warning; homophobia, homophobic slurs

"There's some uh... rumours going around about you..."

It was disappointing... to say the least. The way someone would go that far when they didn't get what they wanted. The way someone would try and go out of their way to spread such malicious information with every intention of hurting someone else. Fukunaga told you what he had heard among the second years that had coincidentally gone over and around your ears. Even Kenma was confused and wondering why he had never noticed anything like that happening until he began to reluctantly connect the dots as his sharp, golden eyes were on you and only you.

"There are... some students saying things like you're gay and... it kinda escalated from there.."

Watching your reaction, the curiosity and nonchalance until Fukunaga told you amongst his teammates, watching how your idle interest turned to a frown and the way your pretty eyes turned nervous and hurt. Kenma reached out to you when your shoulders dropped as if in defeat. It didn't even look like you were breathing, bare in the face and showing no sign of even feeling your boyfriend right next to you.

Fukunaga hesitated to go on, unsure of how much he should say for the sake of not wanting to hurt you more than you had already possibly been hurt.

"They were even saying things like you're a woman-hater and... and that you and K-Kenma are..."

It was hard to think when the words rang through your mind. It was hard to see when rage was building within your chest. It was humiliating when your friends were watching you with those sad looks as if they felt sorry for you. Kenma's hand grasped onto the hem of your sweater but you turned and tried to storm off to try and think more clearly.

They were saying you were gay? What the hell was up with that. This is modern Japan, why the hell did other people have to have a say about that. Why did people feel like they should bring you down and ostracise you just because you weren't attracted to women? What the hell was wrong with you liking cute boys with partially dyed blonde hair and striking gold, cat-like eyes? What, so boobs and big, round asses didn't appeal to you, and? Who's fucking business was that. Why were you weird for something as trivial as that? Why couldn't the people you go to school with just ignore things that didn't even concern them? Why did liking boys make you a freak?

"he always looks at boys so weirdly!"

"be careful or he'll think gross things about you!"

"What a freak!"

You had barely registered that you hadn't even managed to walk a few steps when you felt your collar lightly pressing against your neck. Turning your sights behind you, Kenma was the target of your cold glare and he frowned further when you didn't stop glaring at him, as if suddenly it was only you, by yourself, against everyone else in the world. He didn't let go of your sweater in fear that you would try to run away from him.

"Hey. Don't run from me."

His face was sad, you turned away from it.

"[Name], we're all here for you," Kuroo spoke loud from the doors of the gym, "no one is going to look at you differently because of something like your sexuality." His words held something strong and intense that you couldn't look at. Glaring at the ground, you merely answered with a huff as he added, "even if the rumours are true or not."

"Whatever."

Your voice was harsh and your reactions towards Kenma were cold and distrusting, almost like a stray, abandoned cat that distrusted humans. But Kenma knew that it wasn't towards him because he knew what was going through your mind and he knew that you would do anything to not have this happen again. So, he had to make sure you knew that he was right there with you. Always with you.

"[Name], hey, we'll get through this, don't run. Not from me."

"I've never met someone like that before!"

With something akin to a growl and a grunt, you whipped your arm around from the boy so that he no longer had a hold on you.

"This isn't fair!" Roaring, your voice cracked from the sudden force of your yell, loud and pained enough to make Kenma flinch back slightly.

He masked his shock and stay still before you, maybe because he knew that if he tried to approach you again, you'd push him away, "Oi, come on," Kenma spoke gently and quietly, kind of how he whispered to you moments before you'd fall asleep when the two of you had sleepovers. When he'd admit that you meant everything to him. When he'd quietly murmur to you to roll over so he could cuddle your back and run his skinny fingers over your firm chest and stomach. When his voice became tender and hushed, telling you to go to sleep when you would try to make him stop playing his Nintendo so late at night,

"I know it hurts, I know it's hard but you're the strongest and happiest boy I know,"

He continued, "Let's figure this out together, okay? It's just rumou-"

"..and that you and K-Kenma are..."

you and K-Kenma

Kenma

"Together?!" You snapped, spitting it out like a question as if you were genuinely asking but Kenma remained silent, trying to decipher what was going through your mind and yet also knowing what you were thinking as well.

"This, this i-isn't together! Kenma!" It sounded like the words were cutting at the walls of your throat.

He wanted to ask what you meant.

"They were talking about you! I-I... this is all my fault!"

And Kenma... something in his chest cracked from the way your frazzled hands raised to grip at your short, dark hair. You pulled and let go, face contorted from the pain in your scalp and in your heart, he didn't understand what you meant, though. At least not entirely. And the way you said it scared him. It looked like you were battling with your mind, unable to think through the dark forest in your head but seconds passed and you gripped his shoulders, it happened so fast that he almost didn't realise it, "I-... I have to..."

"Wait, [Name]!"

He didn't get to say anything more before you had sprinted off, determined to not get caught this time.

Kuroo approached Kenma, as did Taketora, Fukunaga and Morisuke and while Kuroo laid a single hand on his friend's shoulder, Taketora was glaring at the spot that you had just been occupying, not angered at the boy, but at the situation that had just been dropped on you. How you pulled away from Kenma and the others like you really didn't have anyone but yourself.

"He cares about you more than anyone, we can all see that." The ace broke the silence and continued, "And he's strong so maybe he just needs to settle this himself... but he'll come back to ya."

Because no one could deny the chemistry between Kenma and yourself. Kenma's frown deepened because he knew that but he thought you would let him be there for you.

Kuroo squeezed Kenma's shoulder, the reassurance a bit more meaningful and knowing than his teammates' verbal encouragement.

"You know... you look at him a lot."

You glanced away from Kenma to see your friend also looking at him, and then to you. Kenma had been standing with Kuroo, the taller boy holding a volleyball as he spoke to the smaller boy and by the look on Kuroo's face, you could tell he had been whining about something. The look of stubborn annoyance on Kenma's face was amusing, you found that you didn't want to look away from it.

"Yeah, they're my friends.." you replied because it was obvious, "we're pretty close."

You knew your friend knew that because you had been placed in a different class than Kenma and Kuroo was in the year above you. So while Kenma and yourself were separated, you had made some friends of your own in your class, "I meant-"

"But you're like alwa~ys looking at him, that smaller guy!" Another friend nudged you obnoxiously and you tried to dodge it, raising a brow, "It's whatever, man, we're just good friends."

For some reason, panic flared in your chest for a second before the topic was no longer about you and instead about the new volume of your friend's favourite manga that had been released.

"Why do you always look at him like that?"

Weeks later, you felt a dreading sense of deja vu and snapped your gaze to your friend. Again, Kenma had been hanging with Kuroo but before that, the three of you had been chatting for a bit. You could see that Kenma tended to get pretty shy when he had to talk to someone he didn't know so the buddies from your class stayed just like that, buddies from your class.

"Huh?"

You questioned nonchalantly, unaware of what he may have been thinking.

"You and that dude, Kenma? You're always looking at him but you always look like.." He trailed off, awkwardly, his face twisting into something that made you slightly defensive, like he was annoyed.

"Like you have a crush on him!" Your other friend cut in and fake gagged right before laughing like a hyena that made the whole group shake into laughter. You joined in, "No way, dude!" Your hands shaking, clammy, behind your back.

The siren rang, Kenma walked back to his class after bidding you a soft goodbye with a sweet smile,

"Dude, are you sure you're not like... gay?"

They had been acting rowdy in class, messing around and talking about anime. One of them had caught the small yet tender smile on your face, his own twisting to mild disgust. It seemed like your affections for your best friend were deeper than you had realised. And you figured, what harm could it do?

"Uhm, yeah... actually, kind of..."

Hesitant, your voice lowered and you raised a shaky hand to the back of your neck, rubbing at the heated skin and at the buzzed hair as you dragged your hand up and over your head.

"What!? For real!?"

You expected the shock, it brought a crooked smile to your face as you nodded a bit more confidently.

"You're seriously a fag?"

Your face dropped.

"That's so gross!"

"I-wai-" Raising a tentative hand as if to defend yourself from their verbal onslaught, you tried to lean closer in order to make sure it stayed between the four of you. Nobody else really had to know, but you figured it would be okay if only they knew.

"Ew, freak, are you trying to kiss me?!"

"Back up!"

"You better not have been thinking that disgusting shit about me!"

You didn't get it, "What? No, I-"

They didn't listen. They kept going, louder and louder until everyone in class heard. Until the boys actively distanced themselves and the girls looked at you like you were some wild animal in a zoo enclosure. They teased you for liking boys, they mockingly flirted with you to make everyone laugh and they told you to just be straight, stop being dumb and just be straight, stop liking boys and just like girls, it was that simple. Stop being a freak.

"Mum..."

She hummed and paused eating to see that you had barely had a bite, furrowing her brows when you hadn't even tasted the Hamburg steak, "what's wrong?"

Their words flashed through your mind endlessly, echoing like a great, big warning telling you to stop and be quiet, lest it happen in your own home, too.

You wanted to believe in your mum, though.

"I... I like Kenma."

You could've choked on the air you breathed from the thick sensation in the back of your throat that held you frozen and terrified. Your mum was very familiar with Kenma, the three of you; Kuroo, Kenma and yourself, had gone to each other's houses so many times that it was simply a comfortable routine by now. The grip on your chopsticks tightened tenfold, the utensils absolutely trembling in your grip. And it felt like you were starting to lose your breath, like you had exhaled your last breath with that single confession and could no longer inhale. Your eyes didn't move from the steak right below your nose, heart thumping unbelievably loud in your ears.

"Hey..." murmuring, you caught sight of a girl, staring to ensure she was who you thought she was.

And lo and behold, it was her. Those wide eyes and that cute, little smile may have worked on your classmates but you just weren't drawn in by that kind of cuteness. You could recognise that face anywhere, the way it burned through your memories and let you clearly see the true instigator here. Of course. It was so obvious. It had to be her.

"HEY!"