Title: Breakouts

Author: tla7539

Genre: Science Fiction...?

Quick Summary: This book is like a geode. You gotta crack down on this hard exterior and work on getting to the good stuff you could have underneath.

Thoughts:

The writing itself is alright. At times, it's stilted [the first paragraph comes to mind] and there are times punctuation gets misused. The dialogue is a bit too loose and overexaggerated for my liking in a lot of areas.

I feel like there should be more research about how OCD works because while Sage keeps SAYING he has OCD, the most it's displayed through is his need for organization? Which is a stereotype about OCD. I feel like there's hints he COULD have intrusive thoughts? But if that's the case, it needs to be made more evident. Sage's mental illness needs way more fleshing out.

The characters could also use more fleshing out. I can't tell any of Sage's sibling apart. Which I mean, they only showed up in a phone call, but still there should be something that distinguishes them past "this one is seven and this one is the oldest and..." Also, right now, Penelope's only defining traits are that she's helping Sage and she's a jealous asshole when it comes to girls hitting on her older brother. She's an older teenager. Why does she care, unless she has romantic feelings for her brother?

The description could use some work, especially when talking about the "warehouse". The Base when Sage first gets there is called a "warehouse looking room"... if a room is the size of a warehouse, it works just as well to call it a warehouse. And in general it would help to give a basic floorplan? Where are the rooms in relation to the main room, for example?

In terms of setting, how do these powers work? It's heavily suggested genetics has something to do with it. So why doesn't Sage's family exhibit any sort of powers? 

Also, if this book is science fiction, why are the people with powers called Paranormals/Supernaturals? And furthermore, science fiction entails there's a scientific explanation for everyone's powers and so far there's nothing in that vein. Maybe it comes later. I don't really know. 

And finally, there are quite a few logistical errors with this book.

-The attempted setup of tutoring. The story starts off in a college classroom, among other college students [and maybe a couple fellow Running Start students]. And I'm expected to believe that in this college setting, Sage is forced to tutor a failing fellow college student. Perhaps it's different in Pennsylvania, but I'm a college student. Where I go, if you're failing, it's up to YOU to fix your own grade. Unless you have a VERY good reason, YOU have to seek tutoring yourself and YOU have to work to fix your grade It's very unbelievable to me that Sage, who is a HS student attending college [through Running Start, I'm certain], would be forced to be a tutor for a college student because that doesn't happen. Aforementioned failing college student is the one that has to seek these services. The teacher would not be the one to do all of this.  Students paid to be in the college classroom, so it's their responsibility to take care of their own grades. 

-I'm not sure I buy the whole "college student bullying a RS kid" like I guess it COULD happen but normally by college people learn to stop giving a fuck. I'm not as firm on this element.

-This whole "IQ" bit. IQ doesn't really mean much of anything, honestly, and Sage's IQ gets mentioned so many times I kinda feel like it's just him verbally jacking off to how smart it makes him sound.  

-Phrases and how Sage handles them. Particularly, in chapter two when Penelope called him Einstein as a joke and he felt the need to correct her, but immediately afterwards displays he understands turns of phrase and how to use them. So... was he correcting her to jack off about his smartness? Or was that a character inconsistency? Was he just being an asshole?

-Sage's family. His mother just. Is okay with him being gone for several days? Why? I know she's typically slated from what I'm seeing as uncaring and such but still like... Sage keeps playing up that she would care? Unless he was lying, I guess.

-Why the fuck isn't Penelope wearing protective gear in chapter six? I get it's so she looks "tough" or whatever but honestly that's really really stupid of her. And also, as much as I love she punched him... why in the chin? Pick somewhere that won't seriously injure him or, ahem, give him a concussion. In general, in traditional sparring scenarios it's a good idea to avoid the face overall because shit like this happens. Not to mention, she heeled him in the nose. Hard enough and she could've killed him. 

I know this is all to prep for fighting Spectrum, but it all doesn't mean shit if you kill the person you're sparring with.