Cadet Tib Kirk of Earth gulped a double shot of Saurian brandy. He reached for the bottle but Cadet Veruk of Romulus pushed his hand away.

"You've got the Kobayashi Maru test tomorrow, mate. This is your second bottle. If you're too drunk to even show up, you'll be reassigned to Culinary Management." Veruk moved the brandy away. "Forget about being a starship captain."

"No one passes Maru unless they cheat," Tib said, burping. "Like Grandad." He wiped his mouth.

"Fail like the rest of us mortals. You'll stay in the Command program and someday be a starship captain. Go get some sleep."

"If I blow the test, I'll be lucky to make bartender." Tib paid for the brandy. "You coming?"

"Later. My girl wants to meet  here."

"See you at the test." Tib left the bar. His head throbbed. Venit corked the near-full bottle of very expensive brandy and put it in his case.

*

Tib faced the officers waiting to destroy him in the Maru test. He stomach rolled and his head ached. Everyone fails. Still captain starships.

Admiral Setbo read the rules. She finished with, "Chance is beyond our control. You may, therefore, request one random event. It will be approved by a roll of dice. If the number you select is the roll, you have the event. You command the Enterprise. Begin."

Six hours later, Tib watched screens as K't'inga-class battleships waited to attack the Enterprise when it entered the Neutral Zone. He dithered, trying to choose between losing his ship by mutiny or destruction by Klingons. Either way, he'd lose the Maru. His head ached fit to split.

"Random event," he said, buying time. Veruk, why'd you let me drink so much? He'd lost his brandy somewhere. He'd have to buy another bottle.

Romulan. Romulus. The names stuck in his mind. What about them? He wanted to vomit.

"Answer or forfeit," said Setbo.

You're a Kirk. Act like one. "Random event. Six Romulan drone fighters in Enterprise hold. Roll five."

Tib breathed slowly through his nose as he waited for the roll of the dice. Then he remembered seven was the most common roll. His stomach heaved, but he kept his breathing steady.

"Five. Granted."

Tib's stomach cramped. His head pounded. "Engineering. Prepare Romulan drones for launch. Ambush attack on Klingon battlecruisers."

Tib programmed instructions for the drones, and directed the Enterprise to move outside the Zone by the Maru. The Klingons followed his ship. Two Klingon ships were disabled by the drones, then a third. The drones homed in on the remaining battlecruisers.

Tib contacted the Klingons. "Captain Tiberius Kirk of the Enterprise here. We offer assistance against the Romulan drones, in return for safe passage for the Kobayashi Maru and the Enterprise."

After dickering, the Klingons accepted. The Enterprise shot down the drones. The Klingons departed, and the crew and passengers of the Maru boarded the Enterprise.

"Test completed. Pass," said Setbo. "Congratulations."

Tib saluted. His head felt like it would split.