I used to complain about not feeling enough and now ... now I felt everything and I wasn't sure I liked it. A part of me wishes I was numb again. I breathe in the cold night air as I stand on the large balcony of some sort of music room. I couldn't sleep. I hadn't been able to sleep for the two nights I'd been here.

I wished I could just put away my thoughts, block them away when I don't want them. I wanted to feel the bliss of nothingness. The nothingness was peaceful. The nothingness was calm. In the nothingness Nisha didn't exist.

I sunk on to the cold stone of the balcony and then drifted to lie on my back. The stars were beautiful here. Magical even. I could see almost every constellation. The moon watched over me, peering down at me with all its greatness and brightness.

My eyes drifted closed, not because I was tired but because I couldn't handle looking into the eyes of the moon any longer.

Was Nisha up there somewhere? In some cultures people believed that once you die you become a star; you look down over your loved ones and protect them like shining armor.

Or was Nisha in heaven?

I will never know.

At that moment I felt someone near me. Standing over me. I had not heard any footsteps but that didn't frighten me. Because I already knew who it was. I could somehow always sense when it was him near me. I could feel the heat from him, coming off him and spreading over me like a cozy blanket.

Wind ruffled my hair and the scent of cinnamon spice drifted through the air. He didn't say anything as he sat down next to where I lied.

I kept my eyes closed as I muttered to him in the night air, "tell me a story."

Almost every night for a week I had fallen asleep to Raiden telling me stories. He was good at that for absolutely no reason. He could make me fall asleep leaning on every word that fell from his mouth, it was a strange thing to be able to do but every time he opened his mouth I was out like a light.

I felt his fingers drift through my hair. I did not freeze. I did not have any reaction. I simply let him. It was not a sexual act, more of a comforting gesture. For him or for me? I was not sure of that, all I knew was I let him do it and I didn't mind it one bit. But I tried very hard to ignore the goosebumps that traveled down my arms.

A story drifted from his lips with ease. A story about a boy who grew to be a villain. I had never heard this story from him before. He usually told me of Chaska.

This boy was different though. This boy was weak. Powerless. He was rejected by his family and his people. They did not accept him for who he was. They thought him dirty. So this boy did everything he could to please them. So that maybe one day they would appreciate him. Maybe one day they would love him.

He had hope because one person already did love him, unconditionally. His mother. His mother was the most important anyway so none of the rest mattered. As long as he had her he would be fine.

He spent most of his life working his way to the top. This boy had hopes and dreams. He wanted to be the best magic wielder in the village. And even though everyone looked down on him he only felt hope and joy, he was certain they would love him someday.

Until one day when he was thirteen his mother was killed.

And this burning rage took over the boy and long washed away his hope and joy. He no longer cared what people thought of him as long as they looked at him and felt one thing; fear.

He made them fear him and he enjoyed every second of it.

He burned cities to the ground and he felt nothing but satisfaction. He did not care about anyone but himself. And he vowed to himself that one day he would get revenge on his mothers killers and his wrath would be worse than the burning of a city. He would bring them the living hell. He would be the devil and he would make them suffer for their sins.

This boy was Raiden.

I knew it the moment the words came from his mouth. And he knew that I would know it too. And yet he told me anyway. Why? Why would he ever let himself be so vulnerable? Was this his way of trying to open up to me?

I was in and out of consciousness when I felt myself being lifted into his arms. I wanted to ask him about his mother. I wanted him to tell me more but I couldn't open my mouth. I was so tired.

I tried to mutter his name and I think I might've because I felt his arms tighten around me as if in response.

He lied me on my bed and I struggled to open my eyes but it was no use. I was too far gone.

"When this is all over," I heard him whisper. It was so light and breathy I thought I might've imagined it. It was a desperate whisper to nobody but the night air. He thought I could not hear him. There was a strange desperation in his voice although I wasn't sure I didn't imagine that either. "Please don't hate me."

Since when did Raiden beg for anything?

For the first time since he sat next to me, I managed to open my eyes.

Only to see that he was gone and I was alone in my room.

***

Everson

The walls were lined with gold. Not that that was new to him, he'd been to Sorins castle a dozen times by now but the structure still fascinated him. This castle brought back memories of his good days. The days he didn't think about anyone but himself. His favorite days.

He stared at the walls and remembered what they had felt like on his back. When he was pressed against them with Sorins lips devouring his body.

That was nearly ten years ago.

Gods, he was getting old.

A sudden pain struck in his chest and he fought it down quickly. The poison that was brewing in him made an appearance every now and then. It wouldn't kill him but it would weaken him.

And Octavious.

"Dinner is at seven," a smooth voice said from behind him.

Ever turned to see Sorin, a flirtatious smile on his lips.

Today wasn't as bad as most, but Everson was always up for a distraction and this one had wings and a wicked smile. Before he knew it they were in the sitting room, and there was touching, and biting. Sorins lips were on his and the pain that was a constant in Evers chest had washed away temporarily. Evers back was pressed against one of the gold-lined walls and he now remembered what it felt like. It hurt. But he didn't care.

Nothing mattered.

And then the door opened.

Ever ripped away from Sorins mouth to see his worst fear in the doorway.

Octavious.

Octavious's dark eyes went from Everson to Sorin and then to the position they were both in, something like hurt flashed in his gaze. But no that couldn't be. It was only Evers head that made him see what he wanted.

Sorin cleared his throat and stepped away from Ever. He patted his chest and smiled. "well, I guess i'll see you both at dinner." and he walked out leaving Ever and Octavious alone.

Octavious said nothing, just stared. So Ever buttoned up his shirt and walked over to where a crystal jug of bourbon layed and poured himself a glass. His hands were shaking.

"Are you still mad at me?" asked Octavious.

Ever froze. Mad at him?

"No," Ever replied.

He felt Octavious behind him. Even though he moved at the speed of light, Ever heard him, he had sensed him. He had memorized the way Octavious moved and the sound of his feet striking the earth. He would always know when he was near.

"Then why are you doing this?" Octavious asked, a small waver in his voice.

"Me and Sorin?" Ever questioned. "What does that have to do with me being angry at you?"

Was he jealous?

"Just that every time you and I get into a fight you tend to do stupid reckless things. Don't think I don't notice Everson."

Of course. That made sense.

Ever finally turned around, so he was staring into Octavious's dark eyes. They were about the same height, though Ever was a few inches shorter. Ever put on a smile. "That has nothing to do with you and everything to do with the fact that Sorin is just a good screw." 

A flash in Octavious's eyes and Ever didn't know what it meant. "You've been with Sorin before?"

Ever shrugged. "Here and there."

"That's completely dangerous. Fae's are-"

"Don't worry mom, I use protection," Ever snickered.

A blush crept up Octavious's throat and Ever couldn't help but feel satisfaction. He was so pure. He enjoyed ruffling his feathers. It was fun to watch Octavious squirm at the mention of sex. "That's- That's not what I mean and you know it. Faes are dangerous to us."

"You don't trust Sorin?"

"I do, I just ..." he swallowed and his brows lowered as concern etched on them. "I don't want to see you hurt."

"I'm fine," Ever snapped bitterly, a very fake smile on his face, "thanks to you."

Understanding flickered across Octavious's face. "You are still mad."

"Why would I be mad Octavious?" Ever drawled and flopped down on one of the pretty sofas. The drink in his hand splattered a bit but he didn't care. He took a big gulp and accepted the satisfying burn that came with it. "You only put yourself somewhere you have no place to be."

"No place?" Octavious's voice rose.

Here we go, Ever thought. For the last week he had been avoiding this conversation. Actually he had been ignoring Octavious in general.

They were destined to fight. In the past it was always about stupid things but now ... Now this argument mattered and it absolutely terrified Ever because he had no idea what was going to happen. But he was angry. And he wasn't a good enough person to act like he wasn't.

"No place? Everson you are my best friend! I had every right to take that poison from you."

Octavious was angry too it seemed. Octavious was not the raging type, no that was all Ever, but sometimes he made exceptions. Those expectations being Ever. Octavious only seemed to ever get angry at him. Maybe it was a talent of his. He could piss off even the purest of hearts.

Ever got up from the sofa, real, deep emotions blurred through him. He wanted to fight them down but it was no use. He took a step toward where Octavious glared at him. "You had no right to manipulate my power. And you know damn well that if I were conscious I would not have allowed it. You went against me. And you broke a vow while doing it."

There was a sudden intensity between them, a tension Ever could not explain. He felt angry, but he also felt something else. A longing, he realized. It was that same longing he'd had since he were fifteen. That desperate need he had to grab Octavious and kiss him, that wild desire for Octavious and him only.

"It was a stupid vow we made when we were kids," Octavious tried to defend but he could see the anguish in his eyes. The guilt.

"And yet both of us spent a hundred years never breaking it."

"I could not watch you die."

Those were the words he said before. Only now they were whispered with so much pain and desperation. He didn't want to cause Octavious pain. Never would he want that. 

Suddenly Octavious lifted a hand to Eversons face, cupping his cheek gently. Shock tore its way through his chest and he froze. He thinks he's forgotten how to breathe, how to speak. He blinked up at him, too afraid to move. If he moved would Octavious drop his hand? He thought he might die right there if he let go. Octavious seemed to study every inch of Evers face as if in fascination and wonder. "If you died ..." Octavious's voice broke gently. He stared so strongly into Evers eyes, a new vulnerability in his. Ever had never seen that look from Octavious before. Octavious leaned his forehead against his In anguish.

Oh Gods. He couldn't breathe.

"... I couldn't bear it."

And then he kissed him.

Ever thought he might faint. This couldn't be happening. This had to be all in his head right? This couldn't be real. Tingles shot through his body and with a shocking realization he knew this was really happening.

Ever moaned softly and gripped Octavious tighter, afraid to let go. Afraid that if he did this image would wash away into one of his daydreams.

Oh Gods.

This was real.

Ever had kissed many people throughout his life but none of them had ever felt like this. Like Octavious. It was everything he'd imagined and more. Octavious tasted sweet and stubborn on his lips. He wanted more and more and more.

At that moment everything froze. It was like the world had stopped spinning and the stars had a-lined. The universe had paused for a fraction of a minute to give Ever this moment. In that moment everything was perfect. In that moment he was free. In that moment he was ...

He was kissing his sister's boyfriend.

Reality decided to hit Ever in the chest like a bullet. He quickly ripped himself away from Octavious. His eyes were wide and unblinking before Ever, he seemed to be just as shocked as Ever. "you can't," Ever rasped.

"Why not?"

Why not?

Why not?

So many reasons. So many stupid reasons. Reasons he wanted to smash and burn away from existence.

Ever shook his head and decided to tell him the unbearable truth. Agony ripped through his words, "You can't kiss me. Not when I've spent half my life longing for it. Not when you don't mean it."

And then he walked away, which was probably the most noble and selfless thing he had ever done. Ever was a selfish person, when he wants something he takes it. But he could not be selfish with Octavious. Never him. Not when he loved him so much. 

***

Avaryn

I could not stand being around Sorin.

Something about him irked me to my core. He was creepy. And the way he walked was strange, he glided around as if not holding himself up all the way. Dinner was as bad as one would think it to be.

First things first. Raiden showed up.

Yay.

I'm almost one hundred percent sure he wouldn't have if I wouldn't have said what I said to him before. What was I thinking? I shouldn't have even mentioned the kiss. Now he was going to use it against me.

He was going to turn this into a game.

I seriously hated him.

I hated his ... Well his personality? Maybe. It was okay sometimes when he's not being a total jackass. And I certainly did not hate his face. No, not his face. I actually quite liked his face. It was nice to look at. Especially his eyes. And his lips-

No.

Not his lips.

To make matters worse he decided to sit right next to me. So close I could feel the heat from his body.

I was almost certain last night had never happened. He didn't tell me the story of his childhood and he didn't bring me to my bed from the balcony. Had I dreamed it?

Please don't hate me, he had said. It was definitely my imagination. Raiden would never say something so stupid. Because when this is all over I will hate him. Because we both know at the end of this he's going to attempt to kill my friends. And I would most certainly hate him for it.

Everson sat on the right of me, his knee bouncing up and down and his eyes fogged as if in deep thought. Oh no. something had to be terribly wrong for him to be thinking so hard. I wondered what was going on. Was he nervous because of Raiden?

The girls tell Bash of my fire powers.

His dark brows raise and he turns to me. "When did that ability acquire?"

I swallowed. "Uh ... I don't really know it just appeared,'' I lied, feeling Raidens confused stare burning into me.

He's wondering why I didn't tell them the truth.

I'm wondering the same thing.

"Oh," he said. "You're much more powerful than I thought." I heard a chuckle from the side of me and in an instant Bash's head whirled to Raiden. "Is there something you have to say?" Bash demands, in that leader way of his. Oh no. That would not work on Raiden. No. That would royally piss him off.

Raiden glanced at him, that cool cruel smile of his on his face. "Why would I have anything to say?" he asked but it's in that mocking way of his that's meant to piss you off.

As a warning, I kick his leg under the table.

He kicks mine right back. 

The rest of the Devaras watched the conversation silently, cautiously.

"That you Devaras are much more stupid than I presumed?" Raiden says, carelessly.

"What did you just say?" Ever growled.

Oh boy.

This is exactly what I didn't want to happen.
I glanced at Bash, only to see he had no reaction. Unconsciously I forget that Octavious is here. And I accidentally let his power flow through me, just a sliver of it.

She's lying, Bash thought in his head as he looked at me. If her power is stealing others powers It isn't possible for her to have fire power. It doesn't make sense ... Greer or Devara there is always a balance to power. So that must mean ... He looks at Raiden ... It's his.

Of course Bash would figure it out instantly.

He can't be here any longer, Bash thought. I don't want him around them. He needs to leave or ... die.

"No," I breathed. Everyone turned to me and I realized they couldn't hear Bash's thoughts like I could. Well, Octavious could but he could only read one mind at a time. I stared at Bash not caring about anything else. "You can't kill him, Bash." 

Everyone looked confused.

Understanding dawned in Bash's eyes. "You were in my head?"

I shrugged. "Does it matter? You can't kill Raiden."

Raiden chuckled from beside me and I knew it was because he knew exactly what I was thinking. And he found it hilarious of course.

"Why not?" Bash asked.

"Is it because you care about him?" Everson pressed.

"I knew you were lying to us this morning. You do trust him," said Kaida.

"Because he will kill you. I'm trying to protect you!" I said the thoughts that had been swarming in my head. My true feelings. And it was true. If they attempted to kill Raiden that was when everything would start. When Raiden would get his revenge. 

"So you think he's stronger than us?" asked Ever.

Yes. "No," I said and realized how silent Raiden was. I bet he's doing it on purpose, he's letting me defend him and he's enjoying every second of it. I let out a breath and made eye contact with Octavious.

Fix this, I whispered to him in my head, please.

His brown eyes widened a fraction and then he tried out speaking in his own head. Can-can you hear me? He whispered gently in his head.

I felt a smile on my lips. Well duh.

A small embarrassed blush crept up his throat.
Right. That's strange. What exactly do you wish for me to do?

I'm not a people pleaser, I said, I can't calm them down but I know you can. Especially Everson. I don't want to fight right now. Right now we should be plotting.

What is your relation with the Greer anyway? Octavious asked, there was no judgment laced in his words, only curiosity. Why do you so fiercely defend him?

I don't know, I whispered. But I'm serious when I say this Octavious. While he couldn't kill all of you, he would definitely kill some of you in the process. so please make them stop before that happens.

Okay.

Octavious speaks up and manages to calm everyone, everyone but Raiden. But only because I don't believe Raiden was truly bothered in the first place. I think he was just bored so he decided to start a fight. I think that's what he wants. He doesn't want peace with the Devaras. I think this was his way of saying 'hey i still hate you and i'm going to kill you one day even if we have a truce right now'.

For thirty minutes we talk about nothing. Nothing that matters anyway. Raiden stays silent by my side.

"Where do you think the other side of the Vad is?" Mara asked me from across the table next to Kaida.

"I don't know," I half lied. I have an idea of where it is but I don't like saying it in front of everyone. I'll have to ask Raiden about it later.

"So you don't have the slightest idea?" Asked Nyan.

"I-" I cut myself off with a cough the second I feel it.

The second I feel Raidens hand on my leg.

Oh god.

Oh my god.

What is he doing?

A series of tingles shot through me and spread through my whole body. I couldn't breathe suddenly. I had forgotten what his touch felt like. It feels like I'm getting burned but in a good way.

He wasn't even doing anything. Avaryn get a grip on yourself his hand is just resting on your knee. No big deal. Maybe he accidentally put it there. I mean he did look pretty zoned out. And bored.

"Ryn?" Mara asked.

"Oh ... uh," I started. Was his hand moving? Oh god I was going to pass out. Yes. he was definitely drawing patterns on my leg with his fingers. So he was aware of his hand. "Yeah, I don't know ... where it is."

I could just pull his hand off. I could just move my leg away. But I don't. I don't. I don't want to, I realize. God, there was something wrong with me. Why did I like the feeling of his touch?

Dinners over and I'm waiting in the hallway.
And then I saw him.

I grabbed his arm and pushed him against the wall. His black eyes flare for a second but then they go back to normal. My arm is against his throat and I lean up close to him so we are eye level. There was no way he wasn't letting me do this but I chose to ignore that. Our faces are close. I smile but it is as cruel as I mean it to be. "Don't ever do that again," I demanded him.

Excitement flashes in those black eyes and I can tell he is trying not to smile.

He was enjoying this.

But then again so was I.

"Hello darling," he said finally, his voice breathy and unusually thick. "What are you talking about?"   

Our chests were touching, our everything was touching considering I was smashing him against a wall. I could practically feel his lips as he talked. My heart pounded in my chest. I didn't know what I was doing. I didn't know why I was doing this. In reality I wasn't angry at him for putting his hand on my leg at dinner but I was angry that I liked it so this was my only option. "You know what I'm talking about."

His lips are so close. Barely an inch away. I see him swallow and I wonder if he's thinking the same thing.

What am I doing?

Goosebumps were all over me and I couldn't think. His scent was all around me. He was too close for me to use my brain properly. Why did I think it would be a good idea to be this close to him.

He smiled and he lifted my chin with just a finger. "If you want something from me, Avaryn, just take it."

He saw right through me. Even when I couldn't see me. It was honestly terrifying.

Just take it.

So I do.

I smashed my lips against his. This was what I wanted. This was what I was looking for. This was why I was here. Suddenly I didn't care about the consequences of kissing him. I didn't care how we would never work. I didn't care about anything.

His lips burned but I loved it.

His hands held my face and mine ran through his silky white hair. I tugged at the ends and he groaned. He pressed so I pressed back and this was a fight for dominance. His tongue slides with mine.

This was good. So good. But also bad, but I decided to ignore that part.

His mouth was hard against mine. He devours my mouth with his. This kiss was pure hunger, pure angst. It was like I was dying and Raiden was the only solution. Like I was thirsty and he was my only source of water. That's what it felt like. It felt like if I even thought of letting go of him I would die.

    His mouth rips from mine and I almost protest until his lips start moving down my neck. They move over my chin and down my throat, hungrily. A sound comes from me that I don't recognize but I couldn't care less.

    This. This was pure bliss. I didn't want this to end ever.

    I think I whispered his name because he ripped his face from my throat and pressed his lips back against mine in desperation.

    Yes.

    My hands move over his shirt, the buttons on them. I want it off. Dear god, I want it off, I want nothing between us.

    "What the fuck?" a voice says, experated, from beside us. I pulled away from Raiden so fast I wasn't sure I didn't teleport away from him.

    My eyes turn to the voice. Of course it had to be Ever. The one person who will talk shit and not care one bit about it. The one person who would call me out on my bullshit.

    His eyes flicker back and forth between me and Raiden.

His jaw hangs open.

I'm thinking of an explanation in my head. I turned to Raiden who just looked like he could care less. He looked bored. His lips were swollen. And his cheeks were flushed. Was that because of me? I felt a blush start at my cheeks.

    Ever suddenly grabbed my arm and pulled me away. "You keep your hands off her," Ever snarled at Raiden.

    Raiden only smiled, amused, and leaned against the wall like he didn't have a care in the world. "Why don't you tell her to keep her hands off me."

    Ever turned to me, saw the look in my eyes and rolled his. He dragged me away from Raiden until we couldn't see him anymore. While we were walking (well, while he was dragging me) he was muttering, "Of course you kissed him. You do have daddy issues, of course you'll go after the psycho. I suppose you are like me in that way."

He's sounded like a lunatic mumbling.

"You have daddy issues?"

"I'm in love with my sister's boyfriend, what do you think?"   

"Ever, it wasn't what it looked like."

"Oh, so you weren't shoving your tongue down his throat?"

I groaned and buried my face in my hands. "Oh god, you can't tell anyone."

"Have you met me? I wont tell a soul but I will tell you to stay the fuck away from him. You do not want to get into bed, literally, with a guy like him. Trust me, princess."

I rolled my eyes at his use of princess. Ever looked strange. He had bags under his blue eyes and his blonde hair was fluffed out like he had been running his fingers through it. "I know. Trust me I know. I don't even know why I was kissing him. I don't even like him."

"It's understandable," Ever said. "That man has the face of a God, it's a shame his personality ruins it."

"One can say the same for you Everson."

He puts a hand on his chest, truly insulted. He narrowed his eyes. "My personality is wonderful and my face is amazing. I'll have you know," he huffed. "So is this why you're putting us all in danger, because you're screwing the demon?"

"I am not screwing him!" I whisper-shouted. "It was just a kiss."

Ever raised his eyebrows.

"Fine. Two kisses. What does that matter?"

"Look I'm not going to judge you-"

"You just judged me for two minutes straight!"

"Okay? That was two seconds ago. Right now I'm not going to," he said, rolling his eyes. "Just be careful Ryn. Please."

"It won't be happening again. I swear."

***

I was at Raidens door. I just needed to ask him something about the shadow realm. Nothing else. It was probably around one am but I had a feeling he wasn't sleeping.

I knocked on the door gently.

He opened it, his eyes were sleepy and he was wearing nothing but black sweatpants.
When he saw it was me he opened the door wider, so I could come in. warmth wrapped around me as I stepped in and saw he had a fire going in his fireplace. "I'm sorry," I said. "Did I wake you?"

"No," he replied. He turned towards me, His lips twitching upward. "What do you want?"

Why did he always have to ask that question like that? Like sensual? Like it was an innuendo? Knowing him it probably was. "I-I want to ask you about the Shadow realm."

He takes a step towards me and I force myself not to take one back. I was fine. I felt nothing towards him. Nothing but hate. He leans down so we are eye level but he's not super close to me. I notice a black paint smudge beneath his eyes. I almost smiled. He was always painting. It was weird to think someone like him is capable of doing something so graceful.

"What about it?"

"Are there any mountains there?"

He smiled. "Be more specific, Love, of course there are mountains there."

I internally groaned for sounding so stupid. "Are there any snowy ones?"

He tilted his head at me. "Yeah, there's a few."

"Does any of them make you feel like your life is being sucked away if you're there for too long?"

Something clicked in his black eyes. "Yes, actually."

"Really?"

He grinned. "No."

I hit his shoulder. "I hate you," I growled. He just made me sound like an idiot for no reason.

A shimmer in his eyes and I knew he was going to say something to piss me off.

"Actually I think you rather like me."

"Well, I don't."

"We both know that's a lie."

"It can't be a lie. I suck at lying."

"That's also a lie, darling."

I practically growled at him. "I do not like you."

He leaned closer, his breath hitting my lips. His eyes staring directly into mine, so intense and filled with amusement. His hand lifted and his thumb brushed my bottom lip. "Your mouth says one thing but your lips say another, my Little Thief."

My eyes unconsciously shot to his lips. I could kiss him. He's so close. All I would have to do is lean up a few inches.  His thumb was still on my lips. He stared at them with admiration and hunger and lust. "We can't," I whispered, my voice suddenly hoarse. I closed my eyes when he started stroking my lip with his thumb.

I felt his forehead lean against mine.

"Why not?" He asked.

I soaked up his warmth. It was all around me. Suffocating me. like a warm deadly blanket.  "You know why."

"I don't think I do."

"You don't trust me."

"I don't trust anyone, love, it's not personal," he said, he assured.  "And besides you don't trust anyone either."

He was almost right. "I half trust people."

"Do you half trust me?" He whispered against my lips. My heart was pounding fiercely against my chest.

I smiled. "No. I don't trust you one bit."

He smiled back. "Good," he said right before he kissed me.

This kiss was different from the last two. This one was slow and sensual. This one was desperate. My arms slid around his neck and slid through his silky hair. I loved his hair. I loved running my fingers through it. I loved tugging on the ends and I loved the noise he made when I did.

One last kiss, I told myself.

He pressed against my lips so I pressed back. Heat shot through me. Heat and electric tingles erupt all across my arms.

My back dug into the wall and a small twinge of pain struck through me but I didn't care. I could barely feel it. Nothing mattered. That's what I found out while kissing him. When I kissed him everything went away. There was nothing but him and me. There was not a problem in the world and so long as I kept kissing him everything would be okay.
Raiden made me feel nothing and everything at the same time.

I was kissing him again. A murderer. Only now I realized I didn't care. Because I was selfish. Because kissing him felt like touching the stars and the moon. It felt like drinking fresh cold water when you're dehydrated. It felt possible and impossible all at once.

He pulled away from me only to stare into my eyes. We were still pressed against each other. As close as we could get. "I've realized that now," he said, his voice breathless and thick. "You'll never trust me." A certain sadness over took his black eyes and I wanted nothing more than to take it away. Desperation and agony and something else I couldn't describe dawned on his face. I thought I might've seen tears in his eyes.

Confusion spread through my chest.

What was he going on about?

Then his expression dropped. And a mask slid into place as easily as one could walk or breath. His eyes were cold.

Emotionless.

Gone was the boy who painted and teased me.

"We'll always be enemies," he whispered on my lips before I felt a cold metal dagger stab into my chest.

***

Y'all are about to be real mad at me for this one 😌 but is must be done. Hello my lovelies. It's been a while. Like six days.

You've reached page 350 In this book. This was where I was going to end it but I'm not sure anymore. I was planning on making this a duloagy but idk. Tell me what I should do. I've already planned everything that's going to happen. Anyways I probably won't end this here cause y'all will be mad and honestly it's not enough closure for me.

The next chapters might be from Raidens POV explains why he did what he did.

Anyways. Merry Christmas! (If you celebrate it) I hope you all had a good time and a good day!