Turning my head to the sound of the window on my left, watching at the side of my bed where the window slowly creaks open, the dark night of outside slipping through the curtains that pull away when Andrew's figure comes into view, I see him coming through the small window.

His lean body came into view, sitting at the edge of the window, curtains above his sitting position, bunched up on the raised window, him glowing up along with the light brown furniture around me, the light walls of my room brighting because of him, though he scared me, and though I'm not showing it, simply had reacted with the submission of the fate of whoever could be coming through my window when the slid and creak of my window occurred, I'm actually quite pleased to see him.

"Andrew, what are you doing?" I whined.

He's still adjusting through the small space.

"How did you ever even get up there?... The only person that could do that is..." My voice went quiet as I slowly said Sally's name, turning my head away from the window. I felt guilty suddenly.

"Sally, your friend?" he questioned, cautious with his wonder, sensing the air changing around us as my eyes began to droop down and I felt a grey cloud over my head but Andrew's glow was strong against it.

"Uh hu, ya," I answered dismissively, avoiding his gaze. My gaze looking to the other side of where his body stood tall next to the window that was barely used to go up in comparison to the other, my eyes continued to drip down but I probably looked fine on the outside with my strong profile facing Andrew's gaze while I looked ahead, avoiding his gaze and my vision was staring at nothing in particular as I went blank for a moment.

I don't know if Andrew noticed my distress as I heard his voice play in the background, staring only ahead at the light brown cabinets that glowed with the fluorescent light above until Andrew's voice seeped its way through with the genuine worry in his tone.

"Are you okay?"

"Yes, I'm fine." His words not fazing me as I answered like a pro, dismissive and emotionless, he could see right through me though.

"Are you sure?" He questioned just in case, his presence laying a light shadow over me and my bed, the bed I sat on right now. The colorful covers around my legs spread out on me, it's yellow, blue and pink, flowers and sprinkling stars and happy sheets they showered out. Tissues laid, scattered around the mattress, its little white puffs a mess that surrounded my extended legs.

"Are you sure you're okay?" Andrew asked softly, his voice inquiring in suspicion and concern, popping me out of my dismissive thoughts. I could feel his presence closer, his words feeling more profound.

In decision, I slowly turned my head, my straight ahead chin changed to the side as I looked at what was over the bed where he stood while avoiding his gaze still.

The bed shifted, sinking down and changing as he sat on the side of the bed in front of me, my stubbornness prevented me to look at him straight, my gaze looking at his side where the window stood, the night glowing through the flow of the white curtains and the happy furniture in my house blurred any of my negative thoughts, but my peripheral view could see his figure on the bed, looking down at my lied down figure against the headrest.

I still didn't look at him, but he did.

I could feel his curious eyes seep through me. Looking away still though, I felt his hand gently graze my chin, a kind move that I'd normally sink into but it only caused me to move my head away in a fuss, stubbornly huffing under my breath, looking back to where I was a moment ago.

His hand flinged back down at my sudden movement but a moment after, those hands of his, warm and big, came back, cupping my chin, grazing it with his soft thumb against my soft skin. So softly and sweetly, those fingers of his gently caressed my profile, calming me down slowly, I was slowly giving into his touch.
And then as my eyes closed, his grazes ended as both his hands cupped my cheeks, filling them up with his warmth, though it was warm in my room, everything was more sunny and pleasant and his firm, kind, grip pulled my face to face his.

Weakly, my eyes blinked and finally I looked him in the eyes.

His eyes were full of wonder, deep brown, light brown bouncing into the mix, his interior green piercing so subtlety, so beautiful I felt like gasping, I almost felt reborn, more alive as my eyes widened by such a surprise in proximity. Those eyes were searching something in my eyes as I stayed silent, we simply observed each other.

He looked down at my lips which suddenly parted as he looked back at my eyes, my insides hitching, awaiting for what he'd do.

Wondering, hopeful yet acting unfazed, I looked into his eyes that were back to mine, waiting before those eyes crinkled up and he smiled, it forming on his beautiful lit up face.

"You're truly beautiful, Nina,"

I couldn't help but smile as I blushed irresistibly.

But then, the warmth of my possibly tinted cheeks turned away as I shook my head, the feeling demolishing, looking away from him.

How could he think I was beautiful in this state?

My hair was in a messy bun as its brown wild tips fell out and matted around my face, my eyes probably were with bags underneath them, eyes glistening with past tears, red and dark and tired, and to top it off, I was dressed like a slob.

Last time I checked, men only liked women in slutty clothes.

As if Andrew could read my mind, his hand reached up to cup my cheeks once more, causing my gaze to look back to his. The turn of my head occurred and I felt lost in his warm, kind gaze.

"Don't listen to those thoughts, you are beautiful." His eyes widened with a pout to his lips, looking right through me to make sure I understood. And for a moment I believed him, I believed it as my heart felt to fill up with such hope and love but that feeling loosened up as it went back to its closed up beliefs. - How could I be beautiful? Plus, I'm on my period. What's beautiful about that?

I sighed and looked away again, saddened, tired, by such thoughts.

As if Andrew was giving up, he got off the bed which surprised me a bit, the emptiness of the bed soon filled me with confusion as Andrew stood up.

My head turned to his in worry and question, but all he did was smile down at me, his lean body hovering over the bed as he stood where he started.

As I observed him, tilting my head, I watched as he easefully sat onto the bed again, watching me with his soft smile underneath his peach skin cheeks. Pulling the covers that are on top of me and snuggling in with, pulling the colors onto him and filling him up with more colors, he seemed happy with such a move as he childishly grinned at me, scotching his whole lengthened body closer to me. 

Underneath the covers now, his head peeking out from underneath the thick blanket top, his smile glowed with such ease, he looked so cute, close to me, kind to me, with me, he made me feel good and during this time of trouble.

Looking at him, in astonishment, a small smile creeped up on my lips but they stayed controlled, simply observing him in quiet awe before his head laid on my shoulder, his brown hair tickling my exposed neck.

I was confused:

Such a move caused my heart beat to sink into my chest, hollowing out my insides as I felt my eyes widening. I didn't know what to do, but my warm shivers of pleasure traveled up my neck where his brown hair sat along with his face, BeAutiful face!

I didn't know how to act.

I looked down then at him, trying not to bother him by the movement of my head that caused his hair peeking out to massage the bottom of my chin following with another shiver that went unnoticed.

My head snapped back in front, my observation of his hair, his profile, his shoulder and neck that tilted to my side as his head laid so comfortably on mine that I almost didn't mind, both of us comfy against the dark brown backboard of my bed, a thought popped in my head, stopping my gaze - Shit, I'm on my period.- it reminded me.

"Uh, maybe you, uh, you.. shouldn't sit on my bed," I hesitated, gulping out my words in sudden fear.

"You're right," Andrew agreed, his head leaving my now empty shoulder. Getting off as I responded surprised, looking down at him with creased eyebrows, "That's why I'm lying down," he told me. My eyebrows still knitted in confusion, his smirky smile began to creep up his cheeks as I realized what he was talking about, my forehead relaxing.

I smiled back in amusement, turning my head away as I shook my head, my laughter followed unhesitant and with no thought to it, my small pain that ached in my stomach untightened around me and the dark clouds that I had created were slowly blowing away, Andrew's glow bounced through every corner of my room, my house, my heart.

My laugh continued and I felt better, and my irritation towards my reluctant thoughts, that were always so common and natural that I felt that no matter how much work I put into being positive everything went collapsing in a second, but having someone like Andrew helped with the work I had improved on. It's crazy how much work you put into being happy, how much things have gotten better and then the bad days still come out and tell you that all that work is forgotten, it annoys me, will anything ever get better?

Now, sitting on my bed, calmly accepting these feelings and thoughts with a laugh and with Andrew beside me, I slowly realize that this is the part of learning and growing.