prologue. ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ a lamb awaiting slaughter

The day started as it ended— with a scream. Her legs kicked furiously at the blanket covering her lower body, her upper half shooting up almost immediately. Her doe-like eyes were wide in fright, chest heaving up and down erratically as her hands fisted her white sheets to ground herself to something. She could faintly hear a light shuffling of feet and a sleepy voice saying something in the background, but her pounding heart was much louder in her ears. Breathe in, one, two, three, four ... Out.

Astoria's vision blurred before she comprehended the hand that was waving closely in her line of sight, forcing her to jerk her head back in surprise. She stared at her reflection, realizing a second later that she wasn't looking at a mirror, but instead at her twin sister. Aurelia's expression was too worried to be her own face.

"What's wrong?" Aurelia tried to whisper, but it was futile. Her scream had to have woken up the entire household, possibly even the entire neighborhood as well. Maybe her grandmother woke up from across town, somehow always knowing when something was wrong. Her sister's hand reached over to grasp at Astoria's hand, but she flinched back at the sudden touch. Aurelia's hands were freezing cold, but they were always like that; so were Astoria's.

Their door was pushed open in a hurry, their necks practically snapping to see who it was. Her father stood in the doorway, a worried expression on his face with his hand still on the doorknob and the other on the door frame to hold him up. The expression wore down her father's face, making him seem older than he was. She swallowed roughly from nervousness, feeling how dry her mouth and lips were.

"What happened?" His voice was gruff from just being awoken, and guilt whirled around in her stomach, making her feel sick. She didn't say anything, laying back down in bed and holding a hand to her stomach, hoping it would settle down. "Astoria, Aurelia— which one of you screamed? It's nearly two in the morning, neither of you should be up!"

Neither girls spoke, their eyes meeting in a silent conversation before Astoria turned to their father, "It was me, I'm sorry, daddy," her voice was quiet as she spoke, hanging her head low in feigned disappointment. "I was coming back from the bathroom and I thought I saw a spider so I accidentally screamed and woke Astoria up to kill it but by then, it was already gone."

Their father didn't respond, eyes flickering between the two girls to see if anything on their faces would give away the lie. The twins had practiced their poker faces long ago, and were practically masters at it by now. Isaiah sighed heavily, nodding at once, "Alright, well, go back to bed. We're going to meet Mimi at Rowdy's tomorrow morning and I'm not dealing with any brattiness or meltdowns just 'cause you gotta wake up early on a Saturday."

"Night," the girls murmured in unison, watching their father leave, shutting the door behind him closed. They listened for his footsteps to walk further away before Aurelia turned back to Astoria. Astoria's eyes darted away as soon as they made eye contact, chewing on the skin of her lip nervously, threatening to rip it off.

"What happened?" Aurelia repeated in a gentle whisper, brows furrowing, "It sounded like you were hurt." A frown was placed on her lips, exactly the same as there was one on Astoria's, as well.

"Just a scary dream," she exhaled, closing her eyes once again. "I'll be fine. Please go back to bed." One, two, three, four. Again. One, two, three, four.

Aurelia didn't respond, but Astoria knew she was still there from her weight dipping in her mattress. Finally, she sighed, "OK." She still didn't move, though, and Astoria could tell she was debating on something. "Can I sleep next to you?"

They both knew she wasn't asking for herself.

Astoria shifted closer to the wall, opening the blanket for her sister wordlessly. Their shoulders and arms were touching, and if it were anyone else, Astoria would move away so they were no longer touching. But this was her sister— her twin, they shared the same womb for nine months and were somehow always touching. No one's touch brought comfort to Astoria more than Aurelia.

Astoria's body loosened, letting her relax into her mattress as her sister settled down beside her. They didn't say anything, but they didn't need to. Just knowing the other was there was enough.

Aurelia fell asleep before Astoria did. That's how it usually was, Astoria took longer to fall asleep than her sister did. With the soft snoring of her sister beside her, she stared up at the bottom of Aurelia's bed.

She swallowed as a voice that wasn't her own spoke up, but she wasn't surprised. The voice had always been there with her.

You poor thing, the voice cooed almost mockingly. Astoria's hand formed into a tight fist, knuckles turning pale. Sweet mourning lamb, there's nothing you can do.

Only five hours later, Astoria was wide awake and sitting on the bus stop's bench, her sister in the seat next to her. She leaned back in her spot, resting her back against the bench and her arm raising to lay across the armrest in between the two. The sun beamed down in her eyes, making her squint and raise her unoccupied hand to shield her eyes from the sun. The sun was harsh today, not a hint of cloudy in today's forecast, and it certainly was not kind to the citizens of Newark, New Jersey regarding the heat.

Her father touched her shoulder lightly, getting her attention easily, "Stop moving so much." She followed his line of sight and found that her knee was subconsciously jumping up and down in one spot. His hand landed on her knee, forcing her shoe to touch the concrete and remain there. She exhaled before nodding in agreement, hearing her surroundings get louder as more people joined the bus stop area. A man sat right next to her, making her frown and scoot as close as she could to Aurelia, despite the arm rest in between them. She heard a long whistle from behind her, but didn't turn around. She was smart enough not to give them any attention.

Looking up, Astoria peered both ways for any sight of a city bus coming their way, but could only find yellow taxi cars and regular cars. She thought they were lucky people to be able to afford a car and apartment in New Jersey. "Maybe we should have taken the subway," she said offhandedly to her sister, speaking a bit louder than normal so Aurelia could hear her over the busy traffic and cars honking. Her sister nodded in agreement as they watched the cars drive past them.

"Could do with some water or lemonade right now, huh?" The man next to her hummed, and she was reminded that all three of them were squished on the bench. Her lips twisted around, giving the man a single glance but he wasn't looking at her. She looked around to see if he was talking to someone else, but neither her father or sister were paying attention. Her father was typing furiously on his Blackberry work phone, brows scrunched in frustration. When she turned to her sister, she was playing with her hair, twisting the strands of them into mini braids across her head. She was humming to a song in her head, but Astoria could barely tell what song due to the busy noises around them. A power drill whirled loudly several feet to the left of her, construction workers working on a new building. She was sure it'd be another apartment complex, or perhaps another Starbucks.

"Do you like lemonade?" The man continued to talk when she didn't respond, finally turning to look at her. A gasp involuntarily left her mouth in surprise as she could finally see his face. She didn't mean to, but the man had severe third degree burns on the left side of his face, a wicked gleam in his unaffected right eye. His left eye was more gray than a normal eye color, like blue or brown. "I think water is too plain, especially when it's not cold."

Astoria fumbled for a response, trying to direct her eyes to something else and blinked rapidly, "Lemonade's OK. I like my water cold, too."

The man grinned at her response, a wide smile stretching across his face and making the burns stretch. She tried not to flinch. "Seems like we have a lot in common, then." She wondered how he came to that conclusion when he only knew two things about her.

Astoria didn't know what to respond with, but luckily, she didn't have to as her father finally glanced up from his phone and became aware of the strange man next to his daughters. His hand landed on her shoulder again, this time capturing both of their attentions. "Come stand next to me."

She didn't argue despite wanting to stay seated, standing up and her sister finally looked up from her braids as well, watching her twin stand. She followed suit, leaving her sister in the middle of her father and her. Two people quickly took their seats, a mother lightly moving the stroller in her hand back and forth to calm her fussy baby and another man, talking loudly on the phone with spit escaping his mouth with each word.

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw her father take a double look at the strange man that had been talking to her, eyes widening in shock. The man didn't react, simply grinning and winking at Astoria before turning back around and dipping his hat to cover the top half of his face, head lowering to his chest.

"Freak," her father murmured harshly, not meant for anyone to hear, and Astoria briefly wondered why she could hear him over the city noises around them yet her sister nor anyone else around them could. The strange man's head turned slightly, as if he heard the comment, but didn't make a move to confront her father. She let out a breath of relief. She hated how confrontational her father was and how much he got into arguments with practically everyone.

"Oh, you're kidding," her father complained loudly a moment later when the bus finally showed up, but instead of being right in front of them, the car was across the road at the opposite bus stop. "They just need to pick a bus stop and stop switching every other day which one to pick up at." Others murmured in agreement, huffing being heard as the street light turned red and the crosswalk person turned white. "Let's go, girls. Before the damn bus decides to leave."

Astoria wanted to grab her sister and father's hands to cross the road but her father was back to typing on his phone as quickly as he could and her sister was already too far away for her to grab as others hurriedly passed them to cross the road. Aurelia went to step into the road but froze right before, allowing an old man with a cane go before her, smiling sweetly up at the man.

Astoria's eyes met with an old lady's across the road, steely gray meeting warm brown. A car passed by and they momentarily broke eye contact, but their eyes met once again after as if it were never broken. A steady, wrinkly hand rose with a red thread in between her fingers. In her other hand, there were a pair of scissors.

She snipped the thread in half just as Aurelia stepped onto the road.

A raw, bloodcurdling scream left Astoria's lips as a black car raced past, forcing Aurelia's tiny body to fly back several feet into the road.

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ WORD. 2011
‎ ‎ ‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ MORE.

☠︎︎ and here is the prologue! this is basically when the twins are around 7 years old, and right when astoria loses aurelia.

☠︎︎ they also currently live in newark, new jersey at this time if it isn't obvious. newark is where they were born and grew up. astoria doesn't get to new york until around the age 10–11, when she goes to greenshaw, which is located in albany, new york. closer to long island than it is to newark, i'm pretty sure.

☠︎ pretty much just before everything goes to shit for astoria. rip astoria (and aurelia)

☠︎︎ i really hope my writing for this chapter is well written and explained well. please make sure to vote for this chapter if you liked it and i beg of you to please comment, don't be a silent reader. i appreciate each and every single comment i get and it honestly makes me so happy that people are reading my work.