Chapter twenty- one
If there was one thing my father taught me it was to question everything. I didn't trust Raiden for a second. I didn't believe he was taking me into the city out of the kindness of his heart. There had to be a different reason for him bringing me here and it wasn't to simply get out of the castle. I kept the dagger with me, tucking it into my waistline. I wore all black, like Raiden. I figured there had to be a reason for his get up.
"How do you know about these?" I asked as he ushered me through a secret corridor that led to a secret exit.
His grin was cocky. "It Is my castle, love."
I let out a slow, calm breath. "Don't call me that."
"You're no fun."
"I am fun just not around you." We walked through hidden corridors aimlessly for what felt like a mile until we reached a door.
"I very much doubt that." Raiden opened the door and gestured for me to go first. I slid past him, our chest grazing as I went through the threshold. I felt my heart lurch into my throat and shivers crawl down my spine. Shivers of fear, of course.
I scowled at him once I had passed through. "You did that on purpose."
He hid his smirk behind his hood. "Like I said, you're no fun."
"I am too!" I felt like hitting myself in the face. I was letting him get to me and I sounded childish while doing it.
"Prove it." He extended his hand to the city in front of us. I felt the air leave my lungs. It was ... it was beautiful. I admired the city from my balcony but it didn't compare to seeing it first hand. The streets were made of ... obsidian? No that couldn't be right or possible. Maybe some types of onyx. I wasn't sure but I did know it was some kind of black stone. It was enchanting. It looked like there were sparkes of gold running through the stone. The alley ways were filled with lanterns, the glow reflecting onto the black streets made it look surreal.
The alleys were filled with wood arches with engravings on them, there were swirls of smokes, moons, and fire etched into the wood. People crowded everywhere, they were dressed eloquently, wearing masquerade ball gowns and decorative masks, this must be the parade.
"We are severely underdressed."
With the new found light I could see Raiden's face perfectly. The glow of the lamps illuminated against his golden brown skin making him look like a god, although I would never tell him that. I would never let him know how beautiful I found him.
His dark eyes seemed somehow brighter and I realized it was because he was wearing black eyeliner beneath them, it made him stand out more than he already did. I presumed that's why he wore it, I could tell he loved attention. And that he valued his looks, he was always dressed luxuriously, his curly white hair was always styled, and the way he walked just oozes confidence.
I narrowed my gaze. Underneath his left eye there was a drawn on black star. "What's with the star?"
"It's tradition, everyone wears a star beneath their left eye for the festival." He was right, as I looked out at the crowd of people all of them had stars painted or drawn on their faces.
I felt even more severely out of place.
"Everyone but me."
Raiden pulled out charcoal from his front pocket, it was shaped like a pencil and was as black as his eyes. "I figured you might tell yourself you hate being out of place."
"What's that's supposed to mean? I do hate being out of place."
Amusement sparkled in his eyes. Everything was a game to him. "Whatever helps you sleep, love."
I snatched the charcoal and went to one of the storefront windows so I could see my reflection. I drew a black star under my eye, in the same place Raiden's was. I stared at myself probably longer than I should have. I looked different. My eyes were different. They were the same color, the same grayish blue but they seemed as if they aged, as if they've been tired out. My hair was the same dark blonde but it didn't have its usual wild frizz to it. I seemed weaker. Maybe being kidnapped does that to a girl.
"Do you enjoy looking at yourself?" Raiden said from behind me. I whirled towards him, a glare already on my face. He held up his hands defensively but it was an act of sarcasm. "Nothing to be ashamed of, I do so too. Although I am much prettier to look at."
I smiled, bitterly. "Are you sure about that?"
Raiden chose to ignore me, grabbing my hand and dragging me into the crowd. I almost ripped my hand from his but I realized I had no idea where we were going. Paper lanterns, with a fire design on them, strung across one of the courtyards. There were vendors everywhere along with music dancing.
I peered out at all of them, the Greer, they were living, they were enjoying life, they were not sad or filled with anguish, they were happy. Their energy was so strong I could almost feel their joy.
The atmosphere around me made a smile blossom on my face even though I hadn't meant it to. It was the first real smile I've had in a very long time. I turned to find Raiden staring at me. "What?" I snapped.
"Nothing. Here." He held out a mask to me, it was black with golden swirls through it. I took it from him and put it on. I noticed he had one too, He definitely didn't have these before. I looked around and realized we had passed a vendor who was selling masks. He definitely hadn't stopped to buy one.
I turned back to him. "You stole these?"
His black eyes gleamed, he gave me a lopsided grin. "You must be a bad influence on me."
I chose to ignore his stupid excuse to anger me and turn back to the crowds of laughter and freedom. "What are they celebrating?"
"It's one of our traditions, legends, tonight is a full moon, we celebrate the death of Chaska Eldar."
"Who?"
"She was a great warrior thousands of years ago, though her story is quite tragic."
After a few suspenseful moments passed, I couldn't help it. "Are you going to enlighten me with it?"
"You are a curious kitten aren't you?"
I scrunched up my face at his words. I was a curious person but he didn't have to word it in such a way. I noticed how far his hood was over his face, concealing his identity, he didn't want his people to know who he was, or else he would have just bought the masks. He was so confusing, there were so many secrets to him, around him, evolving him, that I didn't want to find out. He leaned against one of the alley's under one of the beautiful designed arches. I stood across from him, observing him, waiting for him to continue, I would not ask twice.
"You're also stubborn, good to know," he exclaimed. I made a face at him, he ignored it. "Chaska Eldar was a simple servant girl, she lived here when it was just a village, many many years ago. She was young, maybe seventeen or eighteen, she had nothing but one younger brother, her parents had died years before. Around her time there was a war going on, against her country and the one across the sea. The problem with this was the one across the sea was very powerful. They had more people, more weapons. One day they chose to attack her small village, Chaska had been out by the mountains picking lilies for her brother's birthday, they were his favorite. When she got back everything was destroyed, her first thought was her brother, she ran to their cottage, wishing, hoping, praying that he was okay."
I leaned forward, unintentionally, waiting for him to continue.
"When she got there she found him. His head had been cut off and hung on their doorstep. She was devastated; she screamed for hours, loud enough for the gods to hear her pain and agony. And they did, Chaska suddenly saw a white light coming from the woods beside her, alone and empty she decided to follow it. There was a beautiful girl wearing white silk, she had golden brown skin and dark black enchanting eyes."
"The girl said her name was Aster and that she was the goddess of the fire, Chaska didn't believe her at first, but then Aster held out her hand and let a little flame danced across her fingertips. She said, 'what I say is true, I heard your cries for help Chaska Eldar, and I am here to grant them.'"
"Chaska immediately asked if she was going to bring her brother back, Aster told her she sadly didn't have the power to do so but she could help her get revenge and help her people. Aster gave her the power that she bore, the power of heat and flames and told her she may use this power as long as she does not abuse it. Chaska accepted it, she wanted revenge on the men who killed her brother, she had changed that day, she became strong and coldhearted to everyone but her people. Chaska used this power to help them, she set cities to flames and ash. She protected children who had lost everything. And though she killed many of the sea people, it wasn't enough for her, she wanted the king."
"So she ventured across the sea and found his castle but she did not kill him right away, no, she wanted him to suffer as she had suffered. She found his family and slaughtered them all, but she did it slowly, one at a time, every few weeks to make the king's suffering more extreme and painful. To give him hope for a couple of weeks only for it to be ripped away from him the next. She finally got to the king and when she did, he begged her to kill him. He could not live through his suffering. She was happy to grant his wish but when she went to ignite her flame, it was gone. It was then Aster appeared once again and told her, 'You have abused my power Chaska Eldar, you've killed many innocent women and children for your own sake. So I shall take it away.'"
"Chaska begged her to just let her end the kings life first but Aster refused to give her the power back and told her she would give it to Chaska's people instead, only the deserving, the ones who would never murder innocent children, the ones who could control it. And then Aster disappeared. Chaska, now being helpless, tried to run from the king but the king was skilled with a weapon and stabbed her in the heart, ending her life."
I heard shouts of laughter from beside us, I blinked, so invested in the story I forgot we were in the middle of a parade. "That's it? She just died?"
"Yes, and though she was somewhat bad, we celebrate her for saving our people."
The atmosphere around us had suddenly shifted becoming more deep, thick and meaningful. The look in Raiden's eyes was different, serious, I wondered how he could see the world and its tragedies and yet still celebrate them. I cleared my throat. "What exactly do you do on this day?"
"We praise Chaska. We dance until our feet fall off and drink until we are passed out on the ground, you know have fun."
I narrowed my eyes at his dark ones. "And why did you bring me?"
"Are you always so trusting?" he asked bluntly.
"Do you always deflect questions?"
He held out his arm, offering it to me. "Shall we join the party?"
I smiled and soon realized it was out of arrogance. "You do realize you just proved my point?"
He raised his eyebrows, his expression said, 'don't test me'. I just smiled. I understood now why he was the way he was around me. I understood the joy of angering him, it felt great. I looked at his arm and then purposely walked passed him.
I wandered down a different street, full of markets and more vendors. They had all the little trinkets you could think of. I clenched my fists and forced myself to walk past them. But then something caught my eye. It was a dark violet dress made of silk and lace. It was lovely. I'd never liked dresses but this one ... was beautiful, alluring. I walked over to it. Running my fingers over it. I felt that want in my chest, that need, the thrill of danger. No. No, I couldn't, I-
"Take it," a deep voice said from behind me. I whirled around to Raiden. He had a mischievous look in his eyes.
Did he just encourage me to steal from his own people?
"I- no!" I huffed. I looked around making sure the owner wasn't around while we had this conversation.
"Why not?" he grinned. "Steal, Little Thief."
I looked back at the dress, the pull was there. I wanted to take it. I wanted to give in to that voice in my head. No! I couldn't. It was wrong and selfish, the person who made this probably needed the money. As I ran my fingers over the neckline there was a very strong need, a want, it made my heart pound fast and tingles run down my arms. I looked back at Raiden. "I've only ever ... taken jewelry."
The shopower appeared out of the back, he was somewhat old, he had dark hair that was graying and wrinkles under his eyes along with dark circles. "You're interested in the dress?"
"Actually," Raiden stepped forward in front of me, blocking me from the shop owners view, making it look discreet. He gave me a look over his shoulder. He talked to the store owner in a kind voice and told him he was interested in the knives that were hanging behind him. He was distracting him for me. Before I could stop myself I unhooked the dress, quietly. My heart pounded severely, trying to leap out of my chest.
I swallowed down the panicky feeling, it was quickly replaced with some type of adrenaline. Raiden still chatted with the shop owner pretending to be interested in his life. I could almost laugh at the fake kindness in his voice, it was so fake it almost sounded sarcastic. I shoved the dress into my bag and smiled at my success.
"Hey!" I heard an angry voice snap. I swiveled my head in the direction and saw two guards about thirty feet away looking at me.
Oh god.
"Uh ... Raiden?" I pulled on his sleeve, he turned quickly in my direction, I pointed to the direction of the guards.
He acted quickly not even bothering to seem scared or surprised, he grabbed my hand and pulled me into the crowd. The electricity of adrenaline shot through my veins. The guards started striding fiercely to us.
"Run," said Raiden.
He didn't have to tell me twice.
We both started running, the guards following rapidly in pursuit. "Stop right there!" one of them shouted. "You're under arrest!"
They were now only ten or fifteen feet away. My heart pulsed erratically in my chest. My throat closed with panic. What if we got caught? We pushed past many people, some of them carrying loads of stuff that fell out of their hands. "Sorry!" I shouted as we passed by a girl who dropped all her food on the ground.
Raiden had the audacity to not care at all. Thrills of excitement coursed through me, I was afraid but at the same time I felt ... good. It was strange and I couldn't explain it. The fear of getting caught ... excited me? No. No, it was all in my head. I didn't feel that way. I felt bad and selfish for causing such a commotion on their holiday.
I am good. Stealing the dress was a mistake and I felt terrible for it.
Once we were far away from the guards Raiden stealthily turned us into an alley and into a little alcove. Our chests brushed together, softly. I heard footsteps parade into the alley, but I couldn't see them. "I could've sworn I saw them come down here," one of them said. "Damned thieves." with that they walked away.
Relief like I'd never felt before washed over me. My voice was a soft whisper when I said, "I can't believe we got away with that." I suddenly got the strong urge to laugh. I felt light, free, like I could do anything. A giggle came from my lips before I could stop it.
Raiden's eyes widened in surprise before he let a smile of his own grace his gorgeous face. It looked strange on him, a smile that was not arrogant. I laughed more at him. I can't believe he made me do that! I couldn't believe how good it felt.
Raiden observed me watching me laugh like a lunatic, there was something glittering in his eyes, something I refused to describe. There was a suffocating energy around us that was consuming me. Drowning me. And maybe not in a good way. My laughter died slowly.
... What am I doing?
Why am I having fun? With him? He's evil. He hurt my friends. He took me, he's a bad guy. He's just pretending. Was there something wrong with me? How could I be so ignorant? I hate him! I was not having fun with him. He was just manipulating me. I stepped out of the alcove, away from him. For some reason I couldn't focus when he was that close. "I want to go back."
I knew he sensed the change in my attitude, he wasn't an idiot. He sighed like he knew exactly what was coming. "But the parade hasn't ended."
"Why do you hate Devara's?" I blurted out of nowhere. I was tired of him being nice. So I asked him something that I knew would hit too close. A part of me wanted to see him angry, so I could hate him. I do hate him!
His face dropped, like I knew it would, he became cold, more cold than I'd seen him before. He was now cruel and vicious, not caring if he hurt me or not. His jaw shut tightly. "Don't ask me that, Avaryn."
I scoffed at his cold voice. "You sound like your father when you're angry."
That was the wrong thing to say. I knew that. But I said it anyway to make him angry. I was looking for a fight and I didn't know why. He grabbed my arm in an instant, pulling me against his chest, our faces close together, we breathed the same air.
We were enemies and this night didn't change that. It didn't change how much I hated him and how much he hated me.
I could see the emptiness in his dark gaze.
His voice was lethal; it actually made fear pulse through me. "Don't." one word. And it absolutely terrified me. It terrified me how he could go from being so nice one second and a monster the next. I could feel his wrath like a dark shadow looming down on me. "Don't push me."
I wouldn't let him see how much he frightened me. I wouldn't let him have the satisfaction. I was strong.
Quicker than I knew I could move, I grabbed the dagger from my waist and pointed it to his chest before he could react. The tip of it poked at his center. I ripped my arm from his grip but stayed close to him. So he could feel the truth in my words. "If you touch me again, I'll put this dagger through your heart.'' I would put it in the same spot he put his in Everson.
Instead of fear or anger in his black gaze I saw a challenge. I saw ... excitement. He was deranged. He was a literal sociopath! He was excited that I said I would put a dagger in his chest? I saw the dare in his eyes.
He dared me to do it.
And somewhere behind that I saw ... pride?
I dropped the dagger, my hands trembling. I swallowed down the feeling in my chest, that familiar pull, the faraway excitement buried deep down in the pit in my stomach. It was too much. I was terrible. I just threatened him! And I like it! No. I refused to believe that's what that was. My mind is just playing tricks on me. My emotions were mixed. It was nothing else. I was not like him. I wasn't like my father. I was good. I was good.
"I want to go back."
***
Nisha and I talked for hours. Well Nisha, talked and I listened. She told me about her hopes, her dreams. She wanted to be an actor. That was her dream. She wanted to go to the human realm and she wanted to be a star. She talked about it with such fascination, such longing, it was alluring to listen to her talk about.
She found an old magazine one time on the streets of Arawyn and that's when it all began.
She told me about Nao. She told me how she'd been secretly in love with him since she was twelve, which is when she came to work here. I did not ask her how or why she was here, I somehow felt that she would not want to talk about.
Nisha was a light. She gave me hope. She reminded me of Nyan in that way. While I'm not happy about being here, I was glad I met her in the process. She made being here better. She gave me hope.
If I found a way out of here, I was going to take her with me. And I was going to see that she lives out her dreams.
The king wished to see me again. To discuss his plans with me. But there was no need, I already knew what he wanted from me and I wouldn't do it.
"Stop doing that!" Nisha hissed, smacking my hand away from my mouth. Biting my nails was a nervous habit. "You'll be fine," she assured and continued braiding my hair back.
I knew that but there was a strange feeling in the pit of my stomach that I just couldn't get rid of.
"Will you be wearing a dress?"
I shot her a look.
"That is extremely foolish of you, I thought you were more intelligent than that."
I was but I wouldn't let him control me. I couldnt, and maybe I was stupid for it but I didnt care, I wanted to show him that his demands meant nothing to me, that he was not my king and he never would be.
I felt Nisha sigh from behind me. "It's time."
We left the room and wandered through the corridors until we reached the wretched doors of the throne room. The guards opened the doors for me and I strode in, I kept my chin high and my expression neutral. Nisha followed closely behind me.
Nisha bowed, I did not.
"Avaryn," the king greeted.
I said nothing, my eyes unintentionally flicked to Raiden who was to the left of the King. He discreetly shook his head, warning me. I hadn't talked to him since the festival. And I didn't want to, I didn't trust him. Roz stayed quiet the whole time, like she did before.
"It's time for you to start your training," the king told, his tone was harsh, he was not pleased with me.
I felt my eyebrows narrow. "Training?"
"Training to use The Vad, which you will do. But I need your trust first."
I hadnt meant for a laugh to come from my throat, I swear, but it did, and I couldn't stop. The king was infuriated by my laughter, he had murder in his eyes. "I'm sorry, but that has to be a joke, right?"
"Avaryn," Raiden warned, but I didn't care. I couldn't stop now.
"You do realize that you kidnapped me right? That you're a monster? That i will never give my trust to someone like you? That i will not use the Vad against my people-"
It happened quickly, so suddenly it was like the blink of an eye. One moment the king was on his throne looking majorly pissed off and the next he was in front of me holding me by my neck. A choking noise came up from my throat, I couldn't breathe.
Raiden stood up. "Father-"
"You will not disrespect me in my castle when I have done so much for you."
Maybe I was crazy, I mean I was on the brink of death, but I couldn't help the giggle that came from me, it was mixed with a whimper. He gripped my throat tighter. I gasped loudly for air but there wasn't any, my lungs were suffocating. My vision started turning into spots of black, it reminded me of stars. Everything was fuzzy.
"You can't kill her," a voice said; perhaps with fury, perhaps with panic. "She needs her strength for training."
After a moment the king suddenly let go, I fell to the ground sucking in gasps of air, but it wasn't enough. I still felt like I was suffocating.
"You," I heard the king say to someone.
"Come here."
I grew enough strength to look up and saw he was talking to Nisha. No. Not Nisha.
"Ah, so you care for the young servant?" the king cruelly asked in my direction. Had I said my concerns outloud?
The king looked to one of the guards and said, "Five lashes."
"No!" I shouted and tried to get up, I struggled but made it to my feet. I swiftly tried to run to Nisha but the king turned to someone who was behind me and said, "Hold her." I felt arms grab me tightly, I struggled to get out of their grip, I tried to get to her but I couldn't break free.
Nisha strode forward, she had her head pointed to the ground, she didn't make eye contact with the king but her eyes quickly averted to me for a split second. The absolute terror in her eyes broke me. She kneeled in front of the king. The guards took out a whip.
"Please!" I screamed as horror filled me. "I'll do what you want, I swear-" but my pleas were cut off by an agonizing cry. The guard whipped Nisha once. Right in front of me. She screamed and cried out but she did not move. She stayed kneeled down in front of the king with no one holding her down. The guard whipped her again.
This is my fault. This is all my fault.
I elbowed and kicked the person who was holding me but they wouldn't let go. "Let me go!" but their grip didn't let up.
"If you don't stop struggling you'll make it worse," the deep voice whispered in my ear, his arms wrapped around me tighter as if in warning. Raiden kept his mouth at my ear. "Unless you want him to kill her I suggest you shut your mouth."
Even though it took everything in me to stop screaming, I clamped my mouth shut and stopped fighting him. I endured the pain of hearing her suffer. Each cry and scream that came from her broke a part of me. I hadn't known Nisha long but she had made a great impression on my life. She made me less afraid to be here, her goodness gave me hope.
I felt a sob erupt from my throat but I didn't hear it, all I heard were the screams that came from her. Her dark hair hung down around her, creating a curtain around her face. I couldn't see her expression. But I could hear her torure, her anguish.
It was the worst thing I have ever seen in my life. Someone whipping someone. A person I cared about. Something inside me had shut down. It was like my mind left my body, and I couldn't think or feel, I could only watch and silently suffer. I felt ... lost. Broken. Truly hopeless for the first time since I've been here.
Raiden's thumbs at my waist started rubbing in soothing circles as if to comfort me, calm me. I didnt even think he was aware he was doing it. I was barely aware he was doing it. When it was over I heard the king tell another guard to take her away. This made me jump back into place and my limbs tense, just as I was going to open my mouth, Raiden spoke softly in my ear, "They are just taking her to the infirmary." His voice was gentle, the most soft and comforting I'd ever heard from him. He somehow knew exactly what I was thinking.
The king walked over to us and I unthinkingly leaned back into Raiden's arms, my body mistakenly thinking he would protect me. The king was past rage but as soon as he saw my face a sliver of satisfaction filled his. He grabbed my chin, hard and pulled it towards him. I felt Raiden's grip tighten on me as if he wanted to pull me away from his father but he didn't. I knew he wouldn't.
"You will obey me from now on or she will die. You shall bow when you see me and look presentable, you will control the Vad or I will do much worse to the people you care about." With that he looked behind me at Raiden. "Take her to her room." He then smirked. "And lock the doors."
***
When I was a kid my father once woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me that there was somebody in my room. He said there was a demon trying to take me, eat me, but that we couldn't see it. Being only six years old of course I believed him, I screamed and cried, I was terrified. My father said that he could hear them, they talked to him, they told him that they wanted to take me.
I kept trying to leave the room, I begged him to let me leave. But he wouldn't let me, he told me that if he had to hear them then I had to stay in the room with them. He locked me in after that. He locked me in, a six year old child who believed there were demons in her room. He continued to do this until I was nine. He would come into my room after my mom fell asleep and he would lock me inside.
It was not till I was thirteen or fourteen when I understood that it was psychological abuse.
I would not be locked in a room again.
I shifted towards Raiden in the stone corridor, my footsteps halting, making an echoing noise. I hated this damn castle and everything about it. "I want to go to the infirmary."
"Well, it's good to want things," he replied bitterly and pulled me forward in the direction of my room.
"Raiden-"
"No."
He was being an ass. He was angry, I could practically feel it. His fists clenched and his jaw was screwed tightly shut. I ripped my arm from his grasp.
"I wasn't asking," I growled up at his stupid angry face. His dark gaze was filled with rage and ... something else as he looked at me. Before he could do anything I turned on my heels and walked in the other direction.
If he wouldn't tell me where the infirmary was I would find it myself.
"You're going the wrong way, darling," he said, mockingly. Ah. There it was. His charming attitude. The one where he was obnoxious and pretends he cared for nothing.
I halted, my jaw clenching.
I swung back around towards him, annoyance sparkling through me. "Take me to Nisha."
He leaned against the wall, carelessly full of pride and arrogance. He took enjoyment in my anger, I knew he did. "No." I dared him to do it. With my eyes I dared him to give me that cocky smirk of his. Slowly his lips twitched up when he saw the fury on my face.
I growled in frustration and before I knew what I was doing I pulled out my knife and held it against his throat, putting him against the corridor wall in the process. I didn't care that we were in the middle of the hall, I didn't care that anyone could see. A strange sort of power filled my veins. The power of control. Strength. "Take me to Nisha."
Something flared in his dark gaze and it was most definitely not fear. He smiled, slowly, mischievously.
He ... smiled?
Smiled.
I was baffled. He should be afraid. He was smiling like I wasn't threatening to slice through his jugular!
There was no fear in his eyes, more like curiosity. "You do realize the only reason you can do this is because I allow you too, right?"
I narrowed my eyes and pressed the dagger harder against his throat. "You don't think I would do it?"
"I would never underestimate you, darling." quicker than I could see, he grabbed my arms and twisted them around, I felt the knife fall from my hand. Somehow, in the matter of seconds, I managed to be the one pressed against a wall with a dagger to my throat.
He leaned forward, my back straightened as my breath caught. His nose almost grazed mine as the cold silver knife pressed against the crescent of my skin.
How-how did he do that?
"All I'm saying is that I could easily get out of it, so the only reason you can point your knives at me and throw around worthless threats is because I allow you to."
Annoyance mixed with something I didn't want to mistake as thrill spurred in my stomach. Goosebumps erupted on my skin and my heart pounded. He was provoking me. On purpose, I didn't know why but I wouldn't let him have the satisfaction of seeing me aggravated.
I smiled sharply, perhaps even arrogantly, hoping to seem unaffected. "Take me to Nisha."
He said nothing for several moments just stayed within a breaths length of my face driving me crazy with frustration. I wanted to hit him, hell I wished I stabbed him when I had the chance. I loathed him, everything about him pricked my buttons, I wasn't usually a bothered person but he made me want to blow my own head off.
His eyes stared into mine, we were both infuriated and triggered. I saw it in his gaze as he saw it in mine. His dark eyes swirled with the purest anger, fury, and resentment. Maybe he hated me. Maybe I didn't care, maybe I did.
His eyes were quite extraordinary, they were like the darkest shade of the night sky, the color of an obsidian blade, they were filled with demons and pain, similar to my own. After a minute he stepped back from me and held out the dagger, giving it back. "As you wish."
"What?" I gasped. I stared down at his hand that was extended to me with my knife in it. Skepticism filled through me. He was just going to give it back? Again? After I've threatened him, twice?
"You asked for something and I granted it."
"Then why the hell did you not grant it before-?"
"Must you complain about everything? I obeyed your foolish demands, now shut your mouth and follow me."
My nostrils flared, I snatched my dagger back from him, tucking it into my waist and hiding it with my shirt, then followed close behind him. Shut my mouth? Why doesn't he shut his mouth? He was annoying and aggravating just to be annoying and aggravating.
The infirmary was surprisingly close to where we were. Raiden stayed outside and told me I only had ten minutes. The walls were stone and lined with windows, there were at least ten beds lined up next to each other making it look like a hospital. Nisha was the only one who was occupying one of the beds. She layed on her stomach, I assumed it was way too painful for her to be on her back. She was asleep or passed out from the pain, I hoped they gave her something for that. Was there even medication in this realm? Everything seemed so medieval, I couldn't tell.
Bandages wrapped around the entirety of her back and even though I could tell she was well treated there was still blood seeping through. I suddenly felt like I was going to throw up. I had always been queasy around blood but the reason of my sickness was the fact and knowledge that the whole reason she was here was because of me.
Tears welled in the corners of my eyes.
I should've just kept my mouth shut. I should've worn a stupid dress. I gently pressed my hand on hers. "We're going to get out of here," I whispered, my throat closing and tears filling my eyes. "I promise, I'll find a way."
At the doors of my room I turned to Raiden intending to speak to him for the first time since our little argument. But he spoke before I could get a word out. "Are you ..." he cleared his throat and looked away from me. "Are you okay?"
Tears filled my eyes without meaning. Why was I alway crying? Crying never solved any problems. I leaned my head against the door letting the blonde hair that fell in front of my face block me so he couldn't see my tears. I hate when people ask if you're okay when you're clearly not. It ruins all my strength.
I didn't trust Raiden's kindness, it was confusing but for some reason I didn't shut my mouth like I should've, I showed stupid weakness. "Its my fault," my voice had dropped low and raspy from crying.
"Yeah ... it is."
I peeked through my golden hair to glare at him.
His light eyebrows rose up on his golden brown skin. "If you're looking for pity you won't find it in me."
"I'm not looking for pity," I growled.
"Good, because it was your fault. I warned you to stop talking." his words were the truth but he didn't have to be so harsh. He at least could have softened his voice instead of sounding cold and viscous. "But," he started. "Nothing would've happened in the first place if my father wasn't a cruel man."
I lifted my head from the door and turned towards him. "Raiden?"
He smiled, it wasn't his usual smile. It was genuine and I had no idea what it was for. It was the kind of smile that took over his whole face, brighted his eyes and expression. It was deceiving because now he looked kind when in reality he was not. "Yes, darling?"
I rolled my eyes, he insisted on calling me that to piss me off. "Will you not lock my doors? I know you were told to, but I can't sleep when they are locked. I swear, I won't go any-"
"I won't lock them."
I squinted up at him, he blinked down at me as if it was nothing. Just like that? I didn't have to convince him? He just agreed? He didn't question why? I wanted to question his kindness. It had to be a lie. I didn't know why but it just had to be.
"But-"
"Goodnight, little thief."
Before I could protest he walked away. He walked away before I could ask my nosey questions. I laid on my bed wondering why Raiden didn't lock the doors. I wondered how Nisha was doing. I wondered how Everson was doing. I wondered how the hell I was going to get out of this place. But mostly I thought about my friends, my home. What were they doing? Were they worried about me? Were they trying to find me? Would they hate me once they found out what I really am?
I didn't sleep at all that night.
••••
THIS IS THE LONGEST CHAPTER IVE EVER POSTED ON WATTPAD I AM SO SORRY.
I'm sorry that this chapter is like eight years long I didn't even know! Anyway I know I like have to have a schedule and like wait to post but like it's so hard for me 🏃🏻♀️
It kinda gives me anxiety that the whole book isn't posted so I might just post it all tbh
Anyway how y'all like the shadow realm?
Ngl i miss my baby Devaras 😔
I hope you all have a great day, bye loves ! 🥰
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