Peter Parker Passing the Fuck Out Part 2: What even are secret identies?
Not edited lmfao
"The— they're gonna blow up the building," Spider-man's voice came out strangled, gasping, terrified. His face, because yes, they'd taken off the mask, was contorted in a sort of pain and fear.
Daredevil was pacing the length of the room, shaking his head to himself. They'd taken Spider-man to Claire's apartment but she wasn't home, so they were on their own. There goes that plan.
Deadpool was crouched next to the couch where spider-man was laid out. "Fuck." He leaned his news back and groaned. "Fuck." He was annoyed at all of this. Together they'd managed to stop the bleeding, but spider-man was still dealing with several broken bones, some shrapnel wounds, a bullet wound that seemed a few days old (but then again he is does have superhuman abilities), and probably a concussion. And by the looks of the sweat dripping down his bloodstained face, a fever too.
"Should we, I don't know, throw him in the tub?" Deadpool asked a few minutes later, noting how the fever was just getting worse.
"She's not answering." Daredevil scowled, putting his phone down.
"Throw him out the window and see if the shock brings him back?" Deadpool jokes.
Daredevil turns. Deadpool holds up his hands, "I'm kidding."
"I can't— I can't—" Spider-man muttered, twisting and turning. "I have to save—..."
Daredevil moved forward. "Help me hold him down, moving makes it worse." He ordered Deadpool as Spider-man grew more frantic in his delirious sleep. Deadpool didn't agree, moving with Daredevil to hold down Spider-man.
"Jesus Christ I forgot how strong he is." Deadpool exclaimed. "It's almost like the MCU doesn't portray his strength very often."
Between the both of them they managed to pin down his limbs, mostly due to his weakened place.
"Spider-man, calm down." Daredevil said as the hero struggled in his state. Not entirely unconscious, but definitely not lucid.
"If he dies on us, can you imagine how New York would react?" Deadpool said, lifting Spider-man up. Daredevil had run a cold bath, dumped any ice he could find into it. Neither Deadpool nor wade were men of science, so they were kind of just winging it.
"The author doesn't know shit, either. That's why everything has been incredibly vague." Deadpool whispered. Daredevil didn't hear him.
"Just— come on, let's not let it come to that." Matt said, beckoning with his head towards the bathroom. Wade obliged, carrying the incapacitated Spider-man in. The pulled his suit off, leaving Spider-man in just his boxes, and they lifted him into the tub.
Spider-man gasped awake, eyes widening as he did that gasp you get when you get hit with really cold water, and he struggled.
"Hey, hey, easy!" Daredevil said, pushing him back down into the water as he tried to get up and or fight them.
"You're fine!" Deadpool added. "Kind of."
Spider-man settled, and his eyes began to close. "Oh. Okay."
"No no, stay with us." Daredevil snapped. No response.
Wade gave Spider-Man a few taps on the checks, but he didn't respond. "Well those two seconds were worth it." Wade said sarcastically.
"It's... we just need to give him time, I think the water will help." Daredevil sighed.
"Alright. Well I'm going to raid the alcohol. You make sure he doesn't drown in his sleep like a loser." Wade said, walking out. "The author can't be bothered coming up with anything culturally relevant or anything remotely funny, so 'loser' it is."
Peter winced as he came too, feeling his head pounding. He raised his left arm to his forehead and winced at the pain that shoots through him. His fingers find his forehead and he pushes his hair aside, shifting to sit up on the couch.
It takes him a second. Forehead. Hair. No mask. NO MASK.
He flinches, eyes shooting open as he finally realises he's in an unfamiliar place. Vague memories flash in his mind of an explosion, running, and then running into...
His eyes catch on a figure leaning gassing the far wall, watching him.
"Daredevil?"
The person moves forward, "Guess again, webs!"
Peter's eyes widen. Deadpool. He'd heard of him, never saw him in person. "Deadpool. Uh!" Peter panicked slightly. He'd heard how dangerous and erratic Deadpool was.
"Scared?" Deadpool asked in a steady, intimidating voice.
"Wade, that's not funny." Another voice said as a man walked into the room carrying a glass of water. Daredevil, still dressed in his suit, but he didn't have a helmet on anymore. "How are you feeling, Spider-man?" He asked calmly, nodding at him.
The room was low lit, which Peter was thankful for because if he had any strong lights in his face right now he didn't think he'd be able to cope.
"Well... not great." Peter admitted, "But better?"
"You weren't in great state." Daredevil said, offering the water. "But we did what we could."
Peter took the glass and recalled a faint memory of water, icy cold. "Was I in water at some point?"
"Yeah, I dunked your head in the toilet." Deadpool said.
Peter's eyes widened again and he took a sip of the water, which cooled his throat and made his voice clearer as he spoke up. "You what?"
"No he did not." Daredevil snapped. "We had you in the bath, you were running a bad temperature."
Peter sighed in relief. "Oh, okay. Well, um, thank you." He realised he was dressed in a shirt and some trackies (i forget the name) he didn't recognise. "Uh, where's my suit?"
"It's here," Daredevil walked over to a table and picked up the folded suit, the mask sitting on top. "We has to take it off because you were, y'know."
"Dying." Deadpool added brightly.
Peter swallowed nervously and Daredevil pressed the suit into his hands. He didn't know what to make of all this. He hated that he was unmasked, identity compromised. But he also know that they did it to help him.
Daredevil crouched on the ground and cleared his throat, looking somewhere off in the distance. "So, are we gonna talk about this?"
Peter winced. He really owed this guys his life. "Look, I really appreciate the help but I don't deserve..."
"I know what you're thinking, kid. Stop." Daredevil shook his head, tone firm.
"Never try to say that shit in front of me again." Deadpool added. "Of course you fucking deserve help, you're Spider-man."
"Oh..." Peter murmured. So they didn't think he was, like, a burden for inconveniencing them?
"Hey, us vigilantes need to look out for each other." Daredevil's mouth curled up in a smile, and Peter returned it. He's been alone ever since he started as Spider-man, he's always wanted to talk to other supers, but he didn't know how. There was Tony, of course, but he hadn't seen him since the whole vulture fiasco.
"How old are you, kid?"
"Um..." Peter considered not answering, but then he sighed. "I'm sixteen."
Daredevil stilled, took a slow breath in.
"You got people? Who should know, that uh, you're okay?" Daredevil spoke up again slowly, carefully choosing his words.
"My Aunt's probably called the police by now... she doesn't know I..." Peter sighed, trailing off. He'd wanted to tell May, really, but she's been through so much.
"Does anyone know?" Deadpool asked. "Or are you the Lone wolf type, all mysteries and dark, parading around talking about vengeance."
"Not many people." Peter responded, not getting specific. He didn't want to compromise Ned's safety like that.
Daredevil sighed. "Alright kid. You got a name?"
"...yes."
"Are you going to share with the class?"
"No, sir." Peter whispered. "I should be going."
"Damn, there goes my dreams for team red." Deadpool muttered.
"I'll drop it, I get it. I don't parade my identity around, either." Daredevil assurer him.
"Well I know your identity." Deadpool told Daredevil.
"Well no shit," Daredevil rolled his eyes. Deadpool had been a pain in his ass for over a year now. "You send my work Christmas cards."
"That's a normal thing to do."
"Not when you address it to Daredevil."
Peter cracked a smile at that. He didn't know much about either of these vigilantes, but they didn't seem so bad. In their own way.
"So, what happened? How'd you get caught up in an explosion? And In Hell's Kitchen, too?" Daredevil asked a few minutes of silence later.
"I've been tailing a small gang's activity over the last few nights. They were gathering weapons and explosives, planned to go bomb one of their enemy gang's places. I caught them rigging the place, and fought them. They set them off."
"With all of them still in there?" Daredevil asked.
"Most of them. I went back in to try and—and save them. Turned out it was a trap to set more off." Peter explained, feeling kind of numb. Who would gamble human lives like that? Yes they're were dodgy, but they had families, lives, outside of the crime.
"That sucks." Deadpool whistles. "Upping the guilt, huh?"
"Wade." Daredevil hissed.
Peter shrugged. "It's fine. He's not wrong." He then looked up. "You called him Wade."
"Damn it, Matt." Deadpool groaned dramatically as he tossed his head back. "Exposing me like that."
Daredevil scowled at Deadpool—Wade. "Fuck you."
Wade waved him off. "It's fine, there's tons of Matt's in the city, calm down Murdock!"
Daredevil stood up and punched Deadpool across the face. The room stayed silent.
Peter stared at the two, "...My name's Peter."
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