Mei-"

"Shaurya, tum...tum mere pyaar ko yehsaan keh rahe ho?" Devi looked at Shaurya with tearful eyes.

"Aap ka pyaar?" Shaurya chuckled, "Maan tha hoon ki aap mujhe pyaar zaroor kiya par aap ko andhaza bhi hai ki us pyaar ke liye mujhe kya kya chukane pade?"

"Shaurya, tum he kya ho gaya hai? Bhabhi se is tarah kyun bath kar rahe ho! Maa hai ter-" Alok said only to get cut in middle.

"Voh mera koi maa nahi hai, chachu!" Shaurya yelled and Devi felt her heart sank with his words, "Voh joh waha kadi hai na, Ms. Astha Kashyap, voh bhi mera Maa nahi hai. Mein 26 years ke pehle bhi bin maa ka bacha tha aur aaj bhi wahi hoon!"

Astha casted her head down as tears stinged her eyes.

"Shaurya beta, tum is tarah se bath kyun kar rahe ho. Tum he patha haina ki tera badi maa tujhse bahat pyaar karthi hai. Mein tu-" Devi said and was about to place her hand on Shaurya's shoulder.

"Oh please! Don't comfort me with your lies, Badi maa! Mujhe sach patha hai!" Shaurya said stepping back before Devi could place her hand on him.

"Samaj nahi aa raha ki kis sach ke bare mein bath kar raha hoon?" Shaurya asked with a mocking smile as tears crashed down his cheeks which he didn't bother to wipe, "Aap ka sach, Badi maa! Iss parivaar ka sach! Mera zindagi ka sach!"

Shaan, Astha and Anokhi who knew the truth kept mum, their eyes casted down while rest were puzzled, shocked and confused with Shaurya's behaviour.

"Yeh tu kya keh raha hai, Shaurya?" Devi asked in a defeated tone.

"Aap ne kya kaha tha? Astha Kasyap mujhe chod kar gayi thi?" Shaurya asked straight to the point and Devi's breath hitched, "Kitna bada joot! She never left me! You made her to! You people valued your tradition so much that you failed to value women folk of Sabharwal house! She wanted to continue her profession and you made her abandoned her marriage, her family...her son?!"

Shaurya let it out of him,

"What wrong did a four-year-old do that you separated me from her? You made me parentless, taaki aap aapke mamtha mujhe dika sake, isliyeh? Aap ke mamtha jathane ke liye aap ne mere zindagi ke sath kela hai! Mere zindagi ko, mere ko ek joot bana ke rakh diya! Koun hai, Shaurya? Devi Sabharwal ka yehsaan! Koun hai, Shaurya?! Kya tha uske zindagi mein sivai joot ke! Yeh kaisa pyaar hai if not selfishness!"

Devi casted her eyes down and cried as the weight of the situation finally dawned her but Shaurya didn't stop.
"You separated me from my mother, you let my father become alcoholic, you let me suffer and then came to my aid. You said you cared for me, you loved me and then I trusted you blindly! I loved you blindly! You become the centre of my universe but you...you raised me with lies! You manipulated me! You made my whole existence nothing but lie!"

Astha saw Devi. Knowing her health state, she wiped her tears and walked over to Devi before facing Shaurya.

"Shaurya, plea-"

"Aap! Aayiyeh Ms. Kashyap, aayiyeh. Don't even get me started on what you did!" Shaurya chucked as he clapped his hands before glaring at her,

"Haan, mein ne aap ke letters padi thi! Toh? Should it magically make me okay with what you did? YOU ABANDONED ME MS. KASHYAP! For 25 years I kept living with the pain, with the scar you gave me! I kept asking what I did wrong; where I went wrong! There was a time I longed for you, prayed, wished and hoped that you would come back to take me with you! Couldn't you have fought for me? Couldn't you have taken me along?"

Shaurya flared in anger,

"This family chose its tradition over you! You chose your parents over me! But what about me? Mere bare mein kya socha? Aish ke zindagi nahi chatha tha! Apne maa chatha tha mein! Chatha tha! Be it roadside or hut, I would have lived anywhere if it's with you! Yeh kyun nahi socha aap ne! 25 years mudke nahi dekha aap ne, aaj kyun? You secretly visiting me on my sports day, annual day wagera wagera doesn't matters! You knew I hated you! You knew I'm suffering yet you stayed away and let someone else do what you were supposed to do; raise me! You fought for women's rights! You fought for your students! You have always stood by right. Then, why didn't you fight for me?!"

Shaurya yelled in frustration as he moved back with tears, his eyes bloodshot. He stumbled when his legs hit the couch at back.

"Shaurya be-" Alok started but Shaurya raised his hands stopping anyone from coming near him.

"Tum logon ko patha bhi hai ki mein ne apne zindagi kaise jiyithi ithne saal?! Shaurya haske reh tha hai, sab ka kayaal raktha hai, hasaatha hai, perfect beta hai. Par voh asli Shaurya nahi thai!" Shaurya yelled in frustration as he stared at everyone,

"Asli Shaurya voh tha who waits for his parents every single night and cries to sleep as he gets disappointed every single time! Asli Shaurya voh tha who have to be the best version of himself so that he can please his Bade papa and Badi Maa every single time, so that his family can be proud of him, so that he won't be tagged as Shaan's naalayak beta! Asli Shaurya voh tha who despite suffering from loneliness and anger, had to pretend happy every single day! Asli Shaurya voh tha who instead of listening to bed time stories spent cleaning the mess his alcoholic father created!"

Shaurya wiped his tears,

"This family raised me for 25 years and pretending to be happy, to be perfect was my way of giving back to you. Pretend, that's what I have did my whole life so far! Par mujse aur nahi hota! I'm tired of pretending, to be happy, to be someone I'm not!"

Anokhi wiped her tears and walked near Shaurya but he took a step back making her pause.

"Yeh" Shaurya pointed Anokhi as he spoke, "Anokhi, agar yeh nahi hoti toh shayad...shayad...Anokhi sirf meri biwi nahi hai! She's by my side, supporting me, caring me, loving me like a mother should! Ek parivaar ka kami isne mujhe mehsoos karne hi nahi diya! She's, my pillar of strength! She's my ray of hope in life! She's my life but you all have broke me so much that I couldn't even voice out what I feel for her. You all made me feel undeserving of her pure love! I couldn't trust the world again without fear. I couldn't look at people the same as before!"

Shaurya wiped his teas with the back of his hand before taking a huge breath and fixed his eyes on Devi and Astha who stood side by side and crying.

"Aur aap dhono, you both played with my life! Koun Shaurya ko zyadha pyaar kartha hai, yeh nahi. Koun Shaurya ko zyadha dardh diya, yeh khela hai aap dhono ne!" Shaurya accused them as he pointed his fingers at them, "Astha ma'am, aap ne ek din bhi nahi socha ki kya hoga agar aap ka beta bada ho kar aap par ungli utake sawal karega ki kyun...kyun usse aap chod ke gayi thi!" Shaurya gritted his teeth and turned his gaze towards Devi, "Aur Badi maa, aap, aap toh meri bhagwaan thi! Meri duniya thi! Ek din bhi nahi socha ki kya hoga jab Shaurya ko yeh patha chalega ki jo kuch bhi uske zindagi mein pareesani, problem hai, uske kaaran aap hai!"

"Shaurya, mera baath suno. Tum na-" Shaan started but Shaurya cut him in middle.

"No, dad. I have made peace with you. So, don't come in between!" Shaurya said harshly before fixing his gaze on the two women, "Ithne saal aap dhono ne mere zindagi ke saath khela aur ab aap dhono ko toh dekho! Dosti ho gayi, pyaar dekha rahe ho! Has rahe ho! Move on kar chuke ho! What about me! Mein ab bhi wahi 4 saal Shaurya jaise hi pad gaya! Clueless! Helpless! Suffocation! Mera kya? Aap logon ne tab bhi nahi socha, na aaj!"

The mothers cried while Shaurya took deep breath and looked away, wiping his tears. Anokhi took a sharp intake of breath before walking towards Shaurya and grabbed his hand in hers making her look up. One look at her and his strong demeaner broke and he hugged her as his body shook with his tears.

"Anokhi, mujhe yehan se jana hai" Shaurya mumbled between his tears as he cried while Anokhi caressed his back and cried, letting him cry.

When Shaurya pulled back, he wiped his tears before grabbing Anokhi's hand and turned to look at the family,

"Ithne yaadhgar birthday ke liye thank you" Shaurya said with a forced smile as he bit back his tears, "Mujhe aur Anokhi ko ab chalna chahiyeh"

Shaurya pulled Anokhi along with him and was about to walk out when Tej finally broke his silence,

"Shaurya rukho!"

Shaurya paused on his tracks on hearing Tej, his grip on Anokhi tightened.

"Tum he patha hai ki jo kuch bhi Devi ne kiya, us mein mera galti hai phir bhi tum ne mujhe ek sabdh bhi nahi kaha?" Tej asked in a broken voice as his eyes blurred with tears, "Shayadh aap logon ko patha nahi par Devi ne mujhe Astha ko wapas lane ke liye kaha tha. Mein iss ghar ki bade ko ke ek varis tak nahi de paya, yeh mujhe undher hi undher maar raha tha! Jab Devi ne Astha ko wapas lane ke liye kaha, mein ne hi mana kiya tha. Mein ne hi Shaurya ko goudh mein lene ke liye kaha, us se paalne ko, apna jaisa pyaar karne ko... yeh jo kuch tera zindagi mein galat tha, Shaurya, yeh mere waje se tha, na tera Maa, na tera Badi maa, mein hoon. Dandh mujhe milna chahiyeh, in dhono ko nahi. In logon ke pyaar ko joot bol ke inhe dandh math dho Shaurya"

A pregnant silence dominated the room as everyone save for Shaurya looked at Tej's tearful pleading eyes. Shaurya's frame shook as he stifled a cry before he turned around and looked at Bade papa,

"Mujhe patha tha" Shaurya confirmed what Tej said before adding, "Har bache ka super hero toh unka dad hota hai. Mein toh aap ko bhagwaan maan ke beita tha. Badi maa diya hua dardh toh mein ne seh liya par aap ka diya hua dardh toh mujhe kab ka marchuka hai, Bade papa. Ithni din aap se bath ki, hassa sirf yeh soch ke ki aap ek fellow human hai, mere Bade papa nahi kyun ki mere liye toh voh kab ka mar chuke hai"

Shaurya gave a painful smile as he watched Tej cry before he grabbed Anokhi's hand and walked out of Sabharwal House.

~ * ~

Hey guys, hope you all are doing good. I penned this down with whatever that came to my mind. I wanted it to be tad bit realistic along with drama. Hope I didn't disappoint and that you enjoyed reading.

I'll be only focusing on Shakhi, rest characters conversation would be only in narration like how Astha and Shaan got married, how Tej, Devi apologized to family members etc. Sorry about that.

Thank you for your response on previous chapter.

Nan ~