a/n: this whole Arkham arc is going to HURT and I haven't even begun writing it yet

"So, maybe we can go crib shopping-"

"Done for. We're just waiting for the gender before we start painting the nursery. I've never seen Dick so excited, Artemis."

"Girl, he's been waiting for this probably since you two were thirteen!" Artemis exclaimed, parking the car in her garage. "And you should be too!"

"I am, I swear!" I laughed, unbuckling Lian from her car seat and held her. "Tim joined the Outsiders recently. With Damian becoming the new Robin, everyone's been on edge recently."

"Yeah, Dick had a full on rant the other day because of it. What is it with Bruce giving that title out for free?"

"The Batman needs a Robin and Dick keeps refusing to go back to it. But it keeps the demon spawn at bay and not trying to kill everything in his path, so I guess it's fine."

"Reminds me of someone I know."

"In my defense, Damian and I were raised by sociopaths. His mother is Talia for crying out loud!"

"Suddenly, I feel bad for the devil child." Artemis shuddered, opening the door to reveal Kaldur, Dick and Will with tears streaming down her face. "Who died and how soon do I have to pick out something black?"

"I think you both should sit down, especially you Maeve." Kaldur gently escorted me inside and Dick took Lian.

"Who is it?" I asked and sat on the couch but they stayed silent. "Who!?"

"It's Connor... he's gone." Will finally spoke and I froze.

Three brothers gone...

"Connor? But-but he's the strong one! He's my big brother. He-he can't be gone..." I managed to say before falling to a fit of sobs. Dick quickly set Lian on the ground and wrapped his arms around me tight. "Not another one... I can't handle another one being gone."

"I've got you... it's okay." Dick whispered and I heard Artemis begin to cry as well.

"Oh, and M'gann! How's she-"

"I stopped by but she refused to open the door. Tim called and said that Gar is refusing to leave his room as well." Kaldur answered.

"He was my big brother... the one who somehow always managed to understand what I was feeling." I cried, feeling Lian climb into my lap. "And I don't know how to help M'gann now and-"

"We give her space but stand at arm's length to catch her if she falls." Artemis said, wiping her tears. "I'll stop by in the morning to check on her."

"My brother... I loved him so much."

"And so did he." Dick assured and I nodded shakily.

"He was so happy to marry M'gann... we talked about it so much before they left for Mars... All of us were finally happy. We were all together again."

"It'll be okay, Mae. We'll get through this and help M'gann. She's not alone." Will promised and I hugged Lian close to me.

"I'm gonna miss him..."

"We all are."

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"You're finally out of bed! It's been a week!"

"Not so loud or I'm crawling back into my hole." I grumbled, grabbing a mug of tea from Alfred. "I better hope you all have work for me because Tim said I should dress up."

"I'm not on board with this!" Dick yelled from the training mat where he was sparring with Cass. "She's pregnant for the love of God!"

"My mother was in her last trimester when-"

"Different bodies, different circumstances, different ways of life... and that's my wife, Damian. Do well to remember it."

"How's Gar doing? I'm worried about him." I whispered to Tim.

"Doesn't leave his room. Perdita stops by but he doesn't let her in. How's M'gann?"

"Same situation. She warded the house and Zatanna can't break it down. We're all giving her space, but staying on the sidelines."

"I think it's best for them both... and you?"

"Itching for some action so I don't fall into the same hole I did when Wall died." I hummed, moving to stand next to Bruce. "Can I know why I'm down here? I'm scheduled for a lobotomy at noon and a pedicure at three."

"This isn't the thirties anymore, Maeve." Bruce rolled his eyes with a small smile.

"I'll perform the lobotomy myself if it meant she doesn't go!" Dick called out and I raised an eyebrow. "Hey, how hard can it be?"

"I'm asking a favor of you, Mae." Bruce sighed and turned to the computer. "Tim and the Outsiders have done an incredible job at tracking down the Joker and his hiding grounds. They've found all but one... Arkham Island."

"And you need me to find it." I slowly realized and he nodded. "I remember one from when I was growing up, East Arkham if I'm not mistaken. It's under the medical wing."

"Then, I'm asking you to-"

"Hell no!" Dick yelled and threw his escrima stick right next to Bruce. "You are asking her to be sent to the same place that deeply triggers her, the place where she held Jason as he took his final breath and for what? To force that sick, sociopathic father in law of mine out of his hiding hole? No way!"

"What if you go with me?" I offered.

"My answer is still no. If you weren't pregnant, then maybe I would consider entertaining the idea. But, sadly for Bruce, you're three months along."

"I'm pregnant, not invalid."

"And because you're pregnant, it's my job to make sure you both are perfectly okay and safe, not running around a madhouse searching for somebody who will bring harm to you both for sheer amusement and nothing else."

"Fine, middle ground time." I said, pulling out one of my guns and threw it at him. "You shoot to kill. You have good aim, hand doesn't shake, firm grip. I'm in danger, you shoot to kill... one swift shot to the forehead should do, but I recommend emptying the magazine to ensure we did it right this time and he actually stays dead."

"Maeve Elizabeth Wayne!" Bruce yelled.

"I'm going whether my husband likes it or not. And he made a vow in front of God and everyone to protect me. And if that means shooting the Joker, so fucking be it. That's called a compromise and it's what makes a relationship work... which you fail to achieve with Selina and every other woman in your life, including your daughters."

"We can have the Team-"

"What Team if my friends are dying left and right!? The Team is nothing but a distant memory at this point! Something childish we all did a decade ago to save Connor from Cadmus and he's... he's dead!" I cried, yanking off my mask and wiped my tears. "Two of my best friends, founding members of the Team are dead, Dad. The rest are retired, in the League or hanging onto a small thread of sanity... what Team is left at this point?"

"Maeve, I didn't know about Connor. I-"

"How could you when you couldn't even pick up a phone to call Clark and ask how he's been? You left the League, but those are still your friends, not threats you have to watch out for." I choked out and Dick reached out to hold my hand. "Back then, being part of the Team was everything to me because I found something to be proud of and they accepted me without judgement. And I owe them so much because they gave us a family when you were too busy to do so... But now, it's falling apart and I can't do anything because I don't know what to do."

"It's not your burden to carry, Mom." Steph frowned and I scoffed.

"I'm the oldest out of all of us and I'm a founding member. It's my responsibility to fix things when they're broken... and my family's broken, all of it."

"Mom-"

"I'll go to Arkham tomorrow. It should give me and Dick enough time to come up with an escape plan should we need it." I decided and walked to the Zeta Tube. "I just need to breathe for a moment, if I'm allowed to."

Recognized: Domino, B-001

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"Do you still need to breathe or do you have room for one more? The rooftop seems lonely."

"Hope you bring a blanket because I'm freezing out here."

"Only because someone decided she wanted to live in the safe house next a river." Dick teased, swiftly climbing up the roof and wrapped a blanket around me. "What's on your mind, funny girl?"

"Life lately."

"Seems depressing."

"It is." I hummed, not tearing my gaze from the Gotham skyline. "Y'know that when I told Connor I was pregnant, that was the only time I ever saw him cry. He even made bets with Will about the gender."

"He was happy for us, always has been." Dick sighed. "He would've killed me if I didn't marry you."

"He told me."

"I knew it."

"I need to fix our family, Dick. It's broken and I need to fix it before our baby comes and is met with a family in shambles."

"Mae, when I married you, they all stopped being my immediate family. Sure, they're family and I love them all to death, but my family is you and the baby you're doing such an amazing job in growing. My responsibilities lie with you first."

"I had a broken family growing up and I thought that choosing this life was gonna make up for it. But it's hard to keep it together when a seventeen year old boy cry himself to sleep in my arms because he thought he was going to be replaced and wasn't good enough... It's hard when I have a fifteen year old boy trapped in an twenty year old body currently God knows where because he can't come home where I can protect him and make sure he's safe and loved. And two of the people I consider to be my brothers are dead and I don't even have a body to bury, just an empty casket and a memorial I can't bring myself to visit."

"Maeve, for years you've kept us all afloat and some didn't notice you were sinking." He said as I wrapped the blanket around him. "You're always taking care of us. Whether it be the Team, the Outsiders now or this family full of lunatics who clearly need to see sunlight at least once... but you won't let me take care of you at times."

"Because I was always able to take care of myself."

"Now you sound like Damian."

"We had similar childhoods in a way." I shrugged.

"I'm not only saying this because you're carrying our child and I married you almost a year ago, but as someone who loves you and is worried... but you have to stop putting yourself down like this and stop getting into the line of fire every damn time or else something bad is gonna happen to you."

"Everything bad has already happened to me, Dick. Even death."

"But now, there's so much more at risk." He pointed out, resting a hand in my belly. "Maeve, I love you to death and even beyond that... but there are some things in life we just can't fix. And this whole thing with Joker... it terrifies me because I know what you're capable of in order to get a moment of peace. I know how mad it drives you that he's still alive."

"I'm not killing him yet. I want him to suffer beforehand." I admitted. "I'm going to drive him even more insane than he already is... I'm gonna be the thorn so far up his ass, he can't breathe properly. And then I'll kill him."

"The baby-"

"Joker won't live long enough to meet his grandchild, regardless if I kill him or not. He's scouring for a cure, so it's my job to destroy any and all progress he's made."

"And then?"

"Then I pull the trigger."