SIX FORGET US

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Before she was anything else, Helena was a liar. So, of course, that night she was at John B's house where JJ stayed most of the time. However, with her luck, everyone was there. The whole point of sneaking around was that no one was supposed to know it was happening save for Helena and JJ, yet here she was making eye contact with Kie, entering John B's house as the dark-haired girl was leaving.

"You confuse me endlessly," was all Kie said with a pursed smile, "Just stop breaking his heart."

Helena sighed and offered a small smile, "No promises. Maude says hi, by the way."

Kie scoffed, "Yeah, tell her I say hi, too. She knows she could just actually talk to me, right? I don't think she ever has."

"She gets shy," Helena said with a shrug, "Anyway, this was fun, but I'm pretty sure JJ is waiting for me inside."

The other girl laughed at this, a quiet grin on her face as she shrugged, "Yeah, yeah, he always is. See you later, Helena."

As she entered the home, strangely it was empty. John B wasn't there and Pope didn't make himself obvious. The only person was JJ laying on the couch, looking like he was about to fall asleep. However, once he noticed the blonde girl entering the room he shot up like he had been shocked.

"Helena, I thought you hated me," JJ said with a sigh, "You can't keep doing this, you know."

"Wasn't the point of this that emotions don't matter?" Helena asked, but her words were empty as she leaned against the doorway with crossed arms. The boy stood up from the couch and walked over to her, his expression was unreadable. She couldn't tell if he hated her or wanted to kiss her and it was driving her insane.

"There's a difference between emotions not being taken into account and being a complete asshole to me whenever you want," JJ sighed, his posture relaxed. "I'm not gonna keep this up with you if this is how you're gonna treat me. I know what I did was stupid and I'm sorry, but I'm not gonna be a punching bag for you anymore."

Helena scoffed, but she knew he was right. "Since when have you ever stood up to me?"

"Since right now because for some reason, my heart is in your hands and I can't get it back no matter how much I want to so I might as well try and make things better for me while you have it," the boy remarked with a sigh, taking a step back and turning away from her, "Besides, I'm dealing with stuff way bigger than this right now. It makes dealing with you easy."

"I'm sorry," her words surprised even herself because it was probably the first apology in her life that she actually meant. "You deserve better treatment from me, I don't... I don't have any excuses."

JJ scoffed, "Thanks, but I know you. Are you saying that because you mean it or because you want us to kiss and make up like always?"

"Is it bad if I say both?" Helena asked, "Listen, JJ, my friends fucking hate me, my own sister practically spit in my face earlier today, and I can feel my hair getting frizzy from just being her without any air conditioning because you guys still don't have power. It is in my best interest to break up whatever the hell this is and never talk to you again. I have nothing to gain from this... except I get you. That's what's important to me."

"If what's important to you is me then you're stupider than I thought you were, Hels," the boy turned to face her again, his tone deadly serious as his eyes met hers. "What do you want me to say? You can't guilt me into taking you back, I don't even know what that would mean for us because you refuse to treat me like a human being let alone a fucking boyfriend. What is this all for? What's the point of this if we don't feel anything at all for each other except hatred, huh? I have other shit to deal with I don't need you right now!"

Helena was thrown back by this considering she doesn't think she and JJ had ever been this honest with each other. No matter how much it hurt, she knew she needed to hear this. She didn't deserve JJ and she knew it, but it sucked to here.

"JJ--"

"No, you don't get to have me," JJ exclaimed, "Just go back to your prissy little friends on your side of the island and forget about me, forget about us."

"I never wanted to forget about us," the girl muttered so quietly she wasn't even sure the boy heard her. She wasn't sure if she wanted him to hear it. It felt so strangely personal to bare her soul out loud -- it was something the girl didn't think she had ever done before. As the reflection of the light flickered in the boy's eyes, she knew he had heard her words. "Call me an idiot, I don't care, I don't want this to end. I don't know why, I don't know what you did to me to make me so attached to you, but I want you, JJ. If you won't have me, that's fine, but I just wanted you to know. I'll... I'll get going."

Taking a deep breath, she forced herself to turn away from him as she headed to the door. She didn't look back to see if JJ was following her, she couldn't trust herself not to react if he didn't. As she reached for the doorknob, a hand rested on her shoulder and she breathed a sigh of relief.

"Helena, wait," JJ sighed and the girl turned around to face him. When she did, she waited for him to speak, remaining silent until she knew he was done. She could see the pain in his face and surprisingly, it hurt her to know that she had caused it, "I-I don't want this to end, either. I know I'm an idiot for that, but I don't wanna lose you. Just... don't make me have to let you go because I can't take much more of this."

She nodded and a sentence hung at the tip of her tongue that she refused to say. To her, those words felt like a manipulation, like a last ditch effort to cling onto something they couldn't afford to have. Those words have never been kind to her, so saying them, even with their true meaning, felt like a betrayal to her very self.

Instead, she settled on, "I won't, JJ. You deserve better than that."

Whatever she expected him to say, what he said was the last thing. Instead of responding to her statement, he reached past her and grabbed the doorknob, twisting it and opening the door, saying, "Goodnight, Helena."

Stepping outside into the cool night, she turned and saw the blond standing in the doorway, watching her go. She nodded, "Goodnight JJ."

The door closed behind her.

will i ever get back to the plot of the show? the world may never know! but also y'all paid the last chapter DIRT it literally got one comment if that's how y'all are gonna act i will simply never update this story again if you think I'm kidding just ask my valkyrie fic bitches