❄ SAILOR'S MOON | SILVER ❄

Review of sailor's moon :

Reviewer: The boss of the lost boys (Peterpan2210)
Reviewee: Selchies
Story reviewed: Sailor's moon
Overall comments: I read this in math lecture and I love math lectures....can there be any other compliment better than that? Well I'll say it in clearer words, I FREAKING LOVED IT!

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Cover

10/10

Perfect cover. It shows that the story is a texting story and the theme is cute...like the story.

And since it's very unbecoming of a reviewer to squeal, I shall simply say, Kudos to you and your work!

Description:

8/10

Yes, the description is fine. Yes it's accurate, it fits the book. Though I must say I was surprised at the fact that though the book itself seldom had any grammar mistakes, the description was littered with them. See the thing is, description shows your skills as a writer to be able to shorten your plot into a mini summary of sorts . But it also showcases your writing abilities that the reader might be seeing in the book itself. So if your description has grammar mistakes, unfortunately, the reader will be forced to think that maybe your grammar is not as good as they'd like it to be which, for some people, can be put off-ing.

Also the description is a bit too revealing. Maybe keep it vague? Only a bit. Otherwise it's all good.

Basic plot:

9/10

Although I rather loved the story, it was a cliché- texting AUs often are. It was a bit fast too but okay, that's forgivable because it was after all, a short story. And that's the only reason I've given you a 9, instead of a 10.

Otherwise I loved the plot and you've introduced gender fluidity very well. I personally feel that since gender fluidity is more sensitive topic, it should be pulled off as sensitively which, by the way, you managed very well in that chapter where Roman is seen wearing a dress and then suddenly the "he" thought-version of himself changes to a "she". Beautifully written, that.

Grammar:

9/10

Very clean. Barely any grammar mistakes but that does not mean they aren't there. I read the book twice and there are minor grammar mistakes in the traditional chapters of the story. There are also punctuation marks missing. They could be typos or made thoughtlessly because you don't seem like the type to make grammar mistakes but yes, maybe have someone proofread it or proofread it yourself.

Also work on the grammar in the description.

Phrasing/Tone + Tense + Voice:

9/10

It was confusing, the POV switch. I think I got confused when you switched POVs in two of the chapters. And then you went back to the original POV. Find a middle ground to make the transition easier because I read books like that all the time and if it confused me, it's bound to confuse others too.

Also, at some places you haven't italicized the sentences that you should and at others you've italicized stuff you shouldn't. Please read it over.

And, in the last chapter, in the line "Parker wore a simple black tuxedo" You've written, "Parker wore a smile black tuxedo". Edit that.

Otherwise was all good.

Overall score: 45/50
I hope this review was helpful. Rate this review out of a 5. 

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