-If you refuse to critique stories with lgbt+ characters and/or think stories with these characters is "pandering" or "politically correct" or it makes you uncomfortable, I would rather you not ask me to review your work. Thank you.

-If you're a bigot in general, probably best to avoid asking for a review.

-You're welcome to hand me books with serious topics, but know that if it's not handled well, the review won't be pretty.

-Because poetry is so subjective, I cannot accept it.

-I CAN do fanfiction, but you have to tell me specifically what fandom it is and if there's any canon I need to know. This does not extend to Real Person Fanfiction - RPF creeps me out way too much and I will not take it.

-Otherwise, other genres are fair game.

-I do not pull reviews. Sorry. Don't come to me if you're not cool with maybe being disappointed.

-I will do as much as I can/as much as available unless I for some reason find I cannot continue. If that becomes the case, I'll let you know where I stopped and review up until that point.

-Depending on the length of your novel, it may take some time. So yes, this means you can send me your story with 100+ parts... but do be aware that depending on the size of the chapters, it's going to take a bit.

-I can say no for whatever reason. I probably won't, but I might.

-It'd be cool if you read one of my books in return, but it's not a requirement so you don't have to.

-Please give me LGBT characters. Please. 

-Fill out the form. Please. It's on the next part. 

-Yes, warnings are mandatory. I don't require a warning for, say, language or LGBT content, but other stuff like drug use or sexual assault needs a warning. Please. If you have no warnings, just say so, otherwise it looks like you forgot a part of the form. And don't be cheeky and it use it to tell me it's "not cliche" or to try to tell me how I'm supposed to interpret the work. Let your work speak for itself.

-If during the wait for me to review your book you start being a dick to me, or I see you being a dick to other reviewers, or being a dick in the comments of other reviews, I will remove you from the queue. No warnings. No ifs, ands, or buts. I pay attention to other reviewers and won't provide service to a troublemaker. EDIT: This includes if you are a "destructive" reviewer and are an asshole to your clients. This includes "brutally honest" reviews that just shred someone's work. There's a difference between being harsh and honest while still being constructive and just being a dick. 

-Because people like to not read the rules, there's now a password. The password will change randomly. Currently it's Sanderson. If you neglect to have a password, or get it wrong (simple misspellings excluded), it's a denial.