Chapter 20: It's a nightmare, I want to wake up

Opening his eyes the next day, Seokjin didn't immediately recognize where he was. Firstly because his vision was slightly blurred and then because he was unable to stand up. He quickly realized that he was in a room bathed in daylight, in a bed, which meant that he was not at home, but also that two sleeping people were holding him tightly on each side.

He smiled recognizing Taehyung and Namjoon but quickly closed his eyes realizing how much his head hurt and he felt nauseous. He winced in pain as he felt the pain become more acute and another heave in his stomach.

"You're awake?"  Taehyung's hoarse voice asked. 

"I'm awake but-" Seokjin began before being interrupted by a retch that made him put a hand over his mouth.

He understood what was going to happen and forcibly separated himself from the two brothers. He barely had time to get up before he doubled over and vomited the contents of his stomach, most of it bile since he hadn't eaten anything for...how long, anyway?

"Wh- what's happening to me," he muttered panting, wiping his mouth.

"You're hungover," Taehyung told him wrinkling his nose because of the unpleasant smell. He grabbed a pitcher of water from the bedside table and a glass, and filled it before handing it to Seokjin. "Here, if you want things to get better, start by drinking this."

Thirsty, Seokjin gratefully grabbed the glass of water and downed it in one gulp, even though the water tasted like vomit.

"Do you want more?"

"Yes please," Seokjin said handing him the glass of water, "but tell me, what is a hangover?"

Silently, Taehyung poured him some more water and watched him drink, realizing that Seokjin didn't remember what happened. He didn't know whether to tell him what had happened or wait for him to remember, but he didn't have the time to decide between these two possibilities.

"This is what happens when you drink too much alcohol," said Namjoon, who had woken up to Seokjin throwing up but who did not get up and remained lying down.

"A-alcohol?" Seokjin repeated without understanding the connection.

"Yes, you drank a lot last night, don't you remember?"

Stunned, Seokjin shook his head before frowning as he tried to collect his thoughts.

"Wait..."

The memory of last night hit him suddenly. 

He remembered being invited to the party by Taehyung whose costume he was still wearing partly. He also remembered arguing with him over something stupid... oh yes, he had spoken friendly with Jungkook who happened to be Taehyung and Namjoon's cousin but also their enemy.

He remembered following Jungkook to play football with him after Taehyung's burst of anger. Then he had followed him into the small forest next to his house and discovered Mr. Jeon and Mrs. Kim's secret before being threatened by them and then by Jungkook...

Seokjin turned pale at that memory and abruptly turned towards Namjoon and Taehyung who were watching him intently. Namjoon sat up on his elbows to get a better look at Seokjin..

"What?" Taehyung asked, wondering which of the horrible Seokjin's memories from last night came back to him first.

Seokjin hesitated. Should he put the threats aside and tell them that their little brother's father wasn't Mr. Kim but Mr. Jeon? But then he remembered something else that overshadowed the rest and he placed a feverish hand on his sweaty forehead.

"I-I think Jungkook did something to me..." he murmured. 

"He made you smoke his shit," Taehyung growled, "and it made you lose your mind. You even started flapping your arms saying you wanted to fly away."

" What?! N-no, that's not true, you just made it up!" Seokjin cried, eyes widened.

"I'm not making this up, you just have to remember," Taehyung replied, sulking.

Seokjin turned to Namjoon to ask if Taehyung was telling the truth and Namjoon, who had been silent for several minutes, simply nodded. Embarrassed, he blushes as he actually began to have flashbacks of his childish behavior around Taehyung after Taehyung arrives to save him and...

"Tae, you hit Jungkook!" he suddenly exclaimed, scandalized.

"Is that what worries you the most?" Taehyung asked, a little annoyed. "What you consumed could have cost you your football career and Jungkook knew it!"

"Eh?" Seokjin said, "no, I don't believe it, Jungkook wouldn't have done that, he's-"

"What is he? Your friend?" Taehyung asked aggressively, "I already told you he wasn't your friend but you didn't listen to me and you did what you wanted. And that's why this happened to you, so I hope this serves as a lesson to you!"

Seokjin suddenly looked miserable and Taehyung immediately regretted losing his temper. He knew he shouldn't have gotten angry like that at Seokjin who had been Jungkook's victim but he couldn't help it: he couldn't stand that Seokjin abandoned him to stay with Jungkook last night.

Seeing that Namjoon said nothing to support him contrary to his habits, Seokjin, understood that Taehyung was right. Regretting having placed his trust in Jungkook despite Taehyung's warnings, he lowered his head and said in a small voice:

"I'm sorry, you were right, your cousin is not a good person. I won't be friends with him anymore."

"Okay, good," Taehyung appreciated.

Seokjin turned his head sulkily.

"What he made me smoke... is it what made me vomit now?" Seokjin asked, who still had stomach cramps.

"No, Namjoon told you, what gave you a hangover was the alcohol you drank. Try to remember. I told you to leave, to go wait for me in my room and you said you would go to Namjoon's," Taehyung reminded him.

"I-I remember," Seokjin said slowly, "I ran into my mom and she saw I was weird. I- I said bad things to her..."

He looked like he was about to cry, remembering what he had said to his mother even though she was just trying to warn him about Jungkook. Again, even though he expected Namjoon to comfort him, it was Taehyung who said:

"Don't worry, your mom knows you didn't mean what you said." 

"Are you sure?" Seokjin asked hopefully. 

"Yes, everyone knows that drugs turn people's brains." 

"S-so why does Jungkook smoke it?" Seokjin wondered, remembering at the same time that he realized how Jungkook seemed sad about the life he was leading. But he shook the thought away: Jungkook had hurt him, he wasn't a good person and wasn't someone he should care about. 

"Because he's a moron," Taehyung immediately told him and to his great satisfaction, Seokjin nodded. "Now, let's go back to what we were saying, what did your mother say to you when she saw you in this state?"

"She told me to do what you asked me to and to come upstairs quickly," Seokjin admitted, letting Taehyung take on a smug look to tell him "see? I was right!", "she said she would bring me something to eat and that she would go find Namjoon herself to join me, as she didn't want me to stay outside."

Seokjin turned to Namjoon who was looking at him in silence and said with a small smile: 

"I wanted to see you because I wanted you to see me with my suit but now I'm not even handsome anymore," he regretted looking at his poorly put on, stained suit, missing his jacket and bow tie. He also wondered what her face and hair looked like.

Namjoon looked like he was about to say something but changed his mind and just nodded. This time, not only was Seokjin sad, but Taehyung looked at his brother with a frown. 

Namjoon's attitude seemed strange to him because normally, he would have jumped at the opportunity to compliment Seokjin and even to reassure him by telling him not to be sad, or to apologize for not having been there to see him when he was looking for him. But Namjoon didn't do anything about it. 

Once again, it was he who had to take responsibility for comforting Seokjin: 

"Don't worry Jin, I've already yelled at him for not having been there with you," he said, glaring at his brother, because he was far from having forgiven him for what had happened, even if Namjoon had, he had to admit, done everything to repair his wrongs. "Now tell us, Jin, do you remember what happened when you went up to the room?"

Seokjin nodded but now he was nervous. He remembered that Namjoon wasn't there. Someone else was, however.

"I went upstairs, I went to Joonie's room and... and..."

He turned towards the entrance to Namjoon's room, where his memory had led him and he saw the bottles of alcohol, empty or full, abandoned by his Yoona and his friends after having made him drink until make him sick. 

Then, with Namjoon and Taehyung still watching him, he turned his gaze to the balcony and his lips began to tremble, remembering that without wanting to, he had climbed onto the ledge and he had almost ended his own life. 

And even if he was lucky to still be alive, everyone had seen him acting crazy on the balcony, drunk! What was going to happen to him?! What was Mr. Kim going to do to him and his family?! The thought made his heart thump against his chest, but before he could imagine the worst scenario, he remembered something else that made his blood run cold:  when he was on the balcony he had seen Taehyung... dancing with Yoona

He stood up straight and walked away from Taehyung.

"It's you..." he whispered staring at Taehyung and pointing at him.

"Me? What are you saying?" Taehyung asked, perplexed.

"Yoona was here for revenge! Were you the one who sent her to me?!" Seokjin asked with a trembling voice. Overwhelmed by his memories, he held his aching head in his hands and seemed on the verge of crying.

Seeing him like this, ready to collapse and then walk away from him forever, Taehyung was relieved to be able to say quickly:

"No, Jin, it's not me, I swear! You know very well that I did everything to keep her away from you!"

"Then why were you dancing with her right after what she did to me?" Seokjin asked.

"Because I had to! And if I had known what she had done to you I would never have accepted, believe me!"  Taehyung explained urgently.

"I don't believe you, no one can force you to do anything!" Seokjin replied, shaking his head.

"But it's the truth, his bastard brother blackmailed me!" Taehyung protested vehemently.

He was desperate to see Seokjin accuse him like that, even if he had offered his brother to let himself be accused the day before. It was an absolutely horrible feeling and he didn't want to imagine Seokjin taking him for an enemy anymore.

"You're lying to make me believe it wasn't you who did this!" Seokjin replied, starting to cry, feeling betrayed. "How could you do this to me, Tae? Were you lying when you said you liked me over Yoona? When you said you wanted to change? Were you lying to better punish me afterwards?"

Despite everything Taehyung had said to him when they made up, despite all his promises, despite all his progress on his path to becoming a better person, he had lied and remained the bad person he had been.

Stunned to see Seokjin crying like this and believing without any doubt that it was him who had done this, Taehyung remained speechless.

"Taehyung didn't do this," Namjoon suddenly told Seokjin in a calm voice.

Surprised, Seokjin turned his head towards him. He had been so silent until now that Seokjin had almost forgotten his presence as his anger and sadness towards Taehyung had taken over. Taehyung almost gave his brother a look of gratitude before remembering that he was supposed to hate him.

"W-what?" Seokjin stuttered, rubbing his watery eyes.

"It's the truth," Namjoon continued, "Taehyung didn't do anything."

"How do you know?" wondered Seokjin, who had never doubted Namjoon's words. "You weren't anywhere yesterday, maybe he was going behind your back!"

"No, that's impossible," Namjoon said in his neutral voice that Seokjin was starting to find weird. "It's impossible because it was me who asked Yoona to do this."

Seokjin and Taehyung widened their eyes and opened their mouths wide at the same time. One because he couldn't believe what he just heard and the other, because he couldn't believe Namjoon told Seokjin what he did.

"T-This is a joke isn't it?" Seokjin asked with a nervous smile.

But Namjoon didn't smile back. He looked at him with a cold look that was unlike him and Seokjin lost his smile.

"J-joonie?" he stammered.

"I'm not joking, it's the truth. I asked Yoona to film you completely drunk and send the video to the director of Whimoon to prevent your admission to Whimoon. But I failed because right after, you were publicly exonerated by some people and even my father defended you."

Seokjin couldn't believe his ears: Namjoon had wanted to exclude him from Whimoon before he even entered? It wasn't possible...

"Namjoon, stop!"  Taehyung wanted to stop him, seeing the state Seokjin was in.

He didn't understand what Namjoon wanted to do. After all, he had said that Yoona alone bore the responsibility for what happened publicly, so why? Why did he want to tell the truth at the risk of breaking Seokjin's heart?

Seokjin, who had only just remembered what happened the night before and was upset about it, seemed to have been plunged into a bottomless abyss. He obviously would have been less hurt to learn that it was Taehyung who had done this to him.

"Why stop?" Namjoon retorted. "I no longer want to lie, I want to be myself and I want Jin to see the real me from now on. It's too tiring to act."

"No, no, no, I can't believe you, it's not you who's talking!" Seokjin refused. "You are sick, that's the only explanation, you must have been drugged too, without your knowledge!"

"Pff, you're a little stupid Jin, just like Taehyung. Birds of a feather flock together after all. I told you, it's really me," Namjoon denied. "You know, you should have listened to Taehyung when he told you, so many times, who I was, when he made you understand that I was worse than him. You let me manipulate you like an idiot and accused Taehyung of making your friend Seung and his family leave when it was me!"

"W-what?" Seokjin whispered.

"No, he's talking nonsense, don't listen to him," Taehyung said, glaring at his brother and silently telling him to shut up for good.

But Namjoon didn't see it that way.

"If you think I'm lying, tell me, how would I know that Jin is going to Eunma and not Whimoon?"

Silent with amazement, Seokjin felt his legs give way beneath him and found himself kneeling on the carpet, unable to utter a single word. He wasn't going to Whimoon?

"Namjoon, what did you do?!" Taehyung asked bluntly.

"I asked father to cancel Jin's admission to Whimoon and have him admitted to Eunma High School."

"And he accepted?!" Taehyung asked in shoked. "I can not believe it!"

"I'm his favorite son, don't forget that," Namjoon said with a shrug. "I obviously told him that you made the decision to go to Whimoon behind his back. He wasn't very happy. Now Jin is going to Eunma and so are you. I did pretty well, don't you think?" 

"You bast-!" Taehyung started, beside himself.

"Yeah, yeah, you're welcome," his brother cut in as he stood up, "now, if you two would like to go out of here, I'd be glad. I'm going to call someone to clean my room because between the bottles of alcohol, the vomit, and the idea of Yoongi sleeping in my bed, I think I'm going to be sick."

With these words, he left the room, leaving behind a horrified Seokjin and a shocked Taehyung. 

For a few seconds, Seokjin stared at the door Namjoon had disappeared through and, finally, he broke down and burst into tears, crying:

"It's a nightmare, I want to wake up..."





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