as more time goes on
and the more that i see
calculated chaos
is what i seem to be

bright new beginnings
but i still crash and burn
i fall two steps behind
with every lesson i learn

it's slipping like water
from my two shaking hands
people i've always known
i suddenly can't understand

they tell me i'm uptight
yet still too wild and crass
and the memories blur
under my looking glass

i'll enter this world
with exhilaration and fear
without a clue of what to let go of
and what to hold near