So, this chapter is just a flashback of what happened with Gemma (: I thought I'd give you guys more of a visual of it, but the words that are bolded are supposed to emphasize how Chloe feels and such.  I know Gemma's hair wasn't blonde back then, but just pretend c; Enjoy<3

(Song for chapter - Mad World by Gary Jules)

----------------------------- 

Chapter 14 – Harry's P.O.V.

            "Harry, is your sister okay?" Nathan questioned as he glanced over at Gemma who was nervously scanning the crowded beach with anxious eyes.

            I sighed, shrugging. "I don't know. She's never okay anymore."

            "Aren't you scared of her? I mean... she talks to herself, mate," Mikey pointed out as he frowned at the sight of the timid girl.

            I swatted his shoulder. "Oi! She's not scary, she's just... different. She has a different mindset than we do, that's all."

            "Don't you miss her being normal?" Nathan asked.

            "Of course I do, but I love her all the same."

            "What made her that way?" Mikey pestered.

            "I don't know, all right?" I shouted, groaning with the topic as I sank further into the water to where it was above my shoulders. I glanced over at Gemma who was nervously fuddling with her hands, her chest heaving breaths as she continued to skim the area, as if looking for predators. I looked back at my two mates. "Can we please not talk about her on my birthday?"

            "Right. Sorry, mate." Nathan shook his head to himself.

            "Curiosity killed the cat," Mikey added.

            "I'm going to kill you if you don't shut that bloody trap of yours," I joked with a small smile as Mikey rolled his eyes, playfully punching my shoulder.

            "Do you see blood on this trap? I don't think so, Harold," he sassed.

            I rolled my eyes at the use of my real name, but I also didn't bother explaining to him that it was an expression. Mikey moved to Holmes Chapel all but six months ago from a small town in Virginia back in the USA. Apparently his father had a job transfer (I haven't exactly paid attention to the many times he's told the story), so they packed up their things as a family and high-tailed out of there. I've always wanted to visit America, but with Gemma being so diffident, Mum said it wasn't the best idea to get her on a plane for over six hours.

            My family had to quit doing a lot of things ever since Gemma came entered this foggy state she seems to be engulfed in. We have to eat at certain restaurants where the music isn't too loud, and the food isn't too greasy. We also have to plan our vacations around her (many) therapy sessions, so that puts us at roughly three vacations a year. Gemma has to visit Dr. Martin three times a week, but she goes through these fits sometimes where they put her in the rehabilitation center for a couple of days to get her wound down. I don't like seeing Gemma suffer like this, and I also don't like missing out on the vacations we'd always take. I just wished she was her normal self again; the one that would always play with me.

            Sister or not, I used to tell Gemma every single thing going on in my life. She was my own living secret book holder, keeping her lips zipped closed when need be. I loved her—I still love her—I just love the old her more. I hate sounding like that, I really do, but it's only the truth.

            "Harry!" Mum hollered from the shore, her petite hands cupping around her mouth to magnify her voice.

            "Yeah?" I yelled back, squinting to see her through the sun.

            She pointed to Gemma. "I'm going to the restroom. Keep an eye out on your sister for me, yeah?"

            "Will do," I responded and rose a thumbs up in the air.

            Mum sent me a smile before she started making her way through the sand and over in the bathroom area.

            "Is it cool to babysit your older sister?" Mikey asked.

            I rolled my eyes, not bothering to even answer his question. Mikey was full of curiosity, always wanting more and more information. Nathan could be the same, but he knew when to close his mouth and when to open it. Talking about Gemma is a sore subject for me, so I try to keep away from it the best I can. Nathan seems to get the hint when I'm tired of talking about it, but Mikey doesn't seem to have that little sensor in his head that tells him to shut up.

            "Harold! It's your birthday!" Nathan sang as him and Mikey exchanged devious glances, then they both tackled me in a hug under the water.

            We all came up laughing, me trying to be stern as I flipped my now dripping curls out of my face, pushing them carelessly to the side. I tried to scold them for doing that, but it turned into a laughing fit full with splashing water at each other. My mind was too occupied on the splashing game that I forgot all about Gemma sitting alone on the shore. Mum should be back by now, though, right?

            As if to prove my assumptions correct, Mum's voice was bellowing out to me again as she hollered my name.

            I turned to look at her, wiping my eyes from the saltwater as I raised my other hand to stop the boys. They did so, but when my eyes roamed the shore for the familiar blonde hair; it was nowhere in sight. Mum was standing by Gemma's chair, frantically looking around it as if Gemma may be playing hide and seek. Naturally, I started to run out the water, trying to avoid being knocked down by the small but forceful waves. My best friends were hot on my trail.

            "Oh my goodness! Gemma's gone! Where did she go?" Mum panicked as she fumbled with everything; the ice chest, the lounge chairs, the towels, and even the chip bags. But this was Gemma we were talking about; who knows where she went?

            "M-Mum, I'm so sorry. I-I was..." I stammered on the words as I felt a lump of tears forming in the middle of my throat, blocking my breathing.

            "Harry, it isn't your fault, dear. Even if you saw her leave, you wouldn't have gotten to her in time," Mum assured me as she wrapped a towel around her waist. "We need to go ask the staff members if they've seen her."

            "They know about her... mental illness?" Mikey asked as we followed my mother—very quickly—up the patio stairs and towards the hotel.

            "Yes, I made sure to tell them when we got here just in case something like this happened. You can never be too sure," Mum rambled as she swung open the door.

            The three of us boys didn't seem to care that we were shirtless and dripping with water as we followed my Mum frantically through the lobby. We almost slipped a couple of times, but we managed to catch ourselves before our bums hit the hard surface of the tile floor.

            Nonetheless, we made it to the desk where Mum started quickly asking questions. The woman looked petrified for us as she shook her head, fumbling around on her desk and picking up the phone. I heard her mumbling something about a crazy and insane girl roaming the halls, and if anyone has seen her. I didn't like how that lady labeled Gemma as insane. Gemma can't help who she became.

            Still, she sets down the phone slowly and gently shakes her head to tell us she found no kind of information. Mum was beyond panicking at this point, pressing her hand to her chest as she dialed the police on her phone, reporting a missing person. While Mum was going through all of that, the lads and I thought we'd search around the pool area. Who knows? Maybe she found a friend of some sort and they're both hanging around the area like normal teenagers. It's be nice to see Gemma with a friend again, something normal in her shining through. I missed coming home to find Gemma in the kitchen with Caroline; her best girlfriend since grade school. I missed seeing the normal Gemma, but now I'm missing the distressed one more.

            With no luck whatsoever down on the patio or around the pool, we go back inside and I'm on the verge of tears. Mum says we should all just go upstairs and get changed so we can go down to the police station and identify her for the police to search. We solemnly agree, me refusing to speak for I don't trust my voice at the moment. I feel too vulnerable to even part my lips for words to escape.

            "It's all right, mate. We'll find her," Nathan said as he patted my shoulder soothingly, seeming to realize that I was having a difficult time processing this.

            "Thanks," I murmured under my breath, trying my best not to cry.

            What kind of man cries in front of his friends? I may only be turning fifteen, but I know my limits.

            The elevator doors slid open on our floor, all of us piling out slowly as if none of us were motivated to move. I wasn't in the mood for any of this right now; it was my birthday, after all. I should still be down at the beach with my best mates, doing absolutely pointless things, but enjoying it all the same. Gemma would still be down there, but she'd be normal this time. Her bright eyes would twinkle at me from the shore as she would wave and I would wave back. She'd join us in the water, ruffling my hair playfully like she always used to do. We'd share more of our insides jokes and laugh about nothing; but I would devour every second of it.

            I'd do anything to have my sister back.

            Entering the hotel room was a sight I wish I never saw. There she was, my precious, troubled sister. On the floor with a bloody knife in her left hand, another jabbing through her stomach. Her dyed blonde hair fanned out around her face on the bloodstained floor, giving the impression of just how frail her body was. Slits covered her arms, her neck, her cheeks. They were everywhere and anywhere, all leaving a tainted mark that I'll never be able to un-see.

            Mum's gasp was the first sound that filled the room, her hand flying up to cover her mouth as tears naturally fled from her eyes immediately. I didn't know what to think, how to process it. I just stared and stared, trying to take in the fact that my sister had down so many horrendous things to herself; suicide now being one.

            I hadn't realized tears were silently flowing down my cheeks until I felt the wetness hitting my bare chest. Mikey and Nathan seemed to be invisible to me at the moment, although I knew they were more than freaked out by the way they backed out the room in pure terror.

            I didn't care about them at the moment, all I cared about was Gemma. My beautiful, beautiful sister that left me on my fifteenth birthday; leaving nothing but a suicide note about how sorry she was for being insane.

*VOTE. COMMENT. SHARE.* ;)