Song of the chapter is
I Should Hate You by Gracie Abrams

-41-
-Saina Bahl-
-Present-

__________

Malhotra Mansion
29 November, 2030
1:15 pm

As I folded the last bit of my husband's laundry, a sigh escaped my lips.

The strain from the past few days had taken a toll on me. Even though I was physically recovering, I still felt weak at every spot. My mind felt like it was at several places at once.

My decision to get back with Gautam had been an impulsive one, and yet, I felt myself oddly unburdened by its reprucusions. Since our talk, he had not posed any more problems for me or asked me to go back to Gurgaon with him. He was quite nice to me actually, much to Zoya's annoyance who still felt like it was all an act.

But I chose to disagree.

It seemed like Gautam was truly trying to redeem himself and I was gonna give him the chance to prove me right. If he truly meant it, I was okay with forgetting the past and moving on.

Because when had dwelling on the past ever done me any good?

As I tucked the clothes inside the closet drawer, the shrill ringtone of my phone echoed from the other side of the room. I sauntered towards the nightstand and picked it up.

An unknown number flashed on the screen.

My breath hitched in my throat. For a whole decade, the killer had only ever texted us cryptic messages. Not once had he made any calls whatsoever.

The thought soothed my mind for a split second. But still, with hesitance, I tapped on the answer button and put the phone to my ear.

"Hello?"

Silence.

"Who is this? Hello?"

Silence again.

"If you think this is funny-"

"Hello, Saina."

Shivers ran down my spine. My hands trembled in place. The cold icy voice cut through my phone screen and pierced through my ears.

"W-who i-is this?"

"It's truly a shame that we haven't ever spoken to each other." The voice spoke. "This call is long overdue."

"Y-eah?" I stammered, panicking. "I would've li-liked to keep it that way."

"Aw, don't be like that!" Came his raspy response. "You know, out of all the others, you're kind of my favourite."

"What do you think we are?" I fired back, agitated. "Dolls? That you can play with us anytime you want and then discard us like meat!"

"Oh Saina, you're much more than dolls to me." He responded. "You're my puppets. You move the way I want you to move, you do what I want you to do."

I scoffed. "You're a coward, hiding behind a fucking mask! Trying to play god! But guess what, asshole? It won't work! You'll loose."

"Oh really?"

"Yeah!" I said with determination, the anger crawling my nerves.

"Hm, interesting." He said after a pause. "But I must warn you, Saina. I'm good at many things, but loosing isn't one of them."

I opened my mouth to say something but he interjected,

"And as a matter of fact, I am wonderful at finding your deepest darkest secrets. I'm sure you already have a hint of that by now!"

"Fuck you!" I cursed.

"Watch your language, Saina." He mocked. "Now what would your husband think if he heard you utter such absurdity?"

My blood froze in my veins.

"Stay away from him." I rumbled.

"You don't get to decide that, Saina." He responded in a bloodcurdling voice. "I do."

My chest heaved up and down as my breath became heavier.

"Does your husband know about what you did, Saina?"

Panic bubbled in my mind.

"What?"

"Does he know? Does he know how you killed his child? Does he know that you have the blood of an innocent in your hands?!"

"Stop it! Stop it!"

"It's time for you to pay for your sins!"

And with that last threat, the call disconnected. As I stared at the phone screen, my mind raced through several different thoughts at once.

Would he tell Gautam about it?

Was Gautam in danger?

What was he planning?

I swallowed the lump forming in my throat for the longest time and paced back and forth. Chewing the inside of my cheeks, I decided....that maybe it was time to tell him the truth myself.

He would surely understand, right?

Yeah,.... yeah he will. He has to. I'll tell him my reasons. Sure he'll be angry at first, but he can't stay mad at me for too long. We loved each other. He loved me.

Yes.....he loved me.

He would understand.

With determination, I inhaled a deep breath and walked out the room. Running down the stairs, I found him sitting on the living room couch, on his laptop. His reading glasses were perched atop his nose as he read something closely.

My eyes scanned our surroundings. Zoya and Veronica were back in the kitchen, preparing lunch. Kartik was sitting at the dining table, scrolling on his phone while Siya was nowhere to be seen.

I would have to get him back to our room to talk.

Or maybe it was better to do it in front of people..... you know, in case.....

"Weird." He muttered under his breath but my ears caught it.

"What?" I asked and he looked up at me and then went back to looking at his laptop.

"I just got an attachment from an unknown Gmail account."

My body stiffened in it's place.

"What?"

"Yeah, but it's not opening." He responded. "I don't know, could be a virus or something."

I knew it wasn't.

He had sent this. It had to be him.

My eyes widened at the thought of him opening the message. God knows what he had sent him.

"Maybe you shouldn't open it-"

"Oh wait, it's downloading."

A stab of fear trickled down my bones and tempted my senses. All of a sudden, my body seemed to have charged up.

As my fight or flight response kicked in, I felt a surge in my stomach. I had to do something, something to stop it.

To stop him from finding out.

Intrusive thoughts poured in. In the next moment, I found myself pretending to stumble and kick the centre table, causing his cup of coffee to spill all over the laptop.

Gautam instantly stood up as the warm liquid came in contact with his body and cursed, "What the fuck!"

But the damage was done.

The laptop was no longer working anymore. I let out an internal sigh of relief.

"Damnit!" He cursed again, trying to fix the laptop and get it to start again. "It has all of my important files in it!"

"It's okay, Gautam. We can get it fixed later-"

"No it's fucking not okay, Saina!" He bellowed. I shuddered in response. A painful silence followed after.

From my peripheral vision, I could see Kartik get up from his seat and take a seat towards me.

"Dude, calm down alright?" He said, in a stern but careful tone.

"Don't you fucking tell me what to do!" Gautam cursed at him. My eyes widened. This was gonna get out of hand.

"Okay, first of all, you need to stop yelling because it's not gonna undo what's already happened." Kartik warned in a more stern voice.

"Gautam, come on, it's just a laptop-" I began but he interjected me again.

"You don't fucking understand, do you, Saina?!" He lashed at me. "For you, it's just a laptop! Because you get to just sit at home and enjoy the luxuries that I provide you with! Do you even have an idea about how hard I work just so you could keep those branded shoes on your fucking feet! Do you?!"

I bit my bottom lip but stayed quiet. My friends had now all assembled in the living room, bewildered looks on their faces as they watched the scene unfold.

God I wish the ground underneath could just open and swallow me whole right now.

"How would you?! Because all your life, whatever you've got has been provided to you like some fucking princess in a castle." He lamented. "It's always what you want! You don't give a fuck about what happens to others unless and until it fucking fits your needs!"

"You're making a scene, Gautam." I whispered, immediately hating my voice. I loathed myself for being so weak more than I had ever done in my entire life.

"Aw, are you going to cry now? So that every one of your friend thinks I'm the bad guy? Huh? Isn't that what you want?"

My eyes glistened more. I could feel my throat closing up. Words refused to come out of my mouth.

"You're just a pathetic and selfish person who only cares about herself!"

"That's enough, asshole!" Zoya shouted, her voice bellowing through the ceiling.

"Shut up!" Gautam retorted at her. "This is between me and my wife! So don't you dare interfere!"

I closed my eyes as fresh tears streamed down my face.

A moment later, he grabbed my arm like he always did, his fingers pressing onto my skin, leaving indentations and said, "We're getting out of here, whether you like it or not!"

"Gautam no-" I protested, trying to free my arm from his hand when in a spur of a moment, Kartik grabbed him by the collar and pushed him against the wall.

My heart stopped it's rhythm for several moments.

Beside me, Veronica and Zoya looked equally terrified.

Kartik's hands were pressed against his neck as he held him strongly against the wall. "What do you think you're doing?" He hissed, his voice low and terrifying.

Gautam didn't say anything in response just stared in bewilderment.

"Who gave you the fucking audacity to think that you could just waltz into my house and lay a finger on my friend?"

Zoya's hand rested on my shoulder as Kartik continued, "If I see you anywhere near Saina again, I swear to god, I'll kill you myself."

My tears had dried up by then, my throat dry. My heart felt like it would burst out any moment.

"Now get out of my fucking house!" He bellowed, pushing Gautam to the side. He stumbled as he caught his balance and glared back at the rest of us.

And then collecting the last bit of his dignity, he angrily walked out the main door. Kartik followed suit, as he walked inside and slammed the door to his room.

For the next several seconds, there was a deafening silence in the house.

I opened my mouth to say something, anything..... trying to justify or even understand what had just taken place when Veronica walked towards me and wrapped me in a warm hug.

And it was enough to make me loose whatever composure I had left in me.

I bawled as I rested my head against her shoulder and she let me. Zoya wrapped her arms around both of us and the three of us stayed in complete silence, just sobbing.

And in that moment, I realised that it didn't matter how different we were from each other, or how differently messed up each of us was, at the end of the day, it was only a woman who could understand another woman's pain.

Because in this messed up little world, all we ever had was each other.

___________

this one's for my gals and girls!
the ones who stick around in dire circumstances and the ones who pour all of their love onto their girl friends!

because i know i'll be okay no matter what, as long as I've got my girls!

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