I'm Balto,

A British bulldog baking

In this ex-pat sun.

We brits are not built

For burning beneath these

Bellows.

My Churchill jowls swamped

With salty salvia sweat.

My techno breath beat

Heaving in the excess of hot air.

Erupting belches sound like

"Aqua! Aqua! Water! Water!"

You must learn these things in faraway parts.