Edward Dace.

14. August.
Saturday, 9:00 am.
San Lorenzo Park.

SIGURADO NA AKONG MAY KAMALASANG DALA sina Kuya PolSci at Kuya Psyche, na hanggang ngayon ay hindi ko pa rin alam ang pangalan.

Kahapon, noong kasama ko sila sa library sa uni, na-suspend kami. Kanina, dahil sa ingay na nagawa namin (at dahil sa avalanche ng mga libro na hiniram ni Kuya Psyche) ay muntikan na kaming ma-ban mula sa public library ng San Lorenzo, kung hindi lang napakiusapan ni Kuya Psyche at Macey 'yong librarian.

Ngayon, ewan ko na lang kung mapalayas pa kami sa park na 'to.

May mga batang naglalaro sa paligid, kasama ang mga magulang nila. May mga nagtitinda ng pagkain at may mga naglalakad-lakad lang. Maraming tao, kahit Sabado ng umaga lang.

Kaming tatlo naman nina Kuya Psyche at Kuya PolSci ay nagsisiksikan sa nag-iisang park bench na hindi okupado. Hindi sana kami magsisiksikan kung hindi pinaupo ni Kuya Psyche sa tabi namin 'yong isang matandang babae na nagbabantay sa mga apo n'yang naglalaro.

Hindi ko talaga alam kung bakit namemeste pa rin silang dalawa sa 'kin.

Si Macey, nagpaiwan sa library dahil kikitain daw si Adrian. Tutal daw, may kasama na akong "mga kaibigan", kaya kahit hindi na n'ya 'ko samahan ay okay lang.

"Naka-connect ba sa internet ang laptop mo?" tanong ni Kuya Psyche kahit halata naman na nasa website pa rin ako ng Literature Club.

"Yep," sagot ko, "at hindi ako nagpapahiram ng laptop. Kahit lumuhod ka sa harap ko."

Nalungkot si Kuya Psyche. Si Kuya PolSci, ang aming butihing reyna, ay nagsabi ng, "And what is your plan with that "virus" on your laptop?" He gestured air quotes at the word virus.

I squinted my eyes at him and grimaced. "Aalisin ko."

"Good luck."

His good luck was a bloody jinx.

For almost two hours, I'd been trying to remove the pop-ups and the unnecessary notifications from the Literature Club's website. Now that I've heard PolSci dude's luckless "Good luck", I realised that the pop-ups and the whole shebang was done on purpose.

I glared at PolSci dude, then took a deep breath. Tinitigan ko muna ang mga pop-up na pumupuno sa screen ko.

QUICK SURVEY!
QUICK SURVEY!
QUICK SURVEY!

"Sige, papatulan kita," bulong ko sa punyetang pop-up at pinagnilayan sandali ang Take the Survey! button.

Click.

KLEENEX, LUXE, OR PAPYRUS?

"WHAT THE HE—no, no, calm down. Okay, I'm calm, I'm calm." I took a deep breath and smiled at the survey. This is just a normal survey, Edward Dace, of course they'd be advertising their tissue pape—a what? A tissue paper...?

"Tissue Paper of Destiny?" Psyche dude queried, reading the survey. "Gawa saan ang tissue ng KFC?"

Tinaasan ko s'ya ng kilay. "Bakit?"

"Hindi... Hindi ba 'yan ang next clue para sa 'yo?"

"Ha?"

PolSci dude leant forward to read the survey clearly. "Somebody left you three tissue papers as a clue, hacked your accounts, and led you to this pathetic survey. Of course, all of that would be connected to the sender of these tissue papers of destiny."

"First of all," I said, "bakit nakikitawag kayo ng Tissue Paper of Destiny? Second, bakit ba nandito pa kayo? Hindi ba dapat sinusundan n'yo rin ang clues na ibinigay sa inyo?"

"Naisip ko na matalino ka kaya baka mas mapapadali ang pagso-solve ko sa clues ko kung sasama ako sa 'yo," sagot ni Kuya Psyche.

"Good." Mataas ang tingin n'ya sa 'kin. Hindi ko s'ya palalayasin. I turned to PolSci dude. "And you. Isn't it time for your shooting?"

"I figured you need my help." In a snap, a narcissistic smirk was etched on his face.

"I'm sorry, the birthday party was on the second street. We don't need a fucking clown here."

"And do you have any idea what to do with that "survey"?"

"Hayaan na lang natin s'ya dito," pakiusap ni Kuya Psyche sa 'kin. "Hindi naman siguro s'ya ganoon ka-salbahe."

I shrugged. "Right, whatever. Igu-Google ko muna kung saan gawa ang tissue ng KFC."

"Wrong," sabat na naman ni Kuya PolSci. Ni hindi s'ya nakatingin sa screen. Nanonood s'ya ng mga batang naglalaro habang umiinom ng de-latang kape.

"Pa'no mo nasabing mali?" tanong ni Kuya Psyche.

PolSci dude sighed and gave his coffee a very fond look. "If what you're answering right now is the second level of this Tissue Paper of Destiny farce, then that surely is a question that'll test your intelligence and reasoning."

"Well this whole thing is testing my patience," I muttered.

"That survey is screaming the question "are you really worthy?" all over it. You need to think it through."

"Am I not thinking it through?"

"You easily listened to his suggestion." He jerked his head towards Psyche dude's direction. "You didn't think it through."

"Right." I exhaled loudly through my nose. "So if this is to test my reasoning, ano'ng dapat kong piliin?"

"Simple."

"Ginagawa mong kumplikado tapos sasabihin mo ngayong hinayupak ka, simple?"

"It's an odd one out, idiot."

I chose to be silent to think. Both of them seemed to be deep in their thoughts too, so I was finally in peace.

Kleenex, Luxe, or Papyrus?

Kleenex was the very first brand of tissue paper, Luxe was a brand of tissue paper, and Papyrus was the very first paper. If this was odd one out then the answer must be either Papyrus or Luxe. Papyrus was odd because it was the only paper, and Luxe was odd because it was the only one that wasn't a first.

The answer is Kleenex.

It's the only not-odd one. The rest were odd, therefore the only one that wasn't odd was the odd one out.

"Kleenex?" I said, and turned to PolSci dude for confirmation.

He grinned. "Are you asking me?"

"Kleenex." Pinili ko kaagad ang Kleenex mula sa survey at hindi na naghintay pa ng pangungutya mula kay Kuya PolSci.

Another pop-up appeared.

WHERE DO YOU INTEND TO GO?

ASGARD
KALUWALHATIAN
OLYMPUS

"Why isn't there a Hell in the choices?" PolSci dude asked.

"Baka raw kasi makasama na naman kita, mapalayas pa ulit ako."

"Pero saan mo ba gustong pumunta ngayon?" tanong ni Kuya Psyche.

"I want to go home." I then chuckled. "Malamang ang sagot dito ay Asgard. Norse Mythology ang trip ng mga hinayupak na may pakana ng Tissue Paper of Destiny."

"Wrong," muling pagsabat ni Kuya PolSci.

"Dude." Gusto kong burahin ang ngisi sa mukha n'ya, gamit ang kamay ko at ang isang upuan. "Kung mali ako, ano'ng sagot?"

"You said it yourself."

"I said I want to go home, pero wala naman sa choices ang "Home". Nakikita mo ba sa choices, drama queen?"

"Where do you intend to go...?" pag-ulit ni Kuya Psyche sa tanong sa survey. "Tinanong ka kung saan mo gustong magpunta, pero nagbigay sila ng choices. In a way, parang wala kang choice, dahil mapipilitan kang piliin kung anong ipinipilit nilang piliin mo."

Kahit sa survey nagpapaalila ako? No way.

"Pero parang gano'n na din ang nangyayari," dagdag ni Kuya Psyche. Mababansagan ko na s'yang Madam Rosa, isang beses pang basahin n'ya ang nasa isip ko.

"Subukan ko kayang i-type ang salitang home?" I hovered my fingers above the letters h-o-m-e.

"No that won't work," panirang sabat ni Kuya PolSci. "That survey is testing your wits and reasoning. If you're going to answer within the choices, then your answer to the question "are you really worthy?" will be: yes, I am worthy, but I am an idiot that could be controlled by you."

"Duuudes. Hindi pa ba ako nako-kontrol ng survey na 'to? Suko na po ako, pramis. Gustong-gusto ko nang umuwi."

"You know there's a way out," sabi ni Kuya PolSci at hinilig sa gawi n'ya ang laptop ko. "You said you want to go home," itinapat n'ya ang laptop cursor sa Homepage ng Literature Club website, "and here's the option, Home."

He clicked the homepage button and my laptop's entire screen blacked out.

Psyche dude and I panicked.

"Gago, anong ginawa mo?!" I kicked PolSci dude's shoe. Psyche dude was nervously biting his lower lip, giving the PolSci student his most thoughtful stare.

Magagantihan pa sana ako ni Kuya PolSci sa paninipa ko sa kanya kung hindi lang tumunog ang isang notification mula sa laptop ko. Nasa homepage pa rin kami ng Literature Club, pero may isang bagong post na lumabas, na mukhang number code:

16 1:21:7:21:19:20 15:00

Napanganga ako. Sino ang nag-post nito? Wala 'to kanina, bakit biglang may ganito? Kasama ba 'to sa pakana ng nangti-trip sa 'min? Anong ibig sabihin nito? Anong gagawin ko rito?

I glanced at Psyche dude. He's just as puzzled as I am. I glanced at PolSci dude. He's staring at the code as if it was a birthday surprise. Then, the fucking drama queen laughed and stood.

"That's about it, then." He finished his coffee and looked around for a trash can. Finding none, he just turned to us and said, "Bye."

"Oi, saan ka pupunta?" I demanded. "Anong ibig sabihin nito?"

"It's a code that could be solved even by preschoolers. Have fun." He started walking back to the university campus. You know, like an asshole.

"Iniwan na tayo," sabi ni Kuya Psyche. Malungkot n'yang tinitigan ang code sa website ng Literature Club.

"You know what, fuck it." I crossed my arms. "Wala na akong paki."

"Pwede... Pwedeng maki-check ng website ng CAS?"

"Wala ka bang phone?" Bigla akong nakonsensya sa tanong ko sa kanya nang makita ko ang phone na gamit n'ya. Sinaunang Nokia yata. Kaagad n'yang tinago.

Now because I'm a generous man, I lent him my laptop. Of course, after changing the account settings and locking all personal files.

"Bibili lang ako ng makakain," sabi ko at tumayo.

Tumango si Kuya Psyche. "Hindi ko itatakbo ang laptop mo."

I shrugged. "Meh, I don't care that much." Hindi ko nga alam kung marunong kang gumamit ng laptop.

"Marunong naman akong gumamit ng laptop," sabi n'ya, habang mabagal na nagta-type. Tapos bigla s'yang natigilan. "Teka lang—"

Bolang crystal yata ang dapat na ibinigay ko sa kanya.

"Bakit?" tanong ko at sumilip sa ginagawa n'ya.

"May... May lumabas sa screen—"

Kukutyain ko sana s'ya at sasabihing, "Google Chrome ang tawag d'yan." pero napukaw ng lumabas sa screen ang atensyon ko. Sa homepage ng College of Arts and Sciences ay may kakaibang picture na naka-post.

"Sigurado kang hindi 'yan activity ng department n'yo?" tanong ko ulit. Nakikilala ko ang ilan sa mga characters at glyphs. "Paano ka napunta r'yan? Saan galing 'yan?"

"Nag-log in ako sa account ko, titingnan ko sana kung may updates sa scholarship... tapos biglang nagblangko 'yong screen, kagaya ng nangyari sa 'yo kanina."

"May lumabas din bang survey?" Naupo akong muli at tinitigan ang picture.

"Walang survey."

"Hindi ka pinag-trip-an?"

"Hindi."

"Gagong mga nangti-trip."

Bumuntonghininga s'ya at kinopya sa notebook n'ya ang mga nakalagay sa picture. An attempt was made. "Tingin ko," sabi n'ya, "kailangan kong pumunta sa isang computer shop para masagot 'to."

Isinauli na n'ya ang laptop ko. Ramdam ko ang sama ng loob n'ya. Tutulungan ko sana s'ya sa cipher, pero naisip ko na ako nga, may code na hindi ko na sasagutan. Damay-damay na 'to, Kuya Psyche.

"Bye, dude."

15. August.
Sunday, 6:30 pm.
Coronado University Male's Dorm.
372A High Street.

LET ME DO THE GOOD-BAD RECOUNT HERE.

Lunes bukas pero hindi ko kailangang pumasok. That's good.

Linggo ngayon at nasa dorm lang ako. That's also good.

Nasa harap ko ang laptop ko at may orange juice ako sa kaliwa ko. That's really good.

Naka-on ang laptop ko pero hindi ko na ma-access ang accounts ko. This is bad, this is really bad.

Dude!

I fumed and glared at my laptop. If the people behind the Tissue Paper of Destiny were these oh-so-powerful bastards, why target me? The drama queen was not that near from impossible to be targeted in these kinds of farce.

"BUT WHY ME?! WHY NOT CHOOSE SOMEBODY ELSE?" I yelled at my laptop screen, which has been displaying the same window of my error. Then the screen blacked out (I almost thought it was my fault), and a number code appeared.

16 1:21:7:21:19:20 15:00

No, no, no, nope.

"I've had enough of you, Tissue Paper of Destiny. I'm done, I'm a hundred percent done."

I turned my laptop off and let out a small, borderline insane laugh.

But then, for heaven's sake, it turned back on and displayed a message on a pop-up window:

You can't solve the code? Pft.

For a hacker you are one cheeky motherfucker and clearly an annoying one. I closed the window, but another one appeared:

The not-so-great Edward Dace freaking out because of a number code? How pathetic!

"Nope, I'm calm." I forced a smile at the window. "Tigilan n'yo na ako bago ako gumanti sa inyo."

Just how stubborn can you get, Edward Dace?

"I'm calm, alright." I closed the windows again, and wasn't surprised to see another one annoyingly pop up.

Your time is running, Edward Dace.

"Time is always running!" I yelled at the window. "And I am an Edward Dace, I will fucking rent a taxi to chase that!"

I closed the window, but got flooded with the same message of my time running out. I was determined to close them all, and succeeded after several clicks. I got a few seconds to breathe, until one pop-up message took the cake.

I have your accounts, gosh. If you can't solve the code you can say cheerios to them. Oh, and just a tip: Don't create an unpublished diary with all your untold feelings in it. It's absolutely cringe-y.

"FUCK YOU AND ALL OF YOUR ANCESTORS!" I yelled, then closed my laptop lid, removed the battery, threw it on my bed, and sat back laughing.

Ha.

Hahaha.

HAHAHAHA!

I broke into peals of laughter then fell on my knees. I started begging in front of my laptop, "Ilang taon tayong nagsama, laptop. Pinangalanan kita at pinangalagaan. Ito ang igaganti mo sa 'kin?"

It took me a few minutes to internalise everything I've said and to regain composure. I quickly sat up straight and slapped my face with both of my hands. I turned my laptop back on, and stared at the code.

Those are just numbers, Edward Dace, and you're the god of languages. Numbers are the words of Maths. It is the language of Maths.

Number is the universal language.

16 1:21:7:21:19:20 15:00

This is a very easy code, as what PolSci dude said. I've seen this somewhere too. I think this included a clock or something, because a colon was used to separate each number.

Kung uunahin ko ang 1:21:7:21:19:20, at gagamitin ko ang clock cipher, ang kalalabasan nito ay...

B:V:H:V:T:U.

Okay, nice.

Wala akong na-gets.

Let's try using Caesar's Cipher, where the letters rotate by 13.

OIUIGH.

Perkele, wala pa rin akong ma-gets.

Ano bang alam ko sa codes at ciphers, I'm an Edward Dace, I deal with letters, not numbers!

Letters.

Yeah, letters.

"PERKELE!" I stood up and stomped my foot. Then I heard a student from the room above causing a loud thump.

Baka nahulog s'ya mula sa kama n'ya o baka simpleng tanga lang s'ya. Sigurado akong simple lang s'yang tanga.

Simpleng tanga...

Teka...

"Simpleng tanga, oo!" I jumped and immediately took a pen and a paper from my drawer, scribbling down the equivalent letters of the 1:21:7:21:19:20, using the simplest and most basic code of all time—the A1Z26 Cipher.

Now I have 16. A:U:G:U:S:T. 15:00.

"FANCULO! FINALLY!" I jogged excitedly on my place. "FINALLY SOMETHING MADE SENSE!"

Knock, knock, knock.

Napatigil ako at siningkitan ng mata ang pinto. May nakarinig ba sa 'kin? Masyado ba akong maingay? Pagsasabihan ba nila ako? Security guard ba ang kumakatok? Kinakatok na ba ako ng may pakana ng Tissue Paper of Destiny?

Dahan-dahan akong lumapit sa pinto at hinawakan ang door knob. Kumatok muli ang hinayupak. Dahan-dahan ko ring binuksan.

"Hi," bati ni Kuya PolSci.

"Hanggang dito ba naman susundan mo ako, gago ka?" I slammed the door at his face. He managed to squeeze a foot inside before I could shut the door completely.

"M-May itatanong lang sana ako?" Si Kuya Psyche. Bitbit pala ni Kuya Polsci.

"I saw him loitering outside my room," paliwanag ni Kuya PolSci. "Then we heard you and your little theatrics." He chuckled and did a very bad imitation of me saying: "But why me? Why not choose somebody else?"

Bago pa ako makapalag ay hinawakan ako sa balikat ni Kuya Psyche. "Kailangan ko talaga ang tulong mo sa code na nakuha ko."

••• GODSFORRENT •••

THE THREE OF US sat on the floor, brainstorming, and I could barely keep my sanity on. Psyche dude laid down his notes and his copy of the cipher he got from the CAS website, on the floor in the middle of us. We looked like three guys starting a cult.

"Sinubukan kong hanapin isa-isa ang bawat character na nakasulat," simula ni Kuya Psyche, "at wala pa akong nakukuhang sagot, maliban sa alibata—"

"Baybayin," I corrected.

"Baybayin. Hiragana, at sa letter M, P, at O. Meron na ako ngayong M, P, O, NA, KO, at NI."

"I think Elder Futhark and Egyptian Hieroglyphs are involved here. Though, bago kita tulungan," sabi ko habang tinititigan ang cipher ni Kuya Psyche, "bakit nandito ka pa?"

"Ako?" tanong ni Kuya Psyche.

"Hindi ikaw, s'ya." I pointed at PolSci dude. "Ano bang pangalan mo?" I decided to ask in irritation.

"I don't trust you with my name. You might be an elf in disguise." PolSci dude nonchalantly stared at the cipher.

"Then give me whatever name I could call you dahil Kuya PolSci lang ang tawag ko sa 'yo sa utak ko at naaawa na ako sa mga Political Science students dahil nawawalan na ako ng respeto sa course nila, dahil sa 'yo."

"Call me Joyeuse," he said and smirked. "A weapon's name sounds powerful."

"Yeah, except you're a bloody drama queen." I turned to Psyche dude. "What about you?"

Psyche dude raised both of his hands and nervously answered, his eyes cutting from my table, the ciphers, then the floor, "Uh, Futhark?"

I nodded. "So. Joyeuse and Futhark, huh. Then I'm—"

"Edward Dace," they chorused.

My eyes widened. "Pa'no n'yo nalaman?"

Joyeuse, the PolSci dude and the drama queen, scoffed and imitated me once again, "Time is always running! And I am an Edward Dace, I will fucking rent a taxi to chase that!"

Ganoon ba talaga kalakas ang boses ko?

I sighed and shook the question off. "You forgot to add, The Great Edward Dace."