Hero: alright let's give ourselves codenames, I'll be Eagle #1

Hero: Aaron will be (regrettably) Been There Done That

Aaron: nice

Hero: Noah will be Currently Doing That

Noah: <:

Hero: Peter will be It Happened Once In A Dream

Peter: oddly disturbed but intrigued

Hero: Dianne would be If I Had To Pick A Chick

Dianne: aye

Hero: and Steve will be...

Steve: I swear to god, please

Hero: Eagle #2

Steve: tHANK YOU

-

Hero: *turns on lamp to read a book*

Noah: you know you can call me that lamp

Hero: why

Noah: because you turn me on

Hero: *shuts book aggressively*

-

Noah: Helena, Hugo, you've met Hero, these are his friends Peter and Dianne

Hero: yeap, that's Helena and there's Hugo

Dianne: *stares at Helena* so you're the one who crushed on Noah for a bit right

Helena: for fuck's sake it was a phase

Dianne: right

.

Hugo: sup- yo are those light up sneakers

Peter: totally bro

Hugo: yoooooo that's fucking dope

.

Helena: fuck you, have you ever had a crush on hero???

Dianne: thought of him once or twice but come on, everyone has a crush on him, he's like the twink of the group

Hero: excuse me-

Helena: hAH SO YOU CANT BLAME ME YOU HYPOCRITE

Dianne: at least I wasn't thirsting after spider cOCK

Noah: h-holy shit-

Helena: fUCK YOU, NASTY THOT

Dianne: dESPERATE HOE

.

Peter: and then I hammered nails onto his bat because like, come on dude, twisted nails make every bat cooler

Hugo: totally bro

Peter: want to see my ledger? I made one of every dude we beat up, and doodled every detail too

Hugo: seriously? you should see my box of severed limbs from every dude Noah fucking wrecked

Peter: we have the best bros ever

Hugo: best bros, good boys

Peter: aye give it here *offers fist bump*

Hugo: aye *fist bumps back*

.

Hero: so

Noah: um

Hero: never knew Dianne had it in her to call someone a-

Dianne: NOODLE HAIRED CRUSTY ASS CRACKER

Hero: yup

Noah: I mean, helena's usually calm and collected but she snaps here and there

Noah: just,,

Noah: never this bad

Hero: mm

Noah: and now Hugo and Peter are bonding over having-

Hero: 'the sickest bros to ever bro'

Noah: yeah

Hero:

Noah:

Hero: so

Noah:

Hero: want to head upstairs and fuck so loud the girls will stop shouting

Noah: all day, everyday babe