But no matter what, he couldn't let those feelings take over. Or could he?  

The following days went the same. I'd wake up, he'd insult me, mock me, hurt me with his mean comments. I'd try to keep in my tears, I'd try to smile my day away. But nonetheless, he was always there. When I suffered from another episode of the mate-loss syndrome, it was almost as if he panicked, even though he could hide his true emotions very well. He called for a doctor, after which the same old woman as the day before came to me. She told him this was normal, that this would likely haunt me for many more months before it would finally cease to exist. It was as if my body needed to constantly reassure itself that my soulmate was close by, that he would take care of me, love me, and hold me when I was in pain.  
So Aericon just held me through these episodes. After a couple of days he just decided that it was just easier for him if he just slept beside me at night, as according to him, the episodes I suffered would appear less frequently, and I would grow over the disease earlier.
I didn't mind it, as his body was godly, warm and it caused me to feel safe. At night we would start far away from each other, but usually after a couple of minutes he allowed me to scoot closer to him. Some nights he even put his arm around my waist before I fell asleep, even though he would always be wide awake and out of bed hours before I woke up. But even though he spent time with me throughout the day and night, he was awfully quiet, and I soon was bored out of my mind. While his body was close by, his mind was obviously far away.
Every time I tried to talk to him, he just sighed in annoyance. When I softly hummed to a song that was stuck inside of my head, he even told me out loud that he couldn't concentrate on his working. So I was quiet and bored, all day long.

Even though he pretty much ignored me all day, I sometimes could catch his eyes staring at me, after which he looked away so quickly I thought I had imagined it.
But I didn't, I was sure of it.
Did that mean he liked the way I looked? Even when I was in bed all day, wore no make up or wasn't dressed properly? That was a good sign, right? I sighed silently and turned my head to look at him.
His dark hair was shining in the sunlight that came through the large windows in his room. He seemed concentrated on a bunch of papers, a crease between his eyebrows slightly visible. When he was this absorbed in his work, he almost looked cute instead of scary. Almost. Because he still had the appearance and the scowl of an angry bear.

"What is it, Micara," he asked after I had been staring at him completely unashamed for a good couple of minutes. He still acted as if he didn't care, as if he was annoyed, but I sincerely thought I saw a twinkle of amusement in his eyes. I could have been mistaken though, maybe it was just the light.
Yhea that was probably it, the light.

"You are still staring."

"Oh, ehm, sorry," I stuttered, feeling my cheeks start to flush. "I, ehm..." Oh well. Now I was talking anyway, maybe he would listen this time? "I was wondering if ehm, I could maybe ehm, call my parents and my brother or something? I never received my phone after the ceremony, so maybe they are worried, and they would like to speak to me and," at this time I was just rambling incoherently, so much that I almost missed his answer.
"Sure."

"But I truly miss them and I haven't talked to-" I shook my head, feeling confused. "Wait what?"
"I said, sure. In ten minutes I have a meeting with the council I have postponed for too long, so I will provide you a phone so you can call them."
I was quiet for a couple of seconds.

"Thank you thank you thank you thank you!" I gushed out loud. He just rolled his eyes at me as he stood up and tossed his own phone at me. It was one of the newer models, the ones I couldn't even pay for if I saved all my money for a year.
"I'll be back in a few hours. Do not disturb me and try not to die please." With these words he left the room, not even bothering to wait for an answer.

I contemplated shortly what I would do. Would I call my parents first, or would I snoop through his phone? This was my opportunity after all...

No. That was wrong. That is what jealous bitches did, the ones that wanted the alpha only for his power. I wanted him to love me as much as I loved him, and he wouldn't ever love someone who just searched his entire phone for information I probably wouldn't even understand or need.
So I just dialled my home's number.

"This is the voicemail of Saul, Monica, James and Micara Johansson. We can't answer the phone right now, so please leave a message after the beep." I heard moms voice and immediately some tears sprang to my eyes. They had forgotten to change the voicemail after the ceremony. I patiently waited for the beep before I started speaking.

"Hey mom, dad, it's me, Micara. I was calling to show you that I'm still alive, and not MIA. It turns out, I truly am an Amor. The seer even told me I was one of the most obvious Amors she'd ever met! But, I also found my mate. You will never believe who he is if I told you, so I won't. You'll probably see him soon anyway. Ehm, well he treats me well, really good actually, and I already love him. He is really sweet to me and I'm sure you'll like him when you meet him. I miss you two, but I don't think I'll be back in the Amor quarters anytime soon. Love you a lot! Bye." I tried my hardest to sound utterly cheerful, as if I only told the truth, even though I lied a couple of times in the message. If I told him that the Alpha was my mate, and that he pretty much ignored me all day long, they would start worrying for my wellbeing and they didn't need to. I would survive this by loving him. Sometime, he would love me back.
I also called James and Francis, who I told the same lie. They didn't have to worry about me. I would be fine.

"