❝ but somehow I always end up pushing people away
   I don't know why it is like that, but I'm so scared
   every night I get headaches from being anxious
   I ask myself, what if you leave? what if I'll end up being all alone again?
   that fucking scares me because I can't even be alone
   without destroying myself, without leaving red drops of blood
   I am so pathetic, and I care too much
   but at the same time, I don't care at all ❞