Chapter Six

"Emma...Emma." I woke up to meet erik's beautiful blue eyes.  "Good morning Angel." I sat up and threw the covers off me.  " it's time to practice your part Emma." He said. He pulled me out of the bed and led me to the piano. "Now lets go over the first song of the opera. Poor Fool." And so we practiced for hours. Once Erik had finished playing  the song for the millionth time. "Now let's move to the acting!" He said with a gleam in his eye. He was very strict when it came to the acting, I messed up a couple of lines and he had a fit about it! "why are you being like this!? I only messed up a few times!" I shouted in frustration to the musical genius. He sighed and stood up and just stared at the sketches and drawings of christine that made my heart feel like it was being crushed in Erik's very own hands. Whenever he looked at the drawings of Christine, he had a look of want in his eyes...I wanted him to look at me like that.Of course I care for Christine as well but with Erik...its like I need him to notice how much I yearn for his praise.Forget what I flipping said about getting over him!! But what the angel said next made me feel like there was hope that he does feel for me! "You don't understand Emma you must be great...NO NO you must be better than great you must be stupendous!" Gosh he's really emotional. I stood in place and replied, my voice cracking "Then we should get back to work then." I plastered a bright smile on my face and walked back to the organ. I heard his footsteps follow me to the organ. And so we began rehearsing again with me putting my entire being into the singing and acting. And it was only for him.

  After hours and hours of exhausting rehearsal Erik finally said I could stop for the night. I wandered around the lair to find something useful to do but nada. Nothing to do. I turned towards Erik and walked over to him while he was busy playing the organ..”It is funny, I always wanted this kind of recognition from you but you still pine for Christine. Why train me when you have her? Her voice is like angels sighing and yet you choose my ametur voice over hers. It doesn't make sense.” He listened and turned from his work standing up, like he was thinking of a way to explain himself. “I am trying to make sense of it myself, but ever since I heard you sing it was like I needed to hear more. You both have extraordinary voices.” he said. So he just wanted both of us for himself. “Erik you can't just have both of us” I crossed my arms and pinched my nose. “And why not? You both are mine.  you have been since the day we met, you can feel that cant you?” He moved closer but gave me space. “You are confusing me..” I muttered and looked at him and he looked frustrated. His temper was getting the best of him as he watched me with those piercing blue eyes. “You and Christine were given to me by God. I know this now, and I'm not letting you two go.” my anger blew up inside me as he said this. “You can't have both of us!!” I yelled, my fists clenched tightly. I had never once raised my voice at Erik and he looked surprised. “You will come to see that I am right Emma. We have been great friends for a long time but what if we can be more. you ...me...and Christine against this horrid dirty world.” he said and moved to me more and took me in his arms from behind. His cold touch made my mind feel hazy as he caressed me. His head dipping down to my neck. I enjoyed this for a while. This is what I have wanted for the longest time, to be in his arms. But it felt wrong. With him wanting both Christine and I. My heart felt broken and confused. Suddenly I try to snap out of it and then pull away pushing him away. “No! No not like this Erik. I can't, not while you still want Christine. You know how I feel now so just stop it.” I said sternly and he looked enraged and also hurt but covered it up with a stiff posture and stoic face. “Fine, then I suppose it's high time you went back.” I did not argue to stay this time and he led me to the boat to give me safe passage back to the dressing room. The whole ride was silent and awkward. Erik walked me up to the mirror and stopped me before I could leave. “I will make you see things my way sooner or later Emma. and you will understand”. He said before opening the mirror and letting me go. I didn't reply and walked out. Feeling a big weight on my shoulders now.  Why did I sing that stupid song!?

Three hours have passed since I had that argument with Erik . Every time I look back on that moment it makes me want to crawl under a rock and die. When I came back I found out no one knew that I was gone for at least three days. Funny thing is that the days often felt melted together when I was down in Erik’s home. It was morning and I was late for practice! I quickly changed out of my day dress from behind the changing screen and into my uniform. A leotard, tights and tutu to match, I laced up my Ballet slippers and ran out of the room in a hurry.  I was curious at the moment where everyone thought I had been for the past three days. And walked across the stage to the left of the stage where Meg was stretching out with the other ballet girls. 

     " Meg, how are you?" I asked. She smiled and had a twinkle in her eye. She hugged me and replied, "Oh Emma!!  How are you feeling? The managers were all in a fuss when they found out what happened to you a couple days ago." My eyebrows scrunched up in confusion. What does she mean? " I am perfectly fine...I know this might sound funny but what exactly happened to me three days ago. it must have...slipped my mind." She looked at me with worry in her blue eyes. "You were sick for the past three days with a bad cold. Maman would not let anyone in your room at all until you got better. Are you sure you're feeling alright?" I would have to thank madame Giry for covering for me.

"Yes i am perfectly fine. The cold might have just clouded my memory a little. Thank you Meg." she smiled a bright smile and giggled and nodded. she grabbed my arm and tugged me towards the other stretching ballerinas. I stifled a small groan as I felt a wave of hunger hit me like a carriage. I had completely forgotten to eat while down with Erik. God am I dumb, I was too nervous to even ask him for bread!!  "Come on if maman does not see us stretching she will have both of our heads!" I quickly got in line and started my morning stretches. I sigh as I decide it would be best to push through. Meg stretched with me and noticed something. "Are you sure you are ok? You look so pale" she said with a worried expression. "Oh yeah I just missed breakfast I must be hungry haha" I tried to laugh it off so she would quit asking me if I was ok. Throughout the whole rehearsal I was a bit of a mess. But madame Giry dismissed it, having known the reason. 

Something suddenly popped into my own mind as practice was finishing up for the day. Christine. Meg was next to me and relaxing her tired feet as we were dismissed. "Meg, how is Chistine? She didnt come to practice" I ask and she had a worried look on her face. "She is still resting, when she returned the other day it was like she had been drained of all color and frightened of her own shadow. Poor thing." Meg pouted. I tensed. Did Erik hurt her? That struck a huge nerve in me as I tried to calm myself. "I need to see her" I say, but Meg grabs my arm tugging me back. "Let her rest. You look like you need it as well from how sick you have been." Meg looked like she wanted to say more but paused. "You are always so protective of her. Ever since we were young you held her to a different light. You must love her dearly." Meg said. I had a sense of panic in my gut for some reason. My cheeks flared a deep red. "Well of course she's like a sister to me. And so are you." I add and hug her. Not wanting her to feel left out but also to steer the conversation. Meg smiled softly and hugged me back. Saying she had to go change and I took this opportunity to go to the kitchens.  

Dashing by people and entering the door. Seeing a couple of cooks making soup and bread for the stage hands. My stomach screamed at me like it was telling me "you idiot feed me!!". I went over to the chef and poked my head in his field of vision. "Hello loui~" I sang and smiled. He sent a smile back at me. His cheeks rosey and plump. And his green eyes staring at me. He was a man in his late thirties. And was very kind. "Why hello miss silver. What brings you here?" He asked as he still worked on the meal. "Well I was wondering, if I could have some of that delicious looking food you are preparing?" I said and gave him my pretty eyes. Practically begging. He sighed and shook his head. "You missed meal time again didn't you?" And with that I nodded sadly. "I was caught up practicing. Oh please loui!! Ill do the dishes for two days!" He chuckled at me and then served me a bowl of the soup he finished and gave me some bread. "There now go on littoe miss. And take small bites, eat slow dont choke" he said and I gleefully took off to the table to devour my meal. "You are the best!!" I then stuffed my mouth with bread and the golden broth filled with carrots, meat and potatoes. He watched me for a moment and then went back to working. "You eat like you haven't eaten in days miss." He said quizzically at me. "Uhm. I juss am real hungree" I said with a full mouth then swallowed. He nodded and then went quiet, ending our conversation but I had a feeling he was still curious about my behaviour. Maybe I should be more careful next time...