Full Name

"I don't like pink. Make it red." Utos ko doon sa manikurista na pinapunta ni Papa para ayusin ang kuko ko. Today I will celebrate my birthday.  Well, kasama ko si Illea sa party. Birthday niya kasi two days from now. Last year ako ang nakisabay sa kanya kaya siya naman ngayon ang sasabay sa akin.

It has been a family tradition na sabay naming icecelebrate ang birthday namin ni Illea. I was born two days earlier. At para daw makatipid kami, palaging pinagsasabay ang birthday party namin, as if the need for 'pagtitipid' is really true. My family is like, the richest ever. 

I took my gown and wore it, making sure that my hair was not messed up. My gown hovers between purple and blue, with ocean green satiny curls that fan its way until the bottom. Naiimagine ko na si Seven kapag nakita ang suot ko. Paniguradong magwawala yun kasi hindi pink. 

I just hate pink. Nagmumukha akong kawawa at babyish. I don't like that. I want everybody to treat me seriously. Because I am Serise Victoria Montreal. 

Bumaba na ako sa hagdan. Naghihintay na si Seven sa akin sa ibaba para iescort ako sa may reception. Nakaupo siya sa tapat ng chocolate fountain habang hinihintay mapuno iyong baso ng chocolate. 

"EH?! Bakit ganyan yung gown mo?" reklamo niya nasa may kalahati pa lang ako ng steps. Pinagtaasan ko lang siya ng kilay. Pakialamero talaga. 

"Shut up." I told him. Kinuha ko iyong baso ng chocolate niya at inilapag sa kung saan. 

"Stop stealing the chocolate Seven. Mukha kang patay gutom." Asik ko. Nakakainis naman kasi itong kapatid ko. Ngumuso lang siya bago inayos iyong necktie niya. 

"Para kang si Baby Matthew magsalita." Reklamo niya. Kinuha niya ang kamay ko at isinabit iyon sa braso niya. I flipped my hair before sighing. May dumaan na waiter sa harap namin na may dalang finger foods. Kumuha si Seven ng strawberry dipped chocolate at inipit lang iyon sa bibig niya. 

"Seven!" sigaw ko na. Tumawa lang siya. Sa inis ko ay pinalo ko ang bibig niya para mapasok ang strawberry at ng machoke siya. Bakit ba ako nagkaroon ng kapatid na abnormal? How I wish Kuya Shawn and Kuya Seth are here. Atleast them I can tolerate. 

"Stop calling the boys baby! And stop acting as if you're gay Seven." I told him. Sumeryoso lang siya bago ako pinitik sa noo. 

"Bummer. Ang boring mo." Aniya. I smiled before pinching his cheeks. 

Well, Seven is always bored. Kaya nga umaarte siyang bakla para pagtripan yung mga tao sa paligid namin. Even Papa and Lolo were quite nervous about him. Akala nila kasi magkakaroon na ng baklang Montreal. Hindi nila alam abnormal lang yung kapatid ko.Muntik na ngang maheart attack si Lolo noong ninakaw na naman ni Seven yung bra ko. Sayang nga hindi natuloy eh. 

The party was already starting. Si Illea ay kasama si Tita Shana at Uncle August. Kausap nila yung ilang stock holders ng Wave. My cousin saw me and she immediately smiled. I smiled back at her. Boring ba? Well, I'd rather die than listen to the oldies talk about the stock market. 

Illea was taken away when Noah came. Dinala siya ng kababata ko sa dance floor at isinayaw. My hand tightened around Seven's shoulders as I stare at the two of them. 

"Happy birthday Boss." Matthew greeted me. Pinaghila niya ako ug upuan kaya agad naman akong umupo. Rome was talking with girls near our table while Caius was just staring at nowhere. Pupusta akong inaantok na naman yan. 

"Anong oras matatapos itong party?" tanong niya sa akin. Napanguso si Matthew. 

"Kakastart pa lang Cai. Tae, inaantok ka na naman ba?" he asked. I just shook my head before standing. Naririnig ko ang bahagyang pag aaway nina Noah at Illea kung nasaan ako nakatayo. 

Hindi ko napigilan ang mainis. Noah is well aware of the fact that we are engaged to be married. Once I turn 25 we will be wed. Alam kong pareho naming ayaw iyon pero hindi namin magawang tumutol. But then, he should not act like that in front of people. Ano na lang iisipin ni Papa at ni Ninong Greg? 

"Wanna dance?" preskong tanong ni Rome sa akin. Inakbayan pa niya ako habang nakatingin naman kina Illea. 

Hindi na ako nakaangal noong hinila niya ako sa dancefloor. Hinawakan ni Rome ang beywang ko at nagsimula ng sumayaw. I glared at him when I felt his hand tightening around my body. 

"I'm telling you Falcon, i will surely kill you kapag lalong humigpit yang hawak mo sa akin." I told him. Tumawa lang si Rome and I almost rolled my eyes. He glanced at Noah and Illea who are still dancing. 

"Noah likes Illea." Aniya. I nodded. As if I am unaware of that fact. Alam ko iyon. Alam naming lahat iyon. Si Illea lang ang manhid na hindi nakakapansin na gusto siya ni Noah. 

"But Noah is engaged to you." Dagdag niya. Bumitaw kaagad ako kay Rome at humakbang palayo sa kanya. His brows knotted. I fixed my gown before staring at him. 

"I won't listen to your whines Rome. I don't want you to feel bad for me because my fiancé is dancing with my cousin instead of me. Huwag mo akong itulad sayo na palihim na nagseselos." I said. I clenched my fists as I turned my back away from him. Dumb ass. Kung nagseselos siya kay Noah ay hindi na niya ako dapat isinayaw. Palagay ko ay dinala lang ako ni Rome doon para mapagselos si Illea. 

Jerk.

Bumalik ako sa table namin. Matthew's gone while Seven was at the chocolate fountain again. I sat at my chair before staring at the party. 

"Hindi pa ba tayo uuwi?" tanong ni Caius sa akin. Tiningnan ko lamang siya bago umiling. 

"Umuwi ka na kung gusto mo. Walang pumipigil sayo." Mataray kong sagot. Naiinis na talaga ako. naiinis ako kasi patay gutom si Seven. Naiinis ako kasi jerk si Rome. Naiinis akong  insensitive si Noah. Naiinis ako sa kanilang lahat. 

'I know that the bridges that are burned along the way
Had left me with these walls, and these scars that won't go away
And opening up has always been the hardest thing until you came' 

Lumapit si Rome kina Noah at Illea na nagsasayaw. I saw how mu cousin blushed when Rome asked her to dance. Tapos tiningnan ko si Noah na mukhang inis na inis pero wala ding nagawa noong kinuha ni Illea ang kamay ni Rome.

I breathed hard. Hindi ba talagang marunong mag isip si Noah? Nasa paligid ang pamilya namin pero lantaran niyang ipinapakita na gusto niya si Illea. Hindi ba niya inisip na nagmumukha akong kawawa sa ginagawa niya--- 

"You're overthinking Serise." Narinig kong sabi ni Caius. I just glared at him. Nakatiklop ang braso niya at nakapatong roon ang baba niya habang pinapanood din sina Rome at Illea. 

"Shut up." I hissed. Hindi ko na mahanap si Noah habang si Illea at Rome ay mukhang nagkakatuwaan na. 

"Noah likes Illea." Aniya. Napahigpit ang kapit ko sa tinidor na nasa may tapat ko. 

"Alam ko. Your cousin already rubbed it in my face Cai. You don't have to do the same thing too." Sagot ko. Umayos si Caius ng upo bago pinaglaruan iyong baso.

"Alam mo naman pala, bakit may engagement pa rin huh?"

"You know I can't do anything about it. Gusto ni Papa na makasal ako kay Noah." 

"Pero yun ba yung gusto mo?" he asked. Lumuwag ang hawak ko sa tinidor bago yumuko. 

'So lay here beside me, just hold me and don't let go
This feeling I'm feeling is something I've never known
And I just can't take my eyes off you
I just can't take my eyes off you'

"I don't want to marry Noah." Sagot ko. It's true. Ayaw kong maikasal sa kanya dahil kaibigan ko siya at parang kapatid na. Isa pa, he doesn't even pass my standards of a boyfriend. Paano pa ang asawa hindi ba? 

And most of all, he likes my cousin. 

Caius stared at me. I bit my lips before staring at Rome and Illea dancing. "But I don't want to disappoint my father Caius. Making him proud is my priority." Dagdag ko. Sakto kong nakita si Noah na may hinihila ng kung sino at isinasayaw. Pero iyong titig niya ay nakay Illea at Rome pa rin. 

"And besides, I still have nine years. Siguro naman makakapag move on si Noah kapag narealize niyang si Rome ang gusto ni Illea at hindi siya."

Ngumuso si Caius bago nangalumbaba. "So you'll just settle for that? The second choice? The forced option?" aniya. Sumandal siya sa upuan niya at pumikit. 

"That's not the Serise that I know." Dagdag pa niya. and for the first time, in my sixteen years of existence, I was speechless. Wala akong naisagot sa kanya. 

"I know you're hoping to have what our parents have Serise." He said after moments of silence. I looked at him calmly. Nakapikit na siya at mukhang patulog na. Sinuot na rin niya sa kaliwa niyang tenga ang earphones niya. 

"I don't know about love or what it is supposed to mean. I don't know how it exists or if it is even true. But what I know is that you always deserve more. You deserve more than what you settled for Serise." Dahan dahan niyang sabi. Humikab siya ng bahagya. Niluwagan na niya yung necktie niya habang ako ay nakatitig lang sa kanya. 

"It doesn't matter if you disappoint Ninong just because you stood up for yourself. Anak ka niya kaya tatanggapin ka niya." I opened my mouth to speak. Siguro nasasabi niya iyan dahil walang expectations sa kanya ang mga magulang niya but I am different. My father expects things from me. 

He opened his eyes and looked at me. "It's worse when you disappoint yourself Serise." 

I just shook my head. Natawa ako ng bahagya habang tinitingnan siya. "Bakit may sense ka kausap ngayon?" tanong ko na lang para maiba ang topic. Caius won't understand me. Yes, he is my bestfriend, but he doesn't have any idea how hard it is for me to disappoint Papa.

"Palagi akong may sense kausap Serise. Masyado lang mababa yung mga standards ninyo kaya hindi ninyo ako naiintindihan." Nakapikit niyang sabi. I pouted. Bwisit. Binabawi ko na. Wala siyang kwentang kausap.

Umayos ako ng upo at umusog para tumabi sa kanya. 

"Do you really think I deserve more?" tanong ko sa kanya. He opened one of his eyes. 

"Ewan ko. Bakit ako ba tinatanong mo?" masungit niyang sabi. Kita mo ito. 

"Nakakainis kang kausap Caius Ezekiel Falcon, alam mo yun?" iritado kong sabi. Ngumisi lang siya.

"Alam ko Serise Victoria Montreal. Alam ko." Natatawa niyang sabi. Yabang!

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Song Used:

Can't Take My Eyes Off You - Lady Antebellum

*pen<310