"Grabe, ex din 'yon ni Martell? In fairness sa kaniya ha, may taste siya sa pagpili," ani Babes sabay sumulyap sa kay Irene na ngayon ay nakatingin din sa aming dalawa. "Maganda rin sana 'yang Irene na 'yan kaso ang sahol ng ugali."

Patuloy kaming nagkuwentuhan ni Babes at ang tinopiko pa talaga namin ay tungkol sa mga "type" raw ni Martell.

"Mahilig siya sa mga modelo," ani pa ni Babes at napangisi na lang ako. "Magka-rhyme din ang mga pangalan ninyo. Axyne. Maliaxinne. Irene."

Bago pa ako makasagot ay dumating na rin si Martell kasama ang iilan niyang mga staffs. Tinawag siya ni Irene pero hindi niya yata narinig dahil nang makita kami ni Babes sa isang sulok ay sa amin siya dumiretso.

Sabay kaming tatlo nina Babes at Martell na pumasok sa opisina ni Martell. Gusto kong magkamabutihan ang dalawa kaya ipinakilala ko sila sa isa't isa. Natawa pa ako dahil hindi makapaniwala si Babes na nagselos si Martell sa kaniya.

"Sana sinabihan mo siyang mas bet ko siya kaysa sa 'yo," bulong ni Babes.

Hindi na rin naman nagtagal si Babes dahil may pinagawa pa ako sa kaniya. Ako naman, nag-iisip ng paraan kung paano ko sasabihin kay Martell ang tungkol sa pananakot ni Irene at sa ipinakita niya kanina.

"Irene is outside," panimula ko.

"Ah..." he replied, trying to sound enthusiastic but failed. I think he's more interested in leaving marks on my neck than to what I'm saying.

"Martell, this is important," giit ko, pilit na kino-control ang sarili na huwag magpadala sa kaniyng mga halik. Ayaw kong sirain iyong napag-usapan namin.

"I'm listening," aniya pero patuloy pa rin sa paghalik sa leeg ko. Kalalabas lang ni Babes at nilalandi niya na agad ako.

Napailing na lang ako at umalis sa pagkakaupo sa kaniyang kandungan. I faced him with my arms crossed, an amused look then played on his face. It seems to me that he's not taking me seriously.

"Hey! This is me trying our 'no more secrets' agreement!" I said with a pout. Pinanliitan ko siya ng mga mata pero nginitian lang ako ng loko sabay tayo.

Nanlalambing niyang ipinalibot ang mga braso sa aking baywang at hinalikan ang aking noo. "What is it, Axyne?"

I heaved a deep sigh before telling him what Irene told me and showed me earlier. He was pursing his lips when I finished with his worried look on me.

"Are you worried?" He asked while I immediately shook my head. I am surprisingly calm which is quite a shock for me since I know that I should be panicky right now. "Good. Don't be, I'll take care of it."

Tumango ako at saka ipinalibot ang mga braso sa kaniyang baywang. I feel safe and snug in his arms and even in the midst of what can be a threat to my semi-peaceful life, it's not that hard for me to trust. The thought that he's here with me and we'll face this together is enough to overpower the worry-inducing thoughts that are attempting to cloud my mind.

Naramdaman ko ang malambot niyang labi na dumapo sa aking noo. Tumingala ako sa kaniya at nakitang parang malalim siyang nag-iisip.

Nanatili ako sa kaniyang opisina buong araw at sabay kaming naghapunan sa labas. Nang pauwi kami ay tumawag si Babes at nabitawan ko pa ang phone dahil sa gulat.

"My parents want to meet with me," I said, trying not to quaver, then bringing my eyes to Martell who's focused on the road. His hand was on the steering wheel while the other reached out to mine's and held it tightly, then glancing at me.

"It's okay if you don't want to meet them," he said reassuringly while his thumb was caressing my hand. His small gesture eased me and I was able to think.

"They're still my parents, though," I whispered, trying to convince myself to see them. I haven't seen them for a long time and the last time we've seen each other was during my college graduation but they didn't stay long. Si Mama Celestina ang sumama sa akin na umakyat sa stage dahil hindi pa nga nakakapagsimula ang program ay kinailangan na ng mga magulang na umalis.

Iyon ang laman ng isipan ko hanggang pagkabukas. Hindi iyon maalis sa isipan ko kaya sinabihan ko na lang si Babes na sabihan ang mga magulang ko na makikipagkita ako sa kanila. Gusto ko na ring matapos ito para wala na akong aalahanin pa.

"Are you sure that you don't want me to come?" Paniniguradong tanong ni Martell at saka dinala ang kamay sa aking noo at parang minasahe iyon. "You'll have wrinkles if you keep on furrowing like this," aniya pa at patuloy na minasahe ang aking noo.

I smiled wryly at him before resting my head on his chest. I hugged him tight until I was contented. I like doing so since it feels like I'm being recharged. There's something with being in his embrace that gives me immense comfort.

He drove me to the restaurant where my parents and I are gonna meet. He kissed me goodbye and wished me luck. I waved at him before keeping my head high and confidently strode towards the restaurant even though my insides are panicking.

Only Gemini's mother was there. Akala ko magkasama sila ni dad pero magkaiba raw sila ng flight kaya baka male-late ito.

"Your father's a bit ashamed in coming here," aniya at hilaw akong nginitian. "I think he just realized that what he did to you was... terrible..." she said with almost a shiver as if the thought of what happened is too much for her.

Tinanguan ko siya at saka itinuon ang atensyon sa mga pagkain. Hindi ko alam kung ano ang dapat kong isasagot kaya nanahimik na lang ako. Paminsan-minsan, kung natatandaan ko ang nangyari ay parang nawawalan ako ng lakas at nararamdaman ko ang intensidad ng paghampas ng ama.

"I'm sorry, Gazella," she said, breaking the silence enveloping us in this private dining room she booked. I thought some bit of privacy would do us good but now, I think it would've been better if we're outside. At least, there wouldn't be any awkward silences.

"We're useless parents, I know—"

"I'm not your child so I understand," I cut her off. I want to skip the pity-party part since I feel like I've had enough of such already.

"But... well, how about the mother your best friend? You're not her child too but..." she trailed off, it was as if she's stuggling to find the right words.

"Don't compare yourself to Mama Celestina," I said with a sigh. "She cared for me willingly but as for you, I'm just a physical manifestation of how your husband cheated on you."

Mabilis kong tinapos ang pagkain at saka tumayo. Hindi ko alam kung dapat ba akong matuwa na hindi na umaakto ang ina ni Gemini na parang evil stepmother.

"I'm leaving," pagpapaalam ko sabay tayo at saka pilit na ngumiti.

"Gazella," tawag niya bago pa ako makatalikod. "It's not your fault and you know that." Natigil ako at naestatwa sa kinatatayuan. Ito ang unang beses na nagsalita siya tungkol kay Gemini.

"She was in pain, I could see it," aniya ulit, may bahid ng kalungkutan ang kaniyang boses. "But her eyes speaks happiness and I know it's because of you and well... your other sister..."

Dinala ko ang naluluhang mga mata sa kaniya at binigyan siya ng maliit na ngiti. Iyon lang ang kaya ko sa ngayon.

"Thank you for making the last moments of my daughter's life memorable."

I nodded at her once more before turning my back to leave. And while I was on my way out, I bumped with my dad. He looked at me with a surprised look before he was able to bring himself to speak.

I don't know what came into my mind but I went back to the private dining room with him when he asked me to. He said he wanted to catch up with me which is really weird considering the fact that we barely talk since then unless it's about my allowance or tuition.

I guess the thought that this is another baggage from the past that I'd like to let go was able to persuade me into giving my relationship with my parents another chance. I mean... if Martell was able to forgive me, I guess I can do the same with my parents.

Even though holding on to the grudges seem to make me feel all powerful and strong, it's actually the one that's sucking up my energy. If I want to move forward, then it should only not be one baggage that I have to let go. It has to be everything from the past that's no longer serving me and that includes this strained relationship and subtle bad-blood with my parents.

"So, did it go well?" Martell asked in a concerned voice, then encircling his arms on my waist and pulled me closer to him. Talking before we sleep is now part of our routine. This is the part where we tell how our day went.

I nodded and chose to snuggle in his arms instead of giving the details. His hand was caressing my cheek and his eyes were focused on that part too. I got curious as to why he's intently looking at that side, then suddenly realizing that he might be seeing the small scar on my face.

"Is this why you flinched when I raised a hand to wipe your face?" Nanghihina at namamaos niyang tanong habang ang mga mata ay nakatuon pa rin sa aking pisngi. "Is this why you thought I was gonna lay a hand on you?" His eyes met mine's and I could see a combination of worry and lividness in them.

"Yeah... it was dad," I said, braving myself to share to him about that certain incident I kept solely to myself. I didn't tell my friends about the "hitting" part because I know that their worry for me that time was more than enough already. I didn't had the heart to give them another thing to worry about.

"He had a ring so it left both a bruise and a cut," I continued, a smile forming on my face as the memory of what happened came flashing in my mind.

"It was when I came back to the Philippines. Mama Celestina drove me to our house and she's the one who explained to my parents about my pregnancy and everything that happened after that. I thought Mama Celestina's help saved me from another set of pain but just after she left, dad came to my room and well... next thing I know, my face was starting to get numb as I saw droplets of blood cascading down my cheeks."

Napakagat-labi ako. Hindi ko alam kung paano ko iyon nalampasan nang mag-isa. Literal na mag-isa ako noong mga panahon na iyon dahil ang ina ni Gemini ay sumama kay Inigo para makasama si Ari. Si dad naman, hindi ko alam. Ang alam ko lang ay naiwan akong mag-isa sa bahay dahil pati ang mga kasambahay ay pinabakasyon ni dad. Iyon daw ang parusa ko sa pagiging pabaya.

"What's with the smirk, Axyne?" Ani Martell at seryoso akong tinitigan, mukhang naguguluhan pa sa inaasta ko.

I shook my head. "Nothing, I just realized that my dad punished me for being a bit like him." He said that leaving me on my own is a punishment for being, as what he called it, 'an irresponsible slut'.

Those were the times I threw all the mirror in our house because I couldn't stand seeing my own reflection. Those were the times I couldn't stand being with myself; the times when seeing my reflection made me want to just to puke.

Those were the times when I had to take a shower with the lights off. It wasn't just because of the large and ugly bruise and the long tear on my face, it was also because of the stitch marks when I had the surgery. It was because everything I see and eat reminds me of my mistake.

That was the time when I just wanted to give up. I was all alone and no one knew where I was. My friends thought I took the rest of my classes online so I can recover while still getting educated. Little did they know that I was alone in our house so I can face my punishment.

I could've taken my own life that time. I mean... who knows when dad and Gemini's mother would come back? I could've easily done it but the thought that I owe Martell something — it was that that kept me going. I always reminded myself that I can't die just yet as long as I haven't paid the wrath of Martell. If dad punished me when I didn't directly cause him pain, how much more Martell whom I left without a word?

Naramdaman kong mas humigpit ang pagkakayakap ni Martell. Saka ko lang naramdaman na parang naninigas at nanlalamig pala ang kalooban ko.

"I thought you'd want to punish me too," I admitted. Though feeling numb, I could feel my eyes starting to get watery. "Am I doing a good job in making it up to you? Or do I have to level up my efforts?"

"What are you talking about, Axyne?" Martell asked weakly as he pulled away from the hug to face me. His eyes look weary and hurt. And if I'm not mistaken, there's a hint of unshed tears at the corner of his eyes.

"I won't be able to forgive myself unless I'm sure that you're no longer hurting because of what I did."

"I tell that to myself too," ani Martell at napailing pa sa sarili.

We both sighed and hugged each other again. I felt him place a soft kiss on my forehead as he caressed my hair.

"On the brighter side, at least we don't have to this alone," aniya at parang hinehele ako. "We don't have to do this secretly anymore, Axyne. This time, we have each other."

His words were enough to comfort me. I smiled at him and he did the same, then bringing his lips to my cheeks — to where my scar is, to be exact.

Sandali akong napasinghap at napapikit, dinadama ang malambot niyang labi sa aking pisngi. I'm trying to engrave this exact moment in the depths of my mind so that when I'd feel anxious, I'd have something to combat it with.

"So, how's married life?" Tanong ni Gretchen at saka umupo sa tabi ko. Nahihimigan ko ang panunukso sa kaniyang boses pero seryoso naman ang mukha. Pinanliitan ko siya ng mata dahil nagdududa ako sa kapatid.

"Secret," sabi ko sabay kibit-balikat at saka humiga sa kaniyang hita. "I have this Twitter follower, user 'gazelluv-axyne', I miss her," pagbago ko ng usapan.

Sasama dapat ako kay Martell sa kaniyang trabaho ngunit nang paalis kami ay biglang dumating si Gretchen kaya nagpaiwan ako. Magkikita naman kami ni Martell mamaya dahil magde-date raw kami.

Natawa pa nga ako dahil hindi ko naman inasahan na mag-aaya siyang mag-date. Malay ko namang nagde-date pa rin pala ang mga mag-asawa. At isa pa, hindi naman kasi ito parang normal na kasal.

"Oh, you didn't know?" Ani Gretchen at mangha akong tinitigan. Bigla akong naintriga kaya napabangon ako. "It's Gemini."

Umawang ang labi ko dahil sa narinig. Hindi ko kailanman naisipan na ang kapatid pala ang nasa likod ng account na iyon. "Gemini?!"

Gretchen smiled fondly at me before pulling me into a hug. "Let's play dress-up," pag-aaya niya.

Tumaas ang kilay ko sa narinig. Hindi ko alam kung ano ang topak ng kapatid at naisipan pang mag-aya na maglaro. At dahil wala naman akong gagawin, umoo na lang ako.

May tinawagan ang kapatid at hindi nagtagal ay may nagsidatingan na mga damit, sapatos at alahas. Bago pa ako makapagtanong ay nagkibit-balikat lang ang kapatid at saka ako pinapili ng kung ano-anong mga damit.

Nawala na sa isipan ko ang pagtatanong dahil nagkuwentuhan na kami tungkol kay Gemini. Pinabasa ko rin sa kaniya ang mga tweets ni Gemini.

While trying on different outfits, the both us were playing truth or dare. So far, she didn't dare me anything embarrassing.

"I dare you to wear that to your date," Gretchen said with a smirk and gestured to my dress.

"What? No!" Mabilis kong pagtanggi. Hindi sa ayaw ko ang suot kong 'to dahil gustong-gusto ko nga ito at nagmistulang ligaw na prinsesa ako ngunit hindi naman ito magbabagay sa pupuntahan namin ni Martell.

I have no idea where we'll have our "date" but I'm pretty sure that wherever he'll take me, this gown I'm wearing would still be so extra.

The dress is from Milena's latest collection and the couture's theme is revolving around this vintage princess vibe which my sisters and I have been fans of.

I stared at my reflection and admired Milena's work. The tulle and lace dress is blush in color and has this dramatic bell-sleeves. This is the kind of dress I'd want to wear running through a castle's hallway.

Gretchen put on some light makeup on my face and braided the top part of my hair, then curling the remaining ones. Now I look like I came straight from a vintage romance book.

"I'm not wearing this to our date," sabi ko sa kapatid at natatawang kinuha ang pamalit na damit. Hindi maipinta ang hitsura ni Gretchen.

Mabilis niyang inagaw ang pamalit kong damit at saka hinarangan ang pintuan ng kwarto. "You're wearing that and you'll thank me later."

Bago pa ako makaangal ay nilagay niya ang isang daliri sa aking bibig para pigilan akong magsalita. She gestured towards the door before holding my wrist and pulling me out.

Medyo nahiya pa ako dahil sa kagaraan ng suot. It didn't help when a classic Corvette pulled up in front of us with Martell in it.

He was wearing a dark brown pants, a white-button shirt with its expected first-two buttons opened, and sleeves folded just below his elbows, and a pair of suspenders. He's also wearing a newsboy hat which honestly made him look like he's part of Tom Sawyer's squad.

I just then realized that both of our outfits seem to match. I turned to Gretchen who was now looking at Martell with a triumphant grin before turning to me with her innocent face back on.

"Did you two plan this?" Tinaasan ko ng kilay ang kapatid pero nagngiting aso lang siya. Napatingin ako kay Martell at nakangiti lang din ang loko, mukhang natutuwa pa dahil sa gulat ko.

"You're welcome," mabilis na sagot ni Gretchen at binuksan na ang sasakyan at pinapasok ako.

Hindi na ako umangal at umupo na sa tabi ni Martell. Pang-dalawahan lang ang sasakyan at napakagara niyon. Kahit nasa siyudad kami ay sa tingin ko parang bumalik kami ng panahon o 'di kaya'y pumasok sa mga nabasa kong libro.

Pinili kong huwag itali ang mga buhok para mas damang-dama ko ang hangin. Nararamdaman ko ang paminsan-minsang pagsulyap ni Martell sa akin na nakangiti.

Hindi ko alam kung saan ang punta namin pero na-e-excite na ako. Pagkatapos ng ilang oras na pagda-drive ay tumigil siya sa harap ng isang malawak na bakanteng kalupaan.

Sandali pa akong natulala at pilit na iniisip kung ano ang gagawin namin dito. Nauna siyang lumabas at habang nakatunganga ako ay naglakad siya papunta sa banda ko at pinagbuksan ako ng pinto.

Pinasadahan ko siya ng tingin, hindi mapigilang makaramdam ng kung anong nakakabaliw na kilig. Sandali ko pang kinumbinsi ang sarili na matanda na ako para sa mga kilig-kilig na 'yan ngunit hindi yata maalis ang tingin ko sa kay Martell kaya lalo pang nadadagdagan ang intensidad ng nararamdaman.

Ngumisi na lang ako para maitago ang nararamdaman. Nakakahiya naman siguro na kinikilig-kilig pa ako ngayong lampas na ako sa stage na 'yon.

Martell tilted his head with a small smile, it was if he's trying to read through me. Nakakabaliw ang epekto niya sa akin. Hindi ko alam kung ba't parang tuwang-tuwa ako ngayon lalo na't may parte pa ng isipan ko na ayaw akong maging masaya.

Hindi ko na napigilan ang mga ngiti at hinayaan na lang ang sarili kahit nagmumukha na akong baliw sa kangingiti.

Martell offered a hand before pulling me towards the gate. He pushed it open and we continued to walk, the grassland going steeper as we did. I stopped abruptly when I felt like we reached the topmost part.

The sight of a towering and fairytale-looking castle greeted us. I felt my mouth gaping open as my eyes went back and forth from Martell and to the castle. I wanted to say something but I was too speechless because of this overwhelming feeling forming inside me.

Inakbayan ako ni Martell at ginawaran ng halik ang aking noo. "You don't have to say something," aniya at saka ako nginitian bago ulit naglahad ng kamay.

Pumasok kami roon at naglibot-libot. Suportado niya ako sa mga kaartehan ko at tuwang-tuwa pa noong tumakbo ako sa mga pasilyo at pababa ng grand staircase. I honestly felt like a runaway betrothed princess when I did so.

"I feel like I'm in one of those fairytale books," pag-amin ko kahit alam ko namang nahalata niya na iyon.

We both looked at each other at the same time, our eyes locking for a moment before I hugged him from the side. He placed an arm around my shoulders and messed with my hair as we walked towards the back part of the castle.

I thought seeing the castle earlier and getting to run dramatically in the hallways and down the grand staircase was the most fairytale-like experience I ever had.

"We're having a picnic?" Tanong ko kahit obvious naman na iyon ang gagawin namin.

A wide cloth was settled on top of the perfectly manicured lawn. It was situated under a large tree and was covered by its shadow from the glares of the sun. There were a variety of cakes, fruits, breads, and pastries that I'm unaware of. I also saw a few bottles of champagnes and wines in one of the baskets and in the other, there were freshly-looking flowers.

Pumuwesto kami ni Martell doon at sa puno kami sumandal. Nakaakbay siya sa akin habang nakasandal ang ulo ko sa kaniyang balikat.

Pinili naming huwag munang kumain dahil mukhang katulad ko ay mas gusto niya ring langhapin ang kapayapaan ng nanggagayumang lugar na 'to.

"Thank you," I whispered. I felt him relax even more, his hand now caressing my shoulder.

"Are you happy?" Tanong niya kaya napatingin ako sa kaniya.

I smiled. "Surprisingly, I am," I admitted.

What I'm feeling right now is weird. There's no hint of misery and guilt residing in me. It feels weird because the usual dreadful feeling and destructive thoughts are nowhere to be found. It's surprising that my mind isn't reminding me of what happened in our past.

I know and acknowledge that my life isn't perfect but even so, I still feel at peace. I feel hopeful even though I don't know what the future holds and it's odd because this is not the kind of mindset and life I have been living with in the past years.

It's like suddenly and finally... I'm starting to feel like my old self again. It's like I'm finally not longing for the Galaxy who had been unhurt and at peace — the Galaxy before all the secret heartbreaks.

It's like right now, everything's starting to make sense. I'm no longer missing my old self because even with all these uncertainties and heartbreaks, my mind and myself both acknowledge the fact that I cannot be whom I used to be.

There's no need for me to want to be the Galaxy before I met Martell because right now, this Galaxy right here, even after all the heartbreaks, is better than that Galaxy who never knew what's more to life.

At some point, a part of me wished that I should've refused to be part of that exchange program. It all started there; it all started when I went to a foreign land where I then met what I thought was my greatest downfall.

I thought I would've been in a better place if I didn't experience all these heartbreaks. But now, it's starting to get clearer.

The person that I am right now is undoubtedly better than the person I was years ago. Ilang beses man akong nagkamali, natumba at nasaktan, heto ako at nagpapatuloy pa rin.

I thought that if I didn't accept to be part of the program, I'd have a more peaceful life because... well... the heartbreaks wouldn't have taken place. But now that I'm thinking about this, if I'd be given the chance to make a different decision, I'd still choose the same ones. Because if it weren't for all those decisions and choices, I wouldn't be here... I wouldn't be with Martell.

Maybe I would've experienced lesser heartbreaks. But what will I do with such life when there's no Martell who makes the ordinary day extraordinary? When there's no Martell who makes the hard times tolerable? When there's no Martell who makes the mundane seem so special?

"I am, too," he replied with a smile. It's the same smile who can effortlessly make my heart thump loudly and crazily.

We were silent for a moment before he spoke again. "Do you think we're going too fast? Rushing into things?"

Nagkibit-balikat ako. "I honestly don't know," pag-amin ko. "Maybe, maybe not. All I know is that I won't be this peaceful if my heart and mind are debating whether this is right or not."

Napangiti ako nang makitaan ng kaunting pagkalito ang kaniyang mga mata. "It's not all the time that what I'm feeling and what I'm thinking don't clash."

Napatango siya at saka mas inilapit ako sa kaniya at mahigpit akong niyakap. Umalis ako sa puwesto at patalikod na pumosisyon sa harap niya. Sumandal ako sa kaniyang dibdib habang ang mga kamay niya ay nakapalibot na sa aking baywang.

"I tricked you into marriage," he said guiltily. "The whole inheritance thing is real but that isn't the reason why..."

I removed his hold from me so I could face him, then running a hand through his hair. "And I said yes even though I still owed you something."

Sandali kaming nagkatinginan bago siya napailing-iling. "I think we both had our fair share of selfishness at some point."

I smiled, feeling weird again that I could think of my past decisions without the destructive guilt clouding my mind. "Yeah... those decisions make us feel bad but we can do better, right?"

He nodded with a smile, then placing a hand on my nape, slightly pushing my head towards him before he placed a soft kiss on my forehead. "There's always hope, Axyne."

"I mean, we can't just stop now, right?" He added. "We got this far already. All that has happened and all the decisions and mistakes led us to this."

"We can always start over, right? It's not like we're starting from scratch... we're starting again but this time, we have the experiences, realizations and lessons to guide us."

"Yeah..." I said with a nod. "And this time, we're together on this one. Today can be a beginning of something better. It's just up to us to decide."

He nodded, then sighing contentedly before enveloping me in a warm embrace.

"Do you think this is a right way to this new beginning of ours?" Aniya kaya kinalas ko ang yakap para malaman ang tinutukoy niya.

Bago pa ako makapagtanong ay may kinuha siyang maliit na kahon mula sa kaniyang bulsa. Nagtama ang aming mga mata at napangiti pa siya, mukhang natutuwa na nagugulat ako.

He swallowed hard, his eyes still not leaving mine's as he opened the velvet box, the radiantly gleaming gem getting my attention.

"Not an invitation to a marriage for convenience that has something to do with inheritance," he spoke. "And no more excess baggage and emotional affliction from the past."

Naluluha akong tumango at mabilis siyang niyakap. I thought I had enough surprises for today but he keeps on dropping bombshells that are increasing in the amount of surprise it gives me.

"Is this just to seal off this 'new beginning' or are we..." I trailed off, suddenly feeling too overwhelmed to speak. It's the good kind of overwhelm. The kind of overwhelming that makes my chest feel like it's glowing and is about to burst because of these mixed emotions.

"If you're asking whether we're gonna have another wedding, I want to say yes, of course," aniya, nahulaan ang gusto kong itanong. "But then, it's something we have to decide together."

I nodded while biting my lips, my eyes then darting back to my hand — to my ring finger to be exact. I raised my hand once again to admire the ring.

"Why did you put a lot of effort into our spur-of-the-moment wedding in Maldives?" Tanong ko. "I mean... given our situation that time..." I trailed off, not wanting to reiterate.

"Well, it's still a wedding," he answered. It was as if that's the most logical explanation he has. "It's a wedding with you, Axyne."

I stared at the papers scattered on my desk, thinking that Sugar would be proud of what I did. Who would've thought that I'd have the patience to write all of these?

Today was so magical that I couldn't resist the idea of writing everything that I can remember. Time flies so fast and I want to be able to go back to this day even just through my writing.

Wala akong problema kung gaano pa kabilis ang daloy ng buhay dahil alam kong masaya na ako sa bawat minuto na naririto ako. Ang klase ng buhay na palagi kong inaasam ang siyang reyalidad ko na.

Finally, after all these years of longing for my fairytale, my life is as enchanting as my imaginations and even better! I don't need to fantasize my fairytale anymore because my life is one already.

I guess, it's not always about glitters and sparkles. Most of the time, a fairytale needs to fall apart and be sprinkled with pitch black in order for the pieces to fall into their right places.

If it wasn't for every heartbreaks I went through, I don't think I'd appreciate this life I have right now.

And sometimes, the people who we think are the antagonist are not the ones who we think they are. Sometimes, we are the antagonists of our own story. It's our fear and doubts and how we deal with them that makes our lives harder than it should be.

But then, this life is also ours. We are also the protagonists of our story. So, it is also up to us if we want to turn our misery into victories; and our trials into triumphs.

But if there's something fairytale related that I'd like to stress is that most of the times, our night in shining armor is not who we expect them to be. If we can be both the protagonist and the antagonist of our story, then we can also be our own hero — our own prince charming.

Awakening and enlightenment doesn't necessarily mean getting a kiss on the lips. Most of the times, all it takes is patting ourselves on the back for going on with the story with courage, and hugging ourselves when our pieces seem to be falling apart.

Sometimes, all it takes is to just keep going until the forest doesn't seem so dark anymore. Until our paths start to unfold and things get clearer and brighter.

I am neither my favorite Disney princess, Cinderella, nor any character at all. Because unlike the ones I read and watched, it wasn't a kiss who woke me up. It wasn't a kiss who healed me and saved me. It was my deliberate choice to choose to continue — regardless of my reasons and situations — that saved me. I had no good motivation to continue but I still chose to do so, so now I'm here.

I'm no longer alone and on my own because finally, I have someone whom I can lean on. Someone whom I can hold onto when I don't have the strength. Someone who can give me hope when things get dark. Someone who can continue to help me save myself from my heartbreaks. Because at the end of the day, no matter how much I try to deny this, it's nice to have someone to share the burden with. It's nice to have someone who can pick me up when I'm too tired in doing so.

No man is an island, they say. Life is better with a companion. Life is bearable with Martell.

"That's a lot of paper, Axyne," Martell said in a whisper while encircling his arms on my waist, his chin now resting on my shoulders.

He showered my shoulders with light, feathery kisses before kissing me goodnight. Aniya na hihintayin niya raw ako para sabay kaming makatulog.

"I'm almost done," I assured, then placing a soft kiss on his lips. Napakagat-labi siya at sandali pang tumaas ang kaniyang kilay at mukhang pinipigilan lang ang sarili na mapangiti.

Nang makaalis si Martell ay saka ko kinuha ang lapis para makapagpatuloy. Patapos na rin naman kasi ako ngunit natagalan lang dahil paulit-ulit kong binabasa ang mga sinusulat at saka ilang minuto akong tumutunganga habang nakangiti na parang baliw.

I remembered the time when Sugar handed me a pen and a paper. We were on a flight back home from States. I was in a wretched state that time. I didn't know what was waiting for me but now, I can finally tell my nineteen year old self that though her dark life made her worried and anxious for the future, everything still worked out for the best.

Finally, she can be at peace. She no longer has to worry. Finally, I can let her go.

I can still remember the last lines I wrote. My hand was shaking and in pain from all the writing, my head was throbbing from all the stress, and my heart felt like it was being crumpled and torn into pieces that time. I can still remember how wet the paper was because of my tears.

But now, I am genuinely glad that I'm writing the total opposite of what I wrote before. I'm glad that I can finally tell a different story.

I heaved a deep, contented sigh, my heart and mind suddenly all feeling light and calm, as I leaned forward to the table.

I am Gazella Axyne Avellana, an avid fan of fairytales and got lucky enough to have one of my own.

This was once my unconventional, not-so-fairytale-like romance story — the story on how I got my heart broken.

But now, this is my favorite story. The one with the angel-looking guy, and the one with my secret heartbreaks.