°°°

"Woah, your killer is a god."

NABALIK sa reyalidad si Jaffnah nang makitang nakasilip na naman si Red sa drawing niya, pero ngayon ay bagong bihis na ito at bagong shower. "It looks like you're fantasizing about him, don't you?" Nakangisi si Red nang asarin siya nito.

Jaffnah scowled. "Why would I?" Her eyebrows were knitted.

"Inaangat mo ang kamay mo, na para bang hinahaplos ang mukha niya." Red demonstrated what she saw Jaff did earlier. "Crush mo?"

"No, of course not! I was lifting my hand 'cause I'm going to strangle him to death!"

Natawa naman si Red. "Okay, if you say so." Tiningnan niyang mabuti ang drawing ng kaniyang kaibigan. "Anyway, his handsome face looks like one in a million. Hindi katulad ng mga nakakasawang mukha ng artista sa television. Mukha siyang model," komento pa nito.

Jaffnah glanced at the sketch she made, but what brought to her heart was a pierce of anxiety. She doesn't have the time to fantasize about his face or anything. Rumaragasa sa dibdib niya ang kaba at pag-aalala habang iniisip kung anong dahilan kung bakit siya nito pinapatay sa panaginip niya. Mas lamang ang mga katanungan na tanging ang lalaki lang na iyon ang makasasagot.

"Am I getting myself into a pit of my death?" tanong ni Jaffnah sa kaniyang isipan.

Hindi siya nakatulog nang maayos ng gabing 'yon. She was having an anxiety, overthinking that she couldn't come out from the house to find another decent job. Lalo pa't naiisip niyang nakabangga niya itong minsan, at nasa panaginip siya nito. Maaaring kilala siya nito at baka isa sa mga araw na ito ay matunton ang pamamahay niya at patayin siya. Natatakot siyang pati ang best friend niya ay madamay rito.

"Jaffnah! Look at this!" sigaw ni Red, kaya naman madaling tumakbo si Jaff papunta sa sala kung saan nanonood ng television ang best friend niya.

"Look at that man!" Turo-turo ni Red ang lalaking nasa TV na hindi kaagad nakilala ni Jaffnah. "He's that guy in your dream! Fuck it!"

Jaffnah's eyes widened when she realized who her best friend was talking about. Her heart skipped a beat when she saw the picture of that man in the news.

"Mr. Zefarino Salvatorre Hawthorne, has finally shown his face and revealed his true identity in his retirement. He will be having his very first and last book signing tomorrow at the Manila International Book Fair at the SMX Convention Center MOA Arena. He is the famous author of the mystery series, Dick Brain, which stole thousands of hearts from readers. This might be his farewell, so see him at the event."

Napanganga na lamang si Jaffnah at halos mawalan ng hininga sa narinig at nasasaksihan niya. "H-he is an author???"

Jaffnah immediately seized the book from Red, which her best friend was in the process of reading, and noticed the abhorrent initial on the back of the book. There was a capital letter Z in low opacity. Natatamaan lang ito ng sikat ng araw kaya nakikita. Kaya pala hindi niya ito napansin kagabi.

"So, I was wrong all along. There's an author's name on the book but it was hidden and only the keen observer will see. His real name is Zefarino. He was unknown until today, when he decided to show himself," bigkas ni Jaffnah habang pabalik-balik ang mga mata sa telebisyon at sa makapal na libro.

Binuklat ni Jaffnah ang libro hanggang sa dulong pahina para makita ang section kung saan naroon ang About the Author. There's no picture of him there, but only two sentences describe who he is.

"The author started writing when he was nine. The stories he has been writing are produced by his mere raw dreams."

Napasinghap ang dalaga.

"Ibig sabihin ang nakabangga mo kahapon ay ang popular na manunulat na siya ring nakita mo sa panaginip mo, Jaff, na pumatay sa 'yo. Mahihirapan tayong komprontahin siya," nababahalang tanong ni Red. Sandaling nag-isip si Jaffnah bago isinara ang libro at tinitigan ang mukha ng sikat na manunulat na iyon sa screen ng TV.

"He showed himself all of a sudden. He decided to hold an event on short notice," salita pa ni Jaffnah. "He wants me there."

Kumunot ang noo ni Red. "A-ano? Anong ibig mong sabihin?"

"He wants to see me. He wants me to go there."

"Parang imposible naman yata iyan, Jaff! Why would he? Does he really know you?"

"That's the question, Red, why would he? Does he really know me? Wala akong ibang makitang dahilan kung bakit nagpakita siya!"

"Then are you going there? Remember, he killed you on his dreams! Hindi ka ba natatakot?" nag-aalalang tanong ni Red.

"I need to confirm if I was right."

*****

"Jaff! Sandali!" tawag ni Red kay Jaffnah na ngayo'y walang pakialam kung sino ang makabangga habang mabilis na lumalakad papasok ng Book Fair.

"Jaffnah, ano ba? Kung totoo ngang ginawa niya ito para magkita kayong muli, bakit ka naman pupunta? Paano kung may gawin siyang masama sa 'yo? Ako 'yong kinakabahan at natatakot sa 'yo, eh!"

Hindi natinag sa mnga tanong na iyon si Jaffnah. Wala na siyang pakialam kung makagulo siya rito sa book fair. Ang nasa utak niya na lang ay kailangan niyang makita ang lalaking iyon upang malaman kung bakit siya nito pinatay sa panaginip niya.

"Jaffnah, please! Makinig ka naman! Alam kong matapang ka, pero nag-aalala ako sa 'yo! Maraming tao rito! Paano kung isa sa kanila ay nakahanda nang patayin ka? Paano kung may inutusan siya? Please, umuwi na tayo! I'm sure, mag-aalala sa 'yo ang mama mo! Paano na ang kapatid mo kung mawala ka? Paano na si Jefferxone?"

Napatigil sa paglakad si Jaffnah tsaka lumingon sa kaibigan. "Kung gano'n, mas may rason ako para puntahan ang manunulat na iyon. Kailangan kong malaman kung bakit ako nasa panaginip niya. I need to know why he's killing me."

Dere-deretsong pumunta si Jaffnah sa stage kung saan isinasagawa ang book-signing at meet and greet ng isang sikat na author, ang lalaking hinahanap niya, si Zefarino Zalvatorre Hawthorne.

Jaffnah stomped her hands on the table, which caught that famous author's attention. She was catching her breath, pero tila ba mas lalo iyong bumigat at lumalim nang magtagpo ang mga mata nila. It was like what happened when they first met.

"Yes, my lady? How can I help you?" tanong ng manunulat na nakakulay itim na long sleeves na bukas ang dalawang butones sa itaas. Magulo ang makapal at itim nitong buhok. Hindi maitatanggi na sa simpleng pagtingin lang nito ay matatanggalan ka ng hininga dahil sa angkin nitong kaguwapuhan.

"D-do you remember me?" nautal na pag-usisa ni Jaffnah sa lalaki.

"I'm sorry, my lady, I don't. I am not into young ladies."

Napaawang ang bibig ni Jaffnah sa sinambit ng lalaki. She sucked her teeth in frustration.

"This is the face you fucking killed last night, Sir," may diin niyang salita.

He frowned. Maging ang mga nakarinig na fans ay nawindang sa sinabi ni Jaffnah. Malakas na bulungan ang yumanig sa buong hall. Ang masasaya nilang mukha ay napalitan ng mapanghusgang tingin sa sikat na manunulat.

"What are you talking about?" Lumamlam ang mukha ng lalaki tsaka tumingin sa mga security. Agad namang hinawakan ng mga ito ang braso ni Jaffnah upang palayuin sa table ni Zefarino.

"You killed me in your dream!" malakas na sigaw ng dalaga na nagpatahimik sa lahat. "You killed me in your fucking dream!" Hindi palamura si Jaffnah, but because of desperation, she did to emphasize her side.

"In my dream?" Natawa ang sikat na manunulat at napahawak pa sa bibig nito. "How come you knew about my dream last night?"

Buong lakas na nagpumiglas si Jaffnah sa security upang muling lumapit kay Zefarino.

"I can enter dreams, sir," matigas niyang bigkas. "And dreams represent unconscious desires, nightmares of the past, or a premonition of the future," dagdag ko pa. "I don't know why you killed me last night; that's why I'm here. Are you a serial killer? Are you planning to do it? When? Why? How? Are you going to stab me multiple times just like how you did to me that night? Why? Why did you do it? May nagawa ba ako sa 'yo? Kilala mo ba ako?"

The man's pupils dilated, but he surely hid it with his blank and nonchalant expression. "I don't know what you are talking about, just like how I don't know who you are. Is this your strategy to get my autograph quickly?"

Jaffnah scowled. "Mukha ba akong fan mo?"

"Then, if you are not, you can leave. This event is limited to my fans and readers."

Jaffnah squinted and puffed air into her cheeks. Immediately she started to feel her blood boil for him. Magsasalita pa sana siya nang unahan siya ng lalaki.

"Also, I don't believe that anyone can enter dreams. You must be lucid dreaming; you misunderstood that it was my dream when it was yours." Sinubukang bumalik ni Zefarino sa pag-eentertain sa kaniyang mga mambabasa.

Samantalang nagngitngit naman ang mga ngipin ni Jaffnah. Sa buong buhay niya, ngayon lang siya nainsulto nang ganito kaya muli siyang sumugod dito. "A-anong sabi mo?! Binabaliktad mo ba ako? Alam ko ang nakita ko at kailanman hindi ako nagkamali pagdating sa mga panaginip! Nakakapasok ako sa panaginip kapag natitigan ko nang matagal ang mata ng tao! Katulad ngayon, sigurado ako, makakapasok na naman ako sa panaginip mo!"

Umiling ang manunulat na para bang hindi nakukumbinsi at sinensyasan ang reader ng 'hintay lang' bago nilingon muli ang nakikipag-away na babae. Gusto niya nang matapos ang humahaba nilang pagtatalo.

"Lahat ng panaginip ko ay naaalala ko at wala sa mga sinabi mo ang nakita ko sa panaginip ko, so close the curtains on your show now if you don't want everybody to see you as a madwoman. Don't worry; even if you partially ruin this event, I won't hold a grudge and I won't kill you. I don't even know how to properly cook a meal myself, how am I supposed to stab you with a knife? What a good farewell party for fifteen years of writing career, thanks to you."

Zefarino flashed a sarcastic smile, which was a deadly weapon that literally stabbed Jaffnah's heart. It killed her for a moment and made her stunned to speak.

"Also, 'For in the multitude of dreams and many words, there are also diverse vanities," dagdag pa ng lalaki. "Ecclesiastes 5:7, it says."

Jaffnah gritted her teeth. She was about to lose her defense but now already ready to battle up because of the thing that the writer stated. "Sinasabi mo bang walang kabuluhan ang panaginip ko?!"

"I don't. I just stated a Bible Verse. Did that sting you?"

Napapikit si Jaffnah sa inis. Kung maaari lang niyang sakalin ang lalaki ay ginawa niya at inunahan itong patayin. "Then, you left me with no choice! If you don't believe me, I'll show it to you tonight. At kapag nakapasok akong muli sa panaginip mo, you owe me an explanation," matigas na saad ni Jaffnah tsaka dinuro ang lalaki.

Hinawakan naman ni Zefarino ang hintuturo ng dalaga bago ngumisi. "You're wasting your time on me."

"It is not a waste if it's for my peace of mind."

Napangiti naman si Zefarino. Sa pagkakataong iyon, hindi niya na rin napigilang mapatingala. He even stuck his tongue on his cheek.

"Kaya huwag mo akong maliitin, may kabuluhan ang panaginip ko lalo na ang kakayahan ko," seryosong sambit ni Jaffnah habang nakatitig sa mga mata ng lalaki. Siniguro niya talagang mapapasok niya ang panaginip nito mamayang gabi.

"Then, prove that it has. See you in my dreams, lady."

°°°

[Missy Forevah: I would also like to take this opportunity para makapagpasalamat kay @_sundaze sa ginawa niyang fanart sa ating famous author na si Zefarino Salvatorre Hawthorne! Thank you so much, Sundaze!]