Waking up, he was out of bed, my body sensitive, far too sensitive, the door opened, Jackson stood there in leather trousers, a tray in one hand, laptop in the other.

"Good morning Kitten, I have your breakfast" 

My smile growing big, the thought of him bringing me breakfast in bed, the fact he wore the leather trousers just for me.

"Thank you, Sir, you look especially hot this morning" His smile twisted into teasingly.

"Well Kitten, you see I had a good night last night, tormenting a perfect little pussy, I have to say, I think it has a fetish for my love" 

Nodding I agree.

"Oh Sir, it certainly does, you are its only sin, the only one to break me down, while I love it and fix me back again" 

He placed the tray down, the laptop next to me as well, his lips kissing mine.

"Well, I figured you could do your daily blog post from here, I will leave you to it Kitten" He walked towards the door, stopping and turning back, winking before closing the door after him.

After eating, I began writing on the blog, explaining last night to my followers. At the end I decided to talk about safe words.

We use Yellow, this is something I say when I am close to my limits, sometimes I forget about it, it is just as important as your other safe words. 

Yellow is a good way to tell your Master your close to your limit, you can add things on such as I have cramp, so they understand why, or your scared, this tells them what is going on in your mind, they can try resolve it, so the scene can continue.

We use peach instead of red, red sounds like blood, flashing lights scary, I prefer peach, it is gentle and almost relaxing. 

The safe words are used to tell your Master to stop everything, right there, no they can't continue what they are doing till the end, they have to stop.

Green, is a different word, there is mixed views about it, 

"Green, I am happy, and everything is fine" "Green, I am okay" These can be said throughout play to let your Master know you're okay. 

Sometimes, when you say Yellow you're your reason why, your Master may slowly stop everything, if your too exhausted to take any more mentally or physically they will more than likely slow down and stop. It depends on your reason.

I have not gone into aftercare much, but it is important, after every scene me and Sir cuddle, we talk if I am able to stay awake long enough, we talk about how the scene went, things I liked most, or didn't like as much, it is a part to bring us both back to reality.

Walking to the bathroom, I began to get washed up, Jackson coming in, climbing into the shower with me, his arms wrapping around me, his hands washing my body as I leaned on him. 

Getting dressed, then walking downstairs he sat waiting for me.

"So, I think we need to talk about Sarah, your mum, which ever she is" 

Everything flooded back, I had forgotten about all that, I'm not even sure I want to know about her. 

"Sit Kitten" He patted the chair next to him, the girls asleep having a nap, so there was no excuse. Sitting down he placed the photos in front of me, my mum, pictures of just her, and her holding me, even one with my dad.

"She was my accountant for many years, during the time I learnt a lot about her, she had explained how she was married, met someone and while she thought she loved him, he was using her, she was scared of him, she said she had a child, that the child was taken because of circumstances beyond her control, she ended up staying with the bloke for years, until she got the courage to walk away, you could say he was like Max, she's been alone since"

 Was this him saying it wasn't her fault what happened to me? That she had met someone like Max? My eyes looked at him, confused, sensing it his hand grabbed mine.

"Look, all I know is she told me what happened that made you be taken was out of her control, that she couldn't have stopped it and she had no way to prove it. 

She was being controlled, hurt, like you with Max" His words making me angry, how could he compare us?

"No, because I would not let anyone do something to hurt the girls, no matter how much they hurt me, or controlled me, a real mother wouldn't let that happen, then claim she had no idea how it happened" 

The fact he is trying to compare me to her is crazy, I am nothing like her.

"Look, her number, email and address are here, if you want them, they are there. I won't force you, it is your choice, just don't make the wrong one based on a story that you don't have all the facts to"

 I nod, I don't think I want to, but at the same time I do.

"Anyway, you need to go to work, check everything is set up, it is completed, they called this morning you just need to sign and confirm it"

 That was good news, something I could be happy about.

"Come with me?" 

I looked at him, I would rather he be by my side when I went than anyone else. I can't believe I have my own business, a business here to help women, and make the world a better place because of it.

"Okay, Georgina and my mum are sat in the garden waiting for the girls to wake up, so will ask if they can watch the girls" 

Walking out, he came back in a few seconds later, 

"Get ready then" Grabbing my coat and bag, I was ready. Georgina and Helen came in, sitting in the living room, waiting for the girls to wake.

Reaching the building it looked amazing, my heart was beating too fast, I have a business, an actual business. Walking inside was beautiful, the lobby was big, spacious with a bar, beautiful and elegant. All the rooms where exquisite, it looked perfect.

"Well, I cannot see a single issue, can you?" 

I looked at Jackson, waiting to see if he had found any issues.

"No, you planned it out beautifully, it is warm, inviting and has a safe feeling about it" Relief flooded me.

"So, the plan is, I have the girls during the day while you are here working, if there are issues on my side, Georgina, Helen and Liam can help with the girls, you have a manager sorted for 5pm till 10pm classes, so everything is perfect" 

I still feel unsure about leaving the girls, yes, it is for work, but it still seems too soon, although they are one now.

"So, when do I get a private show in one of the rooms?" I looked at him confused. His arms wrapped around me, gently and lovingly

"When do I get an exclusive pole dancing show?" His lips kissing my neck, he knows how to get me to submit.

"Well, considering I don't know how to do it, you will have to wait till I have some classes, wouldn't want me falling and hurting myself now would we Sir?" Smiling he nodded in agreement.

"Well, let's be honest, this place looks amazing, and it opens in three days, are you ready for the opening party?" 

I was, I couldn't wait everyone was invited and it was going to be an amazing night, a full night off so I had plans for me and Jackson as well.

"I sure am, nothing can mess it up, now let's get home" 

Pulling him out he threw the keys are me, driving home things were great, everything looking up. Reaching a cross road, putting my foot on the breaks nothing happened, panic beginning to rise in me, I looked at Jackson, turning the corner grateful there was no cars.

"The brakes not working Jackson" My voice panicked, my legs shaking unsure what to do. His laugh threw me, did he think this was a joke? I had already crashed a car once this week.

"Jackson, I mean it, what the hell do I do?" He looked up at me now, seeing the panic in eyes his whole body shifted.

"Right change to second gear and move your foot off the clutch slightly" I did as he said, moving my foot off the clutch a bit, unsure what slightly meant.

"Good, I am going to pull the hand break, we should be going slow enough that it doesn't throw us off the road" Watching as his hand gripped it I closed my eyes, not wanting to see.

"Alena, it's okay it has stopped, good job we were taught that in the navy" 

How could he be so cool and calm? I was soaked from sweat, why the hell have the breaks stopped working. His eyes looking at mine, seeing the panic still in them, kissing me gently trying to calm me down, the thought of crashing again scares me, the thought that at that crossing had cars been coming we would have hit one and there is not a chance I would walk away from another crash so soon. 

His kiss did nothing, my mind was screaming at me, shouting at me like it was my fault.