Inspirational quote: If you ever find yourself in a situation where you're somewhere and you have to memorise a quote from the bible... just say... John 11:35, "Jesus wept".

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Kieran was flummoxed.

Like, genuinely flummoxed.

He didn't believe Dr Kozak at first when he said that he had had a non identical twin brother, but Dr Kozak didn't seem to have been lying about it, he sounded rather serious.

"Wait wait wait. Say that again?" Kieran uttered, staring at Dr Kozak in absolute bewilderment.

"That my long lost sister Tiffany isn't dead and that she cloned herself this whole time and the real her ran away with my non identical twin brother Laurence?"

Kieran blinked in surprise.

Kieran: You have a non identical twin brother called Laurence? Seriously?

Dr Kozak: *rolls his eyes in disbelief* For goodness sake why is everyone surprised that I have a non identical twin brother? Yes, I have a non identical twin brother called Laurence!

Kieran: You've never told me this before!

Dr Kozak: I don't tell you much things, kid.

Kieran: What? So is Laurence like... A doctor or something?

Dr Kozak: *is slightly irritated because he's been through about a million conversations where people have asked him the same thing about Laurence* No. He's a professor. Jeez.

Kieran: Who's older?

Dr Kozak: *stares at him confusingly* We're twins.

Kieran: Yeah but one of you must be older than the other one. Like my siblings, they were triplets and my brother Cameron was born about ten seconds before Susannah and Jessica.

Dr Kozak: Uh.... Laurence is older than me by like two seconds.

Kieran: But why did he run away with your sister Tiffany? How many siblings do you even have?

Dr Kozak: Five. Well four now, Valentina's dead.

Kieran: And you lived with all of them?

Dr Kozak: Yep yep yep.

Kieran: What were all of your siblings' names?

Dr Kozak: *counts on his fingers each time he mentions one of his siblings' names* Well... Let's see. There's me, Tiffany, Jackson, Laurence, Valentina and Elizabeth. Three boys and three girls.

Kieran: Who's the oldest?

Dr Kozak: My mum gave birth to sextuplets.

Kieran: *gasps once he realises what that means* Your mother gave birth to six children on the same day?!

Dr Kozak: Well she was supposed to anyway.

Kieran: What's that supposed to mean?

Dr Kozak: *sighs in frustration because his mother is currently dead and he doesn't like thinking about it* Laurence and I were born first, as twins. Then three months later, my mother became pregnant again and gave birth to Jackson, Elizabeth, Valentina and Tiffany. I guess you could say that Laurence and I were premature babies.

Kieran: I'm really confused though.

Dr Kozak: On what?

Kieran: Why did Tiffany and Laurence run away together?

Dr Kozak: Actually they ran away with my other brother Jackson, who is also miraculously alive again. Basically my father was a serial killer and-

Kieran: *interrupts him halfway* Oh so is that why you're a serial killer?

Dr Kozak: Well, yeah, kinda but I only kill people that deserve to die. My father just killed people for the sake of it.

Kieran: Is your father alive right now?

Dr Kozak: Unfortunately... Yeah. He lives somewhere in Costa Rica.

Kieran: But why did Tiffany, Jackson and Laurence run away?

Dr Kozak: Because they were fed up with my father. They were fed up of him always bickering with my mother. They must have kept some secret to themselves or something because they wouldn't ever tell me, Elizabeth or Valentina what they were up to. And one day, all three of them ran away. They cloned themselves though, so that no one in our family would worry over where all three of them had gotten to. So that just left me, Elizabeth and Valentina at home.

Kieran: And why did your father kill their clones?

Dr Kozak: Because he was annoyed at Tiffany and Jackson over something. So he killed them. No one in our family knew that they had cloned themselves of course, so we all thought that the real Tiffany and Jackson were dead when my father had killed them.

Kieran: How old were you when this had happened?

Dr Kozak: Like, your age. Fifteen.

Kieran: So you just found out that Tiffany and Jackson are alive again after like, twenty years?

Dr Kozak: Yes.

Then they both sighed at exactly the same time. Unlike Dr Kozak with Kieran though, Kieran was helplessly staring at Dr Kozak.

Dr Kozak: Why are you staring at me like that again?

Kieran: Because something is on my mind again.

Dr Kozak: What?

Kieran: I was just thinking... About how much I miss Lauriel.

Dr Kozak: *Says this really angrily* Do not talk about Lauriel! Ever again! I hate her with all my heart!

Kieran: Yeah well I'm talking about Lauriel whether you like it or not.

Dr Kozak: Plus weren't you two enemies?

Kieran: Yeah but then she apologised and then we made up and became the best of friends.

Dr Kozak: I hate Lauriel so much!

Kieran: Do you ever regret killing her?

Dr Kozak: What? No! She killed my son, Kieran!

Kieran: But was there anything that you actually liked about Lauriel? And don't lie or say no either. There must have been something.

Dr Kozak didn't say anything.

Kieran: But seriously. Think about it. I know you hated her a lot but there's got to be something that you liked about her before you killed her.

Dr Kozak: *falls really quiet* Well, if we're being genuinely honest here, I guess she was kind of charming. I liked how she was courageous and brave and never gave up, especially when she was too sick to take the perilous obstacle course test and kept begging me to do it, even if her and Anastasia had both cheated. I liked her rebelliousness.

Kieran: Told you Lauriel had some good characteristics. You just needed to look hard for them.

Dr Kozak: On the other hand... *becomes angry all over again* Lauriel was annoying, she always jumped to conclusions, she always made me scream at her, she was always moody, oh yeah, and she and Valentina worked together to kill my son! I was so irritated when I found that out!

Kieran: How would you rate you and Lauriel's friendship out of ten?

Dr Kozak: What's ten?

Kieran: You guys were best friends and nothing could pull you two apart.

Dr Kozak: Okay. Let me think about it.

Kieran didn't say anything.

Dr Kozak: Minus a million and one.

Kieran: Wow you really hated Lauriel didn't you?

Dr Kozak: Yes. Now can we please change subjects, I hate talking about her.

Kieran: Dude why didn't you just tell anyone that Lauriel killed your son and Astera killed your grandfather which were the real reasons on why you killed both of them?

Dr Kozak was annoyed when he heard Lauriel's name however Kieran was also talking about Astera, not just Lauriel alone, and Dr Kozak had tolerated Astera, kind of.

Dr Kozak: Because I kept that to myself.

Kieran: But why would you keep something like that to yourself?

Dr Kozak: Because no one would ever believe me over such things like that.

Kieran: You're a very introvert person Dr Kozak aren't you?

Dr Kozak: Yes. That's why it's best not to trust anyone with anything.

Kieran just stared at him.

Dr Kozak: No offence.

Kieran: You should have at least told someone.

Dr Kozak: Yeah but who though? A lot of people in KOZAHKISTAN HEADQUARTERS hate me, Kieran.

Kieran: You're probably joking.

Dr Kozak: No. There are 37,000 people here at the moment Kieran. And guess how many people hate me?

Kieran: Like two.

Dr Kozak: Higher.

Kieran: Three?

Dr Kozak: It's higher than a thousand.

Kieran: One thousand and one?

Dr Kozak just did a face palm in return.

Kieran: I'm sorry but you didn't make that clear, bro. So how was I supposed to know? Plus how many people hate you here?

Dr Kozak: Seventeen thousand two hundred and fifty six people, Kieran.

Kieran: What on Earth? You're joking.

Dr Kozak: Not really. *shows Kieran his phone* There's a people that hate Dr Kozak fan club and 17K people have joined.

Kieran: Why are you part of it?

Dr Kozak: I'm not. Elizabeth texted me that just now, on her phone.

Kieran: Jesus, why do so many people hate you?

Dr Kozak: Because I *air quotes* "never notice them". *air quotes end*.

Kieran: They do realise that there's like one of you and the chances of you being in a room is like one to fifty thousand, right?

Dr Kozak: Yes but they don't really understand that. I don't care what haters think, anyway.

Kieran: You shouldn't.

Dr Kozak: I know.

Silence.

Kieran: And going back to before... Do you really just kill people that deserve to die?

Dr Kozak: Well... *trails off really melodramatically* Sometimes. About 97% of the time anyway.

Kieran: What about the other three percent?

Dr Kozak: Sometimes I kill people by coercion.

Kieran: What do you mean by that?

Dr Kozak: I meant that sometimes I'm forced to kill people, and I can't really do anything about it.

Kieran: When have you ever been *air quotes* "forced" *air quotes end* to kill someone?

Dr Kozak: When Tiffany and I had to babysit someone. We were like nine back then, and the person we had to babysit was three. My father kind of forced me to kill the person I was babysitting.

Kieran: What? Why?

Dr Kozak: Because he didn't like her.

Kieran: What was the person you had to babysit's name? If you remember. This was over 20 years ago, after all.

Dr Kozak: Esther. Anyway, my father told me to kill Esther, and I said no. He then told me that it was either I killed Esther or my father killed me....

Kieran: Your father is crazy. No offence.

Dr Kozak: None taken. It's true. We all hated him. Anyway, yeah... I killed Esther. And funnily enough, Esther's parents were happy because they were going to abort the poor baby anyway.

Kieran: Why would they abort Esther?

Dr Kozak: She was blind. She was deaf. She couldn't do anything. She was useless. Just like me right now.

Kieran: You're not useless... And you're not deaf.

Dr Kozak: Yeah well I'm blind. Colour blind. *points to something* You see that blue door over there?

Kieran: It's purple.

Dr Kozak: Exactly.

Kieran didn't reply. There was no reason to anyway because by that time, Dr Kozak's phone rang and he picked it up.

Dr Kozak: Do you mind? I've got to take this.

Kieran: Who is it?

Dr Kozak: Tiffany.

Then Dr Kozak had answered his phone and then the next minute, him and his long lost sister were having a conversation on speaker through the phone.

Dr Kozak: Hey TiffTaff, how you doing?

Tiffany: Hey Demz the Magic Gemz.

Kieran: Demz the magic Gemz?

Dr Kozak: Short for Demetrius.

Kieran: Short?

Tiffany: Who are you talking to there, Demetrius?

Dr Kozak: Oh just my "acquaintance" Kieran.

Tiffany: Kieran who?

Dr Kozak: Kieran Harper.

Tiffany: I've never heard of him. How old is Kieran?

Dr Kozak: Turning 16 October 11th.

Kieran: *smiles* Oh my god, you know my birthday. But I don't know yours.

Dr Kozak: June 20th. *turns back to Tiffany again* Anyway why'd you call?

Tiffany: Just wanted to say hi to my favourite brother in the world.

Kieran: Wow you guys are really close.

Dr Kozak: Yep. *to Tiffany through the phone* But why didn't you tell me that you were still alive after like twenty years?

Tiffany: I lost my phone, and it's taken me almost two decades to save up to buy a new one. I'm really sorry, Demetrius.

Dr Kozak: That's fine. At least you're still alive though. Not dead like everybody thinks you are.

Tiffany: Well I guess I can't argue with you there. Anyway how's Elizabeth and Valentina?

Dr Kozak: Elizabeth's fine although I don't really talk to her much but Valentina's dead.

Tiffany: *screams* Valentina's dead?

Dr Kozak: Nooo, I said uh... Valentina likes bread.

Tiffany: Valentina hates bread, Demetrius.

Kieran: No he said Valentina's dead. He killed her.

Dr Kozak shot Kieran a dirty look.

Tiffany: *really annoyed* Why would you kill Valentina, Demetrius?!

Dr Kozak: Because she killed my son.

Tiffany: Marcel or Tyrese?

Dr Kozak: Tyrese. Lauriel helped her as well.

Tiffany: Wait. Lauriel? Lauriel Wilson?

Dr Kozak: Yes, Lauriel Wilson.

Tiffany: Wasn't she your next door neighbour?

Dr Kozak: Yeah she was.

Tiffany: So you killed Lauriel and Valentina?

Kieran: And Astera!

Dr Kozak shot Kieran another dirty look, then muttered the words 'annoy me one more time and you'll be dead, Kieran'.

Tiffany: You killed Astera?! Wasn't she your wife?

Dr Kozak: She killed grandfather.

Tiffany: Oh my gosh. So they were the horrible people all along and you were the good person.

Dr Kozak: That's what I've been trying to tell you all along Tiffany.

Tiffany: Anyway I've got to go. Laurence and Jackson need me.

Dr Kozak: Come to think of it where are you guys?

Tiffany: SITNOL.

Dr Kozak: *confused* SITNOL?

Tiffany: Stop In The Name Of Laurence. Laurence made up his own KOZAHKISTAN HEADQUARTERS but changed the name. And he called it Stop In The Name Of Laurence. We all call it SITNOL for short.

Dr Kozak didn't reply. Tiffany just said that she needed to go and then she hung up unexpectedly.

Dr Kozak: I just got a text message that my father just died in prison at the age of 80. He's been there since aged 57.

Kieran: And do you care?

Dr Kozak: No. Of course not. I hated him. Hated him with all my heart, just like Lauriel.

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Moral of chapter: Once again, never trust Kieran.