L I B E R T Y   K I N G S

The sounds of the sea wave crashing on big rocks are sending my heart into serenity. The salty sea smell of the wind against my face makes me close my eyes, as I open the window of my car. They say we can find our real direction in the waves. I also believed in that because we can never be lost when we learn how deep the dark blue sea. When you were once lost in the blue of the sea, you'll always know how to get back.

In my situation, I'm so lost in the deep blue sea in my life. I'm still where all the blue shades are shining, and being here isn't that bad. 

I'm able to go to Lobo, Batangas today because I sneaked out of our rest house. My Mom had something to do in Manila para sa mga natitira naming assets dito sa Pilipinas. We may not have our own house here but we still do have enough assets. Mukhang isa rin sa dahilan ng pag-uwi ni Mom ang pag-aayos ng mga iyon. I think my tita's and tito's asked my Mom to talk to our family lawyer. Kaya I'm able to travel papunta kung nasaan sila Prim and Olivia.

Of course, hindi ko sinabi ito kahit kay Oliver. I know he would not like the idea. Kaya nga siya ang umaayos lahat ng problems kahit hindi naman niya rapat saluhin nang mag-isa. I'm here, I should also deal with the problems that we both made. 

I sigh and caress my tummy. Baby, we will meet and talk to your Ate Oly. I hope we can reach out to her heart. I bite my lower lip as I remember her face when she heard that I'm pregnant. How her mouth set in a hard line and her face harden as fury poured through Olivia. I hate the fact that it's me and her dad who is the cause of it. I hate it so much.

But that is one of the consequences. 

The car stopped absurdly making me wake up from my deep thoughts. I nervously look at Manong driver, he just gave me an apologetic smile while scratching the back of his head.

"Sorry po, Ma'am. Malalim po pala kasi 'yung butas sa daan kaya biglang napahinto."

"Kindly, slow down na lang po."

Muling nagpaumanhin si Manong at nagpatuloy na muli sa pag-drive. Hinaplos ko ang aking tiyan dahil sa nangyaring biglaang pagpreno. Are you okay, Baby? Kinabahan talaga ako dahil may kaselanan na ngayon ang aking lagay. I don't want to lose my baby and I want my child to have a better life. Kaya ko aayusin ang lahat ng problema. 

Prima Donovan, one of my closest friends since high school offered me a ride. Kaniyang driver ito at sasakyan. Sinabi ko sa kaniyang h'wag sasabihin kay Olivia na pupunta ako. I told her I want to surprise Olivia kaya h'wag sasabihin. But I know, the moment she knows that I'm coming she will leave.

"Ma'am, nandito na po tayo." Manong driver informed me as the car stopped in front of a huge wood gate that has signage. 

I immediately texted Prim that I'm already here. Tinulungan naman ako ni Manong sa pagbaba sa sasakyan pati na rin sa 'king mga gamit. I said my thanks to him. Inilibot ko ang aking paningin at may nakita akong malaking lighthouse hindi kalayuan sa resort. Maganda pala rito, I've never been to Batangas. Hindi naman kasi ganoon kahilig mag-travel si Mom. We didn't do any family outings too. Kung gagala kami rati ay sa ibang bansa dahil kila Lola't Lolo. 

"Liberty! I miss you damn much bitch."

Parang nabulabog ang katahimikan ng lugar dahil sa malakas na pagsigaw ni Prim. She is glowing! Her aristocrat's face is more defined now and her green eye looks mesmerizing than before. Maybe, because it has a beautiful glint right now. Napaka-blooming nito ngayon. 

Dumamba ito sa 'king nang bahagyan at niyakap ako nang mahigpit. I chuckled at what she did. Masyado yata siyang masayang makita ako? Well, it's been half a year the last time we saw each other. Umiinom pa nga siya palagi dahil sa problemang dala-dala na hindi niya sinabi sa 'min. Gusto kong magtampo kaso ganoon din naman ang ginawa ko. I hid things to Prim and Olivia. May mga pagkakataong hindi natin masabi ang mga problems natin dahil hindi pa tayo handa. And we must respect that. We must give them time and wait when they are ready. 

"I miss you too." 

Joy filled Prim's face likesunshine as she clung her arms to mine. She pouted like a child and keep on staring at me. 

"There's something in you..." sabi ni Prim habang nakatitig sa 'kin.

"And what is that, Prima Donovan?" 

"I can't point my fingers to it pero may kakaiba talaga sayo."

Tinatawana ko na lamang ang sinabi niya at niyaya nang pumasok sa resort. It's ten-thirty in the morning at medyo masakit sa balat ang sikat ng araw. Naka-iitim pa naman ang hangin pagmalapit ka sa dagat. It's not like I don't want to get tan but hindi naman kasi naggaganoon ang balat ko. Namumula lang ito. 

"Where's Oly?"

Nagkibit balikat muna si Prim bago ako sagutin."I don't know. After naming mag breakfast ay pumasok siya ulit sa room niya then, hindi ko pa siya ulit nakikita. Honestly, mukhang malaki talaga ang problems no'n. Laging wala sa sarili at matamlay. I'm trying to cheer her up but she just would lighten up."

"I see..." 

I really hurt her bad. I betray her more than she could ever imagine. It breaks her heart deeply and into a million pieces. And what's more worst... I betray her with her dad. The two people who she trusts more than anyone else in the world break her mercilessly. 

Pagkalagpas namin sa lobby ng resort ay dumiretsyo kami sa room ni Prim. Alam niyang hindi ako magtatagal masyado dahil kailangan ko ring umuwi. My Mom will back tonight and I should too. Habang naglalakad ay nagkwekwentuhan kami ni Prim. 

"There's something in you too, Prim"

Mahinahon kong sabi sa kaniya na ikinalingon niya agad. She chuckled and combed her hair using her fingers.

"Well, hindi naman ako makababbalik rito sa Luzon kung hindi ako nagbago. For God's sake, my parent throw me to Visayas para raw magtanda ako!"

"I can see good progress. I'm proud that you put an effort into becoming a better version of yourself. I wish I could too."

"Mind telling what's in you, Libs?"

My ocean blue eyes met her emerald ones. Prim lifted one of her perfectly shaped eyebrows while staring at me. Huminto ko kami sa paglalakad at hinarap niya ako. Nilagay niya pa sa kaniyang beywang ang mga kamay habang nakatingin sa 'kin with an expression saying 'I'm waiting'.

A small smile form on my lip, "I'm pregnant."

Her mouth fell open and her eyes blazed with awe. Prima stood like a stone in her place with that struck facial expression making me laugh. She held up her hands and started jumping, happiness is evident on her face. 

"Oh my God! I'm so happy for you. You're going to be a Mom! I know you'll be a good one. Ninang ako ha." Prim put her hand on my tummy and smile at it.

Our happy moment was disturbed by Olivia's sarcastic greetings. "Wow, you have the guts to show your face in front of me." 

Her face is hard and her jaw is clenching along with her fist. I know that I hurt her and she's anger at me like hell. Pero kahit alam ko na, na ganito ang magiging reaksyon niya ay hindi pa rin ako handa. Hindi ko pa rin pala kayang makita siyang ganito kagalit sa 'kin. 

"O-Olivia..."

Sa gulat nang biglang pagdating niya ay iyon na lamang ang aking nasabi. Alam ko namang siya ang aking ipinunta talaga rito, pero ngayong nasa harapan ko na siya parang hindi pa yata ako handa. Kailan ba ako magiging handan? I took a deep breath before stepping forward to her. Agad ko namang napansin ang pag-atras niya dahil sa ginawa ko. I can see Olivia's forehead creased and her lips drew back in a snarl as disgust and anger pour in.

"Don't you dare come near me. I don't want you near me!"

"Don't be like this Oly..."

"Wait! What's happening?!" gulantang tanong ni Prim. 

She has this surprised and unbelievable expression. Nanlalaki ang mata nito ngayon at nakakunot ang nuo habang bahagyang naka awang ang labi. Tinuro niya pa kaming dalawa habang binabangit ang mga katagang iyon. Hinawakan niya ako sa braso habang nagpapalipat-lipat ang kaniyang tingin sa 'ming dalawa ni Oly.

"Nawala lang ako ng ilang buwan tapos ganito na pala ang nangyayari? Why the are you two fighting?"

Olivia showed a smug look before saying, "Why don't you ask that snake?"

Napatingin tuloy sa 'kin si Prim na may pagtataka, "Ikaw ba 'yon?"

"Ha, sino pa ba sa 'ting tatlo?"

"Oly, naman. H'wag ganito, please. Let's talk calmly." pagsusumamo ko rito.

I just really want to talk calmly kahit alam kong malabong mangyari 'yon. Sino ba namang kayang makipag-usap nang mahinahon, kung malalman mong magkarelasyon ang bestfriend mo at ang dad mo? No one will. 

"From the snake word, I'm concluding na nag-away kayo dahil sa lalaki. Did you steal Olivia's man, Liberty?" tanong sa 'kin ni Prim.

Biglang tumawa si Olivia nang walang kasiyahan, "If that's as simple as that. Tanungin mo isya kung sino ang ama ng anak niya."

Hindi na ako tinanong ni Prim pero ang kaniyang mga mata ay nakaabang sa 'king sagot. Habang si Olivia naman ay may naghahamon na tingin. Umiling na lamang ako dahil hindi ko kayang sagutin 'yon. Nahihiya ako sa ginawa kong kasalanan at hinid ko kayang sabihin 'yon ang harap-harapan sa kanila. If I was strong and courageous enough, e 'di sana hindi na ako umabot sa puntong ito. I'm weak inside but I'm ready to change that. Kaya nga ako nandito, e.

"What? Cat got your tongue? Bakit hindi mo masabi? Nahihiya ka sa kalandian mo? Mayroon ka pala no'n?" 

"Oly, please..."

"Oly, please." she even mimics how I said it then she raise an eyebrow, "Come on, Liberty! Stop playing like you are a damn good girl. You are far from being one. Spare me from your bullshits."

Kitang-kita ko ang apoy ng galit sa mga mata ni Olivia. Her dark eyes got darker because of range and anger. I bit my lower lip trying to suppress my tears from falling. Wala along karapatang umiyak sa harapan niya dahil una pa lang ay alam ko ng mali ang ginawa ko. And I didn't even stop from doing so. Umabot pa talaga kami sa puntong nagka-label at nabuntis ako. I didn't regret loving Oliver Valez but I regret how I betray Olivia. 

"I'm really sorry. I know I'm wrong. Mali ang ginawa ko sa 'yo."

"Of course, you fucked my father and that was so wrong!" 

Narinig ko ang pagsinghap ni Prim sa 'king gilid. Mukhang hindi niya inaasahan na ganoon ang ginawa ko. Pulang-pula na ngayon ang mukha ni Olivia dahilsa gallit. ANg mga ugat niya sa leeg ay nagsisilabasan din. Her hands are fisted hard and deeply. 

"I know, that's why I'm sorry. I just really love Oliver so much that it hurts being away from him. Na kung hindi ko susubukan ay habang buhay akong magsisisi."

"Aren't you regretting it now? Or should I say forever? Hindi ka ba habang buhay na magsisisi dahil sa pantratraydor na ginawa mo sa 'kin? You didn't respect me as your friend dahil sa ginawa mo! Wala lang ba sa 'yo ang pagkakaibigan natin kaya ang dali-dali mo 'tong isawalang bahala?"

"I tried... I tried so hard to stop my heart from loving your father."

"Then you didn't try harder. Kasi kung ginawa mo, wala sana tayo sa sitwasyong 'to. Maayos pa sana tayong dalawa ngayon. I treated you like a family, LIberty! You fucking know how I wanted you to be my family for real. Tuwang-tuwa ako noong malaman kong ikakasal ka sa pinsan ko. But what the fuck?! Tatay ko pala ang gusto mo. I want you to be my family for real but if it's through my father, then don't ever show your face to me." 

Tumalikod na si Olivia sa 'kin kaya agad akong nagmadaling lumapit sa kaniya. Hinabol ko ang kamay niya at hinawakan ito. Mabilis naman niyang hinaklit ang kamay niyang hawak ko kaya medyo napaurong ako. Akala ko ay matutumba ako mabuti na lamang ay nahawakan agad ako ni Prim. Nakita ko ang panlalaki ng mata ni Olivia nang ma-realize niyang muntik na akong matumba. 

"I know you're mad, Olivia but buntis si Liberty. Baka naman pwede tayong mag-ingat kahit papaano." 

I took the chance na gulat pa si Olvia dahil sa kamuntikan ko ng pagkatumba. I kneel on the white sand and hold her legs tightly. Agad naman akong inawat ni Prima sa 'king ginawa pero hindi ako nagpatinag. Nanigas lamang si Olivia sa kaniyang kinatatyuan at gulat na gulat sa 'king nakatingin. 

"I'm sorry. I know my sorry's aren't enough to take all the pain that I've caused you. I'm willing to do anything patawarin mo lang ako. B-Believed me, I love you like a sister too.  I feel so ashamed that I hurt you kahit na puro kabutihan ang ipinakita mo sa 'kin. W-When no one stayed by my side, you did. And I was so -stupid for hurting a wonderful person like you. I was so stupid for hurting my sister. I'm truly sorry."

Hindi ko na napigilan ang pagtulo ng aking mga luha. My heart hurt so bad that I couldn't stop my tears from falling. Sobrang bigat ng aking puso dahil alam kong mawawala sa 'kin si Olivia. Anong  mawawala? You have already lost her the moment you fuck her dad, Liberty. You have lost her long ago. And it was all your damn fault! 

Nagulat ako nang may mainit na patak ng tubig, ang tumulo sa 'king braso na nakayakap sa binti ni Olivia. Inangat ko ang aking tingin kay Olivia, at nagulat akong nakapikit siya habang umiiyak at nakatakip ang mga kamay sa bibig. Her shoulders are shaking because of crying hard. Kahit pa nakatakip ang kaniyang mga kamay sa bibig ay may nakawala paring hikbi. And seeing her cry like this made me cry even more. 

"I know, I'm not in the r-right place but I think I should say this. We all m-mess up at some point in our life but we are all still growing and learning. I-I learn that the hard way. Don't forget to use our heart." 

Napalingo ako kay Prima na ngayon ay umiiyak din habang sinasabi 'yon. She smile sadly at us and walk towards us. Prima hugged Olivia side way as she cries. Mas lalong lumakas ang pag-iyak ni Olivia dahil sa ginawa nito. Pagkatapos noon ay lumuhod naman siya para magpantay kami at hinimas niya ang likod ko. With a sad but reassuring eye, she stares at me. 

"Come on, Liberty. Stand up and stop crying. Makasasama 'yan sa baby mo. The last thing we want is your baby being harm." 

Dahil sa sinabing 'yon ni Prim ay para akong natauhan. Kaya ako nandito ay para humuingi ng tawad at para maging maayos ang relasyon ng magkapatid. Agad along tumayo at sinubukang kumalma. Pinuno ko ng hangin ang aking baga bago dahan-dahan na ibinuga ito. I look at Olivia. Patuloy itong umiiyak habang nakatakip sa mukha ang kamay. 

"Go home, Liberty. I don't want my sibling to be harm in any way."

Ayon lang ang huling sinabi ni Olivia, bago siya tumakbo paalis at iniwan kaming dalawa ni Prima. Hinitay muna akong kumalma ni Prim bago niya ako niyayang umuwi. She even buy me buko juice so I can calm down and relax for a bit. Inaya niya rin ako na magpahinga muna sa kwarto niya. Sinusubukan ko rin na gumaan ang pakiramdam ko dahil ayokong maapektuhan si baby. I'm trying to think of positive scenario like a whole family with Oliver and Olivia with my baby. 

Iniisip kong uuwi si Oliver na may ngiti sa kaniayng labi pagkatapos niyang magtrabaho. His black eyes will glint with happiness as he takes our baby in his arms. Habang masaya naman kaming sasalubungin ni Olivia at lalaruin niya si baby habang nasa bisig ni Oliver. All smiles and happiness. That was what I was picturing in my head habang nasa byahe kami pauwi. 

I'm thankful that Prima come with me. Talagang sumama siya sa paghatid sa 'kin at nanatiling tahimik. Nararamdaman kong marami siyang gustong itanong at sabihin. Pero mas pinili niyang manahimik at bigyan ako ng peace of mind. At wala na akong hihilingin pang iba bukod doon sa oras na ito. Nang makauwi na kami ay papalubog pa lamang ang araw.

"Just give Olivia time, Libs. We both know how soft Olivia's heart." Prima kissed me on my cheeks before leaving. 

Agad kong ibinagsak ang aking katawa ng makarating sa kwarto. Nakatulala lamang ako sa ceiling habang nag-iisp. A single mistake is really poisonous. It makes us forget all the lovable and happy moments that we cherish with that person. Perhaps, it's not about fixing what we have broke. Perhaps, it's about starting over again and creating something better. 

Baby, we'll make it all better than before. Just hold tight to Momma. 

~TBC~

Kamusta naman kaya si Sister Olivia? I hope she's fine dahil need niya ng maghanda at susunood na siya after SA#1!

One last chapter and we're down to Epilogue~ 

Who's excited? 'Cuz I'm! 

Feel free to share your thoughts and keep safe everyone.

Love lots :>>