November rains are a pleasant surprise, not many cycles ago she used to love these showers. Drenching in the torrent, where the two realities, the sky and land comes to the union, a sight of beholding.

Oh, how she misses those nights.

A sigh, things could be so better, they should be, but now this is what it is. Another wind with blighting drizzles, she is almost drenched only by a few meters of the walk, from her porch to the front door.
A storm is near.

While passing the distance, her eyes didn't miss the sight of the familiar car parked there. She smiles, a knowing smile, Zain is here.

"Appi!"

She hasn't even entered properly when two strong arms engulfed her. The arms where she can always go without a second thought, arms of Zain Amir.
This twenty-four years old brother is her safe haven.

Even though she knows life is not generous to her, but having Zain around makes her sigh in relief, that even if someday she is gone Zain Amir will bear all her responsibilities with a smile.
A person she can rely on, a person who didn't leave.

"Ap sb kb aye? Abba sb khairiyat toh hain yuh achanak?"
Though seeing Zain here is not much unusual to her, but seeing her father certainly is.

"Sab khairiyat hain bacche, Meri flight hai aj raat ki aur Zain ko kuch din apke saath rehna tha, toh maine socha jate waqt apse milte huye jaye."

Mirza is happy that finally years later Seher is letting him be a part of her life.

"Abba, have a safe flight." Though Seher is not ready to let him in completely at this point in her life, she really doesn't care much.

"Haan bache, apna khayal rakhiye aur koi bhi zarurat ho toh hum apke saath hi hain."

He sighs, at least she is trying. He knows he can't be a good father to her, he is too late for that. But now they are in talking term. Sometimes it's good to accept the reality than to fight it, they did that.

Mirza Amir always make sure to check on his daughter twice a month, even if he is not in the country, he made frequent calls maybe for a few seconds but he did.

On the other hand, Saira came on the weekends and along with Zain, Ruhaan and Ashana they have pretty good Sundays together. Most of which ended with Zain and Ruhaan having a fistfight, yet next week they will be here.

Following dinner, Rubina went to her room, it was past her bedtime, but having Zain around means breaking all the normal daily routines which happen twice a week. Zain is almost a permanent resident of this place. Likely to be twice a week and sometimes even thrice he stays here. His own room with clothes, a study table and everything else is here. Seher firstly wanted to buy a three-bedroom house, but seeing that Zain would anytime stay over, she opted for the four-bedroom house with plenty of open space and a backyard.

.................................................................

"Appi? Busy ho?" Zain entered Seher's room, looking at him Seher understands there is something he needs to say.

She smiles, she knows.
He steps inside and sits leaning to the bed where she sits.

Zain Amir had grown up over a few hours, all because of her. A sad smile.

"Nope. Tell me what it is?"

" Appi, actually I was missing Mumma today, so I called Tayi Maa and she asked me to come here, I am thinking to bring Ashana here for some days too."

"Chachi loves you a lot and so does we all. Never hesitate to come here, it's your place too. And about Ashana, I just forgot to tell you, she was with her grandma for a few days, the good thing is that I am her legal guardian from now on."

A happy smile.
Finally, after two years he is seeing his sister smile, a real smile. Ashana is the sanity Seher needed.

"That's great news Appi, she will finally have a home."

He smiles. The storm is gone now, it's just sprinkling and soft winds, as his amber eyes look out lost in a memory, a beautiful memory.

"Zain" She called out.

"How you do all this Appi?"

He asked in a haze.

"Do what?"

"Everything. Like nothing happened to you?"

"Life." she gulps, a sigh.

"It is the best teacher Zain, with time it will teach you every lesson. Some you will love and others not. But life goes on, and slowly everything passes on its own"

"Is it easy to forget someone you love?" Zain asked her in a heavy voice, a voice that tells her that her doubt is right, her brother never got his chance to convey his love, he let his love go.

"You never forget someone you loved once. Love is not something you can ever forget, Zain. But the good thing is you start making new memories putting a cover on the past.

Slowly it fades away, a part of you will always be there in past, but living in the present is more important, much like a necessity."

"You still love him?"

He asked a part of him hate the person who caused his sister pain. But he knows the answer.

" I never stopped loving him Zain."'

He smiles. Some love stories lived for an eternity even after the lover left the other.

"He was everything I had. Keeping me sane in his arms. I lost him, and a part of me too."

She smiles a sad smile. She lived a life with him, she deserves a life together with him.

"Hadiya ka nikkah pkka hogya hai, kal parso mein wo log ajayenge yaha baat krne, ap tab kya karogi?"

And he said that now,
a pain that shouldn't be there.

"Kya krungi kya? Zindegi bhar toh nahin bhag sakti na, aur Hadiya meri behen jaisi hai, uske nikkah mein jana hoga. Chale jayenge 2 din ke liye, tu hoga na waha pe bs koi tension nahin!!"

Smacking Zain on the back she laughed off the situation, deep down even the idea of going back is making her feel nauseous. But now she knows to mask it, still her eyes show the pain.

"Wo new Hotel wala jo project uski meeting mujhe v attain krni h?"

He changed the topic,
no need to open up past wounds.

" Haa woh toh next week h, tab aram se baat hogi. Ab nikal mujhe kaam karne de."

Sitting by the window, watching the rain, winds taking her back to the past.

Clad in her white suit dancing in the rain with no sense of surrounding, her hairs drenched completely and dress sticking like her second skin. Unaware of the black heating stares from the balcony.

Soon a bolt of lightning struck and she lost her balance, closing her eyes waiting for the pain which never occurs. Opening her eyes, another lightening make her hugged him tightly.

" Pehli insaan hogi jisse barish pasand ho lekin lightening se darr" He teases her again, kissing the tip of her little pink nose.

" Ap chup rahe... ap bahut bure." Seher defended herself while burying herself deeper in his arms.

"Ek toh girne se bachao upar se baat suno, chahti kya ho Mohtarma."

" Apko chahti hun, deewano ki trh."

"Haaye, aashiq toh hum apke saalon se hai, ab kaha ka irada h sanam?"

" Apke room tak ka" She whispered lightly blushing more.

"ohhooo.."

And he carried a completely drenched Seher and himself to his bedroom. Laughter echoes all over the house which were soon replaced with moans and screams of love, pain and pleasure.

Only Seher have the ability to make him feel at home and relaxed after such a tiring day.

Things change with places and time.

Now it is a new place and the time is not like the old days. Delhi is not somewhere Seher is not used to with, she spent her twelve years of childhood here and her three years of graduation too.

Maybe those few years were the best moments of her life that she always keeps near to her heart. Those memories were the sole reason why she chose Delhi as her new home. But staying with her Saira is never an option, that place holds too many things which she haunts her now. This place is her own, and with Rubina, she is somehow managing to put up the happy face.

........................................................................

The next few days were hectic, passed along the soft winds and sleepless nights, but with Zain staying along, Sehar has been a little relaxed because Rubina won't bother about her much with all the pieces of stuff like having food on time, coming back on time, that all the things.

A few days later the invitation to Hadiya's wedding came and Rubina agreed to be there for a few days. Thankfully Seher was not there at home that time, saving herself from unnecessary talks and taunts of Sadia Khan.

Sadia Khan, to say an ingenious, manipulative woman will be understated. But anyhow, being the daughter of Khan Haweli, Sadia Khan is respected by everyone. A perfect businesswoman who always made her choices right.

Her daughter Hadiya Khan is surprising, a sweetheart. Being the little princess, spoiled rotten by her brother. Haider Khan got married last year, which Seher didn't attain, and sure thing Sadia never leaves a chance to taunt her on that too. Haider and Hadiya both were close to Seher, and Sadia loves her too but her not attaining a family wedding is surely something she will never accept. Though Seher has some valid reasons, Sadia Khan is not ready to let it go.

.................

On a cold winter night of mid-November, Seher keeping things ready for the very important meeting for the next day.

A sudden doorbell takes her out of the dreamy memories. Knowing Zain who must be sleeping by now, she opened the door and there stands Ahad Ahmed Khan.

She sigh.

Some people know their way back home, yet they refuse to come back.

He is one of them, or maybe this is not the home he is seeking.

To say seeing Ahad after two years with a bleeding lip, she did get a fair idea of another fight he got involved in unnecessarily. Standing out of the way, signing Ahad sit in her dining room she did his first aid, without a word.

And then he smiles which makes tears fighting to come up to the surface.

"Theek ho ap Mohtarma?"

The mere call of Mohtarma made Seher shut her eyes controlling her tears which may spill out any moment.

"Don't call me that Ahad."

Pain.

Pain is evident in that voice, and he knows, he had been there, still is there.

"Sorry."

"Chot kaise lagi tumhe?"

"Aree yaar gusse mein thora.."

"Genes mein itna gussa hai na?"

She taunted.

And it's true.

These people ruin things in anger, things they should have cherished all through life.

"Ab wo toh tum hi jano Seher."

"Ammi soo rahi, kal mil lena unse."

"Tumse milne aya hu."

"Wo kyu bhala?"

"Kyuki I do know yeh sab jo tum kar rahi hon, yeh sab tumhe ni mujhe karni chahiye. Tum dono meri zimedari hon. Lekin ni tumne khud sari zimedari le rakhi hain. Get a life Seher."

"Ahad, it is my life now. Aur iss bare m baat nahi krni mujhe. Ammi meri responsibility hain. Tum mujhe saalon se jante ho, all I hope that you will get it by now, but you are still there"

"And You? Did you move on?"

"I did. Main peeche dekhna chor diya h Ahad aur iske agee ek sabad ni."

Silence engulfs them.

The winds sway slowly, as they sit next to each other.

He straightens his legs on the couch, she gives him a cup of chai.

Another sad smile.

Chai.

He sips and closes his eyes, a certain pair of hazel brown eyes came into life, haunting him.

He gulps.

She is addicted to chai now.

A thing she used to hate years ago.

A sigh.

Things changed a lot.

" Wo actually maine... maine divorce papers sign kr diye h"

He whispers slowly, painstakingly. She smiles.

"After two years? Honestly mujhe lga nahin tha ke tum wo papers sign bhi karoge kabhi."

"I am tired now. You know, it is better to let go now. Somehow I know it's not gonna work now. Even you are not ready to let it go, then why should I keep being in a namesake marriage. I submitted those papers today and took the first flight to Delhi. Hopefully, you won't mind me staying in your other guest room."

"I won't. It's your place too."

"Haa sabko yahi bolti ho.But, I did the right thing na?"

"Staying in a relationship, feeling stifled, dying every moment is never an option okay. Leaving from there hoping for a better is.
I know there will be consequences after this divorce in our family, but trust me, they will understand. I will make them do so. You were never happy in this marriage. Just remember no matter what I am always there as your friend."

" You know having you as my friend makes everything so less complicated. When I came here I was lost, trust me signing those two years old papers was not at all easy. But now talking to you with this chai of yours, I feel so relax."

" Well coffee is overrated."

Soft laughs engulf.

After years, they are together at least.

"Do you miss him, Seher?"

A question he asked, an answer she doesn't want to give.

Silence, painful silence.

Loses, they have bear a lot of loses in these years.

"Sometimes I miss myself more Ahad." She mumbled.

Both looking out at the void sky.

"Don't you agree that I deserve a better closure, Ahad?" She whispers.

"We all deserves a better closure of our stories, Seher. Perhaps we never get what we want or what we deserve." He replied in a sad tone.

She sighs, resting her head on his shoulder, a bond that stayed even after years.

Friendship.

A friendship of decade.

"Zain hates you Ahad." She said.

He closes his charcoal eyes. He is tired now but years later at least he is here.

"I hate him more Seher." He replied, she smiles.

What she missed is the pain thoroughly conceal behind his words.

"Hadiya is getting married. I can't believe that." She shakes her head.

"Shukar hai yaha nahi the tum, warna Hadiya ko kabhi koi nahi milta." Laughing and talking, two long lost friends catch up that night.

In the background Rubina smiled, seeing her children finally speaking after years, sending a little prayer for everything to get back like past years soon.

Ahad Ahmed Khan is aware of all his responsibilities and all the burdens Seher have carried on herself without any complaint.

He was stuck in the past for a long and when he finally decided to let go, he came to the only place he can call home. The place near Seher Mirza.

And he was right, a few hours of talk and all the pain for the last two years seems to fade away slowly in the background.

Though he can see the pain and emptiness in Seher's eyes, he knows his limits, and not to ask her about it. He couldn't.

Another sad smile.

Unhe jana tha, humne jane diya,
ab isse badh ke wafa aur kya karte hum.

...........................................................

Meanwhile, on the other part of the city, Arhaan's flight already landed. Stepping here after years brings back many things in his mind.

A place he can call home is waiting for him, or maybe waiting for him but he doubts that now, after everything, all these years later, he has no hope from anyone. He did his part of mistake and lost everything he had once, maybe his home too.

Wo keh gye humse, ke unhe hamara intezaar rahega
sacch baat yeh, hume unke intezaar ka intezaar rahega.

Though he got an invitation to his friend Ayaan's wedding which he has to attain as Ayaan and he has been friends for years now, going to Lucknow he needs courage, to face someone may be waiting for him.

Passing through the lanes of the past is not easy. But once in a while, it gives peace. Arhaan's memory of these lanes was the same.

A wind passes as the sky today is dark, filled with clouds, taking him back in her memories.

"Haaye Meri Sherni aj bhi gussa thoda sa hi toh late hun maine."

"Thoda sa?? Puree 2hrs late ho Arhaan, kitna intezaar krwate ho!"

"Tum karti bhi toh meri Jaana"

"Agar sawaal tum ho, toh jawab mai, aur iss jawab ko uss sawal ka humesha Intezaar rehega."

"Haaye yeh baatein apki qatilyana, adaein kya kaam thi joh inn baaton se toh maar rahi ho"

"Allah qasam Arhaan aj peeth jaoge, ruko tum.."

Running around these lanes, laughing being carefree sometimes even barefoot at midnight, memories have their own way to the heart.

Those memories bring a smile to Arhaan's lips.

This place is where his abode lies, where he lived his most happy days, where he got the love of his life.

That was his last summer here, a beautiful summer with her.

A rare genuine smile started shining on his face as he looked forward to the view. Everything is the same just not them this time.

In past years, he has never felt this peace, maybe peace only lies here.

Maybe they were in love but not meant to be together, and when he loved her, he didn't put the condition to stay in a relationship forever right. While scrolling her Instagram he saw the last post, it's posted two weeks ago.

The sadness is prominent in those brown orbs yet she smiles making him lose a breath, just like all those years ago.

The memory of their last day is very clear in his mind.

Tears flooded her face, swelled red eyes, a pale-looking figure clad in a pink suit begging him to stop, to stay.

"Please Arhaan, don't do this to me, to us."

"Just leave okay, samjh nahi ata tumhe. Faisla tumhara tha. Kal bhi, Kal bhi I asked you for the last time, and you didn't choose me. Then why the fuck should I stay? For you. Please you will very much be alive with your so-called responsibilities.

While I on the other hand have nothing left here. The girl I love the most, the person who saved me from my demons, only she have the right to kill me, You did that Sherni, You killed me. So get the fuck out of my way."

" Please Arhaan, just for once listen, see I am not well. Just please..."

She grabbed his hand but he jerked it away. And left that place without looking back.

He left that day.

Leaving his broken heart and a girl bleeding in that room he had no idea about.

That night even the sky mourned, an era of their love ended.

He left, leaving many things behind without a last goodbye. The girl lost a part of her life that.

Death would have been much easier for her that night than the things she had to face.

But she survived.

...................................................

The mornings of Delhi on cool winters of mid-November is not that bad. And today at Seher's place everyone is having a really good time after many years.

Ahad is half lying on the sofa and half-awake Zain is not so ready for a meeting. The aroma of the morning breakfast of paratha spreads in the hall. Seher is almost ready for her meeting cross-checking everything again and again.

Seeing Ahad on an early morning in their living room is not something he is used to in this place like if it was their home back in Lucknow two years back, he will be not a bit shocked but this is something new to him. But he keeps lips shut, the painful memory was still fresh in his mind. So he silently walked towards his room.

After Zain left, Ahad smiled, shouldn't he be the one angry with him? Perhaps it was his fault.

Rubina passed him a little smile, her children had suffered enough, and she can't do anything about it.

He asked Rubina, who replied with a sweet smile kissing his forehead. "You are angry with me?"

"You are my son Ahad. I can never be angry with you for long and now that you are doing something right after years, there is no point to talk about the past. You deserve it and more than anything, She deserves happiness."

"You are right. She deserves happiness, which doesn't lie with me, and that's most painful for me. I lost her Amma. I failed to make her stay."

"You failed as a husband Ahad, you didn't fail to make her stay. You are making her free and that's the only thing you can do for her. And yes you did lose her, you lost a gem, a rare one, and trust me you lost her for good."

"I hope things will be better for Seher now. I am not going to leave you too."

"I hope that too Ahad, and now that you are here things will surely be better."

Rubina loves her son Ahad but that has not made her sugarcoat her bitter words. Ahad had done wrong and no matter what he has to pay for it.

And in the end, it cost Ahad more than one could afford.

He lost his Love.

But now there's a chance for a new beginning. Something good to start with and that's hope.

A hope that from now on everything will be better.

......................................................

The whole morning in Rizwan Enterprises today is full of happy moments. After years Ahad meets Ruhaan Rizwan, his long lost friend. They talk about all the things going on in their lives. That's the thing about catching up with old friends. What comes to Ruhaan as shock and making him angry is when Ahad told me about his divorce.

After that Ahad left the office for a few moments as his phone is in his car, his anger found its way out in front of Seher.

"I thought I am your best friend Seher par tu toh mujhe apna dost bhi nahi manti na?" He comes directly to the fact hurting him at the moment.

"Kya bol rahe ho ye sab?" Seher being confused asked him.

"I am saying the truth damn it. I know that too from someone else that you are getting a divorce?" Ruhaan screamed at her and keep on talking, but words make nearly no sense to her now.

"Divorce?" This word coming from Ruhaan's mouth made her numb, like a bucket of ice water is splashed onto her.

"Haa tune .....?"

Any other word stopped making sense to her. Her eyes are stuck on a certain figure wearing a blue suit who is still unaware of her presence.

He is not supposed to be here, she is not supposed to meet him.

Past is not supposed to come up in present.

Even breathing seems impossible for her with each passing second. Her eyes filled with tears, a clog in her throat, ears numb, she turned around refusing to meet others.

She refuses to face the past, to face him.

"No one should know about me Ruhaan, please" Uttering those words with great difficulty she left, leaving a shocked Ruhaan behind.

Not because he can't handle the meeting, because he witness an unfamiliar emotion in Seher's eyes.

She is scared today, something she never had been.

...............................................................

Running down to the underground garage her knees give up, body falling limb. Breathing becomes more difficult, tears falling continuously, her heart seeming to stop beating any moment and her stomach fall making bile come up.

Seeing Seher Mirza this vulnerable is shocking to both Ahad and Zain, fear engulfed them as losing her is not bearable.

Breathing seems impossible for her now.

"Seher... what happened?" Ahad is shocked looking at Seher like this, she is having her mental breakdown.

"Appi... appi...."

"Zain hospital...." Ahad said in a hurry.

"Haa bhai..."

The ride to the hospital is no less than a nightmare to them. Past is revolving around them and this time they don't know whom to blame it on. Seher is dear to them and in the past two years, the way she handled everything makes them respect her more. And the passing moments they are waiting outside is making them more nervous. Finally, the doctor comes out.

"Sudden increase in heart rate and blood pressure. The panic attack must say a severe one. The patient is stable, but still under observation for a few hours." The doctor informed them.

"We will wait here, thank you." Sitting inside the hospital room with an unconscious Seher is not a pleasant idea, so they stayed outside.

Seeing that there is still time left for the meeting and knowing all the hard work Seher has put into this project and the level of carelessness of Ruhaan Rizwan Ahad asked Zain to attain the meeting.

"Zain abhi bhi time hai, go attain the meeting, I will be here with her."

"But Ahad bhai Appi.." Zain is not sure of leaving his Appi with Ahad, which is quite natural even for Ahad. Considering his action last time in a similar situation, Zain not trusting Seher with him comes naturally.

"I will stay with her Zain. And this time I won't leave her." After Ahad's assurance, Zain left.

....................................................

In the meeting room, Ruhaan is so ready to leave. Giving a presentation is not his thing, hell without Seher this company will be buried in dust. In the last moment Zain enters, he sighed a little. But looking at the tensed face he knows something bad had happened for sure.

During the whole presentation, a certain pair of black eyes were fixed on Zain and the screen. Though he had known from the very beginning that Zain Amir will be good, seeing this guy grown up surely makes him happy. The moment Zain looked into those eyes his hands form a tight fist. Without wasting a second after the completion of the meeting, Zain left the hall. He did get a fair idea of what must have happened, and this is something bad if not taken care of properly.

..................................................

Sitting in the hall, waiting for his Appi to wake and hold him again is nothing new to Zain. But something he doesn't want to face again. Memories of last time are quite fresh in his mind.

Waiting outside their home as his Appi asked him to, the 20years old Zain is pacing to and forth. He is tensed and so wants to go inside. A certain know figure passed him and goes away without looking back at him for once. His heart falls to his stomach and he runs inside.

The scene before him make him panic. His appi standing on the top stair, holding her bleeding head and shivering figure, a mere call left her mouth

"Zain...' And she falls rolling down the stairs

"Appi....." Before Zain could even run up to hold her, she is lying near his feet.

Taking her to the emergency ward and waiting for her, Zain Amir has nothing in his mind.

"Patient is stable, unconscious now. But...."

After that Zain Amir is no more a child. Ahad Ahmed Khan left the hospital leaving Zain alone. That night many things lost their existence. Ahad Ahmed Khan lost his faith, confidence, his hope and courage. Zain Amir lost his childishness in the blink of his eyes.

Seher lying in the hospital, crying silently whispered,

"Intezaar rahega."

That is the night it all ended and something started. The beginning of faking a smile, hiding tears and pain.

The cold hospital tiles made him remember that painful night. The only difference, this time Ahad stays next to him. Ahad himself is afraid. Only one thing is here running in Ahad's mind, If something happens to Seher Mirza, that gonna be the end of his world.

They both decided not to inform anyone about today's incident. But the fear of something very bad going to happen next is clear in their mind.

"Any idea kya hua hoga?" Not knowing what to say Ahad breaks the silence, to his answer Zain nods his head.

"A little idea."

"Bata tab?"

"Meeting mein Ahmed Co. ke CEO bhi present the"

"No, it's bad news." Ahad cannot believe this.

"I don't know, But Appi..."

"Kuch nahi hoga usse, main hun iss dafa. Seher ko chor ke nahi jaunga." Ahad said to Zain more to himself. Losing Seher is not something Ahad afford in this lifetime. Making a new promise this time, he will fulfil it. He will stay this time.

//Kuch naye wade, kuch purane yaadein
kuch dur aur saath chalney ki umeed
Kuch toote dil, kuch toote khawab
Ek bar phir, kuch khone na daar//