John

I lay my head in Sherlock's lap as we drive to the suprise destination Mycroft sent us off to. It's obvious Sherlock knows but doesn't want to say anything.

Sherlock takes one hand off the steering wheel and places it on my head. He begins to mess with my hair causing me to blush.

"How much longer?" I ask quietly. "Twenty minutes and 39 seconds." Sherlock answers.

"You're upset." Sherlock stops messing with my hair after I say this.

"I'm fine." He snaps causing me to tense. Slowly I allow myself to drift off to sleep.

Sherlock

Once John's asleep I allow my tears to fall. I hadn't meant to snap at him like I did.

I'm just worried and stressed out and sad. I'm angry at myself for allowing this to happen.

We pull up at my stunning log cabin vacation home. The last time I was here was the last trip I ever made with the family. Unfortunately it wasn't a good one.

"John." I say and gently nudge him. He sits up and stretches. My eyes go straight to his right arm and I suddenly feel the urge to vomit up whatever is left in my stomach.

"J-john I'll be...." Before I can finish my sentence I'm sprinting towards the backyard.

John

I sigh and put my jacket on before running to Sherlock's aid. This whole thing is obviously taken a toll on him which doesn't help his progress.

"Sherlock are y-" Sherlock is leaned against a tree smoking.

"William Sherlock Scott Holmes! What the bloody hell do you think you're doing!" I shout and as I get closer I notice the tears rolling down his cheeks.

"I needed it John." He sobs without looking at me. I take the cigarette from his hands and bring it to my lips.

"If you need it, I sure as hell do too." I say and take a puff. Sherlock sends me a look that was supposed to be a glare but ended up being a pleading look.

I drop the cigarette and stomp it out. "You're better than that." I whisper as Sherlock pulls me into his arms.

Sherlock

I notice John start to sneak glances at the house and I can't help but smile. "Go explore." I say and hand him the keys.

"What about our-"

"I got it. Go crazy. Be careful on the stairs remember what the doctors said about straining yourself." A huge grin spreads across John's face and he leans up to kiss me gently before walking as fast as his body will let him towards the house.

I sigh and walk to the car Mycroft let us borrow and grab our bags from the back. We didn't have time to grab much just enough to survive for a good two months.

John

I wonder around the huge living room in awe. This is like my dream house! A picture hanging on the call catches my eye.

Slowly I make my way over to it. There's a tug at my heart as I see a little boy with dark curls and shining blue eyes smiling with such joy it's impossible to hide it. That was Sherlock.

His arms are wrapped around a man I assume is his dad. He looks much like Sherlock with the dark curly hair but his eyes are a darker shade.

"My dad was a good man. He cared so much about Mycroft and I." Sherlock says from somewhere behind me.

"He treated us like we were royalty. Even on the day he....died......he made sure we were going to be okay." I notice the hitch in Sherlock's voice signalling he's crying.

I turn to see him sat on the couch with his head in his hands. Hesitantly I sit next to him and place my hand on his back.

"I'm sure he's proud of you." This causes Sherlock to look over at me. His gorgeous multicolored eyes are big and tear filled.

"You think so?" He whispers not bothering to try and hide his emotion.

"Sherlock I watched you run into the heart of a gunfight to try and save a friend, I know so." Sherlock's tears spill and I carefully wrap him in my arms.

"It's okay." I whisper over and over again to try and calm Sherlock a bit. He just holds onto me and sobs.

"I'm sorry I'm so emotional it's just...." Sherlock pauses, pulls away, then takes a deep breath.

"It's just a lot has happened and I'm not....I'm just having a hard time coping."

"Its fine Sherlock." I mumble and he doesn't relax any but sprints out the door.

Time Skip

Sherlock

I wonder back into the house to find the living room empty. John would've explored more so I'm assuming he's sleeping in the master bedroom right now. It is three a.m. any normal human being would be sleeping.

Slowly I make my way into the large homey room. My heart melts when I see John curled up in the middle of the California King sized bed surrounded in pillows.

Suddenly John's eyes open and he looks more scared than I've ever seen him look before. "S-Sherlock?"

"Its me you're fine." I mumble as I change into pajama pants. I don't feel like putting a shirt on. It's acceptable for my boyfriend to see me shirtless, right?

I slide into bed next to John and he turns away from me. I think nothing of it and wrap him in my arms.

"They screwed with my head Sherlock." John whispers. "There was this memory, or dream, I'm not sure what it was. But we were on the hospital roof. You told me that it was all a joke and that the government hired you to.....to....to end my life. You said you never loved me and you never would then I-" John's voice cracks and he burst into sobs just minutes later.

"John that never happened. He twisted your memory of what happened on the roof of Bart's." I pause and turn John so he looking at me.

"And there wasn't a time where I didn't love you. I've loved you from the minute we met, and nothing can change that." John leans up and kisses me like he never has before. Sure it tasted a bit like tears, but that's okay.

John's hands go from my shoulders down to my chest, then down to my stomach.

"You've not been eating." He mumbles as his hands trail along my ribcage.

"Not time for that. I had to find you and even if I did eat it'd just come back up." I defend myself.

"You'll starve if you don't eat something Sherlock." John protests but I pull him closer and enjoy feeling his chest rise and fall with mine.

"It can wait till tomorrow. Goodnight John."

John didn't argue and went right back to sleep, but I on the other hand got no sleep what so ever.