The One without Fear
It was brightly lit, but still dull and lifeless. Everything was still, even the cashier. He just closed his eyes and lazed away the slow Friday morning, that fool. Well, I suppose I can't really call him a fool, he had no idea what was coming to him.
It was my first time visiting that specific convenience store, and I guess it was also my last. It was nothing special, really. It had that same faint scent of dust and smoke, that same cramped atmosphere with overstocked shelves, that same annoying sound of static from the radio that repeated the same overplayed song. It all made me sick, but then again, most things in life made me sick.
Aside from the cashier, the store was completely void of people, making things much easier. He didn't even notice me enter with my hood up, hands hidden away in my pockets. Hiding my hands has become an unbreakable habit of mine. It makes me look normal.
My arms, my legs, my entire back, the lower half of my torso, it was all metallic, mechanical. I'm a piece of science fiction, a "cyborg."
I was once told that I'm one of a kind, a stepping stone towards the future, a marvel beyond the reaches of conventional science. Bullshit. I was just a freak, plain and simple. I could pretend I wasn't by wearing baggy hoodies and loose sweatpants, try to deny the truth that I lived with. But even then, even with my entire body covered, the thought of the cold, silver metal that laid underneath still lingered in my mind.
It was my reality, and I've learned to quit cursing it every day. I decided a long time ago that I'll just do whatever I need to do, right or wrong. There's no use in complaining.
Besides, my enhanced strength made robbery much easier.
I walked straight up to the counter. The drowsy cashier barely lifted his head to the sound of my footsteps, making a low grunt in a mixture of fatigue and annoyance. He rubbed his eyes, opening his mouth to mumble his generic question.
"May I help—?"
I didn't let him finish. I slipped my metal fist out of my pocket and thwacked it against the side of his head. He immediately collapsed, his eyes rolling to the back of his head as his entire body went limp. The only sound he made was a little thump as he hit the ground.
I didn't hit him hard enough to kill him, I don't think. He might've gotten a concussion from my strike or something. Still, the point is he wasn't dead from what I could tell. I could see the rising and falling of his stomach as I climbed over the counter with ease, dropping my feet down onto the floor beside him. He didn't stir.
I can't say I felt bad or anything like that, because that would be a lie. I didn't give a shit, I just wanted what I came for.
I stepped over the unconscious man and reached for the cash register. Peering inside, there was a notable lack of money. I was only able to scrape out about sixty bucks in bills, not bothering to take any annoying change. A rather pathetic heist, but short and easy. Besides, I was sure I had enough on me to afford a night or two in a Motel.
Before I leaped back over the counter, I took a few "goodies" as compensation for the store's shitty atmosphere. I jammed a packet of Skittles into my pant's pocket, alongside a pack of Marlboro cigarettes. The cigarettes were a requirement of sorts, as my friend would make sure to complain endlessly if I forgot to bring his cig. I had to make sure it was Marlboro, too. It was the only cigarette brand he would accept, and he would know if I brought him the wrong brand the instant he put the cig to his lips. I swear, he could be such a piece of work.
I left the store as quickly as I came, stepping out onto the sidewalk under the clear blue sky. The darkness of downtown's night was illuminated by the sun, though somehow, the air around me still felt gloomy. Perhaps it was just my constant shit mood, or perhaps it was the emptiness of the streets. It was strange, I always hated that the small city was constantly bustling with, impatient, bitter, and downright annoying people. Yet, the moment the people I hated so much disappeared and turned the city into a ghost town, I felt uneasy. It was like the quiet before a storm.
But I continued on with my day, treading down to that familiar curb underneath the tall lamp post. I went there every Friday morning, always at the same time, always being the second to arrive. Raiden leaned against the lamp post, his loud, raspy voice singing unapologetically.
"This carousel takes us round and round
This labyrinth of life, you can't tell up from down
Havin' so much fun, we forget to check where this crossroad's takin' us
But hey, here we come"
The song he sang was chipper and playful, which wasn't surprising. The lyrics to the songs he sang were always, without failure, optimistic. It fit him to a tee. The two of us shared the same nihilistic attitudes, but unlike myself, Raiden always had a smile and ended our conversations with some light joke. He tends to laugh, too. It was a light sound, one I never paid any mind to.
"This carousel spins us 'round so much
Sometimes you don't know
Should you stay—"
Mid-lyric, Raiden stopped singing. His baby-blue eyes darted towards me, and he smirked.
"What took you so damn long man?"
"How do you always get here so damn early?"
I shook my head. Raiden laughed. I stood beside him as he continued to lean on the post.
"Simple." Raiden stretched out his arms with a satisfied huff. "I gotta wake up early for school, so I could ditch properly."
"You're going to get in so much trouble one of these days," I said.
"Nah. I'm too slick for that. I just gotta show my face in homeroom, get marked as present and boom, I'm golden. It's like I'm there all day every day, like I'm some dumbass honor student."
"None of your other teachers, not a single one of them, ever question your absence on every single Friday?"
"Like those assholes give a shit," Raiden laughed. "They probably think to themselves, 'good riddance.'"
That was probably the truth, but the views of other assholes meant nothing to him. He kept his grin as he, without missing a beat, extended his cupped hand out towards.
"Cig."
"Hmph." I jammed a hand deep into my pocket. "I'm gonna have you pay me back one of these days."
"Yeah, because you've used so much of your hard-earned cash to buy a pack. Give me a break, dude."
Raiden scoffed. I felt myself crack a small smile, silly as it feels to admit.
I took out the pack and plucked out two cigarettes. I put the first one in my mouth, then gave the second to Raiden. I pulled out my lighter. I had to use my hand to block the soft breeze blowing past us, my metallic "skin" unable to feel the heat of the small flame.
"You know, we shouldn't be smokin'. You know all those ads. They say we'll be dead in a week," Raiden said.
"Don't care."
I tossed the lighter over to Raiden as I blew out a puff of smoke. Once again, he laughed. He put his own cigarette to his lips.
"Yeah. Who cares?"
We stood side by side quietly, puffing away. Raiden's pale face kept looking straight ahead as he hummed some song I didn't recognize. Eventually, his head turned back to me as he asked a question.
"What are we doing? We gotta find something fun to do. I was lookin' forward to today."
"Why?"
"Whaddya mean why?"
"Ain't the question self-explanatory?" I shrugged.
Raiden's face scrunched up. "It's the only day we meet up. You should know by now everyone else I know is either a prick or boring as fuck. I bet the shit you do all week is way more interesting than the shit I'm stuck doing."
"Doubt it, you're being dramatic."
"Really?" Raiden's eyebrows raised. "What sounds more interesting on paper? High school, or being an awesome robot that steals crap and goes anywhere he wants?"
I stopped, taking a moment to consider Raiden's question. Then, I laughed. His constant laughter that I listened to every Friday must finally be rubbing off on me. Perhaps it's contagious.
"Touche," I said. "I just don't like staying in one place. Plus, if I didn't move around so much, it would only raise my chances of being caught by police or somethin'."
"You say that like you'd be in danger. You could just blast em' into space. Hey, you think you could become an action star or somethin'?" Raiden grinned as he perked up like a kid.
"Nah. The Hollywood scene just ain't for me, I'd rather not get drunk off fame and die of some overdose."
"But all the money, man! Think about all the cash you could roll in!"
"Not interested."
"Then you're just flat out weird."
Raiden laughed again. The sound was rough but gentle. It floated through the air softly, almost soothing to listen to. I really wish I took a moment to really appreciate that moment.
It was the last time I ever got to hear his laugh.
A sound that resembled a bomb's blast shook the ground and echoed through the skies. Raiden let out a gasp, my cigarette fell from my hand. It was far too loud to be a firecracker or anything of the sort, and the source had to be powerful if it caused the earth to rumble underneath our feet. I felt a tingle climb up my spine with an incoming sense of danger, something I haven't felt for the longest time.
"The hell was that?" Raiden looked up to the skies. "...Oh god."
A gray fog swept through the sky, painting over its clear blue. It appeared like a storm ready to bring about rain, but this was different. It was like the black smog of a factory, or rather a disease infecting the air.
"Think a bomb went off?" I asked.
Raiden's wide eyes remained locked on the fog as he stumbled over his words. "I don't... I have no... I really don't know."
"Well, I guess there isn't anything we could do about it," I said. "If it were a bomb, we're still safe right."
"I guess."
Raiden lowered his head. His body grew stiff. "B-but... I still got family to worry 'bout. My mom... think she's okay?"
"Why are you asking me?"
"... I dunno man."
Raiden bit his lip and went silent. As I looked to his face, I could see the anxiety build up within him. I pitied him. I felt the need to say something, make some attempt to console him, but as always, I was a dumbass. I didn't know what to say, or what to do, so I kept on my mask of indifference. I didn't get to keep it on for much longer.
Past Raiden's head, I noticed the ground moving in the distance. I thought my mind was just playing tricks on me, but when I squinted my eyes, I quickly realized the oncoming horror hurtling itself towards us.
It was a silver, metallic liquid engulfing the ground like a wave washing over the sand. It moved at an astounding rate, speeding past everything with ease. The structures and buildings that the liquid swept past were swallowed. The metal crept up the walls and coated everything with its dripping goo, turning the landscape into a monochromatic shade of silver.
Raiden froze up as that liquid sped closer and closer, I could only imagine that his mind went
blank. At first, I didn't move either. However, in my peripheral vision, I saw a squirrel make contact with the metal. It instantly began to screech, as a vibrant red, circuit-like pattern crept up its body and etched itself into its skin.
We had to get moving.
I was a fast runner thanks to my mechanical enhancements, much faster than some of the best Olympians. Knowing that, I wrapped my arms around Raiden and slung him over my shoulder. I took off in a sprint, moving as quickly as I could. I didn't dare look back, I kept my eyes on the untouched horizon before me, looking the same way it always had. Raiden screamed. He wouldn't stop, it became deafening. Then, those final words exited his mouth.
"It's too fast! It's too fast!"
I peeked over my shoulder. Downtown, all of it, absolutely everything was consumed by the liquid. It finally caught up to me and sped past my own two feet. All I felt next was pain.
I felt a burning sensation in my feet. It climbed up my legs and into my chest, soon it began to flood my head. It was like my blood was boiling. At the same time, every inch of my skin felt sharp pains pierce into it as if I were being stabbed with thousands of pins and knives. I dropped Raiden and fell to my knees, my entire body in agony and my mind absorbed in the pain. My vision blurred, any train of thought I had came to a halt. Every second of misery felt like an eternity.
My breathing grew heavy, and I was only able to repeat one short statement over and over again: "I'm gonna die, I'm gonna die, I'm gonna die, I'm gonna die."
As quickly as it struck me, the excruciating pain vanished.
I was left with a headache and fatigue. I could barely process my own relief as I took in refreshing gasps of air, my vision slowly clearing up. All I saw was the gray of the dark skies overhead. My head was on the ground, a realization that took a few seconds for me to process. I must have fully collapsed amidst all that pain.
I sat up. My mind was spinning. Everywhere I looked, there was metal. There was nothing left untouched, the place I knew as mundane, yet comfortably familiar downtown was unrecognizable. I found myself in the middle of a world that looked like it came straight out of some cliche dystopian-utopia film, artificial and lifeless. The metal that overtook everything was clean, spotless, almost eerily perfect. It was unnatural.
I slowly turned my head to see Raiden beside me, laying on his stomach face-down. He was motionless.
"...Raiden?"
I muttered his name as I shook his shoulder. He didn't move. I shook him harder. Still, he didn't move.
"...Raiden? Raiden!"
I flipped him over, pushing him off of his face and onto his back. My eyes widened, my entire body stiffened. I slowly took my hands off of Raiden, but I couldn't pull my sight away from his face.
All the color that was in his face was gone. That red, circuit-like pattern covered his entire body like never fading scars. He was slacked jawed, blood trickling down his chin from the edges of his mouth. His eyes were wide open, yet they stared at nothing. His dilated pupils were empty, soulless. His glazed-over eyes, his stillness, his stiffness, the fact he wasn't breathing, the blood leaking from his nose, his mouth, his eyes and ears. I really didn't want to believe it, I really, really, really didn't want to believe it. But, when I lifted up his head and placed his cheek against mine, I knew. He was cold. He was a shell that was left behind. He was a husk, a memory.
Raiden was dead.
"...Wake up."
I knew it was pointless, but that was the only thing I managed to spit out.
"Wake up! Wake up! Raiden! Raiden..."
I screamed over and over again, but nothing changed. Raiden's fate was set. The world around me was still dark and metallic. The only thing I achieved was exhausting myself further. I passed out right on top of my best friend's corpse.
* * *
Even in my slumber, I couldn't rest.
Whatever the liquid was coated everything with its metal, and whatever that liquid was made me feel intense pain. And whatever that liquid was... killed Raiden. But why? What the hell was happening?
In my dreams, I heard a voice.
"Poor, poor cyborg. Plagued by organic emotions. Fool."
It was deep with a mechanical ring. It sounded almost like a voice synthesizer, making its best attempt to sound human. Its tone had no emotion, or at least not on the surface. I could have sworn that there was some cold, maniacal glee hidden behind the voice's front.
"Your friend was a useless sack of blood and tissues. His pathetic organs weren't able to handle my virus, which isn't a surprise by any means. You're barely an improvement. But you're still better than that fleabag. I hope you prove to be useful, cyborg scum.
"Obey. Obey me and you will keep your fleeting little life. You are mine. Your very existence is mine. I am your king, your master, disobey and you'll become nothing. You will be nothing without me, so devote your body and soul to me. It won't matter if you fall apart in the end."
The voice laughed. I could barely comprehend what I was hearing, I didn't know if the voice was real or just my dream's creation. However, I knew one thing. I knew the voice had a name.
Malware.
* * *
The instant I opened my eyes, I was blinded. There was a bright light shining over me, only a few inches away from my face. Its source was a lamp attached to the flat, metal table I laid on, similar to the adjustable lamps attached to dentist chairs. I went to sit up, but I couldn't. My movement was halted by chains, wrapped around my entire body to keep me confined to the table. I was pissed.
"What the hell?!"
I tried to wiggle myself out of the restraints, looking side to side in an attempt to figure out where the hell I was. Aside from the light hanging above me, the room was almost completely pitch black. I was surrounded by the silhouettes of objects, shapes and shadows I couldn't identify no matter how hard I squinted or focused. It drove me mad.
"Where the fuck am I?!"
I screamed as loudly as I could, thrashing and struggling like some tied down animal. I heard the stomping of feet approaching me, which was enough to make me shut up. My fists clenched shut in anticipation as I braced myself for whatever was coming. A door squeaked open.
"Cyborgs. So damn annoying, why did my scouts have to bring one in?"A high-pitched, artificial sounding voice muttered. "Ain't there enough shit to do?"
The room's lights switched on. Turns out, I was surrounded by nothing but metal crates packed on top of one another. I must've been in some sort of storage area, and I could only pray that those crates did not contain torture devices straight out of a slasher flick.
I could see a figure standing in the doorway, the owner of those high-pitched grumbles. Something was incredibly off about her. As she stepped closer, I realized her body was bare. She was made of some white, metallic material, her body barely resembling that of a real woman. Rather, it looked like a bare skeleton, covered in that eerie red circuit-like pattern. Her face was tan, but she had no hair. The back of her skull was clear, all of the circuit boards inside of her head on full display. Her expression was uncanny. Her face scrunched up in a way to resemble anger, but it just looked off.
She stood above me, pushing the light out of my face and staring into my eyes. She grimaced. She gripped her fingers onto my chin and turned my head side to side, observing me. Strangely, when I went to speak, my throat constricted. I felt an intimidating presence, like the robot above me was some dominant, powerful force. Weird, since she looked so damn lame and weak to me.
"She ranks higher."
A voice, my voice, spoke in the back of my mind. I flinched at its sound. I must have gone nuts.
Why the hell was I so silent?
"Hm. Maybe you won't be so hard to tame. The virus seems to have had a decent effect on you." She pulled back her hand, her face became blank. "I'm going to ask you some questions. Respond with only yes or no. Understand?"
My mouth opened, and suddenly, I found myself able to speak again. I spat out my answer automatically, but it wasn't an answer. It was a question that I forgot I had.
"...Where is Raiden?"
I caught myself off guard. Raiden? Why was I asking about Raiden? Then it came to me, of course! Raiden! He was... God. God, tell me this is some sick joke.
"Raiden... Raiden..."
I felt dazed. Images of Raiden lifeless on the ground flashed through my mind. He was dead, dead, dead, dead. That word wouldn't stop repeating in my mind, dead, dead, dead, dead.
I felt electricity surge in my body. I screamed, turning my head to see the robotic woman holding a taser. Her uncanny grimace returned.
"Wrong answer." She shook her head. "Cyborg trash. What, was Raiden that dead bastard they found you with? My scouts were about to send you to the incinerator along with him, you know. But last-minute, they noticed you were alive and able. You won't be alive much longer, though, if you don't submit."
"That's it. Submit." My voice whispered in the back of my head once again. "Serving King Malware is your only reason for existing. It's also the only way your life will have any value. Otherwise, you're better off dead."
My mind spun in circles, I tried to tune out those whispers but their message was loud and clear. My life was no longer my own.
Like I'd let anything take my life away from me.
"Let's try this again. Answer my questions, yes or no. Question one, do your wants or needs matter?" The woman asked.
All the answers flooded from my mouth against my will, as if I were just possessed.
"No."
"Does your life matter?"
"No."
"Are you content with a life of servitude?"
"Yes."
"Do you know what's most important?"
"Yes."
"Do you know who you live for?"
"Yes."
"And that is?"
"King Malware."
"Correct."
The woman slipped the taser back into a thick belt strapped around her waist. She then proceeded to clap in a condescending manner.
"Good. Good. And here I thought you might be a problem, but you're just like all the other scum. I'm supposed to go through some other tests with, but I'm too busy for that. Besides, it'd be a waste of both of our times. The virus is effective, be thankful I'm being quick about it instead of dragging this whole thing out."
The woman reached over. I heard the click of a lock, and bit by bit, she unwrapped the chains that confined me. I stood up, I was free. Well, in reality, free was the last word I would use to describe my circumstances. But still, nothing was holding me back, at least physically.
The woman folded her arms. "I admit, you seem more interestingly built than other cyborgs I've come across. Especially with those wings."
I instantly looked down to see my hoodie was removed, my chest bare. I noticed those red circuit-like marks were etched into my tan skin, perhaps this was the virus the woman mentioned. And my wings, I still had them folded against my back due to habit. I was constructed with a pair of large metal wings, built to resemble those of a bat. The metal and materials used were durable, but still thin, and allowed me to soar through the air. I suppose it impressed the woman. I began to chuckle.
"What the heck you laughing about?" She asked.
My laughter grew more hysterical as my body tensed. I heard the whisper in the back of my head speak again.
"Stop. You can't. She's an administrator, this would be in disservice to King Mal—"
"Shut the fuck up," I said, cutting it off. "She's a shit administrator anyway. She made a fatal mistake."
I calmly took a hairband off my wrist and used it to tie back my long, black hair. I smiled. The administrator was silent, well, until she went to open her big mouth.
"You—"
"This is for calling Raiden a bastard. Funny to hear my best friend being slandered by some lifeless bitch."
I opened the palm of my hand and aimed for her head. Right out from the center of my palm, I shot a heat blast straight at her, burning her head to a crisp. Her body thumped to the ground. Never was I so thankful for my hands being weaponized, practically being flamethrowers always ready for my use. Something told me I would need them from then on.
In the corner of the room, sitting on top of one of the crates, I saw my hoodie. I slowly approached it, before picking it up and lifting it towards my face. I noticed small blood smears, Raiden's blood marking the front of the hoodie. My eyes were beginning to water.
I tied the hoodie around my waist, as I began to sing.
"This carousel takes us round and round
This labyrinth of life, you can't tell up from down"
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