Reviewer: PeterPan2210
Reviewee: Mitali2203
Story reviewed: Arrange Marriage.
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                      Overall comments:
It’s cute, like most Yoonmin stories but it wasn’t anything special. Especially coupled with the level of grammar and structuring used in the book.
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Cover:
7/10
Cover's okay. It’s rather plain though. I get that it’s a fanfiction but maybe you could use manip or something for the cover?

Title:
6/10
Plain. Functional. It works but it’s so overtly plain. Think of a creative name. The director could’ve titled “call me by your name" a simple, “sad, gay love story" but that wouldn’t have garnered as much attention as “call me by your name” did.

Description
7/10
Maybe a bit more lengthy? Add something about the past love to attract angst fans like me. Also there’s a grammar mistake in there.

Basic plot:
10/10
I mean, yeah, it’s good. Not very original but I’m not rating you for originality here either. Overall the plot was fine.

Content:
7/10
We really need to discuss your writing style. It’s as if you don’t have a distinctive writing style. It’s all very straightforward. Also there are so many scene breaks. You can’t have scene breaks in every chapter. Plus, some of your chapters have as many as 5 scene breaks, constant pov changes. No offense but not a good sign of a successful book.

Try to make your writing more fluid, connective in a way that you wouldn’t have to take help of scene breaks over and over and over.

Usually, for writers who have problems with writing style in the first person, like yourself, I suggest writing in the omniscient third person. That way you wouldn’t have to change perspectives over and over.

The rest of it was fine. Cute to be honest. I’ve read a lot of yoonmin fanfics back in the day when I was still heavily obsessed with them and this one would rank, plot and cuteness quotient wise, at the near top.  But you do need to pay more attention to your writing style.

I liked however, your use of vocab in the book.

Pace + Sequence:
7/10
It’s good. But I’d suggest not making filler chapters entirely separate chapters. Add filler in the same chapter if you want. Usually fillers are done because you’re running out of ideas or because you need a minor connecting link, in which case don’t bother making it an entirely separate chapter.

Secondly, I didn’t quite like how you jumped into the “give them the photo and tell them they’re boutta get married" thing. I’d like if you build up some background before that. Personality building pre-marriage and then you drop the news. It just seems like a really abrupt way of starting the story to me.

Grammar + Punctuation + Tense:
5.5/10
Too many spelling and grammar mistakes. The book needs severe editing.

Structuring/Tone + Voice
9/10
This was fine mostly. Although the structuring was a bit awkward.

Originality:
6/10
Not entirely original. We have too many arranged marriage fics on wattpad with yoonmin as the couple. What I liked about yours was that they didn’t immediately hate the idea of marrying the other and treat each other with coldness or something like they do in other books.

Reader enjoyment
8/10
Quite the book.

Overall score:
72.5/100

Good Job! Much scope for improvement.

Thank you for choosing me!

I apologize for being so late. I had major examinations (12th cbse boards) going on and I just finished my chemistry exam today. I still have biology left but since it isn't as hard as Physics, Chem, and Math, I finished writing your review today.

Again, I apologize for being so late.

Please rate this review on a scale of 5 based on how useful it was and suggest improvements, if any.