Updated 12/13/24

"I can't believe how stupid I am," Fiji said, louder than she meant to, as several countries turned to look at her.

"What does that mean Fiji?" El Salvador asked.

"It means I knew about America's territories; obviously, anyone who didn't is an idiot, but I'm just realizing how many times they probably mentioned the states without me realizing," Fiji explained. She had met them. They had helped her move her son into Hawaiʻi's house in The Land Inbetween, promising to care for him like one of their own.

Had one of those territories been a state, and she just hadn't realized it, so convinced they weren't personified that it must have been a territory?

"Well, now I feel like an idiot, too," Zimbabwe said.

"Wait, how many of you knew about the American territories?" Slovenia asked.

"Anyone who knows territories are personified, which should be all of you." South Korea said. Chile groaned.

"Chile's realizing he's an idiot, isn't he?" Belize said. Colombia let out an amused snort.

"He's always been an idiot," Colombia said.

"How did you not know about America's territories? How many of you didn't realize America's territories were personified?" Laos asked. Many countries raised their hands, mainly from Europe or countries that had been born in the 21st century.

That made sense. Those guys were much younger and probably didn't even realize America had territories. Most countries with territories were colonial powers, and many countries seemed to have forgotten or didn't even know that America had been a colonial power himself.

Well, they knew he was an empire, but there were many empires that didn't go the route of having kids with every personification they came across.

"I didn't even realize America had territories," Czechia said, trying to defend herself. Fiji smiled, happy that her prediction as to why some countries didn't realize America's territories were personified was correct.

"Don't worry, neither do half of America's people. If I have to see the new say 'Puerto Rican immigrants' one more time, I'm going to....going to...I don't know exactly want I'll do, but I will be fucking pissed." James said.

"Do your people not know you have territories? Mozambique asked. James sighed.

"Some of them. It's very annoying," James said, looking exasperated.

"WAIT DANISH WEST INDIES IS ALIVE?" Denmark exclaimed, slamming her hands on the table. James sighed again, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Yes, Denmark, she is." he deadpanned. Fiji had never heard him sound so done before.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Denmark accused.

"I thought you knew! You had colonies Denmark—you still do! I thought you would have realized that she survived when your colony became America's! No one ever even lied or said she had died!" James argued back. Denmark sputtered, probably trying to come up with a counterargument.

Fiji sighed. This family had too much drama. It was annoying, but at least she got free entertainment out of it.

"Also, her name is Virgin Islands of the United States. Most people call her the US Virgin Islands or the American Virgin Islands. You can just call her Vee, though, unless you want to be like United Nations and torture yourself by saying everyone's incredibly long names." James said, smiling softly, "She does still talk about you."

"Virgin Islands?" Chile asked amusement in his voice.

"It was your ancestors who gave her and British Virgin Islands that name." James protested, looking annoyed.

"That's because no one ever wanted to have sex with Spanish Empire," Belgium said loudly, causing snickers to break out across the room.

"Virgin Bitch!" Someone called, although Fiji couldn't tell who. Probably a descent of one of his colonies. They never hesitated to drag his name through the mud, even if it was allegedly New Spain that was worse.

"Well, I hate my ancestors," Chile said, moving on from that conversation.

"Don't worry, we all do," France said, causing a round of snickers.

"So does Vee. But at least her islands aren't called 'Santa Úrsula y las Once Mil Vírgenes' anymore. Because that name is much worse." James said.

"Eleven thousand....what the fuck was wrong with Spanish Empire?" Paraguay asked. James shrugged.

"You're asking the wrong person there," he responded. "I don't understand you countrypeople."

Paraguay groaned, putting his head on the table.

"What do you mean eleven thousand?" Nigeria asked.

"'Santa Úrsula y las Once Mil Vírgenes means Saint Ursula and the eleven thousand virgins," James answered.

"You know Spanish?" Spain asked. James looked offended at that.

"Of course, I know Spanish. A large portion of America's population speaks Spanish, so I thought it was best to learn. Besides, America doesn't even have an official language, so I don't know why everyone gets so worked up over that," James said, sounding more annoyed than before.

America didn't have an official language? Fiji wondered how he handled that. Australia had told her several stories about how not having an official language has messed him up when he's trying to do something. Fiji had never seen America give much of an indication that he could speak any languages other than English and French.

Of course, they weren't close, so she could have missed any signs.

"I thought English was America's official language?" Britain asked.

"It's not!" James said, throwing his hands in the air, "Why does everyone always think America's official language is English?!"

"Because you only speak English, Uncle James," Marshall Islands said, causing James to flip him off.

"That's because everyone speaks English! It's the Lingua franca!" James protested.

"Yeah, it's not America's fault a lot of the system only speaks English," Ireland added.

"You said that the states also had a role in you keeping everything secret. Can you explain how that worked?" Canada asked, interrupting the conversation. His voice was pleasant and nice, but Fiji had known her brother for long enough to see the other emotions that lurked in his eyes.

Anger. Betrayal. Sadness.

Fiji hated family drama. But she had a feeling this was going to turn into one of the biggest family conflicts since Father almost beat her son to death.

Fiji sighed and began to mentally prepare herself for the storm that was about to come.