Dallas's POV

--

I am terrified. Terrified my urges will come back. Terrified of loosing control. Terrified of what Nicole will think of me.

When I step out of my room, I want to race right back into it. I don't want to go downstairs where I know my father and Nicole await.

My father understands. I don't know if Nicole does.

As I walk through the hall, the weight of the world is on my shoulders. It's heavy.

The bottom of the stairs is near. Then the kitchen door. With the voices.

"Should I take some food up?" Nicole asks my father when I step through the door. Dad grins at me and Nicole turns, a plate with a pork tamale on it in her hands.

Happiness and then worry register on her face. I don't know how to explain to her.

"Dal? Are you okay?" She asks, her voice quiet. I can't look at her. Her honey scent is already too much. I should go back to my room for another few days.

Instead, I nod and sit in a stool. I can feel her presence as she comes closer to me. I don't look up at her as she talks.

"Your dad said you like Pork Tamales so I made some." She pauses. "Would you.... Would you like one?"

I don't trust myself to speak. So I nod again as she places the plate occupying her hand on the table.

I know she's upset. "Why won't you look at me? Why won't you talk to me?"

I grab the plate, standing up and avoiding her anxious gaze. She grabs my elbow when I turn to head to my room and I hiss. This isn't working.

"Dal?"

I meet her gaze and she stops. We stay there for a moment, looking at each other, and then I go to my room.

--

Later, after I'm done eating, I set my food on my desk. I don't feel like going back down there. I'm not strong enough.

Instead, I lay on my bed on my back. I want to sleep this ache in me away. If it was a perfect world, I'd Mark her. But I can't. Not now. Not now. I won't do that to her.

My eyes close when they grow tired of staring at the ceiling. I must be in a deep sleep away from reality when I finally realize someone's sitting on my bed next to me. I peek one eye open.

Nicole.

Her hand rests on my shin. My skin itches at her touch.

"Nicole. You really need to leave." I mumble quietly. She looks at me.

"I'm not going to."

I grunt and look up at the ceiling, trying to push away my instincts.

"Why don't you just do it?" She asks, tilting her head.

"Oh, Nicole. You have no idea what you're asking." I let out a humorless chuckle.

She tilts her head.

"Just answer."

"I can't. I mean won't. Can't. I just can't. Not right now. We are fifteen and I don't want to do that to you."

"Do you want to?"

Without hesitation, I answer almost as soon as she asks. "Yes. Badly. Everything aches."

"Then do it, Dallas." I hiss again, propping myself up on my elbows.

"No. I can't, Nicole. I don't want..." I break off.

"You don't want what?"

"I don't want you to see me like that. It's not me and I don't want you to see that. I don't want to hurt you."

"Dal. You're going to have to eventually." She scoots closer to me. "Why hasn't this happened before? I've known you for a year." I shake my head.

"I don't know."

"I bet it's probably because I know we're Mates."

"What does my dad think you're doing?"

"Peeing. Washing dishes. Doing laundry." She chuckles. "He doesn't watch me when you're in your room."

She moves her hand to my stomach and I tense.

"Nicole. You need to leave. Now." I realize that she's too close to me too late.

She doesn't speak, only scooting closer to me. She puts her hand on my chest, pushing me back. I'm too tired to stay upright and I fall back from my elbows.

"Nicole. You need to leave now. I changed my mind. I don't want to. No." My voice is tight and she sees straight through the lie. And then she's next to my face.

She looks at me as I look at her in anguish and strain. I wrestle with my wolf for control.

She kisses me, making me grunt in disapproval. I try to stop her.

I tilt my face away. "Nicole. Stop. Please." My voice is hoarse. "Stop.." I'm panicking now.

She presses her lips below my ear, making my breath come out shaky.

"Nicole. I'm l-loosing control... Stop..." I feel my teeth ache. No. No. No!

"Let go, Dallas. It's okay." She says quietly.

I hiss, my eyes wanting to close. "No... Nicole, stop... I'm going - I can't - I n-need..." My eyes finally close when she kisses my cheek.

"Dallas. It's okay."

I groan, my canines lengthening and I try to sit up. She doesn't let me.

"Nicole. Please stop! Please, please, please..." I clutch the bed with my hands, knuckles pale white.

And then the door opens. My father glaring at Nicole.

"Are you crazy?" He asks her.

"Thank the goddess." I swallow hard and close my eyes. I can't do this.

I can feel Nicole's gaze on me as my father takes her outside.

I ache again.

--

I stay in my room for a week. My father brings me food, but that's it. Occasionally, I leave to use the bathroom, but yeah. That is it.

Nicole has no idea how hard this is. At least not yet.

As soon as I Mark her, she'll want to Mark me. Then she'll get the urges.

All I do is stare at my ceiling. I have memorized every inch of it. Left to right. Right to left.

I really want to Mark her. The urges increase daily. I almost have to have my father lock me in again.

The next day, Nicole comes back in my room. But she's with my father. I don't look at her, I just look at him.

"I had another vision." She says. Her gaze burns into me. "My father is going to get me."

I finally look at her and sit up. "No." I stand and my dad stares at me, reminding me. I hiss. "No, he can't. I won't let him." I sound pathetic and I know it.

She shakes her head. "I haven't been wrong yet."

"I know." I sigh, raking a hand through my hair. Nicole watches me. I know she's thinking about Marking. I can tell.

I meet her gaze and we hold it that way.

If I Mark her, I can talk to her. She wants me to. She doesn't want to go to her dad without me being able to talk to her.

I can't tell you how tempting that is.

--

Later on, Nicole comes back to my room.

She sits next to me on my bed. "I want you to Mark me." I let out a whimper.

"Nicole, I'm serious -"

"I am, too. I don't want to be taken. I don't want to. But I know it's going to happen and it won't be that bad if I can talk to you. I want you to Mark me."

"You have no idea. No idea. You have no idea how hard it is to restrain myself when you tell me that."

"Don't restrain yourself."

I curse. The last of my control from before flies out the window. I stand, looking at her. I can't do this anymore.

But again, my dad steps into the room.

"Dallas. Remember." He warns me and I sink back onto my bed, panting. It hurts.

Nicole leaves.

--

The next morning, my dad comes to tell me that Nicole is gone.