ACT II: TAESAN,

AUTUMN 2036, 4:52 PM.

BUSAN, SOUTH KOREA.

HAN TAESAN waits quietly in the lobby outside the therapist's office, waiting for the minutes to pass until the clock strikes 5 PM. His leg bounces impatiently as he stares up at the ceiling, his finger tapping rapidly on the arm of the lounge chair. His eyes close, his ears filled with the sound of the therapist's receptionist clacking away at the keys of her keyboard, the sound of cars passing by outside the building very faint. He lets out a breath, cracking his knuckles.

DR. KIM clears his throat and Taesan sits up quickly, looking as if he'd just woken up from a dream. His eyes meet Dr. Kim's, whose hands are in the pockets of his coat, holding back his laughter.

DR. KIM
You can come in, Mr. Han. I don't know what you're doing waiting out here.

Taesan looks around, his eyes landing on the receptionist. He then looks back at Dr. Kim.

TAESAN, quietly.
She told me to...

Dr. Kim waves him off and Taesan stands up, acknowledging the receptionist before walking into his office, the doctor follows suit. The door closes, and Dr. Kim lets out a chuckle.

DR. KIM
She's new. She doesn't know who you are.

TAESAN
Ah.

He motions for Taesan to have a seat as he makes his way to his desk, sitting down in his own chair. Dr. Kim puts on a pair of glasses and picks up a clipboard and a pen, clicking the pen rapidly as he skims the contents of the file before him — a patient he'd met with earlier that day. He then pauses, eyeing Taesan up and down.

DR. KIM
What are you doing here, Taesan?

Taesan doesn't respond immediately, but Dr. Kim can tell he's nervous by the way he fiddles with his fingers, with the way he hesitates to take a seat. He sighs, finally sitting down, leaning forward.

TAESAN
Dr. Ki—

DR. KIM, looking at the file.
Don't.

TAESAN
Fine. Leehan.

Leehan glances up at him through his glasses, meeting Taesan's eyes for a second before returning back to the file he was reviewing. He hums in acknowledgment, waiting for Taesan to continue. And after much hesitation and contemplation, he does.

TAESAN
Do you think Riku still loves me?

LEEHAN, unfazed.
Really? Is that why you're here?

TAESAN
I figured you'd know since you're good at reading people.

Leehan puts the clipboard down with a sigh, taking off his glasses and making eye contact with Taesan. He stares at him for a minute, trying to figure out if he was joking or not.

LEEHAN
Is this about that magazine interview she did?

TAESAN
Possibly.

LEEHAN, shaking his head.
I'm not gonna answer that.

Taesan scoots forward.

TAESAN, whining.
But why not?

LEEHAN
Because that's a stupid question. What would I know about your ex-wife?

TAESAN
But you know everything about everybody.

LEEHAN, raising a brow.
Fine. You want to know what I think?

Taesan's eyes widen in curiosity, waiting for Leehan to speak. The doctors leans forward.

LEEHAN (CONT'D), whispering.
You're wasting my time.

The rockstar leans back in his chair, scoffing as he gives Leehan a look.

TAESAN, annoyed.
I thought you were being serious.

LEEHAN
I am serious. Go away, Taesan.

TAESAN
I can't believe you'd kick out a friend who traveled all this way to see you.

LEEHAN
If all you did was come here to ask me about how Ms. Haruki feels, then I'd rather you go home because I don't have an answer.

Leehan looks away from him, returning his attention to the neglected file on his desk as he writes down some notes. Taesan frowns, refusing to get up from his chair, waiting for Leehan to say something else. But the doctor doesn't say anything, continuing to ignore him. So Taesan sighs, deciding maybe he should be more honest with him.

TAESAN
Leehan.

LEEHAN
Hm?

TAESAN, quietly.
I miss her.

Leehan looks up again, his previous annoyance disappearing the moment he saw his friend's face. He notices the way Taesan bit the inside of his cheek, holding himself back from saying more — or perhaps to stop himself from crying.

LEEHAN, softly.
You should tell her that.

TAESAN, shaking his head as he turns his head, looking away.
I don't think that's what she'd want to hear from me.

LEEHAN, putting the file down for the final time.
You read her interview, Taesan. The signs could not have been any clearer.

TAESAN
But it'll just ruin everything. Again.

LEEHAN
You're already divorced. What more could there be to ruin?

TAESAN
Everything. The last year I've spent trying to move on with my life — it all just came crumbling down the moment I read that interview.

The doctor stares at the rockstar for a moment, letting his words settle into the atmosphere. He swallows, contemplating if he should even continue the conversation or if he should try to convince Taesan that despite the written document keeping them apart, they never should've left each other.

He sighs and closes his eyes for a moment, then opens them.

LEEHAN
Do you think the divorce was for the best then?

TAESAN, shaking his head quickly.
No. I never did.

LEEHAN, leaning back.
Then why did you go through with it?

Taesan thinks about it for a moment. Why did he go through with it, especially when it was so obvious to him that he wanted everything but that?

TAESAN, unsure.
Because I thought that's what she wanted.

LEEHAN
And now you think otherwise?

TAESAN
I don't know, I just— [Pause.] I just think maybe she misses me a little, you know? Maybe that's what brought her to say all that, that she did all that for me.

LEEHAN
Did it ever occur to you that perhaps she went through with the divorce because she believed that's what you wanted?

TAESAN
But I never wanted it.

LEEHAN
And did you tell her that?

TAESAN, realization settling in.
I didn't.

LEEHAN, rather harshly.
Right. You didn't. You didn't even try to reason with her. Do you really think you have the right to miss her, Taesan? Don't you think that's a little selfish? Especially now?

TAESAN, frustrated.
I know it is, but I can't help it if I do. [Pause.] I can't just let go of something I had for so long and try to move on. It's like asking me to continue as if nothing had ever happened, to start over like what we had wasn't real.

LEEHAN
Maybe you should just leave her be.

TAESAN
Even if I wanted to, I can't. Everything just leads me back to her, Leehan.

LEEHAN
Fine. Then at least think it through. If you did see her again, what would you say?

TAESAN
I'd tell her I'm sorry.

LEEHAN
And?

TAESAN, peeling his cuticles.
And that I loved her.

He pauses as I ponders if he should say what he was thinking, if he had any right to say it after it all. Taesan hesitates, the words caught like a lump in his throat, not because he didn't want to say them, but because saying them aloud would confirm it all.

TAESAN (CONT'D)
I still love her.

LEEHAN
Do you think that would change anything?

TAESAN
I think it'd mean something, saying what I couldn't bring myself to before.

LEEHAN
Right, but would it change anything?

Taesan knows the answer, but he doesn't want to admit it. He doesn't want to admit that the chances of Riku wanting to cancel their divorce were slim, that maybe she said all of that so that the media would stop perceiving him as a bad person. Perhaps she was still looking out for him in her own way, he thinks. He sighs, shaking his head lightly.

TAESAN
No. At least I don't think it will.

LEEHAN
You won't know that until you tell her.

TAESAN
How am I supposed to do that when she ignores my messages and won't pick up my calls?

LEEHAN
Maybe because she's actually trying to move on.

TAESAN
I don't want that.

LEEHAN, sighing frustratedly.
Then what do you want, Taesan? You want to talk to her, but won't because you're afraid it's not what she wants. You asked for a divorce because that's what you thought she wanted, even though she never explicitly told you she did. When have you ever done something that you wanted to do, something that wasn't for her?

Taesan looks down, avoiding eye contact, suddenly overwhelmed by Leehan's sudden frustration, as well as his own. He grips the fabric of his pants, his knuckles turning white.

TAESAN
You know, for a therapist, you're pretty mean, Leehan.

LEEHAN
This isn't a session, Taesan. I'm telling you this as your friend.

TAESAN
It doesn't matter. I know you're right.

LEEHAN, incredulously.
Do you?

TAESAN
I do.

Leehan stares at him for a moment, then sighs, somewhat guilty about how passive aggressive he'd been.

LEEHAN
Do you wanna know what I think?

TAESAN
Are you gonna kick me out again?

LEEHAN, chuckling.
No.

TAESAN
Go for it then.

LEEHAN
I think you should meet with her. Whether you have to fly to Nagoya or get her to come here. Get all of this off your chest and tell her, not me.

TAESAN
A lot of people have been telling me that.

LEEHAN
Then maybe you should listen to them.

TAESAN
Maybe. [Then] You know, when I told her I loved her for the first time, Riku cried.

LEEHAN
Did she?

TAESAN
Yeah. I didn't know why. To this day, I still don't know why. But all I felt in that moment was that I didn't want to see her cry anymore. That's why I married her — so I wouldn't have to see her cry. That's what I promised her.

LEEHAN
Seems you didn't do a good job keeping that promise.

TAESAN
And you know the worst part about it? It seemed all she ever did was cry around me. Even when I wasn't there — I could tell she wanted to or she already had.

He pauses again, tearing up.

TAESAN (CONT'D)
I just wanted to spend the rest of my life by her side, Leehan. I don't know how we ended up here, what I could've done to change anything. [His voice cracks, crying.] I don't know what I did wrong.

Leehan feels his heartstrings tug, watching his best friend sit in the chair across from him and sob. He knows he'd been hurting, that their divorce was something he'd always regret, but he wasn't aware of how much pain he was truly in. He wasn't aware of the fact that he really did — no, does — love Riku despite it all. Perhaps that's why he puts so much effort into reaching out, why it drove him crazy whenever she didn't respond.

Kim Leehan is a great therapist, and a terrible friend.

The doctor stands up and walks around his desk to Taesan, putting a hand on his shaking shoulders in an attempt to comfort him.

LEEHAN
You didn't do anything wrong, Taesan. Things happen. Life happens.

TAESAN
But why did it happen to us?

LEEHAN, sighing.
The reason why doesn't matter. Sometimes, things don't go our way, even if we wanted them to. We just have to accept it and learn to live with it.

Taesan sniffles and looks up at Leehan, he's looking down at him. He knows he pities him, no matter how much the doctor denies it — and a part of him can't help but hate him for it. Still, Taesan knows he's right. He knows that knowing why he and Riku had to part wouldn't change anything.

But accepting it? Coming to terms with it? Letting her go when all he wants is to hold onto her like his life depends on it?

That he cannot do.

TAESAN
You're good at what you do, you know that?

LEEHAN
It's why I do it.

TAESAN
It's bullshit.

LEEHAN, nodding in agreement.
I know.

TAESAN
And you still do it.

LEEHAN
People find it easier to breathe when others tell them what they want to hear, but it's much easier to live when you're told what you need to hear, Taesan.

Leehan walks back to his chair and sits down. Taesan's eyes remain on the doctor, watching him scoot forward and look him in the eye.

LEEHAN (CONT'D)
Maybe if you spoke to Riku, she could tell you what you want to hear. Right now, I can only tell you what you need.

TAESAN, looking up.
What do I need, then?

LEEHAN
An appointment.

Taesan chuckles at Leehan's joke, his shoulders relaxing. Leehan's eyes soften at the sight of his friend's smile, the first one he'd given him in a while. They fall silent, the once tense atmosphere diminishing.

TAESAN
I'll talk to her.

LEEHAN
Good. You need it.

TAESAN
Do you think she'll want to?

LEEHAN
It's not really about what she wants either, but what she needs — and I think a part of her knows she needs it too.

Taesan nods. Leehan reaches for a box of tissues sitting behind him and offers them to Taesan. He hums, taking three from the box. He wipes his face and blows his nose, then throws them in the trash can beside his desk. Leehan leans forward.

LEEHAN, curiously.
Can I ask you something?

TAESAN
Sure.

LEEHAN
Why'd you sing that song? The one at your show four months ago.

TAESAN, eyes widening and face turning red in sudden embarrassment.
You were watching?

LEEHAN
Of course I was. I was there. But why'd you sing it?

Taesan stares at him, wondering the same thing.

TAESAN
It wasn't something I planned.

LEEHAN
That's not what I asked, Taesan.

TAESAN
I know, I just— [Pause.] I don't know why I did either. I just felt like I had to, you know? Like maybe it would give me a sense of closure.

Leehan leans back and makes and 'o' with his lips, nodding to himself.

LEEHAN, joking.
I assume it wasn't enough closure then.

TAESAN, sarcastic.
You're funny. You should've been a comedian rather than therapist.

LEEHAN, smiling.
I should've.

The office goes silent once again, and Taesan finally decides that perhaps it was time he went home. He stands, and Leehan stands with him, watching as the star pushes in his chair and sighs.

LEEHAN (CONT'D)
You're leaving?

TAESAN
It's about time.

LEEHAN
Let me walk with you, then.

Taesan and Leehan leave the office, acknowledging the receptionist who was playing games on her cellphone, waiting for something to happen. She puts it down quickly when she sees Dr. Kim, bowing her head slightly with a sheepish smile. Leehan chuckles and they leave the lobby, making their way towards the nearest elevator. They press the button and wait for the elevator to arrive.

TAESAN
Leehan.

LEEHAN
Taesan.

TAESAN
Why Busan?

LEEHAN, brows furrowing.
What do you mean? This is my home.

TAESAN
Yeah, but why here? You had so many good offers in Seoul, ones that paid ten times the amount you get paid here. So why Busan?

LEEHAN
It was never about money. I couldn't care less about how much I got paid. [Pause. He turns to look at Taesan.] As long as I enjoy what I do, as long as I'm passionate about it — that's all that ever mattered to me.

The elevator dings and the doors open. They step inside, standing side by side, and Leehan presses the button that will take them to the parking garage where Taesan left his car.

LEEHAN (CONT'D)
Why do you sing? Why do you write? Why do you produce? Why do you do anything you do?

Taesan stays quiet. He had never really thought about it before, at least not recently. When he'd started singing, he had always just done it because people told him he was good at it, but it was never a choice he'd made on his own.

So why did he keep doing it?

TAESAN
Riku liked when I sang. She liked my songs.

LEEHAN
So you did it for her?

TAESAN
Everything I've ever done was for her.

LEEHAN
That should tell you all you need to know then.

The elevator stops and the doors open once again, revealing the dimly-lit parking garage. The two step out, but Leehan doesn't walk any further. Taesan looks back at him, wondering if he would say something else. But he doesn't say much. Instead, he lifts his hand and waves.

LEEHAN, smiling.
See you.

Taesan smiles and waves back.

TAESAN
See you.

Leehan turns around and gets back in the elevator, and Taesan watches as the doors close. Then, he's left alone in the parking garage. He makes his way towards his car, taking the keys of his black Mercedes out of his pocket. He unlocks the car and gets inside, closing the door with a loud sigh. Taesan rubs the side of his face and puts the car in reverse as he backs out of his parking spot, then puts the car in drive, making his way home to Seoul — to an cold house, an empty house. The house that was meant to be shared with her.

It was one thing to say it out loud, that he'd talk to her, that they'd talk about how they really felt, but it was another to actually do it. Haruki Riku had done a great job avoiding him until now, and Taesan knew her well. His calls would go straight to voicemail, his messages would be left on delivered just like all the ones he'd sent before. Despite how she really felt — or how she thought he did — he knew that the last thing she wanted was to talk to him about something that should be left in the past. But still, Han Taesan just can't seem to let her go. No, he doesn't want to let her go. Not when he still loves her so intensely despite it all. Not when a part of him knows she feels the same way. There was still so much he hadn't told her, so much she deserved to hear.

Maybe if he'd told her the truth, they never would've been in this position. Maybe if he'd listened to what she wanted rather than assuming that this was the best decision for them, he wouldn't be pulled over on the side of the highway, gripping the steering wheel until his knuckles turned white, tears pouring from his eyes as he leans his head against it.

Maybe if he'd done it when he had the chance, it would've meant something.

END OF ACT II.