MAD BLUE

I WAKE UP early the next day to say goodbye to the newlyweds.

They're on their way to their honeymoon, a month-long trip around Europe. Denzel was't showing it to his wife, but he was worried. Minsan ko silang narinig kagabi habang nag-uusap sila ng kaibigan niyang doctor. He was assuring Denzel not to worry about his patients because he has them covered.

"Take lots of pictures, and don't forget to wear my bridal gift!" ani Liv as she hugs Angel.

Angel blushes. "Shh!" saway niya kay Liv at pasimpleng sinilip ang asawa habang nagpapaalam din ito sa mga kaibigan. Keenan and Kiefer are telling Denzel to take it slow. They're laughing and teasing him.

"Enjoy your honeymoon!"

My eyes stray back to Cynthia as she pulls Angel into a hug. "Don't mind Denzel if he's KJ! Have fun! Visit the museums and shop! OMG! I'm actually jealous!"

Angel laughs. "Excited iyon. Ayaw lang magpahalata sa 'yo." And then she faces me. "Be good," she tells me. "Don't cause any trouble. Gagatungan ka lang ni Liv at Cy 'pag wala ako."

I frown in denial. "I don't cause trouble." Tingin nito sa 'kin?

"I know you, Zar. You're always up to something. You're mischief."

"I'm always good." Inirapan ko siya.

She smiles, but I can see the dull spark of worry behind her eyes. "Don't forget to call me if something happens, okay?"

I nod in promise. "Sige na, naghihintay na sa 'yo ang asawa mo."

Her eyes brighten back at the mention of her husband. Post-wedding bloom, I think dryly.

After saying our farewells, they climb inside the car and wave their goodbye. Hinatid namin sila nang tanaw hanggang sa mawala na sila sa paningin namin. We go back inside but Cynthia pulls us to breakfast.

Kita ko ang pag-buntonghininga ni Liv. I also notice Keenan's mood—silent, yet dangerous. Nang maupo kami sa isang round table, I can feel the tension between Liv and Keenan. It's palpable, even to Kiefer. Si Cynthia lang yata ang hindi nakakaramdam.

Kung kahapon, si Keenan ang halos lumipad makaiwas lang sa kaibigan ko, now it's Liv who looks like she's chewing a mouthful of bricks.

"Where's Blue?" Cynthia asks as our meal came.

"Kailangan niyang umalis nang maaga kahapon," Kiefer says.

Cy crunches her brows. "Why? Did something happen?"

"Business, maybe." Kiefer shrugs casually. "Alam mo naman iyon, hindi masalita pagdating sa trabaho."

"I thought wala nang problema. Sabi niya a-attend siya kapag okay na?"

"He just didn't want us to be concerned. He took his PJ this morning. That only meant his meeting is urgent," Keenan speaks for the first time as he chews his medium-cooked steak.

"You mean, um-attend lang siya tapos umuwi din kaagad?" ngumuso si Cynthia. "Kawawa naman pala si hubby ko."

Umikot ang mata ni Kiefer. "You should probably go to your hubby and give him a massage."

I reach for my cold glass of water and take a sip, thinking—how is Blue pitiful? Saang parte? Kung alam lang ni Cynthia ang mga pinaggagagawa ng hubby niya. Didn't she see he left the reception with another arm candy to score yesterday?

"Hindi na ba siya babalik dito?" tanong ulit ni Cynthia.

Kiefer shrugs. "Dunno."

"Hindi na siguro," Keenan interjects. "He mentioned his work schedule is packed this week."

Cynthia huffs depressingly and pouts. "'Di ko man lang siya nakita bago siya umuwi."

Umiling-iling na lang si Kiefer. Well, I think it's better that she didn't see him. Kawawa lang ang babaeng kasama ni Blue kapag nagkataon.

They have plans after breakfast, but I decline when they ask me to come. I feel lethargic at ginamit ko ang oras na iyon para matulog nang kaunti. I haven't had a proper sleep ever since that serial brute—who owns a pair of sexy lips—kissed me.

And then last night. I slept late dahil kung anu-anong naiisip ko—and one of those images that kept me up was the picture of Blue leaving with a woman who has sultry eyes and a breathy voice purring at him all night.

Kung hindi lang sinabi ni Kiefer na umuwi ang kaibigan niya kagabi nang maaga, I would think he shared a bed with that woman.

Or maybe he did. Not here maybe, but somewhere else. In his condo?

Ugh! Stop thinking, Zara!

Why am I even wondering what he's been doing with that woman?! Well, I don't give a damn fuck!

I sleep for eight restful hours and wake up at three PM. Medyo madilim na sa kwarto ko, but I can see the light fighting to come through the thick curtain of the window. I toss my blanket and rise from my bed. Hinawi ko ang kurtina at pinapasok ang sikat ng araw. The heat of the sunlight hits my face, warming up my skin that's been chilled from the cool air of the air conditioner.

Napangiti ako sa ganda ng tanawin. Everything seems to glow under the radiant light of the sun—the gleaming aquamarine of the sea, the vibrant flowers amidst the rich greenery of the garden, the beautiful landscape. It's breathtaking, and I feel my chest constrict. It makes me think of home and the countless moments of my mother when I used to watch her watch the sun dip and fade into the horizon. I miss home. I miss my mom.

But I can never see her again...or come back.

Falling a step back, I walk to the bathroom and carefully wear my contacts. Pumili rin ako sa mga dala kong damit and I settle for the orange-brown bikini that has an intricate pattern, because it's either that or the red one. I slip an oversized white tee over it, gather my phone, sunscreen, sunglasses, and the sarong that matches my bikini before making my way down to the infinity pool.

I sigh and push my shades up to my head. The sunlight is blindingly bright even on the surface of the gleaming pool, which has a capturing illusion of water spilling over into the sea below. It's almost hypnotic.

Oh, what a bliss! I lay my sarong on one of the loungers beneath the sun umbrellas that line the side of the pool and lay there. Kaunti lang ang tao rito sa parteng ito ng resort. Many guests and tourists prefer the sea and the adventure, katulad nina Cynthia at ang ibang kasama ko. I think they went diving, dahil iyon ang nakita ko sa recent Instagram post ni Cynthia at Liv.

They've been calling me and leaving me messages while I was asleep, at napagod siguro sila kaya hindi na nila ako kinukulit ngayon.

Hinubad ko ang t-shirt ko at nagpahid ng sunscreen sa buong katawan bago ako humiga sa lounger. I stretch languorously and sigh in content.

It's so nice when there's no Blue hovering behind my back. No flirt who always attempts to seduce me with his crass words and hazy eyes and sexy lips, and I hope he would remain out of my sight for the rest of the day. No—make that a week.

Pagkalipas ng ilang minuto ay dumapa ako para ang likod ko naman ang mainitan, shielding my eyes from the brightness of the sky.

Smiling, I close my eyes and bask under the warmth of the sun. It isn't scorching hot and the afternoon air isn't as humid as it is usually in the morning, but it still makes me feel slumberous.

Hindi ko alam kung ilang oras akong nasa ganoong posisyon. It's only been minutes and I already feel drowsy again, kahit na ilang oras akong tulog kanina. The warm air is just so still and quiet, lulling me to sleep. Nararamdaman ko na ang pagbigat ng mga talukap ko.

"You're not being careful, kitten," a deep, playful voice awakens me.

Mabilis kong nabuksan ang mga mata ko at dismayadong napasimangot. Blue stands beside my sun lounger, his tall frame hovering above me. His brows are furrowed while his eyes are hidden by his dark shades, which only defined his sculpted nose.

He's wearing a pair of black shorts that outline his muscled thighs and a simple cotton polo shirt that emphasize his broad shoulders. It's unbuttoned and carelessly open all the way down, giving me a glimpse of his chiseled chest and those ripped abs.

The stolen pictures of him in magazines and articles don't do him justice. They can't really capture his raw masculinity that demands attention and make everyone's eyes cling to him.

He sure does work out, I think dizzily and find my gaze drawn to that eagle tattoo hugging his well-defined biceps. It seems hell-bent on unsettling me for making me want to trace and touch it.

My heart suddenly wakes up and stirs inside my ribs, picking up its rhythm when he sits down. "You have to take care of your fair skin or the sun will burn you if you lie out here for much longer."

As if! It's not even that hot!

"What do you think you're doing?" I ask tightly as he leans over me, reaching for something. Lalo akong kinabahan nang makita kong hawak na niya ang sunscreen ko.

"You should have applied more before you fall asleep," he tells me, taking off his dark shades.

"I already did," I lie, dahil hindi ko naman abot ang buong likod ko. I attempt to turn around before he can touch me, but he stops me with the electric sizzle of his hand on my shoulder.

"Stay still, kitten," he commands alluringly, ignoring my sharp intake of breath as he pours the cold cream on my back.

"Nakikita mo ba ang laki ng payong na 'to?" agap ko. The sun is hardly hitting me.

I'm about to tell him that I can do it myself and I don't need his help when I feel the first glide of his fingers across my shoulders as if it were the most natural thing for him to do. To touch me. And it feels disgustingly good and relaxing.

Fuck! He's so damn bossy.

I almost let out a moan when he hits that soreness on my neck and massages it smoothly. The sensation of his strong fingers stroking my shoulder has no right to feel this good, damn it! But I'm already breathless, and I struggle to drag air into my lungs while he smooths the cream onto my skin.

Napalunok ako nang maramdaman kong bumaba ang mainit niyang mga palad sa likod ko, and he continues to slide them lower, all the way down to my spine.

There's nothing intimate with what he was doing. In fact, he's only applying lotion on my back like how people normally do. If he were someone stranger, I wouldn't probably feel it like this.

But still, I can't stop the shudder that runs along my skin where his palm touches my skin.

A hot ache throbs between my thighs as I imagine those smooth hands stroking over my bare bottom and lower...

"Shall I do the rest?"

Napaigtad ako sa gulat. What the fuck was I thinking?!

"I think that won't be necessary," I growl, moving away from him. I can feel my face burning from embarrassment.

Tumayo ako at mabilis na hinila ang sarong at inikot iyon sa akin. I hear him mutter something under his breath.

Tinapunan ko siya ng tingin. He's staring at me, and another wave of heat fires through my veins when I recognize the undisguised hunger darkening his eyes.

He stares for what seems like an infinitesimal second, and I can feel the tangible tension throbbing in the air. Bigla ay tumayo siya at naghubad ng damit. He just drops it on the floor and walks to the pool area, suddenly diving in the pool, creating aggressive waves against the calm water.

Nagtatakang pinanood ko siya. He swims in fast strokes across the pool as though he's being chased by a shark.

I'm tempted to go and leave, but it would only look obvious that I'm running away from him. Well, I don't want him to think that he's getting to me.

Nasa ganoong pag-iisip ako nang umahon siya sa pool. Water streams from his hair down to his body, and I find myself rooted to my spot. Damn!

He's awfully handsome, but in a pair of black shorts, he's something else. He's devastating. His skin glistens like diamonds under the sun as water droplets cover his skin. I can't help my eyes from straying lower, but the sight of a distinct bulge beneath his shorts stops me and my head snaps back to my shirt. Pinulot ko iyon at nagkunwaring may ginagawa.

Now I regret not leaving!

He picks up his shirt too and places it on the lounger as he sits back down.

Wala akong sinabi nang tingnan niya ako. I just slip on my shirt, and my heart lurches when I discover that he's watching me intently, the way my shirt slithers down my body. I can feel the heat of his gaze as the fabric glide down as if it were his hands caressing me.

Bumalik ako sa pagkakaupo. "Do you like watching me?" taas-kilay kong tanong. Why is he looking at me like that?

Umangat ang labi niya. My heart pounds heavily when he suddenly drags the lounger he's sitting on closer to me. "You want an honest opinion?" he says, not waiting for my answer. "You've got great legs. Your body is too hot to be hidden. Why do you need to hide them? Why not show them off?"

Tumaas ang kilay ko lalo. "Why the assumption that I'm hiding anything? At bakit ko naman gagawin iyon? Just because I have them doesn't mean I have to flaunt them. My legs and body are my business. I decide what clothes I wear, and there is nothing wrong with them."

He reaches out and slightly tugs my shirt down. "I just don't think it's really you."

"Please. Like we know each other." Hardly.

He lifts a hand to rake his wet hair back from his brow. "I'm just saying. You're beautiful, Zara. Your clothes should show how stunning you are, not hide it."

Gamoto!

"Fleeing again, huh? Frightened to be alone with me, kitten?"

Natigil ako sa pagdampot ko ng mga gamit ko. I turn to glare at him. "I'm not. I want to rest peacefully, if you haven't noticed. Ginugulo mo lang ang pagpapahinga ko." If he so much as touches me again...

His eyes squints as he laughs. "You're so full of spark. I just love teasing you. My favorite diversion, apart from sex, of course." Humiga siya sa sun lounger. "Come back and sit down, Zara," he invites and smoothly stretches an arm behind his head, his chest muscles visibly contracting. "I promise not to steal another kiss."

My temper is simmering. Wala ba talaga siyang pakialam sa pakiramdam ng ibang tao? He actually believes every woman on earth will fall on his feet. Maybe he's a Steele and he doesn't give a fuck about anyone, but even then, how can he live his life revolving around sex and sin?

I can't believe I am attracted to this man who's enslaved by his lust and basic senses. He's too reckless and wild.

But he makes you feel.

I roll my eyes at that insidious voice. Where is it even coming from?

Bumalik ako sa pagkakaupo at mas piniling humarap sa pool. I fold my legs and hug my knees close. Akala ko ba umalis siya? Keenan said he had a full schedule at work, so what's he doing here, lazily lounging as if he has all the time in the world?

"I thought you left early," hindi ko naiwasang sabihin.

A satisfied smile plays on his lips. "So you missed me after all."

"Patawa ka." Inis na sinuot ko ang salamin ko. He just ruined my small piece of time in heaven.

"I can be wherever I want because I can." H spares me a glance. "Got a problem with that?"

Arrogant ass.

I know he's the boss of his hotel chains and his freaking empire. He can afford jet-setting wherever he put his mind into. But, really, may oras pa siyang magbakasyon kahit na may problema sa trabaho?

That's being irresponsible and capricious.

"Chill, kitten," aniya nang manatili akong walang kibo. "Life doesn't have to be wasted on dull mediocre things. I do the work. Work does not own me."

I roll my eyes even though he can't really see past my sunglasses. Linyahan ng mga taong walang problema sa pera. Tell that to those who are starving!

"I have some business to attend to, if you must know," he indulges.

"A hookup, you mean."

His dark eyes twinkle. "Ah, you're already jealous." He smiles at me. "Don't worry, kitten. These lips won't taste any lips without your permission...apart from yours, of course."

It's like believing that moon is bigger than the sun. I don't buy it.

But why do your lips sizzle and tingle?

"Hindi mo na kailangan ng basbas ko para mambabae. You're licensed. Women will forgive your faults and all because they all adore you." Hell, they worship this supreme seducer.

"You really don't believe that I want you," seryoso siyang nakatitig sa akin ngayon.

That sizzle again. "You don't fool me. And you're my boss."

"You're a woman first before you're an employee. Second, I don't have rules on how I choose my woman. Employee or not, I want you."

"Sira ulo ka nga talaga."

He bursts out laughing when I expected him to be angry. "See? I can't even be mad at you. People, especially women, shower me with praises—well, except my sister—and I rarely allow them to speak to me like that. Except from you. You're a breath of fresh air."

Oh, I'd love to knock that air out of you!

"Well, I don't like you at all," I reply crisply. "Turn your attention away. Maraming babae d'yan, I'm sure hindi ka mahihirapan. We're all just an arm candy, anyway. Easily replaceable. And you won't even remember me."

Something flares in his eyes. Is that annoyance? Pain? Did I offend him? But it's quickly gone even before I can name it.

"You're so hard on me." He smiles lazily as if nothing passed in his eyes. Or did I imagine it? "You shouldn't really let your tragic past experience cloud your judgement towards the rest of us. Cynicism doesn't suit you, kitten."

"Stop calling me that. Hindi ako kuting."

"But you act like one. An adorable little kitten who claws back when backed up in a corner. Do you ever smile?" he asks, gracefully moving to rise from the lounger and sitting in front of me. His gaze goes to my mouth. "When was the last time you were carefree? And laughed?"

Anong tingin ng lalaking 'to sa 'kin? Robot? "I laugh when I need to laugh."

Ngumuso siya. He's still looking at my lips. "Do you know that laughing releases dopamine? The feel-good hormones. Helps relieve stress, improves mood..." he trails off, and his eyes lock with mine. "It's like sex."

My feet are aching to kick him away. "Are you telling me I need it because I look stressed?"

"I'm saying you need a man to lighten you up. Cool that temper."

"So you think a bit of sex will cure me. Well, let me tell you that I'm perfectly happy with my life the way it is. Salamat, pero hindi ko kailangan ng lalaki para gumanda ang pakiramdam ko."

"Yes, I think you do. Why don't you describe him to me?" he asks indulgingly.

"Sino?"

"The guy you put on a pedestal. Your dream man."

That almost makes me snort. Dream man? Is he for real? "If I do," which I don't, "bakit ko naman sasabihin sa 'yo? I won't even introduce him to you."

He lifts a shoulder in one of his careless shrugs. "I would like to compete with him."

Now I can't contain my disparaging laugh that sounds much like a snort. "Bakit hindi mo na lang kaya ako ihanap ng ka-date? Marami ka naman sigurong kilala. You have connections. I'm sure you can find me someone to solve my loveless state and help me cure my desperate need for hot sex," I say sweetly.

"You're treading on dangerous ground here, kitten," he says darkly. His gaze narrows and focuses on my mouth. Hindi ko alam kung kailan siya gumalaw, but he seems a lot closer now.

My gaze is drawn to his lips. I know his kiss won't be a gentle seduction—and knowing that sends little shivers down my spine.

"You feel it, don't you?" he drawls softly.

"I don't know what you mean," I deny, my cheeks burning fiercely.

"This sexual thing going on between us," he says calmly, so calmly that it makes me want to punch him.

How can he be so calm about it when I don't even want it? I don't want him wanting me. I don't want to want him.

But even if I fiercely reject that, I can still feel the tightening sensation deep down. "There's nothing between us," I say desperately, more to myself than to him. "Anong ginagawa—"

He cuts me off by placing a finger on my lips as he takes my glasses away from my eyes, his dark eyes trapping my gaze. "Deny all you want, but there is something, and I'm drawn to it just as you are."

This time, he's going to kiss me. Nakikita ko iyon sa mapupungay niyang mga mata. My heart stops beating when he leans forward. The air seems to vibrate with tension.

This is complete madness. I only met him a few days ago. He's only playing a game with me, trying to distract me so that he can accuse me I'm not so different from the other girls he fucked. That I'm eating my own words.

My mind whirls as I smels his minty warm breath. The sensible part of me is telling me to push him away, but my senses are seduced by his musky scent as his mouth hovers over mine, and I'm trapped by the curiosity of what his kiss would feel.

The splashing sound and the shrill shouting of a group of teens shatter the silence and jerk me to my senses.

And just in time, I think grimly—before I made a fool of myself.

"Don't even think about it," I bite out, my eyes shooting him a warning.

He blinks and smiles, feigning ignorance. "I don't know what you think I was doing," he teases, but he steps away.

Pasimple akong huminga at tumayo. It's the same moment he stands up and our bodies touch briefly. Mabilis akong lumayo sa kanya na tila ako napaso.

This is crazy! How can I be so drawn to a man like him?

I wouldn't be interested in someone like him. Not with his reputation. Not with his unrefined, laid-back attitude. He wants a woman who can play his stupid rules and I'm not that woman. I don't fit in with his expectations.

"You know what's going to solve this problem," he suggests.

"Forget it, Steele," I say, hating the husky tone of my voice. "It's not going to happen." Not a chance. Not ever.

"Good to know," he says, walking away with the sight of his taut buttocks and powerful thighs, leaving puppy eyes all over his trail.

***

INIS kong itinapon ang tissue sa trash can bago lumabas ng banyo. Lalong tumataas ang init ng ulo ko sa tuwing naalala ko ang nagyari kaninang hapon.

For someone who has a problem with his empire, Blue doesn't really seem so concerned and disturbed. If anything, he looks marvelous. Fresh. Enigmatic. He even has the audacity to lift up his hand and give me a friendly come-and-join-me wave while girls lay at his feet, feeding him fruits and pouring him wine.

Maybe he thinks I would eventually fall for his seduction and be reeled into his harem with a crook of his finger.

Disgusting ass.

I sigh annoyingly. We were supposed to leave hours ago, but now I find myself squeezing between bodies I don't even know. The crowd is dancing to the beat of the wild music that feel in war with the calm nature.

Kumawala ako roon at hinanap ang mga kaibigan ko. I only went to the bathroom and now they're gone. Bakit pa ba nila ako sinama kung maghihiwa-hiwalay rin kami?

I groan in frustration and crane my neck to spot familiar heads among the crowd. Nada. All I see is the band playing on the stage and a sea of people banging their heads.

Nabanggit ni Mitch kanina ang tungkol sa band concert ngayong gabi. It was Blue's idea to bring the party up during the wedding guests' stay before we depart tomorrow.

For all I know, gusto lang niyang mag-party. How party-starved.

Nang maka-ilang ikot pa ang mga mata ko sa paligid, I decide to give up and walk back to my hotel room. Gusto kong matulog nang maaga para magising ako bukas nang hindi na naman sumasakit ang ulo ko sa beyahe. A sleepless night does that to you.

I'm tracing the soft sand beneath my feet when I hear that scared pitchy cry, snapping my head to a dark corner where the lights from the concert do not reach.

Napakunot ako ng noo nang makita ko ang isang lalaki na mukhang galit na gakit at akmang sasaktan ang babae.

I don't know what happened to me. A trigger maybe. Seeing that man with his hand threateningly in the air—as if to strike the girl—has my heart slamming hard into my chest. It beats so fast from pure, bloody rage. It's the feeling that makes me understand why people commit murder.

Sa galit ko'y hindi ko na namalayang nakalapit na ako sa kanila at malakas na itinulak ang lalaki. He looks surprised at first as he watches me help the girl to her feet, and then his eyes go crazy again. Eyes that used to be so familiar to me. Red, bloodshot eyes.

Dad's eyes.

"Ella, come here," the drunk man orders in a slurred voice as he tries to pick up his bearing. Lulugo-lugo siyang tumayo at naglakad palapit para hilahin ang babae, but I get in his way. There's no fucking way that I'll let those filthy hands touch her. Not a single damn finger!

"Get out of the way, you bitch!" he snarls. I don't flinch, because he isn't my father.

He's about my age and the girl he's mistreating looks probably seven years younger than me.

"You get away from her, asshole," I grit out through my clenched jaw. Naramdaman ko ang nanginginig na kamay niya sa damit ko. She's clutching it so tightly she could tear it. "Subukan mong saktan siya."

"Wala kang pakialam sa amin! Ella, halika rito!" This time, he wildly reaches for her arm.

Hinampas ko ang kamay niya at inilayo si Ella. My blood is thundering in my veins and I can hear it rushing in my ears. "Bitiwan mo siya!" I shout, but not nearly enough to drown the noise at the party. I don't think anyone can hear us. Or help us.

I shudder, but I don't let that fear inside. He's not merely a boy. He's taller than me and his built looks strong. He can hurt me so easily, but with this adrenaline pumping inside me, I don't care. I want to hurt him—so bad.

Why do some men feel the need to exert their power? Their aggression?

Nameywang siya at ibinagsak ang ulo na tila nagbibilang. And then he looks up and smiles, dropping those mean sadistic eyes, but I can still see them. Nanindig ang balahibo ko sa nakikita ko. He looks like Satan with a demonic grin as he cajoles Ella to come to him.

"Ella, baby. I'm sorry. You know I can't hurt you. I never want to hurt you. I love you, baby. Please, come to me and I'll make it better. Hmm?"

I can feel Ella losing her power, being lured into his poisonous lies and promises, by the evilness of his tongue. "Ella," pigil ko sa kanya. I look at her and see my mom in her scared, helpless eyes.

And then something happens so fast.

One moment, I'm looking at Ella, and then she shrieks, but it's not for her. It's for me, but I was too late to realize that.

Hinatak ako ng lalaki at nakita ko ang kamay niyang handang manakit. I know it's seconds away before his angry big palm lands on my face. I can already feel its sting.

Pero hindi iyon nangyari, kahit na handa ako akong harangan iyon. The next thing I know, someone punches the guy and throws him like a sandbag on the ground.

Blue. I recognize him before he can even turn to me. I almost gasp from the anger brimming in his eyes, and the tightness in his jaw. He can crack a nut with it.

"Are you out of your fucking mind?!" he snaps at me. At hindi iyon nakatulong sa galit na umiikot sa dibdib ko. I still want to hurt someone so much until this fury inside me burns.

"You didn't have to do that! I can handle—"

"You obviously can't," he cuts me off furiously. His eyes are fiery and blazing.

"Are you saying that because I'm a girl?" Hindi ko na mapigilan ang inis ko. He actually thought I needed a knight in shining armor to do the fighting for me? How arrogant and chauvinistic is he?!

"He was drunk," he snarls, pointing an angry finger on the man who was still lying down. "He's bigger than you. He could hurt you."

Tumawa ako nang pagak. "Now you're concerned about me? Well, shove that damn concern in your conscience, if you have any, dahil wala ka ring pinagkaiba sa lalaking iyan. You hurt women!"

I know, beneath this frothing anger, I know I'm out of line. But hell, I just want to lash out or else I'll break down.

He walks—stalks—over to me and comes just a breadth away from my face, reeking with his silent anger. "Don't you dare compare me to him," he says, and every word feels as if there's a finger stabbing my chest.

"Why not? Maybe you give them the best sex, but you hurt girls, too—emotionally. What's the difference? Huh?"

His eyes flash dangerously as if to warn me not to go there, but I'm far too gone to step back. I'm tired and annoyed and vexed as hell from everything that he has been doing to me! Flirting with me. Seducing me. Bothering me. I want him to stop!

"You think just because they agreed with your no-commitment-just-sex rule you don't hurt them? Then you leave when you get what you want with no second thoughts. Hey, you had fun, I got the sex, let's call it quits?" I scoff with an overflowing sarcasm that's probably dripping from my pores. "You play them and then you dump them. You mess people up. That's what you do."

Hindi siya agad nagsalita. He just looks at me with stone-dead eyes as if I just struck a sensitive nerve inside him. "At least I'm not the one who's scared to be who I am," he bites out. "You think you're better than the rest of us with your bluenose looking down on us? You're. A. Coward."

"I'm not a coward."

"Yes, you are." His eyes cut to me in a derisive gaze. "You got burned once and now you hate every man's guts. You hate passion and you fight yourself because you're scared. You run away at the first kiss. You run away from what you feel. You're a coward."

"You think I'm scared? Then, what about you?" I poke a finger in his sternum, pushing him back, but I might as well be pushing a wall because he doesn't budge. "You're scared of falling in love. You're scared of commitment. You're scared to let someone in because, what? That she might see how rotten of a bastard you are?" I poke him again. "Get over yourself and grow up."

He removes my finger away from him as if it were a disgusting worm. "Tapos ka na?" he asks in a threatening voice, a nerve ticking on his left cheek. His eyes are hard, his jaw is clenched and stubbornly rigid.

But I refuse to back down. He's always so laid-back, always laughing, the party-starved playboy. I want to get under his skin, and now that I can see beneath that charming façade, I see a bitter, mad man.

"You always want things to go your way. You push and push and it's annoying, alam mo ba iyon? Siguro nga walang nagsasabi sa 'yo, but you are nothing without your money," I say, poking him again. "So don't ever think you're what those greedy girls want. It's your money."

He draws a ragged breath and suddenly takes my arm in a tight grip, hauling me through the swarming people who I realize are coming from the concert and stopping to stare at us. Noon ko lang naaala si Ella at ang lasing na lalaki.

"Bitiwan mo ako." I yank at his grip. I need to check on Ella.

"Keep moving and shut the hell up," he says through gritted teeth, striking me with a steely glance.

"You're hurting me."

Niluwagan niya ang hawak niya, but not enough for me to tug free.

"Zara!"

Nilingon ko ang tumawag sa akin. It's Liv with Keenan. Nakita ko ang tangka niyang pagsunod sa amin, as if to rescue me, but Keenan stops her by holding her shoulder. Beside him is Ella, and it dawns on me that they've been listening to us fighting the whole time.

I glance at Blue who's still holding me and dragging me somewhere. He glances at me and I snap my mouth shut.

"Keep that fucking mouth shut," he warns, eyes like black stone. Almost heartless.

He drags me inside the hotel, rudely ignoring the staff who greets him as he pulls me through the hall. Inis na pinindot niya ang elevator sa mismong floor kung saan ako at mabilis iyong nagbukas na tila ramdam din ang galit niya.

I keep silent when he tugs me inside with him. Hindi pa tuluyang nagsara ang pintuan nang isandal niya ako. He roughly pushes me against the wall before his mouth comes crashing down on me.

His mouth is scalding hot. I was right—it's nothing like the first kiss, and it's not enticing either. It tastes like a punishment—a kiss meant to inflict pain as if to give me the same pain he felt, letting his fury flow. Burning me.

I put my hand on his chest and push him away, but he only takes my wrist and holds both of my wrists on either side of my head, caging me in with his body, deepening the kiss with a low growl.

The daring thrust of his tongue makes my heart rate rise and my knees weak. I could've fallen on the floor if he weren't holding my hands hostage with his tight grip.

He explores my mouth ruthlessly as if it were a dish he never tasted before. He savors and nips and bites, taking all that he wanted. My glasses are smashed between us, at tila nainis siya rito kaya mabilis niya iyong tinanggal at itinapon.

He never lets me escape, never lets me breath, even when I taste blood on him. His body is firmly pressed against me that I can feel every powerful throb of his brazen rock-hard erection.

Fuck.

I kiss him back using my teeth and my tongue, letting go of all that anger gripping me and that sensual fire I smothered for so long. Blue gives me an appreciative primal groan deep in his throat.

Naramdaman ko ang pagbitaw niya sa mga kamay ko. Instead, he ruthlessly snakes his fingers through my tousled hair, holding me tight for an open-mouthed kiss. He takes control of me, his tongue tangling with mine in an erotic dance that has my hands wrapping around his neck. My fingers dug through his hair, pulling him close.

The raw passion that goes through me is scary. My senses are reeling, dissolving my self-control into dust. Hot desire is a streak of fire racing through my veins, like an unstoppable force. A trainwreck.

My breasts feel heavy and sensitive crushed under his hard chest, my inner core outrageously wet and weeping with ache and want. I can feel it when I move my body against his.

As if knowing my throbbing need, his hard thigh came between me, intimately rubbing against me and wrenching a gasp from me. Goosebumps cover my skin, and I feel the tightening of my core in response.

His tongue drives deeper into my mouth, making me whimper breathlessly in pleasure, but he suddenly stops. With a muttered curse, he pulls away from me, his eyes dark and guarded.

Habol ko ang hininga habang napahawak sa mga kamay ko. I can feel them hurting now that the sexual haze is slowly fading.

He glances at my wrists and his brows draw together. Tila hindi niya mapigilan ang sarili at inabot niya ang kamay ko. His face tightens as he examines the faint red marks from his grip, then his eyes go to my stinging mouth.

"I'm sorry," he says gruffly, swiping a finger over my lower lip with such care. He grimaces as if it physically pains him to see the consequence of his mad kiss.

Sorry?

I stop the outraged laugh brewing inside me. Is he sorry for kissing me mercilessly? I don't want his apology for that kiss. I want...I want...

What, Zara?

Gamoto! I tug my hand from him. "You can let me go now," I mutters, my lips pressed so tight I think my jaw is seconds away from snapping.

"I don't think it's safe to let go of these hands," he says, his expression unreadable, but I can see the dark gleam of unquenched desire in his eyes. "If my balls are going to be kicked, then I might as well make sure it's worth it, don't you think?"

I bite my lip from anger, giving him a resentful look that belied that aching in my core—something I can do without. "You're so unbelievable. I'm not interested, Steele. I'm not sleeping with boys who only see girls as sex dolls."

He laughs derisively. "I'm hardly a boy, kitten. And yet you let me kiss you."

"That should've never happened." Crazy—because that was the most amazing kiss of my life. And it was from this manwhore.

"I'm sorry," he says again almost looking rueful, surprising me. "I shouldn't have said those things."

Pinulot ko ang itinapon niyang salamin ko nang makita ko iyon sa sahig. "Yes, you shouldn't have. Because you know nothing about me."

"That makes the two of us." He gives me that fallen angel's smile. "You should try dating more. There are far worse men than me out there if you bother to look."

The lift doors open, giving me the escape I need. "Hindi na kailangan. You're enough of a headache to me as it is."

Hindi ko na siya hinayaang magsalita. With my body still tingling, I step out and walk away with my back stiff and my shoulders pulled back, knowing one thing—kissing Blue Steele is dangerous and way too thrilling for a woman who doesn't believe in happily ever afters. Not with anyone. Not with him. Definitely not with the man who only sees me as the temporary object of his desire and lust.

By the time I reach my room, I realize he broke his promise—he kissed me. And it wasn't a kiss I would forget any time soon. It was a mad kiss I would be thinking about the entire night and for the rest of the week.