Songs for the Chapter:

Another One Bites The Dust- Queen

The Girl is Mine- Michael Jackson

{M A U R A}

I didn't open my eyes for a long time.

And when I did, I swear I felt someone standing over me. Everything was deadly silent, excluding the waves of the Lake, and somehow I didn't trust that. It filled me with dread.

"Hey there," said a soft voice that I couldn't believe belonged to Jax.

I looked up at him skeptically, and suddenly felt extremely self-consious. I was curled into a ball on a splintery old boardwalk, surrounded by trash and cigarette butts, all alone. No one was in the little space behind the diner anymore.

I wondered if the fight had passed that quickly. Jax's face was so battered from the last fight, I had no clue if he'd partaken in another.

"I'm looking for this girl. Think you can help me out?"

I waited for him to explain himself, but he didn't. So I just looked at him. "Wait, what?"

He sighed, seeing that I wasn't gonna budge and proceeded to take a seat beside me.

"You heard me. I'm looking for a girl."

"Mhmm..."

"But not just any girl," he said carefully, and stopped looking at me. That caught my attention.

"And... what does this girl look like?"

He smiled sheepishly. "Oh, I dunno. She's only the prettiest-- no, most beautiful girl I've ever seen. By far."

I rolled my eyes and glared at the ground. "What's so great about this 'beautiful' girl?"

"You know her, quite well I'd think. She's not very tall, but that's alright. She's got these nice, thick legs... best rack you've ever seen."

"Jax-"

"Dark brown eyes, big as windows. And... she's got freckles all over her cheeks."

I stopped breathing and looked at him, surprised as all hell. I could feel my cheeks growing warmer, my heartbeat was through the roof. He couldn't look at me anymore, probably more embarrassed than I was.

"And her hair. No one really seems to call her by her real name cause of how beautiful it is. They all call her some variation of 'Ginger'. I like to call her... Red."

He looked at me hard. I didn't know what to say.

"Jax... what do you want from me?"

He looked down at his hands. "Good question," he responded quietly.

Honestly, I'd had enough. His mood swings were enough to make any girl's head spin, not to mention his gang affiliations and apparent obsession with violence. How dark must you be inside to associate yourself constantly with characters such as Jesse, to willingly put yourself in a position to be ground to a pulp every single day?

Why was no one taking care of him, looking out for him?

How was it that he'd gotten that far in life not knowing how to treat people?

"In that case, I'll be going."

I got to my feet, but he got there quicker. He stood in my path, wearing an expression that could've been remorse- I don't know, I was probably seeing things.

"I've missed you, Red. Don't go."

And just like that I was frozen to my spot, waiting for him to go on.

"Oh yeah? I can't tell."

He sighed again and looked at his feet. "I'm sorry about the other night. You just... you said some things I wasn't really expecting to hear. Things I... I don't deserve to hear from a girl like you."

I scoffed and crossed my arms. "Yeah? I thought I was just a whore, remember?"

"Stop," he said harshly. "You know I didn't mean that, not at all."

"How am I supposed to know, Jax?" I snapped, rasing my voice a little and stepping closer. "You do a complete 180 every time I talk to you! One day you like me, one day you don't! You've gotta pick a side here, 'cause I'm really about ready to call it quits!"

"God Red," he retorted, turning away a little with his arms crossed.

His eyes were so conflicted as they took in the landscape around him. I forgot about my anger for a few seconds, just long enough to wonder what he was thinking.

"I wish I could make you understand. I can't just... feel like you."

"Sure you can," I said in a considerably softer tone. "It's not hard. But until you... figure yourself out, figure out what the hell you want... I'm outta here."

I brushed past and he quickly grabbed my wrist.

"Wait."

I turned and glared at him again. "What, Jax? What could you possibly say to make me come back to you?"

His lips pressed themselves into a thin line. "I have to show you something." He didn't let go of my wrist and began to lead me toward the front of the building. I tried to slip out of his grip, but his fingers were like steel.

"Jax, what the hell?!"

"Shut up," he told me somewhat softly.

I let him lead me to a rust-eaten old hearse parked along the curb. I watch skeptically as he walked around to the driver's side, pulling a key fob from his pocket.

"Get in, Red."

I gape at him.

"Please."

"You driving a fucking hearse? Could you be any more morbid?"

He just looked at me, so I huffed and carefully got into the hearse. I kept my eyes glued to the door handle the entire drive, refusing to look in the back. I don't know why, I'm sure it was empty... without the dead bodies of the street toughs he beats every day...

When we got to his place, he lead me into the bedroom again.

"There is no way I'm having sex with you."

He looked at me irritably. "I didn't bring you here for that."

I crossed my arms as he went to the closet, opening the door wide. I remained silent as he removed what looked like an eisel, complete with white paper and paints. He set the eisel in the corner and removed the pad of paper, motioning for me to come sit with him on the bed.

I was tired of protesting, and kinda curious, so I went along with it.

"I paint," he said quietly.

"I know."

"Girls. I always loved to paint girls. But there's one girl who I love to paint the most."

His eyes fell shut, he took a deep breath before revealing what was on the pad of paper.

"Oh my god," I gasped, placing a hand over my mouth.

She was splayed out over a bed, portrayed in vivid watercolor. Her arms laid carefully above her head, among her curly locks of hair. Her breasts were exposed but the rest of her body was cloaked by a blanket, nothing but the silhouette poking through. Her lips were parted and her eyes were closed.

I was beautiful.

"That's not the only one."

He flipped the page and showed me more. What was even better was that I was clothed in most of them-- he thought of me for more than just the 'beauty' of my naked body.

"You're a good painter," I whispered hoarsely.

He nodded, searching my eyes for a reaction. "You're a good model."

"But I... I never..."

He slid off the bed and got to his knees before me, enclosing my hands in his large ones. His eyes were dark and serious- I could hardly tell his rich brown irises from his pupils.

"What if I told you I was willing to let everyone else go?"

"What?"

He took a deep breath and shut his eyes, as if this was all too much to take in.

"If I said I wouldn't fuck anyone else, and you said you wouldn't either. Or kiss anyone, or anything physical. Just with each other. Would you agree to that?"

I could hardly believe what I was hearing.

"Are you serious?"

"Yes."

I took that with a grain of salt. Surely the unpredictable tides that were his moods would swing out of my favor, and the next morning he'd be calling me a whore again or kicking me out of his meager house through the window.

I scoffed internally.

"Alright, Michael. I can agree to that. You're the only one I've ever been with anyway."

Suddenly, my mind revisited the time Jon kissed me. Embarrassment rushed through me, so I quickly shoved that memory back down into the dark hole it came from.

He gave me something like a smile, and stood again.

"Good."

He began to unbutton his shirt.

I wanted to tell him to slow down, but that was before I looked up at his face. Those eyes were trained on me, like they'd never been before, riddled with emotion. Real emotion-- something he'd never bothered with before.

It was like he was a jeweler and I was his finest diamond.

He was smiling.

He reached for my shirt, and I had an epiphany.

"No," I said somewhat forcefully, standing quickly and putting a hand against his chest. "Let me."

I pushed him gently into a seated position on the bed, watching his pupils dilate with desire as I slowly stripped down to nothing but my warm skin. Jon's advice echoed in my head as I crawled onto his lap, straddling him as I looked deeply into his eyes. I'd be in control now.

"Damn woman," he moaned as I suckled his jawbone. "Where'd you learn this?"

So I let him in once more, fully aware of the pain I'd feel when things inevitably went back to normal that day. In those precious moments, I focused on the immense pleasure he was giving me.

{...}

I left the reassuring warmth that was Michael's bed, pushing from my mind the passion and pleasure that had just ensued. I wanted nothing more than to stay in his embrace-- he actually made a face when I got up-- but I knew the drill. I wasn't gonna throw everything away right after I'd just gotten it back.

I began to put my jeans back on.

"Red, where are you going?" he whined, like a child behind told 'no'. He must've really liked not having to do all of the work for once- god knows I liked it.

I looked at him like he'd just grown a second head. "Home... what are you talking about?"

He frowned deeply as I put my Van Halen t-shirt back on over my head, glancing in the mirror and brushing my hair with my fingers. Couldn't come home with bed-head without my mom suspecting something.

"Oh," he said simply.

I went to the bedroom door.

"Red wait. Come here."

Slowly I went to the bed, hoping that this wasn't the part when he'd laugh in my face for being so gullible and easy, telling me never to show up here again.

"Come here," he said again when I stood at the edge of the bed looking down at his partially naked body. The damp sheet was thrown over his lower half.

"I am here," I remarked impatiently.

He rolled his eyes and sat up.

And he kissed me.

I was extremely taken aback. We'd kissed before, sure, but only in moments of passion. Never outside the bedroom had we exchanged the gesture. He only used it as a means of expressing his arousal to me.

But this kiss was different. It was soft and gentle, causing emotion to stir all throughout my body. When he pulled away, I wanted more.

His thumb trailed along my cheek as he pulled away. "See you at school tomorrow?"

"Definitely," I breathed.

I went straight home after that, completely unaware of the light that was quickly consuming me whole. I couldn't stop smiling, I skipped down my street with nothing but sunshine radiating from every pore.

I didn't even stop when a sullen-looking Jon appeared in my bedroom, complaining that I'd stood him up at the Bay earlier.

"Sorry," I said dreamily, while he complained about the twenty dollar bill.

"What's with you, Sally Sunshine?" he asked skeptically. "You were like a fucking zombie this morning."

"Something amazing has happened!" I exclaimed, patting the spot beside me on the bed.

I gushed the whole story, with hand gestures and all, even the part where I adapted his sexual strategies, which totally worked. He sat stoically during the entire thing, nodding a little and smiling. I expected some sort of distaste from him, but he revealed none.

"I'm happy for you," he said somewhat genuinely when I was finished. "I just want you to be happy."

We didn't talk of it anymore. Somehow, I didn't wanna put him through it. Instead we went on listening to music and doing air guitars, like usual.

{...}

I walked down the hall the next morning with nothing but anticipation and anxiety brewing in my chest. I knew the pain was coming, the bliss that had ensued the night before was about to be crushed by Jax's cruel nature.

I was dreading seeing him, and at the same time I was excited. When I spotted him staring at me in the hall I looked away quickly, too scared to hold his gaze.

Jon walked beside me and said nothing. We continued to pass.

"Red."

I froze up, fear panging through me. The whole hall seemed to quiet, everyone stopping to watch what they think will be another inevitable conflict.

"What?" I swallowed, my mouth as dry as a desert.

He looked at me like I was crazy. "What do you mean 'what?' Where are you going so fast anyway? Just come here."

Danny's eyes widened. The Twins looked on, seeming pleased. Vick rolled her eyes, not even bothering to glare at Jon. She shut her locker dramatically and stalked off.

I looked back at Jon.

He nodded his approval, which strangely meant a lot to me.

I went to Jax slowly and time seemed to resume again. No one was interested if there wasn't anymore graphic conflict.

I gasped as he took me into his arms, nestling into my hair and breathing in deeply. "Don't you remember what we agreed on yesterday?"

"Yeah, but I didn't think you meant-"

"You'll be my... Queen," he said simply, pulling away from the hug and planting a swift kiss on my lips.

"Oh."

He wrapped his arm around my waist.

"Come on," he nodded to Danny and the Twins. "We'll be late for Chem."

We walked down the hall, the entire group of us, shoulder to shoulder. It was as if this is what we'd been doing for years. It felt so natural and good, but at the same time it was forgein to me. I gazed up at Jax with a dreamy smile, which he returned. Somewhat-- his smiles always seemed like grimaces.

{A/N}

I wonder how long it'll last. Huh.

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